Paloma rests a hand on my shoulder. Her touch so reassuring I return to Dace with a heart full of hope. My hands moving over his torso, seeking a wound. Though it’s not long before I determine that the outside is as perfect as ever. It’s the inside that’s failing.
“The damage is internal. Something tells me it’s his heart that’s failing.” I strain to see through the dark to the shadowy figures who guide me. Though they remain unseen, I can still feel them, and it’s Django who speaks next.
“Daire, my beautiful baby girl. I’ve been watching after you since the day you were born, and I’m so incredibly proud of you. Not only have you faced the very thing I tried so hard to flee—you’ve succeeded in all the places I failed.”
“The only way to heal Dace is to love him.” The voice belongs to Valentina. “Jolon was right about miracles—they’re nothing more than love in action. But you’ll have a hard time working one if you can’t find it within you to love yourself first.”
I swallow hard, reach for the key that hangs from Dace’s neck with one hand, while grasping my own with the other.
“When you curse your destiny, you curse yourself,” Django says. “I’m a prime example of that. But you are the Seeker, Daire. And Dace was so proud of you he gave you the tool that allowed you to take him down. He understood all too well what you would be called to do, and he forgave you long ago. Now it’s time for you to forgive yourself. Time for you to love yourself. It’s the only hope Dace has, but you can’t give what you don’t have.”
Love myself.
A pretty tall order considering the circumstances.
Still I’m committed to trying, I have everything to lose if I don’t.
My father’s words reminding me of the day I visited Paloma’s grave—when I faced the mountain and rededicated myself to my legacy and the destiny I was born to claim.
No matter what becomes of me—I won’t go down easily. The Richters will pay for the heinous acts they’ve wrought on this town—on my loved ones—on the Lower, Upper, and Middleworlds, which are mine to keep balanced.
From the moment I killed Cade, I made good on at least half my word. Though the three worlds still need to be dealt with.
Still, no one ever promised a clean victory. And Paloma always warned that a Seeker’s life is one of incredible sacrifice.
But what if it doesn’t have to be?
As I’ve already seen, prophecies are not concrete.
What if the future really is mine to design?
I lean toward Dace, pushing our keys together until the edges are evenly matched. Clearing my heart of regret and replacing it with a surplus of love, I lower my lips to meet his and kiss him with all that I have.
But it’s not enough.
His breath hitches. Falters. And I have no idea what to do next—until Paloma whispers, “It’s just like I taught you, nieta. You’ve got to peer through the darkness and see with your heart—if you are to see his.”
I shutter my eyes, blocking out everything but the boy lying before me. Cutting through the darkness I delve inside his body, peering at a heart choked by a tangled web of darkness that must be removed if Dace has any hope of surviving.
Now turn on your light.
With my hands centered over his chest, I summon my light and project it toward him. Watching it chip away at the darkness until it’s nearly diminished, allowing his heart to swell and expand.
But before it can be completely eradicated, Dace heaves a harsh breath, followed by another.
“Not to worry,” Valentina says. “The bit of darkness that remains won’t harm him. Everyone has a shadow side. This just makes him human. Though there’s still more to do, your fix is only temporary.”
“Wait—what?” I peer into the dark. “He’s breathing—what more can I do?”
“While your light has served to illuminate his darkness—when you killed his twin, he took a piece of Dace’s soul with him,” Paloma says. “Without it, I’m afraid he won’t last.”
No.
No!
I rock back on my heels. Hardly able to believe I had it all wrong. I was sure that the only way to kill Cade without harming Dace was to catch him in beast mode, or, in his case, Coyote mode. Turns out I was wrong.
One brother down.
Won’t be much longer until the other one follows.
“But there is a way . . .” Django hovers by my side. “I’ve seen your soul, Daire. It’s strong—fueled by so much love and light I’m betting you have plenty to spare.”
I glance over my shoulder, and for one fleeting second I see him, really see him, materializing before me. The father I’ve only known from old photos is smiling and nodding and encouraging me to act before it’s too late.
I return to Dace, unsure how to proceed.
“Think of it like a soul jump,” Paloma says.
“Only this time, you’ll leave a piece of your soul behind,” Valentina chimes in. “You’ll be bound forever—but isn’t that what you both want?”
Bound.
Fated.
In the way we always dreamed.
Finally, the nightmare that started this journey gets a new ending.
I focus on Dace with all that I have, vaguely aware of my body collapsing as I enter his world and my soul merges with his.
Viewing Dace as a young boy, eagerly exploring the world.
Dace as a teen, the very first day he laid eyes on me.
Dace as the beast, calling on every scrap of what remained of his will to spare me from his drive to kill.
His love for me matched only by my love for him—I leave him with a piece of my soul and slowly extricate myself.
Finding myself back in my body only to discover the world is still dark.
My ancestors are gone.
And Dace is lying inert before me.
I’ve failed.
Truly failed.
Nothing left to do now but wait for the end.
The thought leaving me strangely still and bereft—until Dace drags a long inhale and pulls me into his arms.
