He knew what the answer was. He would lose Squirrel -flight forever if she found out. What else might he lose as well? Tigerstar had been stripped of his deputyship and sent into exile when Firestar uncovered his plot to kill Bluestar. Would the same thing happen to Brambleclaw if his meetings with Hawkfrost and Tigerstar were revealed?
Brambleclaw tried to tell himself that no cat could ever uncover his secret, but he shivered in the warm sunlight of greenleaf. I’m not planning to kill any cat, he told himself. All he wanted was to make ThunderClan strong again. His Clanmates had been without a deputy for too long; now they had one, and Brambleclaw knew he would do anything to justify StarClan’s faith in him.
Chapter 19
As Leafpool set out for her meeting at the Moonpool, her pelt still prickled with uneasiness. Brambleclaw’s first day as deputy had gone well; he gave orders with quiet authority and he worked harder than any cat on his own patrols. But she couldn’t forget her vision of Tigerstar shadowing him as Firestar announced that he would be deputy. Somehow, she knew, Brambleclaw was still in contact with his murderous father. And that meant the whole Clan could be in danger.
Hoping for a sign when she shared tongues with StarClan at the Moonpool, she padded through the forest and emerged from the trees near the stream where it gurgled around the stepping-stones. Barkface and Mothwing were waiting for her, and in the twilight Leafpool could just make out the shape of another, smaller cat—Willowpaw! Leafpool had forgotten that this was the night when the young grey she-cat would be officially received by StarClan as Moth wing’s apprentice.
“Hi,” she meowed, bounding up to them. “Willowpaw, it’s great to see you.”
Willowpaw ducked her head shyly. Her eyes shone; she looked almost too excited to speak. “Hi, Leafpool,” she mewed. “It’s great to be here.”
To Leafpool’s relief the apprentice didn’t mention the dream they had shared about finding the catmint. Barkface might overhear, and he would think it very strange that another Clan’s medicine cat had to guide Mothwing’s apprentice.
“Where’s Littlecloud?” Leafpool asked. “He isn’t usually late.”
Barkface shrugged. “No idea. He may have gone ahead.”
“We’d better get on. The moon will be up soon,” Mothwing added.
Leafpool could see tension in every hair of her friend’s pelt. She could understand why. Mothwing was about to present her apprentice to StarClan when she herself didn’t believe in them. She must be terrified of what would happen. Perhaps StarClan wouldn’t even accept Willowpaw when her mentor couldn’t reach them.
No, Leafpool comforted herself. Feathertail came to Willowpaw in my dream, and promised her she would have lots more dreams of StarClan.
She wished she could comfort Mothwing, but in front of Barkface she couldn’t even admit that the problem existed.
The four cats had just crossed the ThunderClan border when a yowl sounded behind them and Littlecloud raced up to them.
“Sorry,” he panted. “Cedarheart turned up with a thorn in his paw just as I was about to leave. Welcome,” he added, dipping his head to Willowpaw. “Don’t be nervous about tonight. You’ll be fine; you’ve got a great mentor.”
Mothwing said nothing, but Leafpool didn’t miss the flash of panic in her eyes.
The moon floated high in the sky by the time the medicine cats pushed their way through the barrier of bushes and stood at the top of the hollow. Willowpaw stared in delight at the silver stream pouring down the rock in front of her, and the bubbling Moonpool that seemed to be full of starlight.
“It’s so beautiful!” she whispered.
Barkface took the lead down the dimpled path to the waterside. Mothwing followed with Willowpaw just behind her, while Leafpool and Littlecloud went last.
Beside the pool, Mothwing turned and faced her apprentice. “Willowpaw,” she meowed, “is it your wish to enter into the mysteries of StarClan as a medicine cat?” Whatever she believed privately, she knew the words for this ritual well enough—and sounded as if she meant every one of them, too.
Willowpaw’s grey fur, turned to silver in the moonlight, was fluffed out in excitement and she held her tail high. Her eyes were filled with awe as she replied solemnly, “It is.”
“Then come forward.”
Willowpaw padded up to her until both cats stood on the very edge of the Moonpool. Mothwing raised her head to gaze at Silverpelt; Leafpool wondered what she saw there. Her voice was high-pitched and almost shaking as she went on with the ceremony; she looked more nervous than her apprentice.
