“Ian, about what Angela said…”
“Don’t worry about it, love. Just because a test can be done doesn’t mean it will be.”
Gabriel’s nerves crackled. “What if Grey asks her to?”
“Why would he?” Ian stopped at the front door and turned to Gabriel, placing his hands on the omega’s shoulders. “Please stop worrying. If someone needs to worry, I’ll do it.”
Gabriel stared into Ian’s dark eyes. “Are you worried?”
Ian shook his head. “No. And you shouldn’t be either.” He leaned in and kissed Gabriel, tongue sweeping through the omega’s mouth, before wrapping his arm around Gabriel’s shoulders again. “Come on. I’m starving.”
Grey met them at the bottom of the ramp leading to their house in the trees. “You look like you’ve been asleep, Gabe.”
“Guilty as charged,” Gabriel said as the three began to walk toward the dining hall.
“Is something wrong?” the alpha asked.
Gabriel shook his head, and Ian managed to smoothly change the subject.
Gabriel tried to forget while they ate dinner, telling himself Ian was right—just because a paternity test was a possibility didn’t mean it was going to happen. But his damn hormones made him teary-eyed and eating wasn’t helping his nervous stomach. Halfway through the meal, when nausea rolled through his stomach, he stood up from the table.
“I need some air. Please don’t follow me,” he told his mates, who looked at him with worried expressions but honored his request.
Outside, Gabriel took big gulps of the fresh evening air, the cold helping him feel grounded. Carefully, he walked around to the side of the building and leaned against it, waiting to see if his food would come up.
You’ve lied to your alpha, he told himself. Grey’s been so good to you. He trusts you, and you’ve let him think Finny is his.
“But he could be!” Gabriel murmured aloud.
You know he probably isn’t. You weren’t getting pregnant until Ian fucked you.
“It doesn’t matter in the long run.”
Do you think Grey would feel that way? He’s your alpha, and he was so considerate of your feelings when you came to live with him, giving you your own room and waiting for you to feel at home before taking you to bed. What kind of omega are you?
Gabriel squeezed his eyes shut and crouched on the ground. The sky spit snow, the flakes stinging the omega’s face.
“I love him,” he whispered.
You don’t act like it.
Gabriel began to tremble. Clenching his fists, he sat on the ground and stared out into the night. He could hear the diners inside, laughing and talking while they ate, having no care but to fill their empty bellies. Gabriel was different from them. Maybe he’d always known it, and that’s why he initially didn’t want to submit to an alpha. And now he couldn’t carry children without health issues, and he couldn’t even sit in the dining hall and eat with his mates without a nervous breakdown threatening.
He covered his face with his hands. It began to snow harder. Why had he thought himself worthy of the trade to Angel Hills? How had he managed to become first omega of the pack when he was obviously so useless?
“Gabriel.”
Grey’s voice jolted the omega out of his thoughts. His alpha crouched in front of him, eyes concerned.
“Are you hurting?”
Gabriel shook his head. He was shaking and tears clogged his throat. “I’m…just sick to my stomach. Please go back and finish your dinner.”
“We’ve eaten.”
Gabriel glanced behind the alpha. Ian stood silently, hands in his pockets and worry etched all over his face. Gabriel had done it again. He’d gone outside to keep his mates from seeing his turmoil, but he’d lingered too long and caused them more worry. Gabriel swallowed and let out a shaky breath as Grey stood and held out his hand to the omega. He took comfort in the alpha’s large hand wrapped around his as they walked home.
Grey stopped outside the house to talk to Tarz, and Ian accompanied Gabriel inside.
“Why don’t you take a bath? It’ll make you feel better,” the beta suggested.
Gabriel nodded and went into the bathroom with the claw-footed tub, turning on the tap and waiting until it was almost completely full before stripping and easing himself in. His belly was the size of a huge watermelon. He rubbed his hands over it, whispering to the baby inside.
“I should run away.”
The bathroom door opened, and Ian peeked in. “Are you okay?”