FORTY-THREE
XOTICHL
The second the world falls dark, Auden clasps tightly to my hand and we fall into a state of communal stunned silence.
There’s no need to speak, when we both know what it means.
Daire is dead.
The beast has won.
The dark days have dawned.
And our lives are over before they had a chance to really get started.
Though, for Auden and me, our lives were in jeopardy well before that.
“Auden, I—” I want to share my regret at not being able to see how the Richters were manipulating us all this time, when I notice a sliver of space opening up all around him.
At first it’s subtle. No more than a glimmer. Though it’s not long before it expands into a glorious nimbus of light that circles around him. Stretching and pulling at the edges until he’s completely illuminated.
“Auden,” I whisper. “You’re glowing! Can you see it?”
“Are you serious? I can’t even see my own hand.” He raises it between us and wiggles his fingers to illustrate his point.
“Wait—” I fall silent for a handful of seconds, long enough to see if my suspicions are right.
“Xotichl, what is it?” He squeezes my fingers, but the glow is now gone and I can no longer see him.
“If I’m not mistaken, I think I might’ve just found a way to get us out of here.” The sound of my voice bouncing off Auden’s form causes him to light up again, confirming I’m right. “It’s kind of like echolocation, except instead of sensing the sound wave of the object before me, I can actually see what’s before me.”
“You can see me? Now? Seriously?”
“I can’t see you in perfect detail, but I can definitely determine it’s you. You know, when I first started seeing Paloma, I asked her to show me how to do it, especially when we discovered I was guided by Bat. But Paloma said she could d
o me even better, and taught me how to rely on my blindsight. And yet, ever since my vision returned, my blindsight was lost. Until now.”
“What do you think changed?”
“I think it’s because I was never afraid of the dark. Before I met Paloma and started reading energy, eternal night was the natural state of my being. Whatever the reason, as long as I keep talking, I’m pretty sure I can lead us out of here.” I take a step forward, tug on Auden’s hand, expecting him to follow, but he remains firmly in place.
“Where are we going, flower? If it’s dark here, it’s dark everywhere. Doesn’t matter where you lead us. It’s all the same in the end.”
While he makes a good point, there’s no denying I’ve just been offered a gift, and I refuse to ignore it. “Honestly,” I say, “I have no idea where we’ll end up. But we’ll never get further than here if we don’t at least try. As long as our friends are still out there I refuse to call it quits. At the very least, we need to determine what happened to them.”
FORTY-FOUR
LITA
The second the world turns dark, I sink to my knees in surrender.
Overcome by a combination of exhaustion and I-no-longer-give-a-crap defeat, I officially call an end to the fight.
I’ve been running from demons and hiding from Richters for too many hours to count. And now, with Daire clearly dead, I don’t see the point in continuing.
There’s nowhere to go.
Nothing to see.
It’s just a matter of time before evil claims me.
I drop my head in my hands. Give myself permission to cry. But surprisingly, the tears just won’t come. Instead of the panic I assumed I would feel, I find myself immersed in a strange wave of calm.
I guess there really is peace in certainty.
Even if the thing you’re certain about is your own grisly demise, it’s still better than the anxiety that comes with not knowing.
And it’s not like I don’t see the irony.
When Axel first left, it felt like the end of the world. But clearly I was wrong. The end doesn’t feel anything like I imagined it would.
It’s not at all panicky.
Doesn’t make my heart ache so badly I’m sure it’s about to implode.
It just feels final.
Imminent.
Sure to find me when it’s good and ready.
With nothing more to do than wait, I settle onto the ground and curl up on my side. Resting my head on my arm, I tuck my chin to my chest, and allow my eyes to drift closed, when something floaty and soft tickles the tip of my nose.
I gasp. Leap to my feet. Convinced some kind of foul creature, most likely a cockroach since they’re definitely set to inherit the earth, is building a nest in the neckline of my dress, I frantically bat at myself, until it tips from the bodice and glides to my feet, where I discover it isn’t even remotely close to an insect.
It’s the eagle feather Axel gave me right before he left.
Same feather I stashed in my bra, figuring it was useless.
But now, with nothing to lose, I hold it before me and squint into the dark. Striving to make out its lilting form, but unable to discern anything more than the shadowy curve of its vane, I close my eyes and make a wish.
One that isn’t the least bit frivolous.
If Axel is right, if belief and intent really are the spine of both miracles and magick, then I can’t afford to not take this seriously. Gathering every shred of faith that remains, I project it onto the feather. Refusing to feel silly, refusing any emotion other than my unwavering devotion to see that it’s done.
Imagining how the scene might look. How it might make me feel, both inside and out. Until I’m so consumed with the vision, I snap my eyes open, expecting to see it manifesting before me, only to find I’m surrounded by black.
I settle back onto the ground, bring my legs to my chest, and wrap my arms around them. Consoling myself with the thought: At least I tried. At least I gave it all that I had. When a hand clasps onto my shoulder, and Xotichl says, “Hey, Lita. You okay?”
FORTY-FIVE
DACE
“How much do you remember?”
