“I’m thinking about the show.”
“Did you enjoy it?”
Had she enjoyed it? “Yes,” said Ruby, aware of the trouble Min had gone through to get the tickets.
But she couldn’t stop thinking about Eva.
Nikki was awakened on Sunday morning by Mae pouncing on her in bed and exclaiming, “One more day of vacation!”
Nikki had been thinking about the subject a bit differently. When she had gone to bed the night before, she had said grumpily to herself, “Just one more day of vacation.” And then it would be back to school and homework, Tobias would be gone …
“Ugh,” said Nikki with disgust.
“Nikki! What’s the matter with you? We have one more whole free day! Maybe we can make Christmas ornaments. Or — I know! — maybe Tobias will drive us into town. Hey, let’s make pancakes for breakfast!”
At last, Nikki smiled. “Okay. Pancakes. I like that idea.”
Nikki, with a great deal of sloppy help from Mae, made a pancake breakfast for her family.
“This is heavenly,” said Mrs. Sherman as she sipped her coffee later. She glanced uncertainly around the messy kitchen, though.
“Don’t worry,” said Nikki. “We’re going to clean up, too. That’s part of the deal.”
“It is?” said Mae unhappily.
“Definitely. Mom’s been working very hard.”
“I’ll help,” said Tobias. “It’ll go fast, Mae. You’ll see.”
“Thank you,” said Mrs. Sherman.
“When we’re finished,” said Mae, “we’re going to make Christmas ornaments.” (Nikki had not yet agreed to this.)
“That sounds like fun,” said their mother, “but before you get started, I need to talk to you — to all three of you.”
Nikki, who had been rinsing off dishes in the sink, turned around and faced her mother warily. “About what?” she asked.
“I’ll explain in a few minutes.”
“But —”
“Come on,” said Tobias, nudging Nikki. “Let’s finish up. Mom, where do you want to talk?”
“In the living room.”
“Okay.” Tobias handed Mae a dish towel. “Nikki’s washing,” he told her. “You dry, and I’ll put things away.”
“Tobias, do you know what Mom wants to talk about?” asked Nikki. She could feel the pancakes sitting uncomfortably in her stomach and wished she hadn’t eaten so many.
“Nope. But Mom looks serious, so let’s finish cleaning up and find out what’s going on.”
“I have a bad feeling —” Nikki started to say.
Tobias nodded pointedly in Mae’s direction. “But it’s important to think positively.”
Nikki closed her mouth and concentrated on the dishes. When the kitchen was clean, she and Mae and Tobias sat in a row on the couch in the living room, facing their mother, who was perched stiffly in an armchair.
“Mommy, you’re not smiling,” observed Mae. “So I know this is something bad.”
“No,” replied Mrs. Sherman gently. “It really isn’t. But it is something serious, and we need to discuss it.”
“Did someone die?” asked Mae suddenly.
“Good lord, no!” exclaimed her mother. “What made you say that?”
“It was the worst thing I could think of.”
“Mae, I just said that it isn’t bad. Now, listen, kids. I’ve wanted to talk to you about this for a while, but I was waiting until we were all together.”
“Are we moving?” interrupted Mae.
Mrs. Sherman sat back in her chair. “No!”
Nikki put her arm across her little sister’s shoulders and then reached around to clap her hand over her mouth. “Let Mom talk,” she said sternly.
“While it isn’t bad news,” Mrs. Sherman continued, “I thought you might feel somewhat … unsettled. So I waited until the end of vacation to have this discussion. I didn’t want to spoil Thanksgiving.”
The pancakes in Nikki’s stomach gave an ominous lurch.
Mrs. Sherman drew in her breath. “All right. I think you know that your father and I are in touch from time to time,” she began. “We’ve been writing letters and we’ve spoken on the phone.”
Nikki’s mouth fell open. She had a horrifying feeling that the next words out of her mother’s mouth would be, “And we’ve decided to get back together.” Nikki said nothing, though, and was grateful she had held her tongue, because when her mother went on, she said, “And, well, we’ve decided to get a divorce.”
