I pull back, confused as hell about where this conversation just went.
"Yes?"
"Yes, baby. It would have been a lot easier if you would have let me buy a ring and get down on my knee to ask...but hey, what's one more thing we do our own way? That's just one of the things I love about you, Asher James Cooper. You march to the beat of your own drum."
Well I'll be dammed.
"Did you just propose to me, woman?" I try to scowl, but she just smiles brighter.
That damn light that erases my darkness is shining so bright that I'm convinced that, in this moment, she's wholly chased all of my demons from the past away. The grin that takes over my face is so large that I can feel my cheeks burning.
Damn, I'm one lucky man.
"Uh, baby...I did not propose to you. I answered your stuttering attempt at one to me. Just beat you to the punch," she giggles, and that sound shoots straight through me. My heart feels like it's so full it could burst. "Do I at least get to see my ring?"
"Come here, you beautifully perfect, smartass woman of mine. Let me do this right."
She swiftly closes the distance between us, almost tripping over her feet in order to do so.
I take a deep breath--not for courage, but because I can smell her delectable scent. Closing my eyes and picturing her beautiful face makes no sense since the real thing is right in front of me. Opening my eyes, I lean forward and give her a soft kiss. Her eyes start to water when I fold myself down to one knee and reach up to frame her stomach, giving our boy a nuzzle with my nose, a quick 'I love you,' and kiss. I grab one of her hands--the left one--pull the ring out of my pocket, and place it on her finger.
"Chelcie Nicole Avery. The day you walked into my life, I knew I would forever crave your light. You've taught me so much. I don't look for the bad in everyone anymore. I see beauty in everything around me. I look forward to waking up with you pushed close to my body and my hand resting against our son. You've given me back a life I didn't know I was close to losing. A second chance that I needed to be the man you believe I am. Every day, I wake up and want to do everything I can to prove to you that I am that man. You're my everything, Sunshine. You've made me whole again." I lean forward and kiss her finger that has my ring shining bright. Just like her, its light reminds me once again how much this woman means to me. "I love you, Chelcie, and it would make me the happiest man on Earth if you would marry me. Be my person for the rest of our lives."
Her smile hasn't slipped, and for once, I don't even bother trying to stop the tears. I can feel some of my own starting to burn at the back of my throat.
"Yes! God, yes!" she sobs. "I love you so much, baby."
I shiver when she calls me that. Every single time. It's like a drug for me. She calls me baby and I want to drop to my knees and offer her the world.
"I love you too, Sunshine."
Chapter 26 - Chelcie
Asher just left the bed to grab me some water. My throat is burning--in a good way--from screaming his name so many times. He didn't waste a second. I said yes, and the next thing I knew, I was in his arms while he charged through the apartment. A man on a mission. He took me hard the first time, both of us needing it. The second time was slow and sweet--and if you asked me, I would swear the Earth moved.
We still need to talk, but right now, with my heart this full, I couldn't stop smiling if I tried.
"What's that smile all about?" he inquires from the side of the bed.
I roll my head and take in every fine-as-hell inch of his tan skin. His muscles are bulging, and a fine sheen of sweat covers his body. His cock is still semierect, and I smirk wickedly when I see him start to swell under my gaze.
"You're so damn fine," I sigh.
He laughs, hands me the water, and walks over to the bathroom. I admire his backside as he walks, each firm globe flexing as he strolls lazily.
"Damn," I hiss.
He turns and gives me a sinful smirk before stepping into the bathroom and out of my line of sight. I take a deep pull of the ice-cold water he brought me before setting it down on the nightstand.
"Lean back and spread 'em," he rumbles when he walks back up to the side of the bed.
I gape at him for a second. Then he holds up the washcloth in his hands with a wink.
"Someone sure is thinking some naughty thoughts. You need a spanking, Sunshine? Have you been a bad girl?"
My pussy convulses at his words. He's spanked me a few times--when things got rough--and each time, I came harder than the last.
Damn, I love this man.
I lean back, making a slow show of spreading my legs. "I might be pregnant, but last time I checked, my arms still work, baby. I think I'm capable of cleaning my own body."
"And you would deny me this? Baby, seeing my come falling out of your tight cunt is probably one of the hottest things I've seen. I'm inside you, and my come is marking your body as mine. There isn't anything more arousing. Well, maybe there is--but this... Fuck, you have no idea."
After he finishes wiping every inch of my pussy, my legs are quivering with the strength of holding back my orgasm. How embarrassing is it that I'm seconds away from exploding and all he's doing is wiping me off.
