She shook her head and looked at Krystal. “Hard for me to imagine.”
“Me, too. I could barely stand mine, and they hated me.”
Anne put her chin on her steepled hands. “You all knew more than me. I didn’t see the evil. I wasn’t thrilled with things. I mean, I thought I was weird. The guards, even my own, called me that.”
I tried, and failed, to imagine any of Anne’s loving husbands calling her weird. She kept speaking. “I knew I didn’t want to order them to have sex with me. I knew I didn’t like the beatings. But I was raised to believe we were better off than the regular population, I should be grateful, and that my mom disgraced the family. I didn’t question things until I met Daniella.”
The older woman answered. “I’ve been waiting for all of you. After I was taken away and forced into captivity, when that was over, I came to believe I’d had these experiences so I could help all of you when you joined me. I knew there would be others, there would be more, there would be purpose. That I wasn’t the only one who would love my guards more than myself.”
“Mika told Katrina she was leaving,” Krystal spoke up, “which made me brave, and I said I would, too. She jumped to her feet, uttered something in a language I couldn’t understand, and that was that... I woke up here.”
I shook my head. “Somewhere between there and here something happened. The question is, what?” My resolve hardened. I was going back to Katrina’s false Sisterhood, and I wouldn’t be leaving until I was done with her.
* * *
The clock had struck two in the morning. I slept between Aidan and Brody. The former lay flat on his back with his mouth open, a slight snore sounding. He was out cold. I couldn’t rest. Eric was on my mind, and since I hadn’t seen him before we all went to bed, I had no doubt that he wasn’t sleeping either.
I’d given him a task. He was doing it, despite the fact that it was the middle of the night. I slipped out of the bed, Aidan’s hand coming to grab my arm before I was fully away. He opened an eye. “Okay?”
I knelt down. “Worrying about Eric.”
He made a sound in his throat. “Let me walk you over to find him.”
I smoothed his hair off his forehead. “It’s safe here. My powers are off. It’s okay. You’ll feel it if I’m not. Sleep.”
He shrugged. “Sorry, that’s not how this works.”
Aidan dragged himself out of bed and shoved on his shoes. We walked out into the quiet of the house together. I really would have been perfectly fine. But he was right. That wasn’t how this worked.
His hands were rough, callused. They always had been. I brought one to my mouth and kissed his fingers. He responded by gently pressing his forehead to the top of my skull. I really loved that man.
I didn’t know for sure where Eric was, but I thought it a good guess I would find him in the library, and I was right. He poured over books and didn’t even glance up when I came in the room. Aidan didn’t follow but left me at the door, closing it gently in front of himself.
I walked on quiet feet to Eric and stopped right in front of him. He was so handsome. A low light illuminated his high cheekbones and almond-shaped eyes. He leaned back in the chair, his mouth moving, pursing before he bit on his lower lip. His gaze moved quickly over the book.
I touched his cheek, and his eyes darted up to mine. “Teagan.” He shook his head. “What are you doing here?”
I took the book out of his hand and laid it down on the desk. “Couldn’t shut my mind off from thinking about you.”
“I...”
I leaned over and kissed him gently on the lips. “Eric, I love you. I want you. Not just your brain. Is it terrible of me? I crave your body.”
Heat passed between us. For a second, it was a real palpable entity in the room with us, like we wanted each other so much that we’d created an actual spark of warmth that now we had to expel or we might explode.
I straddled him on the chair, my knee hitting the back of it. When we stood, Eric was significantly taller than me. But as we were, on my knees, I looked down at him. He ran his hand down his neck, stroking me from the chin to the top of my chest. “Teagan, you have always been so beautiful.”
I shook my head. “I don’t care about physical beauty, at least not when it comes to me. Truth of the matter is, I get to admire you every day, I pale in comparison.”
“I...”
Not sure of what he was going to say, and not wanting to argue about which one of us was more attractive, I took his hands and placed them on my breasts. His eyes widened, and he squeezed them gently.