Up until that very moment, if anyone had asked Nikki how this news would make her feel, she would have replied, “Great. It couldn’t happen sooner.” But now that the news was staring her in the face, and even after her short-lived fear that her drunken father was going to return to their lives, she found that what she really wanted was a chance to go back in time, a chance to erase the nastiness and retract the words spoken in anger, a chance for her family to start over, or to do whatever you had to do in order to wind up with two happy parents and three happy kids living together under the same roof. Which was sort of silly, because how many families like that did Nikki know? Flora and Ruby lived with their grandmother, and plenty of other kids at her school lived with just one parent or with foster parents or went back and forth between divorced parents. A mom and a dad and a few kids was hardly a standard family these days. And yet that was exactly what Nikki now found herself wishing for. But she couldn’t say any of these things, not in front of Mae, who still believed in fairies and ghosts and might well believe that they could be a happy family if only Nikki wished hard enough.
“I thought you were already divorced,” said Mae. “Last year I told everybody in my class that you got divorced.”
Mrs. Sherman cleared her throat. “Well, it’s true that Daddy doesn’t live here anymore, and we don’t intend to live together again. But we haven’t actually gotten the divorce. We need to sign some papers and see a lawyer to make it official.”
“I think this is a good thing,” said Tobias after a moment.
Nikki took his thought one silent step further and realized that her brother meant this was a good thing because now their mother would be free to get married again one day.
“It is a good thing,” said Mrs. Sherman. “At least, it’s the right thing. Legally we need to do it. And I’m telling you about it now because in order for this to happen, your father will have to return to Camden Falls soon.” Beside her, Nikki felt Tobias stiffen. “We’ll see the lawyer together, and your dad will come to the house to pack up the rest of his things.”
“Where’s he going to live?” asked Mae. “I mean, after the divorce?”
“He isn’t sure,” said Mrs. Sherman (at this, Tobias jerked his head up sharply), “but I suspect he’ll go back to his job. He’s working in South Carolina at the moment.”
“That’s far away, isn’t it?” asked Mae ner vously.
“Very far away,” Mrs. Sherman assured her.
“When is he coming back here?” asked Nikki.
“Probably in January. We want to get this taken care of as soon as possible.”
Tobias had edged away from Nikki and now sat forward on the couch, his hands clasped desperately. “Where is he going to stay while he packs up his stuff?” he said roughly.
“Well, he’ll have to come to the house in order to do that,” replied Mrs. Sherman.
“I know, but where is he going to stay?”
Nikki glanced uneasily at her brother. Here was the Tobias from the old days, the one whose temper could erupt in the blink of an eye.
“I don’t know,” said Mrs. Sherman. “We haven’t worked out all the details yet.”
“Well, he is not going to stay here,” Tobias told her. “I won’t let him. He can stop by to pack up his stuff, but that’s it. He’ll have to stay somewhere else. And I plan to be here when he’s in Camden Falls. I don’t care when that is. I’ll take time off from school if I have to.”
“Why, Tobias?” asked Mae, her v
oice wobbling. “Why do you need to be here?”
Mrs. Sherman glared at Tobias, and he made an effort to relax. “It’s not important, Mae,” he said. “Don’t worry. I just want to see Dad, that’s all.”
“Mom?” said Nikki. “After you and Dad are officially divorced, will Mae and I have to spend any time with him? That’s what other divorced kids do. They live with one parent and visit the other, or they go back and forth between their houses. I know Tobias won’t have to do that if he doesn’t want to since he’s eighteen, but what about Mae and me?”
Before their mother could answer, Mae leaped to her feet. “I don’t want to visit Daddy!” she wailed. “I want to stay here.”
“Believe me, you’re not going to visit Dad,” said Tobias, temper boiling again.
“But he might demand that we visit him,” said Nikki, who could feel her throat thicken. Tears weren’t far away. “What about custody arrangements? He might agree that we can live here during the school year, then he’ll get us for the summer and vacations.”
