‘Whatever. Left here,’ he mumbled as I turned out onto the main road. I sensed that the conversation was over and we fell into silence. Keeping my eyes on the road, I felt the quiet purr of the engine beneath my hands. It had been a while since I had driven; and then it was only my mother’s car in the congested centre of Chelsea. I had never driven anything this powerful or expensive, and never on sweeping coast roads either. A jolt of anxiety shot like an electric bolt up my arm as I thought of what Kaspar would do if I got so much as a scratch on his precious ‘baby’; of what he could do. I might have been bitten multiple times but it still terrified me and my breathing hitched as I remembered the pain and the drawing sensation.
I was transported back from my own thoughts as we entered a town, empty and still for the night. I followed the road around until we were trailing the sea again, passing a pier stretching out into the mud flat and eventually the murky waters of the Thames estuary.
‘Where do I—’
‘Head for the Isle of Grain but turn off at the sign for All Hallows. Then head for Low Marshes.’
‘Right,’ I muttered, surprised at his bluntness and sudden change of tone. I risked a glance his way to see that his eyes were fixed out of the window, his brow creased and his lips pursed into a thin line. I frowned.
His head snapped around. ‘What?’
I abruptly turned back to the road, blushing.
The night seemed to be getting darker, the sky losing the glowing halo of orange light the city adored so much. Here, it was clearer and the stars were dotted across the sky, like a child had sprinkled glitter across a dark sheet, only losing its sparkle when the occasional cloud wafted over. The roads were empty and we had already long left the main drag when the road started to narrow. I spotted the sign for Low Marshes and followed the arrow, gradually climbing away from the sea towards the rolling hills of Varnley.
It was strange to think it, but I yearned to be back within the thick walls of the mansion, tucked between cold sheets and inhaling stagnant air. It felt oddly safe – though it was far from – and I began to wonder if I was equating imprisonment with security. At Varnley, I made no decisions. At Varnley, I was just along for the ride.
But when I returned, much as I wanted the day to end, I knew there was a very real possibility that a decision on my humanity could have been made for me by this ‘inter-dimensional council’. That was one choice that should be my own.
And then there was the thought that I had almost kissed Kaspar.
A glare in the mirrors caught my attention. Chasing our tail was a car, headlights on full beam. Unnerved by how close it was getting, I sped up.
The car behind us had dropped back, obviously taking the hint that I liked my space. Kaspar let his head fall against the window again, his fingers rubbing circles around his temples.
Suddenly he sat bolt upright. ‘Slayers,’ he hissed. Then he exploded. ‘Pull over! Get out!’ he roared, but it barely penetrated. ‘Out! Violet, move!’ I did as he ordered. Slayers. ‘I’m driving, get in now!’ Slayers. ‘Violet!’
‘Slayers,’ I breathed. ‘Here …’ The Slayers from my dream. It had to be.
He threw his hands in the air from the opposite side of the car, thumping them down on the roof with a thud. ‘Yes, slayers, here for you, now get around here!’
I thought I was looking at him but all I saw was the dark sky, grey, rolling and dangerous. I thought I was hearing him but all I heard was the howling of the wind as it picked up, rustling the leaves. I thought he was speaking but all I heard was my own voice, quiet and timid compared to the awe of the thunder that had just crashed.
‘Here for me. I could go home …’
A quiet snarl escaped his lips. ‘No.’
‘I could go home and see my friends. I could go to university …’
‘No.’
‘See my family …’
‘No …’
‘See Lily …’
Cool breath tickled my cheeks and mist gathered in my hands as his forehead met mine. His fingers weaved their way between my own and I could feel the damp air swirling between them.
‘I can’t deny you that.’ His eyes swept up to meet mine, grey, colourless, the dull shade of the sky an identical match. He closed them slowly, taking a long, low, raspy breath as he did. ‘I’ll regret this. Violet; Girly. Go home.’
I wrenched away from him. ‘W-what?’
‘Go home. Escape this life that you don’t want.’ His words barely came out a whisper, strained and uncertain.