Daire lifts a hand to my brow, and I’m quick to reach up, clasp it in mine. All the while giving silent thanks for the darkness that shrouds me.
While I’m glad the beast has been slayed, while I’m grateful to be reunited with the love of my life, unfortunately, I have full recall of every heinous act.
Every evil urge.
My rampage lives on in a spool of horrifying images that’ll haunt me for the rest of my days, and I couldn’t bear for her to see me this way.
But to Daire, I just say, “I remember plenty. Enough to know I’ll never be able to make up for all that I’ve done—”
She places a finger to my lips, halting the words. “The Richters are gone. You spared Chepi’s life. And while you could have easily killed me, you always stopped short.”
“And what about Leftfoot?” My voice croaks. I bury my face in my hands. Tormented by the image of my mentor and friend with his slashed and bloodied neck. “He wasn’t a demon. Wasn’t even a Richter. He was like a father to me. How am I supposed to make peace with that?”
Daire falls quiet, taking a moment to gather her thoughts before she speaks. “It was an accident—Jennika shot you with an arrow and in your attempt to flee, you accidentally cut him.” I turn my head to the side, reluctant to believe her. “Look, you may never make peace with your actions, but you have to accept the things you’re unable to change. Otherwise, peace will elude you in all facets of life, not just the ones of your choosing.”
I pull her to me. Fold my arms tightly around her. Aware of her soft even breath, the cool smoothness of her skin. Marveling at how close she came to dying at my hand—but for some reason, even in full-blown beast mode, I couldn’t go through with it.
Though the all-consuming desire to make Leandro pay for what he did to my mother never abated.
I’m glad he’s finally gone.
I take solace in knowing he can never again harm anyone who has the misfortune of veering into his path.
Though it does nothing to erase the harm he’s already caused.
Still, if Chepi’s learned to live with it, found a way to look past the painful memory of how I came to be, then maybe, someday, I can learn to accept it as well.
“So, where do we go from here?” I return to Daire.
“First, we find a way to return order to the worlds, then we locate our friends.” Her voice is determined. “And then, once that’s done, we celebrate this event like the victory it is.”
“Any ideas on how to begin?”
Daire grins. Although I can’t see it, I can feel it in the way her energy lightens and lifts. “That’s where Raven comes in.”
I remain quiet, the question posed by my silence. Raven’s locked in a cage, somewhere in the distance.
“Raven flies into the dark to bring forth the light.”
“Another soul merge?” I ask, my voice betraying my worry. Although she hasn’t mentioned it, I can feel her presence thrumming inside me. Unlike the beast, hers is a presence I cherish. She’s the reason I’m here. The reason behind every breath. And while I’m grateful beyond words, I worry another attempt will leave her depleted.
“Not to worry,” Daire says. “After all of this time, I finally understand what Paloma was really trying to teach me. I don’t have to merge with Raven to call on the power of Raven. He guides me. He’s in me. All I have to do is access his truth. There’s an old story about Raven stealing the sun from Coyote, who was determined to keep the world shrouded in darkness. It was back in Valentina’s time. She was one of the earliest Seekers, she went to great risk to document the events of her life and she’s often the one who comes to me in times of distress. Despite the centuries that separate us, my life often mirrors hers. But now, with the Richters finally gone, I’m determined to get a much happier ending than Valentina could se
cure for herself. It’s like I owe it to both of us.”
“And how does Raven fit in?”
“By realizing the underlying truth of the story. The light Raven brings forth isn’t just out there, it’s in here.” Daire grasps my hand, presses it tightly to her chest. “Paloma always told me to use my light—claiming it’s the one thing that would lead the way. At the time, I chalked it up to more woo-woo, abuela, Seeker-speak. I didn’t really give it a whole lot of credence. But there’s no denying it was my light that brought you back. And I’m hoping to use that light to illuminate the three worlds again. It’s time I use my connection to the elements for something more than an outlet for grief.”
She lets go of my hand, gets to her feet, and stands tall beside me. Humming the first few lines of a song under her breath, when she’s interrupted by the distant clamor of footfalls.
More Richters.
Or, perhaps even demons.
Who else would charge so freely through the night?
Guess I didn’t get them all like I thought.
I stand before Daire. Feet spread wide, hands clenched by my sides, as she continues her song, not missing a beat. With no place to take cover, we’re completely exposed. Still I’ll do whatever it takes to keep my girl safe.
I take a step forward, ready to face the threat, whatever it may turn out to be. The bit of darkness Daire failed to eradicate thrumming, stirring, enlivened by the possibility of another bout of violence, an act of revenge.
Only this time, unlike the last time, the darkness is mine to control.
I will do what’s required and no more.
I won’t be ruled by revenge fantasies—won’t cause any more harm than is actually warranted.
The ground shakes from under my feet.
A fierce wind whips through the land.
As the night sky cracks open, releasing a hard-driving rain.
And still the enemy approaches.
Daire’s singing the songs of Wind—Fire—Earth—Air—the very harmonies revealed to her after surviving a series of brutal initiations during her training. But while the songs allow her to manipulate the elements—they fail to restore light to the worlds.