“Mommy, no!” cried Mae. “No! I don’t want to go far away from you! And I don’t want to stay with Daddy.”
“Everyone, please calm down,” said Mrs. Sherman quietly. She stood up, crossed the room, squeezed between Nikki and Mae on the couch, and slipped her arms around them. “I really don’t think that’s going to happen. I do not think your father is going to push for custody arrangements like that. He doesn’t like responsibility, and I frankly don’t think he could afford to support you for an entire summer.”
“What about for a week? What if he wanted us at Christmas or for a week in the summer?” said Nikki, and now the tears did begin to fall. “We’ve never been to South Carolina. And I don’t want to live with Dad for even a day.”
Mrs. Sherman turned to Nikki, but before she could say anything, Tobias got to his feet. “I wouldn’t let that happen,” he said. “I wouldn’t let any of those things happen.”
“But what if the judge said we had to go?” Nikki tried not very successfully to hold back a sob.
“Honey, I think you’re getting way ahead of things,” said her mother. “I would never have brought this up if I thought you’d get so upset.”
“That doesn’t help any!” wailed Nikki. “I thought you were going to say you didn’t bring this up because these things aren’t going to happen and we’re worrying for nothing. But you didn’t say that. You think they might happen, don’t you? And you just don’t want us upset.”
“Nikki, Nikki.” Her mother gathered her in her arms. “Of course I don’t know for sure what your father is going to ask for or what a judge might say, but I truly do think you’re worrying for nothing. Can you honestly see your father making all the arrangements necessary for you and Mae to visit him? Or having enough money to support the three of you instead of just him? He barely remembers to send us money as it is. And if it came to it, all you’d have to do is tell a judge about the kind of father your dad was when he lived here. I don’t think any judge in his right mind — or hers — would decree that you and Mae had to spend time with him far from home. He might be granted visitation rights here, but how often do you think he’d make his way back to Massachusetts? He hasn’t been here in almost a year as it is.
“Seriously, Nikki,” continued Mrs. Sherman, “set these worries aside. You, too, Tobias and Mae. Let’s just concentrate on getting through the divorce. That will have to happen first. And before that …”
“Yeah?” said Tobias and Nikki.
Mrs. Sherman looked at Mae.
“Before that,” said Mae obediently, “comes Christmas.”
“Yes. So let’s think about having a nice holiday.”
“All right.” Nikki fumbled for a Kleenex and blew her nose. “But I am not going to let this go. I’m going to read and study about divorces and custody arrangements and visitation rights and I’m going to be prepared if I have to talk to a judge. I’m going to make sure I’m taken seriously.”
The rest of the morning passed more quickly than Nikki had thought it would. She did indeed make tree ornaments with Mae, trying to concentrate on pinning and gluing and snipping and coloring instead of on her father. When lunch was over and Tobias said it was time for him to go back to school, Nikki wrapped him in a fierce, tight hug and he held her close.
As he was walking out the door, his laundry bag now full of clean clothes, he whispered to her, “I will never let anything happen to you or Mae.”
“I can’t believe we have to go home today,” were the first words out of Ruby’s mouth when she awoke on Sunday morning. She rolled over and peered at her sister, who was sleeping next to her on the sofa bed in the living room.
Flora rolled away from Ruby. “What time is it?” she managed to mumble.
“Six-forty-four,” said Ruby brightly.
“Six-forty-four! You’re never awake this early on a weekend.”
“But this isn’t just any weekend. It’s a weekend in New York City. I don’t want to waste a second of it.”
“Aren’t you tired? We went to bed so late last night.”
“Nope,” said Ruby. “Not a bit tired.” She bounced on the bed. “I hope we can eat breakfast in a restaurant before we go home.”
“One last chance to try snails?” muttered Flora from beneath her pillow.
“Ha-ha. No, I saw a big coffee shop a few blocks away. Do you think Min would let us eat there by ourselves?”
“Just you and me? Absolutely not.”
“Well, maybe we could at least sit at a separate table and pretend we’re by ourselves.”