“Warriors of StarClan, I present to you this apprentice. She has chosen the path of a medicine cat. Grant her your wisdom and insight so that she may understand your ways and heal her Clan in accordance with your will.”
Leafpool’s heart twisted with pity for her friend, recognising what each word was costing her. Every day she lived a lie, but this was worse than anything else, to call on starry spirits she did not believe in where all the other medicine cats could hear her.
Mothwing waved her tail at Willowpaw. “Crouch down and drink from the pool.”
Blinking, Willowpaw obeyed her. Her mentor and the rest of the medicine cats took their own places around the edge of the pool, and stretched out to lap up a few drops of the silvery water.
To Leafpool it tasted like liquid starshine, icy cold, piercing her to the bone. As the drops touched her tongue she sank into darkness; for a few heartbeats she seemed to float in nothingness.
Then her eyes opened and she found herself crouched on the edge of a pool whose waters glimmered with the reflection of Silverpelt. But it was not the Moonpool. It lay in a forest clearing; ferns and flowers grew around the edge and studded the grass, shining with a pale light.
Leafpool gazed upward, tasting the cold night air with the wild scent of wind and stars. She felt as if only the tiniest leap would carry her into the sky, to share tongues with StarClan in their own territory.
Then above her head she saw the three tiny stars that she had seen twice before. They seemed to shine more brightly than ever.
Beside Leafpool, Willowpaw was curled up asleep, and on the opposite side of the pool sat a beautiful tortoiseshell shecat, her eyes glowing softly as she gazed at the apprentice.
“Spottedleaf!” Leafpool exclaimed.
She raced up to the starry spirit, drinking in the familiar sweet scent, and pressed herself against Spottedleaf’s soft tortoiseshell flank. “I’m so glad to see you. Can you tell me about those three stars?” She pointed upward with her tail. “I would think they’d mean that three warriors have died, but I can’t figure out who it would be!”
Spottedleaf shook her head. “The stars are a sign, dear one. But this is not the time for you to discover their meaning.”
Leafpool opened her mouth to protest. But she knew that StarClan were wiser than she was, and they would tell her what she needed to know at the proper time. Swallowing her disappointment, she mewed instead, “At least you shared Mothwing’s secret with me, about the moth’s wing sign. Thank you.”
“I thought it was time for you to know,” Spottedleaf told her. “You’re a good friend to her, and she will need your support.”
“I haven’t talked to her about it yet,” Leafpool mewed. “Do you think I should?”
Spottedleaf gave her ear a warm, affectionate lick. “Not unless you want to—or unless Mothwing speaks of it herself. Just reassure her that she can be a great medicine cat and that she deserves to keep her place among her Clanmates.”
“That’s not hard,” Leafpool meowed. “Mothwing is a great medicine cat. No cat could care more for her Clan than she does. She hates what Hawkfrost is trying to make her do.”
Spottedleaf nodded and a shadow touched her beautiful eyes. “Hawkfrost’s destiny is in the paws of StarClan,” she murmured. “He is not your concern.”
She rose and padded around the pool with Leafpool following, until they stood over the sleeping apprentice.
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“StarClan are grateful to you,” Spottedleaf went on, “for the help you’re giving Willowpaw. She will need you as much as Mothwing if she is to grow into a full medicine cat. I know you’ll keep your part of her training a secret—you have already proved you can stay silent.”
“Thank you, Spottedleaf,” Leafpool meowed, grateful for the StarClan cat’s trust. She hesitated and then went on, “I wish I could see Cinderpelt. She never comes to me, and I miss her so much! Are you sure she isn’t angry with me?”
Spottedleaf nuzzled the top of Leafpool’s head, making her feel like a kit again, secure in the nursery with her mother. “Quite certain. Stop worrying about Cinderpelt, dear one. She is closer to you than you know. Would you like me to prove it to you?”
Leafpool blinked. “Oh, Spottedleaf, if only you could!”
Spottedleaf bent her head to lap from the glittering water and twitched her ears to tell Leafpool to do the same. Awe shivered through Leafpool from ears to tail-tip. She bent her head and lapped a few drops. This was not the icy water of the Moonpool that would sweep her into dreams. Instead, it was cool and fragrant with the scents of healing herbs. Leafpool felt as though it were soaking into every part of her body, giving her strength and courage.