I raised an eyebrow. “Like that?”
He flared his nostrils. “I do. I really do.”
“You might like the shirt off even better.”
I pulled it over my head, showing him my bare breasts. My nipples ached, begging for his attention. He bent his head to suck on the left one, and as the pleasure hit me, I dug my hands into the skin exposed on his back.
He moaned, and I shuddered against him. Eric sucked harder. I’d be sore tomorrow, every slight bit of pain reminding me what we did here. I pulled on his shirt until I had it over his head. He roamed his hands up and down my back before he picked up his mouth and made love to my other nipple.
“Oh, you sweet man.”
He pushed my back against the desk, giving us only enough space that he could remove my pajama bottoms. He gripped my buttocks to pull me closer to him. I met his mouth, kissing him hard. Eric was frantic, his hands were everywhere he could reach.
I cupped him, his cock warm even through his pants.
“Teagan.” He bit down on my shoulder. “When I thought you were dead, I thought I’d never have this again in this life. I thought I’d never wake up with you in my arms.”
I lightly bit his bottom lip. “Don’t think about that now. I’m here. I’ll always be here with you.” I undid his pants, letting them drop to the floor, followed by his briefs. Eric was long, hard, and ready for me. Still, if I took him inside of me right away, we’d be done too soon.
I cupped his balls, and he squirmed. “Careful.”
I shook my head, naughtiness making me feel brave and sexy. “I don’t want to be careful.”
He leaned back in the chair. “You’re going to kill me.”
“The best possible death.” I kissed him while I stroked him, moving my tongue in the same rhythm as my hand. He throbbed against my fingers. I did want him inside of me, badly.
I let go of him, using his shoulders to hoist myself up a bit, so I could press my pussy down on top of his cock. His head fell backward, his eyes hooded. “Lovely. So. Warm.”
He gripped my hips, and I took that as a sign to move up and down. I only kept the tip of his dick inside of me before I pushed hard until he was balls deep. Shivers of pleasure wrecked me. Each movement made me moan. Eric jerked his hips rubbing against my clit.
“Sweet.” He half-laughed, half-groaned. “The sounds you make. So sweet.”
I shuddered. His words were an incredible aphrodisiac. “I love how you love me, Eric.”
We ceased to speak. Our movements became a dance, rhythmic. He pressed; I pushed. Soon we were both calling out over and over again. I was close, and so was he. I was never going to view this chair or desk the same way. Anyone could come in, and I didn’t care.
I exploded around him, my body suddenly becoming languid. If he hadn’t been holding me, I would have fallen over. He pulsated deep inside of me, emptying himself until we were both spent and clinging to each other.
Eric pulled himself out of me and picked me up in order to put me down on the chair by myself. He swept his arm across the desk, letting all the books fall onto the floor. I was back in his arms before I could blink, and we both lay down on top of the desk.
I rolled against him, slinging my arm over him. His heart beat. This was a perfect moment. We had so few of them. He hummed in the back of his throat.
“So glad I got up to come find you.”
He
nodded. “Me, too. Remind me to stay up too late researching every night.”
I smiled. “You were so handsome sitting there, lost in whatever you were reading.”
“Teagan”—he shifted so we could look at each other—“Katrina didn’t kill you because it would end her. A Sister ending a Sister ends in the death of a Sister.”
I jolted upward, almost falling off the desk. “What?”
“If a Sister kills a Sister, they both die. She can’t kill you. It’s why she didn’t kill Anne. It’s why she didn’t kill Daniella. Or you. Any of you.” He leaned up on his elbows.
“We never learned that.” How could they have left such a basic piece of our education out? “Clearly Katrina knows.”
He kissed my cheek. “She has her own agenda.”
“I guess it’s a good thing I never killed any of my Sisters.”
Eric’s eyes were closing, but he exhaled loudly and rolled off the desk. He collected our clothes and handed me mine. We dressed quietly. Finally, he spoke again. “You could never kill anyone.”