‘But—’
‘Be human.’
He clutched desperately at my hand as he shakily brought it to his lips, planting a soft kiss on my knuckles. Giving it one last squeeze he placed it back at my side and let go, backing away.
‘Take good care of Lily. Look after her. Don’t let her go.’
His eyes looked glazed, like light shining upon a pond, and for the smallest of moments I wondered if they could be tears – but this was Kaspar. Kaspar would not waste his tears.
‘Just go before I change my mind! Go!’ He yelled, his eyes burning, ash then fire. His taut, gaunt face lit up as the first flash of lightning cut through the mist hanging low above the sea, thunder rumbling not a second behind. Like carefully aimed bullets the second blade set a tree about a mile off ablaze, drums crashing and beating to the rhythm of the storm.
Back-pedalling and stumbling over my own feet, I retreated, not taking my eyes away from his as he scrambled for the handle of the car.
I knew that neither of us had long and fear clutched at my heart, terrified of what the slayers could do to him. But knowing they were after me I weighed up my options: I could go with the slayers or I could make my own way home from wherever we were.
The words of the slayer about cocking his leg over me filled my mind and I knew which I would prefer; I would take a forest full of vampires over them.
Frenetic, my voice was whispering in my mind, calling hurry, hurry, with an urgency I couldn’t ignore. Staring at the trunks of the trees I prepared to delve between, I took one last glance back at Kaspar, frozen, watching me with an expression I had never seen him wear before.
As I met his gaze he turned away and began to slide into his car, the wind howling, whistling what I thought were the words, ‘Goodbye, Violet.’
The thunder rumbled and tears streaked my cheeks, smudging my make-up yet again, eyes sore from where I was rubbing them to see. Tyres screeched as two sets of glaring headlights rounded the corner, ensnaring me like a startled deer. My heart leapt into my mouth as I watched the two cars close in.
This isn’t the right time.
I whirled around and diving towards his car in a few short steps, I wrenched the passenger door open, just as he was firing the engine up. Falling into the seat I yanked the door closed behind me in time to hear Kaspar cursing loudly.
‘What the fuck?’
‘I can’t leave, I just can’t!’ I gasped, spinning around to see the two cars not fifty metres behind us. ‘Oh, my God, oh, my God, they’re right behind us!’
‘Okay, calm down, just put your seatbelt on,’ he instructed, thrusting the car into gear. I didn’t need telling twice and plugged the belt in as I was forced back into the seat, the car accelerating at a speed that had to be illegal. My neck hit the headrest with a sickly click and my hands gripped the edge of the seat like there was no tomorrow, which my mind was screaming at me there would not be if we ploughed into a tree at this speed.
Quit complaining! If you didn’t want to die you would of gone back home to Daddy! my voice screeched in an oddly high-pitched tone, telling me it was as freaked out as I was.
Kaspar’s eyes were constantly flicking between his mirrors, the road and me, alternating between anger, concentration and concern, and self-consciously I reached up to wipe my tears away, but decided I wouldn’t bother as we rounded another corner and my hands flew back to grip the seat.
‘We just need to get to the border
s of Varnley. It’s only a couple of miles,’ he muttered, more to himself than me but I nodded anyway, unable to speak as we powered around a corner, tyres screaming and protesting as the dial inched towards a hundred – an impossible speed for a human to cope with on a normal, nice road, let alone a narrow, winding road with trees like concrete poles each side.
‘What cars are they driving?’ he demanded as we approached a horrific bend, twisted like a hairpin. Spinning the wheel to the right we drifted ungracefully around the corner, earning him a scream on my part as my door passed a tree with eighths of an inch to spare.
‘What cars?’ he repeated, straightening the wheel and causing me to slam into the door.
‘I don’t know, do I?’ I shrieked, barely even glancing in my mirror. ‘It’s bloody dark! Why does it matter anyway? Shouldn’t you be concentrating on the road?’
‘I want to know if we can outrun them,’ he explained, rather too calmly considering the situation. ‘I don’t want to ditch my baby unless I have to.’