“Now follow me,” Spottedleaf directed.
Leafpool padded in the other cat’s paw steps across the clearing and into the trees. Suddenly she realised that she was back in her own familiar forest, with the thorn barrier to the ThunderClan camp looming up in front of her.
“Why have you brought me here?” she asked.
Spottedleaf did not reply. She led the way through the thorn tunnel and across the camp to the nursery. Close to the entrance, Daisy was lying among her kits, all of them curled up and deeply asleep. Leafpool edged past them lightly.
The former medicine cat led her to the far corner of the nursery, where Sorreltail was sleeping. Her four kits were nuzzling close to her belly. Three of them slept, but as Leafpool watched, Cinderkit raised her head and blinked open blue eyes, fixing Leafpool with such an intense, familiar gaze that she could not look away.
“Now do you understand?” Spottedleaf purred.
“It . . . it can’t be true,” Leafpool whispered. “Why . . . how?”
“It is true,” Spottedleaf assured her. “Do you feel better knowing this?”
“Oh, yes!” Leafpool breathed out. “Thank you, Spottedleaf.”
“Now we must go back,” Spottedleaf mewed. “It’s time to make Willowpaw into a true medicine cat.”
Cinderkit’s jaws gaped in a huge yawn, showing a pink tongue and tiny sharp teeth. Her eyes closed again and she nestled into her mother’s fur. Leafpool bent her head until the kit’s fluffy grey fur tickled her nose and she could drink in her warm kit scent, then turned and followed Spottedleaf out of the nursery. Goodbye, Cinderpelt, she thought as the thorn branches closed up behind her.
Somehow, as they left the camp, they crossed the boundary again into the dream forest. Willowpaw was still sleeping beside the pool. Spottedleaf padded up to her and breathed softly into her ear. The apprentice blinked awake and raised her head, gazing up at the former medicine cat.
“You’re a StarClan warrior, aren’t you?” she mewed. “I can see the stars in your fur.”
“I am, small one. My name is Spottedleaf. And here is your friend Leafpool.”
Willowpaw scrambled to her paws. “Hi, Leafpool. Isn’t Mothwing with you?” she added, glancing around.
“No, you will not see her in this dream,” Spottedleaf replied.
A stab of discomfort pierced Leafpool at the thought that Mothwing wasn’t here to see her apprentice taking her first steps in the world of StarClan. But some cat must do it, she told herself. Mothwing can’t and StarClan has chosen me.
“Where are we? Why are we here?” Willowpaw asked. She whirled around, trying to take in all the clearing in one glance.
“We’ve come to share a sign from StarClan with you,” Spottedleaf answered. “Are you ready?”
Willowpaw’s eyes shone. “Yes!” She gave a little bounce, reminding Leafpool of the kit she had been not long ago. “Oh, this is so exciting! I never had dreams like this before I was apprenticed.”
“You will have many more,” Spottedleaf told her. “Wherever your paws lead you, you will never be alone.”
Spottedleaf gestured with her tail for Willowpaw to lap from the pool. She crouched beside the apprentice, gazing into the depths; Leafpool took her place on Willowpaw’s other side.
“What do you see?” Spottedleaf asked.
The water was flat, reflecting the stars above. Then gradually their light was blotted out, and Leafpool realised she could see grey clouds churning beneath the surface. A fierce cold wind sprang up, rattling the trees and gouging the surface of the pool. It buffeted Leafpool’s fur until she dug her claws deep into the earth, terrified of being swept away. She heard Willowpaw let out a frightened cry.
“Don’t be afraid!” Spottedleaf’s meow rose above the rushing of the wind. “Nothing here will harm you.”
Leafpool squeezed her eyes tight shut as the wind blew so hard, she felt her claws being tugged out of the ground. And then she was blinking awake on the edge of the Moonpool, her heart still pounding. Above her, the moon floated in a clear sky, with not even the faintest breeze to chase the clouds or disturb the surface of the pool. Willowpaw was crouched beside the water, her eyes closed, her breathing light and shallow. Further round the pool, Littlecloud and Barkface still walked in dreams. Mothwing sat on the other side of Willowpaw, her paws together with her tail wrapped around them. She was gazing at the starry water with such anguish in her eyes that Leafpool thought her heart would break with sympathy.