“I could. If they were harming you.” I didn’t even hesitate when I spoke. That was how strongly I believed what I said. I would kill for any of the five of them.
He touched the side of my cheek. “Don’t kill a Sister for me. Not ever. If you kill Katrina, we’ll lose you. I can’t have that.”
I pressed my head to his chest. “Someday, even if we live to be old, we’ll lose each other. We have the benefit of knowing that we’ll be together again. Most people will never have our certainty.”
He hugged me tightly. “I already went years without you. That was too long, period.”
* * *
When I got back to the bedroom, Eric in tow, Aidan wasn’t in the bed. I climbed into it, letting Eric scoot in next to me, which placed me between Eric and Brody. I wondered if my Five knew I had left. He muttered something and swung an arm around me. I closed my eyes. This was home. I’d never felt as complete as I finally did. All five of them were warm and nestled in my heart, connected through our links.
Sleep came easily.
In my dream, I was in the future that I kept aiming for. The noise was intense. I looked all around. A speeding train whizzed by me, and the ground seemed to shake. I was encased all around, as though in a tunnel. Was I underground?
The lights buzzed and flashed. They hurt my eyes. This was my future, so why did I hate it so much? What was that smell?
Katrina walked toward me, a dark figure looming behind. What was she doing in this place? This didn’t belong to her. She shouldn’t be able to see it. In real life, both she and I should be long dead. We didn’t belong in that time.
“Did you think you were the only person who could see this?” She raised her eyes, circling me. “Sister Teagan, I’m surprised by your naiveté. There are many forces at play. Yours are not the only ones who have a stake in this, and I do not mean the demons. Think of me, as you will. I cannot control that but I, too, was chosen. I, too, was given a role.”
I leaned forward, ignoring the demon walking beside her. “You are the pretender.”
She raised a dark, perfect eyebrow. I was always a mess, and Katrina was always beautiful. When it came down to it, her outside beauty did not match the inside. She was a false carrier.
“I am not a pretender. Perhaps you are the pretender. Perhaps Anne is. Did you ever consider who might be lying to you? Driving this forward?”
I raised my eyebrows. “Are you suggesting the demons are playing a game?”
“I’m not suggesting anything. Ask yourself why they would have made me a Sister if I was so wrong? I am powerful and in charge. Your precious birds helped choose me, too.”
I stepped away from her. Even in whatever this was—dream, vision, alternative reality—her power was palpable. It pushed against my own. “Mistakes happen. We are fully capable of making bad ones, of screwing up the destinies they’ve set up for us.”
“Or maybe you were manipulated into having the wrong destiny.”
There was one problem with her logic. “You tried to take my guards from me. You had me locked in a mine. You’re never going to convince me you’re not a manipulative, evil woman.”
I sat straight up in bed. Had that been a dream or was it… something else? I didn’t know. That wasn’t a real future, it was a state Katrina had trapped us both in. Why had she bothered? And what was that thing behind her? She’d not even made motion toward it.
Brody’s eyes flew open. He touched my arm. “You okay?”
“Did I wake you?” That was a silly question. I’d obviously disturbed him.
My quietest guard shook his head. “No, love. I felt like you needed me.” He kissed my nose. “Bad dream?”
“Do you think it might be possible that Katrina was somehow in my head?”
He blinked rapidly. “I hope not, but we can’t be foolish. If something happened, we should all speak about it.”
He was right. Eric mumbled something and moved his hand on my stomach slightly. I nodded to Brody. “In the morning.”
“First thing.”
I didn’t fall back asleep for the rest of the night, and I was pretty sure that although Brody was quiet, he was awake, too. I lay in the darkness, listening to Eric breathe. If this woman—this nightmare in human flesh—could get to us when we rested, we were in big trouble.
Dawn passed through my window, bringing a new day. What would happen? Would there come a time when I would wake and believe that the most pressing thing I had to worry about was what to make us all to eat? Or was that life for other people?