“Ruby,” said Flora, assuming a most annoyingly adult tone, “you’ve hardly mentioned Janie the whole time we’ve been in New York. Are you only thinking about restaurants and sightseeing and souvenirs? Don’t forget the reason for our trip.”
“I didn’t forget about Janie! But Aunt Allie can’t visit her or anything, and I didn’t want to make her feel bad. I was thinking to myself, Allie has to go back to Camden Falls today without the baby, and that’s very sad. You should really try to put yourself in other people’s shoes, Flora, and see things from their, um, from their … shoes.”
Flora did not reply.
“I’m going to go see if Min and Aunt Allie are awake yet,” said Ruby. “I want to ask about the restaurant.”
“Go out for breakfast?” was Min’s sleepy reply when Ruby jumped on her bed a few moments later.
“Please?” begged Ruby. “I know we have to go home this morning, but we do have to eat breakfast — you always say it’s the most important meal of the day — and if we eat out, then Aunt Allie won’t have to cook for us.”
“Very thoughtful of you,” said Min. “Any particular place you had in mind?”
“The Silver Spoon,” replied Ruby instantly. “I saw it on Friday. I think it’s only a few blocks from here. It looked like a great place for breakfast. It’s very big and has booths and twirling displays of desserts.”
“Which you are not going to eat for breakfast.”
“No, no, of course not.”
“All right. I’ll see what Allie wants to do.”
An hour and a half later, Ruby, Flora, Min, and Aunt Allie were dressed, their suitcases were packed, and Allie had taken several walks through the apartment, checking to see that she had left everything in order.
“I guess we’re ready,” she said at last. “We can bring our things downstairs and leave them in the lobby while we’re at the restaurant.”
And so Ruby bid a sad good-bye to the only Manhattan apartment she had ever known. As she walked out the door she said to herself, Someday I’m going to live in an apartment just like this. Except that it will be in a building full of famous people.
The Silver Spoon was exactly as Ruby had described it. It was indeed very large and full of both tables and booths. And near the cashier’s counter by the door were three tall display cases in which cakes, pies, pastries, and even dishes of Jell-O cubes rotated slowly
.
“Min?” said Ruby.
“No.”
“Darn. Well, if I can’t have a dessert, then could Flora and I at least sit at our own table?”
“At your own table?”
“You know, and pretend we’re here by ourselves.”
Min glanced at Aunt Allie. Then she looked around the restaurant. “I suppose it would be all right,” she said at last. “Does this mean you want to pay for yourselves, too?”
“Min!”
“Or better yet, treat all of us,” said Allie.
Ruby reluctantly opened her wallet and began to count her money.
“We’re teasing, honey,” said Min gently. “Yes, you and Flora may sit at a separate table as long as Allie and I can see you. We don’t want you far away. And we’ll pay for breakfast.”
“Thank you! Oh, thank you, Min!” cried Ruby. “Come on, Flora.”
Min grabbed her arm. “Wait. The hostess will show you to a table.”
As Ruby followed the hostess to a booth by the windows, she decided that she had never in her life felt quite as grown-up as she did at that moment, especially when she realized that some of the other people in the restaurant were watching her. She whispered to Flora, “Those people are probably thinking, Look at those girls out for breakfast all by themselves. They must be real New Yorkers.”
Ruby was slightly disappointed when the hostess then showed Min and Aunt Allie to the very next booth, but she recovered quickly when a waitress arrived at their table and said, “What’ll it be, girls?” and didn’t even ask what they were doing there without grown-ups.
“This has been the best meal of the whole trip,” said Ruby with a satisfied sigh as the waitress cleared their table later. “Don’t you feel grown-up, Flora? Don’t you feel like you belong here in New York?”
“This has really been fun,” said Flora truthfully. She refrained from adding that she was now ready to go back to Camden Falls and King Comma and Daisy Dear and Olivia and Nikki and all her familiar things.
“But you’re ready to go home, aren’t you?” said Ruby. Flora nodded. “I knew it. Well, I’ll be glad to get home, too, I guess. But New York is … magic. I wish I could keep it with me always.”