“Mothwing,” she murmured, pushing aside her vision of the storm.
Mothwing turned to look at her. “I’m so afraid,” she whispered. “Do you think she’ll have the right sort of dream? How can she be a medicine cat when her mentor doesn’t believe in StarClan?”
Leafpool rose and skirted the sleeping apprentice to draw close to her friend and give her a few warm licks around her ear. “Spottedleaf came to her,” she reassured Mothwing. “I was there. I saw her too.”
Mothwing shook her head. “It was just a dream.”
Leafpool pressed against her, trying to strengthen her with the certainty of her own belief. “You’ll see. Everything will be fine.”
Mothwing jerked away from her. “No, no, it can’t be. Oh, Leafpool, I can’t go on lying any longer! I have to tell you.” She fixed huge amber eyes on Leafpool. “You think StarClan chose me, but they didn’t. The moth’s wing outside Mudfur’s den wasn’t a sign from them. Hawkfrost put it there, but I promise you, Leafpool, I promise, I didn’t know about it until afterwards.”
Leafpool gazed at her. Warmth flooded through her at the thought that her friend trusted her enough to tell her the truth. Following it came icy terror. Oh, StarClan, give me the right words!
As Leafpool hesitated, Mothwing shrank back. “What are you going to do?” she whimpered. “Will you tell the others? Will I have to stop being a medicine cat?”
“Of course not.” Leafpool pressed against her friend again, touching her nose to her ear. “Mothwing, I already knew.”
Mothwing’s eyes stretched even wider. “You knew? How?”
“Spottedleaf sent me a sign. And . . . and I heard Hawkfrost talking to you after the last Gathering.”
“Hawkfrost!” Mothwing’s tone was bitter. “He keeps threatening to tell every cat unless I do what he wants. He made me lie at the Gathering. I never had that dream—but you know that too, don’t you?”
Leafpool nodded.
“I wanted to be a medicine cat so much! And at first I tried to believe in StarClan, I really did. When Mudfur took me to the Moonstone I thought I had a dream where I met some cats from StarClan, and they showed me things that were happening in the forest. Then when I got back to RiverClan, Hawkfrost told me what he’d
done with the moth’s wing. And I realised that StarClan must be just a story and that everything I had seen was only an ordinary dream. Because if StarClan really existed, they wouldn’t let him do such a wicked thing or torment me like this!”
Leafpool stroked Mothwing’s shoulder with the tip of her tail. Her insides churned with anger, but she fought to hide it from her friend. Now she knew she had been right to mistrust Hawkfrost. He had destroyed his sister’s faith, crippling her as a medicine cat when she had so much to offer with her healing skills.
“It’s all right,” she murmured. “Believe me, all will be well.”
“How can it?” Mothwing protested. “I should have told every cat the truth right away. But I couldn’t give up being a medicine cat. I love healing so much and I wanted to help my Clanmates. And now it’s too late. If I tell them what happened, they’ll drive me out, and I’ve nowhere else to go.”
“You don’t have to go anywhere,” Leafpool promised. “Spottedleaf told me that StarClan want you to stay where you are and do what you’ve always done. She said you can be a great medicine cat and you deserve your place at the Moonpool.”
For a heartbeat hope flared in Mothwing’s eyes, as if she wanted to believe what Leafpool told her. Then she shook her head. “It’s kind of you to say that, but I know it isn’t true. Oh, I don’t think you’re lying,” she added hastily, “but it was just a dream.” She sighed. “But if you really think I should, I’ll carry on. Only, how am I going to mentor Willowpaw properly? I don’t know what to tell her about StarClan.”
“But I do,” Leafpool pointed out. “I’ll teach her what she needs to know about them and walk with her in dreams. And you can show her all the herbs and how to use them. She’ll be a wonderful apprentice.”
Mothwing’s head drooped. “I don’t deserve her,” she whispered. After a moment she lifted her head again, a new determination in her eyes. “But I’m going to try. I won’t listen to Hawkfrost any more. I’ll remind him that no cat would ever make him deputy if they knew he’d lied about a sign from StarClan.”