Gabriel squeezed his eyes shut, so tired of that question. “I’m fine. I’m sorry I ruined dinner.”
“You didn’t.”
“I don’t want to mess things up any more than I already do.”
Ian knelt beside the tub and took Gabriel’s face into his hands. “Baby, you don’t mess anything up. Grey and I love you. You’re only feeling emotional because of the baby.” He pressed his lips to Gabriel’s. “Please believe me when I say everything’s fine.” He studied the omega for a moment. “Are you still upset about what Angela said?”
Gabriel pulled his face from Ian’s gentle grip. “I can’t help it. We lied, and suddenly I feel so guilty about it. It’s like once it became possible Grey could find out, I panicked and started thinking about it from his perspective.”
“It was necessary.”
“Was it, Ian? Are you sure about that? Because I keep thinking about what Grey would say if he knew.”
“Knew what?” The alpha pushed the door all the way open, and Gabriel looked up in horror. When his eyes met Ian’s again, the beta appeared resigned.
Chapter 19: Xavier
Xavier stayed busy, as he was the only one working in the barn. Christopher was at the omega den, and Gabriel was too sick to help out. The alpha relished losing himself in the labor, but during his down time—when he sat outside to eat lunch or when he laid down at night—he couldn’t help reliving those blessed moments when Christopher’s mouth had been on him.
Had X really said Trace’s name before he came? Knowing that was both embarrassing and disturbing. Embarrassing because poor Christopher must have felt terrible, and disturbing because Xavier felt sure he’d never done the same with Canaan. No way would Canaan keep that to himself; the beta more than likely would have squeezed X’s balls until the alpha yelled for mercy.
Why had Xavier been thinking of Trace during the blowjob Chris had given him? No, the alpha knew he hadn’t been fantasizing about his dead mate as the young beta’s lips and tongue had worked over his cock. Realization poured over the alpha like cold water. It was more like he’d felt that same emotional connection he’d once felt only with Trace.
Fuck.
Placing the broom back in the corner, X sat heavily on a bale of hay. What did it mean? Was he falling for Christopher? A kid?
X shook his head. He really needed to stop thinking of Chris that way. The beta was of age and would probably be snapped up by an alpha or beta any day. The very thought sent molten lava through Xavier’s veins. He couldn’t let that happen.
So, what was he going to do about it?
X stood and got back to work, hurrying to finish because he knew where he was going afterward.
Two hours later, X was showered and headed for the omega den. Since his little epiphany in the barn, he’d been going over and over what to say in his head. He thought over the past. Meeting Trace. Wanting him. Falling in love so hard, the alpha had given the human the bite, turning Trace into a beta werewolf. It had been scary; if Trace hadn’t completely accepted the bite, he would have become one of The Turned, the feral werewolves who roamed in a hostile pack and changed anyone they could get their hands on into savages like themselves. But X had been consumed with his love for the man.
X never questioned his feelings for Trace, but when exactly had he developed them for Christopher? In the beginning, new to Angel Hills and still steeped in sorrow, the alpha had felt the need to take care of the boy, who was all alo
ne, having lost his parents. But it had been Christopher who’d taken care of X, slowly drawing the alpha out of his grief and talking about Trace like it was normal and not something that might send the alpha into a tailspin of crazed emotions.
For the first time, X fully realized how much Christopher had helped him. While Xavier thought fucking out his grief with Canaan had been cathartic, the real healing had taken place in the talks he’d had with the teenage boy.
When the alpha reached the front door of the omega den, he took a deep breath and let it out before knocking. A moment later, Christopher opened the door and peered around it, eyes widening when he saw Xavier standing on the porch.
“Hi. What are you doing here?” the beta asked.
“I came to see you.”
“I thought we’d settled things between us.”
X moved his weight from one foot to the other. “Um, maybe not completely. Can I talk to you? Please?”
Christopher stepped back, inviting X inside. “There aren’t any omegas here tonight,” he explained.