‘Right, well …’ I spun in my seat, straining against the belt. ‘They’re black?’
‘Never mind,’ he grunted. ‘Just don’t panic.’
I barely had time to process those words before he had spun around in his seat and was glaring out of the back window, in the opposite direction of what we were speeding towards, hands steering of their own accord.
‘Oh, my fucking—’
The rest of my sentence was drowned out as the engine roared and the car spun out of control around the bend, straight towards the trunk of a gigantic tree.
I screeched as I hit the side of the door again as Kaspar straightened the wheel, thrusting the car up a gear, engine whining. My head throbbed from the impact but I did not dare take my hands off of the seat as I swallowed my guts back down.
‘Alfa Romeo. Two of them,’ Kaspar groaned, flicking his head so his fringe flew out of his eyes.
‘That’s bad?’
‘That’s bad.’
‘How bad?’
‘Very bad. We can’t outrun them. I guess we could keep driving until they broke down though,’ he joked dryly. Just as he spoke there was an almighty roar from right behind us and glancing in the mirror I realized one of the cars was gaining, fast. He pressed down on the throttle and we shot forwards but the car behind only did the same, continuing to close the gap.
‘We’ve only got to get to the border,’ he repeated, slowing down a fraction as we rounded a tight bend and continued to climb. But that fraction was enough; the car behind us sped forward and before I could blink he had drawn level with us. I didn’t dare look in that direction; gut feeling told me that the cruel grin of Giles would face me.
‘No, you don’t!’ Kaspar roared as the slayer’s car drifted towards us. ‘Nobody gets even a single scratch on my baby!’
If I thought we were going fast before, it was nothing compared to the speed we were going now as the roar of engines filled my ears. Screwing my eyes tightly shut I began praying to every deity alive for my life, feeling the car break the peak of a hill and begin soaring downwards.
‘Not much further now … not much further now …’ Kaspar muttered with furious determination, braking hard and taking a sharp left.
‘I’m gonna die, I’m gonna die,’ I whimpered, eyes still shut tight.
‘No, you are not!’ Kaspar grunted and I heard the car change down a gear.
‘I’m gonna die! I don’t want to die!’
‘There, we’re—’
‘I’m going to die, I’m too young to die, I can’t die; I haven’t been to Disneyland yet!’ I cried hysterically, hardly registering the fact that the car had slowed considerably.
‘Vi—’
‘I’m gonna die!’
‘Girly! For the last time, you’re not going to die! We’re back! They’re gone! They can’t get through the border!’ he yelled above my sobs, cutting the engine and slamming his hands down on the steering wheel.
‘Huh?’ I opened my eyes tentatively, beginning to loosen my grip on the leather of the seats. We were indeed back: the floodlights of the garage gleamed off the paintwork of the cars, the comforting howl of the wind as it passed through the hills of Varnley echoing in the distance.
‘They’re gone. It’s okay,’ Kaspar cooed in what he must have thought was a comforting tone.
‘Oh God,’ I muttered, burying my head in my hands, taking deep breaths and attempting not to hyperventilate. ‘Oh God, I think I need a cup of tea.’
FORTY-THREE
Violet
The kettle whistled as I settled gingerly onto a bar stool, letting my head fall into my hands. I was shattered, overwhelmed and the shrill whistling echoed painfully in my head, filling the room with the jingling of the pans hanging on the walls.
Shuddering, but not from the cold, I heard the sound of the gas being killed and felt the steam rising as the water stewed, the vapour tickling the tip of my nose.
Raising myself up onto my elbows I watched as Kaspar ducked down beneath the counter, rummaging in a cupboard for a second, cursing, and then mumbling that he would be back in a minute.
Resting my head back on my arms I listened to the gentle rise of my chest in the unnatural silence, the occasional wisp of smoke escaping from the kettle – the only other sound that my hearing didn’t filter out.
The sound of another’s breath joined mine and I peered through my curtain of hair in time to see Kaspar returning, a dusty bottle of liquor cradled in his arms.