I was a Sister. The Prophet. And I’d chosen this existence. I had to learn to live with it.
15
“We know she can get in our heads.” Mika pointed at her own. “She did something to both Krystal and me.”
In affirmation, Krystal nodded her head. “I agree. But what Sister Teagan is describing is different.” Krystal still hadn’t quite adjusted to dropping the Sister from the address when she spoke to me. That was fine. I’d call her Sister Krystal if that was what she preferred. “She said some spell or words or whatever and messed with our heads. All Sister Teagan did was go to bed.”
Daniella sighed. “There is nothing too low for Katrina to do. She must be feeling very threatened if she did that. Can you imagine the level of power she had to use to push into your head like that? She must be exhausted today. It’s too bad we’re not there right now. We could ambush her.”
Anne had been very quiet but she spoke now. “And do what? We’ve learned we can’t kill her—thank Eric for us, please, Teagan. Even if we could, I couldn’t kill anyone. I mean, I could. If they were threatening my son or my husbands or, honestly, any of you. But I couldn’t walk into Katrina’s office and end her life.”
I squeezed her hand, where it lay on the table. “She’s your aunt. No one would expect you to kill your aunt.”
She smiled at me. “It’s not because she’s my aunt. It’s because… I can’t explain it. Life is sacred to me. There’s so much death. So many demons running around ending people’s lives before they’ve even began. Even Katrina’s soul has value.”
“You’re too kind.” Daniella rose, her hands on her hips. “That is why they made you Sister Superior and me… well, whatever I am.”
Affection for Daniella rushed through me. “You’re our teacher. There’s a word for that. We used to call the Sisters who taught us at the other Sisterhood our Madame. You’re our Madame.”
Anne, Mika, and Krystal all banged on the table with their knuckles. I smiled at the gesture. That was essentially saying hear, hear to my statement. The knocking was an old tradition but one I’d always liked. Not all things that came from our old world was terrible. Some of them were real, passed down by divinity and hadn’t been corrupted. We had to start establishing these things into our lives here. The thought reminded me of several things I needed to say that had nothing to do with Katrina having—maybe or maybe not—bee
n in my mind.
“As far as I can tell, we have three major goals we need to accomplish here. Anne, my role is to advise you, so stop me if I’m out of line.”
Anne shook her head. “Please, I’m so new to this, and there are lots of things I should be thinking about. I get so caught up in the day-to-day, like why we don’t have consistent hot water. Why don’t we have consistent hot water?”
Mika snorted. “Because we live in the time of apocalypse and things are just miserably hard?”
“Well, that, obviously.” Anne groaned before she laughed. “Sorry, Teagan, go on. Daniella, would you mind sitting? Let’s hear what Teagan thinks. Are these visions or just opinions?”
That was a good question and exactly the one she should be asking me. “Just opinions, but anytime you want me to open my powers, they are here for your use.”
Krystal steepled her fingers. “This is so bizarre.”
That might be true, but we had to walk through these matters, weird or otherwise.
Anne sat back in her chair. “Well, let’s hear the opinions, and then, depending on what I decide, we’ll move from there to visions.”
Fair enough. “I think that first and foremost our mission never changes. It’s to help people as they need us. Now, of course, there are too many people who could use our help and not enough of us to give it. That being said, we don’t stop trying. First off, we have to find Krystal and Mika’s guards.”
Krystal sucked in her breath. “I hold you all in deep regard and gratitude. But I hated my guards. They were not nice to me, and I certainly didn’t want to marry mine like you ladies have. I don’t ever want to see them again.”
Anne shook her head. “That is because Katrina made things wrong.”
“And, I’m not married to my guards. I wish I was. They’ve never asked me.”
Daniella shook her head. “They love you more than they love the air they breathe. They probably consider themselves married to you. Or even more than that, somehow eternally devoted. Ask them. Don’t get hung up on nonsense.”