Xavier walked in, glancing around the comfortable-looking living area with its plush couch and large pillows scattered about the floor. A fire danced in the fireplace, and a book had been left open, pages down, on the bear-skin rug.
“You were reading?”
Christopher nodded. He wore a pair of soft flannel pants and a white T-shirt. The beta had pulled his sandy-blond hair into a loose bun, and his feet were bare. X got hard.
Christopher plopped down on the couch, face wary. “What did you want to talk to me about?”
X sank down onto the soft rug at Christopher’s feet. “Well, first, I know I said you didn’t deserve what happened, but I want you to know I really mean it. You’ve helped me so much since I came here, and me saying Trace’s name while you were sucking me was shitty. I didn’t know I did it, but I’ve been thinking about it and know why I did.”
X saw Christopher tense. The beta was listening hard, obviously curious.
“Why?” Christopher finally asked.
X put a hand on Christopher’s knee and the beta jerked before settling.
“Because something about that moment stirred in me emotions I hadn’t felt since Trace.”
Christopher’s eyes widened. “W-what?”
Xavier smiled. Christopher’s reactions calmed him. The alpha wanted to provoke more primal responses from the young beta.
“I think…I think I’m falling for you,” X said quietly.
Christopher’s indrawn breath was loud in the room. “No,” he whispered. “No, you’re not. You don’t even like me.”
Xavier frowned. “What makes you say that? Of course I like you. You’re the only person I’ve had a legitimate conversation with since I got here.”
“You never thought of me—that way before, though.”
X sighed and rubbed Christopher’s thigh, suddenly wishing the flannel pants gone. He wanted to touch the beta. All over. “Thing is, I have. I tried to suppress it, but fuck. You’re really hot.” He couldn’t help but grin at Christopher’s shocked look.
“I am?”
X chuckled and reached for the young man’s hand. “Yeah. Very. And I really want to kiss you right now.”
Christopher’s eyes were the color hazel that sometimes made them look blue and sometimes green. At that moment, they were the color of the deepest waters, light brows arched over them in disbelief.
Suddenly, the beta slid onto the floor in front of Xavier. “I’d really like it if you would.”
X had to think a minute to remember what had been said. When he did, he immediately leaned forward and pressed his mouth against Christopher’s. The beta trembled, hands coming up to press eagerly against X’s neck, slowly making their way downward until they brushed over the alpha’s stiff nipples under his shirt. Xavier sucked in a breath.
“You like that?” Christopher grinned against the alpha’s mouth.
“Oh, yeah.” Xavier took the opportunity to deepen the kiss, plunging his tongue inside Christopher’s mouth. “Mmm,” he murmured.
Christopher responded by arching into the alpha and meeting X’s tongue stroke for stroke.
“For an inexperienced guy, you sure know how to kiss,” X said when they pulled apart.
Christopher smiled. “I’ve been practicing. I mean, when I was seeing Perry.”
The growl escaped Xavier’s throat before he could help it. “Not anymore,” he said, and yanked Christopher onto his lap, kissing the beta until the boy sagged against him, only one part of his anatomy not melting into softness. X traced the hardness inside the flannel with his fingers, and Christopher made a sound that went straight to Xavier’s groin. The alpha grabbed the boy’s ass in his hands.
“Gods, I want you,” he said, voice raspy.
Christopher trembled. “I want you, too. But I don’t know what to do. That blowjob I gave you was all I knew how to do.”
Xavier couldn’t help but laugh. “Don’t worry, I’ll teach you everything you need to know.”
Christopher’s grin was contagious. “Can we start now?”
X nodded, eager.
A knock on the door interrupted him just as he reached for the button of his fly.
“Shit, who’s that?” Christopher stood, hard-on tenting the flannel.
X got to his feet. “Let me get it. At least my boner’s contained behind a zipper.”
“You can’t! What if it’s an omega? Stand back.” Christopher pushed the alpha toward the couch and went to the door. He opened it, surprised to see Gabriel there.