‘Finest Scotch whisky, 1993, and the last bottle in the cellar, so don’t tell Father, he’s rather fond of his spirits.’
And there was me thinking they keep coffins in the wine cellar.
In one fluid moment he unscrewed the cap and took a swig, gulping a ridiculous amount down that would have a human on the floor in seconds – to a vampire it was about as intoxicating as lemonade.
‘I said tea! Not whisky,’ I said, sounding weaker than I had hoped.
He set the bottle down with a clad, eyeing me the whole time. Not bothering to add milk or sugar he passed me the steaming mug, sliding it across the counter that separated us. In a blink he was by my side, bottle in hand and taking the mug straight back from me.
‘Trust me, after the day you’ve had you need a shot of this,’ he said, pouring a copious amount into my tea whilst I watched dubiously. ‘You look like you’ve seen a ghost. And it tastes fine, stop looking so disgusted.’
I took it hesitantly. Taking a large mouthful I almost spat it back out it; it was smoky and combined with the herbal taste of the tea, just plain disgusting. It left my mouth dry as I forced myself to swallow and within seconds I felt burning down my throat, which I was sure had nothing to do with the heat of the tea. The room did a somersault and to stop myself from swaying I focused on Kaspar, who was knocking back the remainder of the bottle whilst settling onto a stool and watching me with vague concern.
I set the almost-full mug down, still feeling like I was spinning. ‘I think I’m just going to leave the rest of that.’ Sliding around to face him, our knees brushing, it didn’t feel like the potent stuff had done Kaspar’s intended job. I rested my chin on my hands, closing my eyes and willing tears not to fall as they stung and threatened to leak, almost beyond my control. ‘God.’
I had made my decision and I felt terrible. I had just abandoned my sick and vulnerable little sister as well as my family and friends, not to mention my education and the promise of a normal, burden-free life.
And what had I chosen instead? A Kingdom full of sick, twisted, manipulative creatures that feasted upon humans, and the Varns’ handsome, if egotistical, fourth son; the very pinnacle upon which this secret world would one day revolve. I must be out of my mind.
Yet the thought that I could have left it all behind still made my heart clench; whether in gladness that I had stayed or in protest that I hadn’t gone was unclear.
I groaned inwardly, collapsing onto the counter, all too aware o
f the figure stifling a snigger beside me; all too aware of the gaze of his striking eyes and the shallow, almost unnecessary rise and fall of his chest that I could just glimpse through the gaps between my strands of hair.
What the hell is happening to me?
I do believe the term applicable here is Stockholm Syndrome, my voice offered, smug, like it knew best. You’ve become indoctrinated. Congratulations.
I’m not a mindless idiot yet, I snapped back and I sensed that if my voice possessed a pair of shoulders, it would be shrugging them.
Not yet.
‘What have I done?’ I asked, not really directing the question at Kaspar, but rather voicing my thoughts aloud. ‘I’ve abandoned Lily. I abandoned her and all for—’
‘For what?’ he cut in sharply. I raised my head from my arms to see that his eyes were grey again. ‘Why didn’t you go? You had a chance to be free but you just came running back!’ With his change of tone, all feelings of confusion fled as something far more sinister crept in, clawing and dragging at my chest.
‘You’re angry,’ I murmured in a perfectly flat tone, sliding off the stool and drawing myself close to him. He got up and folded his arms across his chest, creating space between us as I closed the gap. ‘Why are you angry, Kaspar? You got what you wanted, didn’t you? A human pet for a bit longer. Someone to torment and play with, to muck up and break like you do with everyone else, because you just can’t take the fact that you’re hurting inside. Just like your father.’
Even as the words flowed from my lips I could not believe I was saying them, but I knew that I couldn’t stop now. How dare he be angry? What does he have to be angry about?
Nothing betrayed his emotions but the cool emerald of his eyes, frustratingly unaffected. His gaze followed me as I stopped with my face level to his chest, looking down and perceiving me through a gaze that could be used to scold a naughty child. His voice was slow and measured, like I needed the concept of his anger explained to me as though I was that ill-behaved child.