“Why’d you knock?” Christopher asked as the omega walked in.
“I thought you might be in your bedroom and didn’t want to startle you by suddenly appearing in the empty house.”
Gabriel glanced at X. “Oh, hi.” The omega eased himself onto the sofa, eyes going from Xavier to Christopher and back. “I’m going to sleep here tonight.”
X took that as his signal to go. He edged around the beta and omega to reach the door. “I’ll talk to you later, Chris.”
Once outside, the alpha took in a deep breath of air.
Obviously, his and Christopher’s evening would have to be postponed until another time. He pushed at the hard-on in his jeans and sighed before heading home.
Chapter 20: Roanan
Roanan enjoyed going on the hunt, always the first to volunteer when Grey announced the need. That day he’d run miles beside two other alphas and his oldest son, Josh. It was only Josh’s second hunt, and the boy wasn’t taking to it very well. Roanan had long suspected Josh wasn’t an alpha or even a beta. It wasn’t that Roanan was against Josh being an omega—they certainly needed more of those—but Roanan couldn’t help but wish to share the things he enjoyed with his oldest son. Things alphas naturally loved, such as hunting and rough-housing.
Roanan had managed to kill two bucks and four jack rabbits, more than the other three hunters put together. He’d always excelled at taking down game, and remembered many a time his mate, Baron, had praised him over it. A warm feeling spread through Roanan’s chest. He still missed the omega, but after all these years, the memories hurt less.
Josh shifted to human form and placed their kills on a sled to drag back to the compound. The boy had only killed a couple of squirrels, and the look on his face told Roanan Josh had had enough.
When Roanan looked at his son, the alpha saw himself at that age, although Josh wasn’t quite as broad and muscled as Roanan always had been—another indication the boy wasn’t an alpha. Josh had the same dark curly hair and large, dark eyes as his father, and their smiles were the same.
At that moment, though, Josh definitely wasn’t smiling.
After Roanan got the other two alphas hitched to the sled, carcasses securely tied, he watched them set off at a run for the compound. Roanan and Josh began walking in their tracks, remaining in human form so they could talk.
“How did you like it this time? Any better?” Roanan asked as they
made their way across the fields in the gloaming. He knew the answer, of course, but not whether his son would be straight with him.
Josh frowned. “I don’t know.”
Roanan softened his voice. “It’s okay, son. I can tell hunting’s not for you.”
Josh looked upset. “Does that mean I’m not an alpha?”
“Not necessarily, but I think we both know you aren’t.”
Josh hung his head as he walked. “I don’t think I’m a beta either,” he said so low Roanan almost didn’t catch the words.
The alpha reached over and ruffled his son’s curls. “I know.”
Josh looked at Roanan then, dark eyes huge. “You’re not mad?”
“Why would I be? Son, omegas are very, very precious to werewolves. I thought you knew that.”
“Yeah, but I thought maybe you might want me to be like you.”
Roanan shrugged. “Whatever you are is fine with me. Your other father was an omega, and I loved him very much. And I love you. I’m proud of you no matter what.”
Josh’s grin told Roanan he’d said the right thing, and the alpha’s heart constricted. Raising the three boys without a mate had been difficult, but every so often Roanan got things right.
“How long have you known?” he asked Josh.
“A few years. I just didn’t want to disappoint you.”
“Impossible,” Roanan said, giving his son a playful shove. Josh returned it, and laughing, they picked up the pace.
“You should be spending your time at the omega den with the others. You’ll enjoy it.”
“Okay, I will.”
By the time they skirted the cliffs and reached the compound, the sun had set and Grey stood watching several men unload the kills from the sled.
Something seemed off about the pack alpha. Roanan thought he looked agitated, but nothing about the scene gave any indication that something was amiss. Everyone else seemed calm as they began to quickly skin and cut up the kills. Roanan sent Josh home to feed his brothers. After a time, Grey shifted and ran off into the darkness, and as Roanan began helping the others divide up the meat, his feeling that something was wrong became even stronger.