He looks up from where his head has been leaning in while he was cleaning me off, noticing the heat in my eyes and I'm sure the blush that covers my skin. His eyebrow cocks and that lethal grin takes over his lips. Without breaking eye contact, he leans forward and gives me one long lick of his warm tongue. Lifting up, I'm confused for a breath of a second, and then I feel his hand pop down on my pussy. His fingers hit with just enough pressure against my swollen nerves that I throw my head back and scream. My eyes roll back in my head, my toes curl, and I gasp with the power of this orgasm. My whole body is blazing white hot.
"Oh, God. Oh my God. Holy. Jesus!" I scream again, another wave of pure bliss crashing over me when he dips two thick fingers in deep. I feel like I'm being tugged under in some riptide of pleasure and it's almost too much for me to bear.
"That's it, Sunshine. That's it," he coos in my ear as I ride the wave, helpless to do anything but hold on to him tight. "Fuck, the way you milk my fingers makes me so hard."
I feel his weight shift, and just when I think I'm coming down from the second wave, he is pushing his thick cock in deep and prolonging my orgasm. He's leaning up on his knees, careful to keep his weight off my stomach, and pushing in quick bursts. It doesn't take long before I'm barreling over yet another wave. Or hell, maybe I've been riding the same one, in some funnel of pleasure that my body doesn't know how to escape from--and doesn't want to.
It doesn't take long, despite the fact that, in the last few hours, he's already come twice; he pushes in deep and rolls his hips. His face is the picture of ecstasy as he empties himself inside me again.
I always used to read the books where the hero would come, and come, and come...and then come again. I'd roll my eyes, thinking that surely there was no way a man like that--with stamina of a god--exists. Tonight, Asher proved me wrong. Those men definitely do exist. And he's all mine.
***
I can feel myself getting tired, but I know I can't go to sleep until Asher and I have talked. I don't feel right with this entire unknown, ticking time bomb sitting between us. I need to know where he's coming from, where his head is, and what his plans are.
He comes back from dropping another used washcloth in the dirty laundry hamper and climbs in behind me, curling his arm around my body and pulling me close. His palm instantly goes to my stomach and caresses the tight skin. I can feel our son rolling around, and I smile when I feel Asher laugh against my back.
"We need to talk, baby," I start.
He sighs. "I know."
"Do you want to start? Maybe let me in and tell me what's kept you gone for the last two weeks? I'm not going to even lie, Ash. It killed me to think that I wasn't enough for you to let in and let help. I'm not going to crumble. I'm here to walk this road with you, remember?"
"Suns
hine, I saw your distress. I saw how much that letter shook you, and it killed me that something I'm doing could be the cause of your fear."
I turn, rolling onto my other side and grabbing his hand to hold it between both of mine. I admire how strong his long fingers are, just like he is. "Of course I was afraid, Asher. That's the normal reaction that anyone would feel if they were in the same position. That didn't mean that I needed you to protect me from knowing what was happening. I want to be that person you confide in. I want to help you, Asher."
"You know I never stopped looking into Dominic, right?"
I nod my head. I do in fact know how much he's researched his target. I helped him for months, compiling everything we could find on that scumbag.
"Yeah, I didn't think you stopped. I had hoped, but I think deep down I knew you hadn't given up."
He closes his eyes tight, moving his forehead in that way he does so that it's resting against mine. His harsh breathing is dancing with each one of my calm breaths.
"I have enough intel on him now that it wouldn't take much for me to end this tomorrow. I know where he is at almost every second thanks to a tracking device I was able to slip under his car. When he leaves his compound, I know. I've been following his every move for the last eight days."
His admission shocks me to the core. He's been putting himself in danger. Recklessly kicking his thirst for vengeance into overdrive because of one stupid letter.
"Oh, baby...no," I plead, shaking my head rapidly against his.
"I have to, Chelcie. I don't know any other way to explain it. I feel like if I don't take care of him that Coop will never rest in peace."
"Oh you silly, silly man."
He draws back as if I've slapped him. I quickly finish before he gets the wrong impression.
"Your brother knew exactly what he was doing that day. I might not have seen it happen with my own eyes, but I know what kind of man he was--what kind of man you taught him to be--well enough to know that he didn't act without weighing all his options. It was a grim situation at any angle you look at it." I take a deep breath and let go of his hand so that I can hold his face framed in my palms. I need to be able to look him in the eyes when I say this. He needs to see the truth within my own. "Don't you see it, Ash? You're the one who taught him to be the man he was. You gave him every single tool he needed in order to become that man. He stepped in front of that bullet because he was brave and selfless. He did it so that he could save someone else, knowing damn well that, if something went wrong, he was sacrificing his own life. You can't keep beating yourself up because you weren't there to protect him. I see you, baby. I know you think this misguided quest of vengeance is what Coop would want, but if you really believe that--really believe in your heart that he wanted that..." I pause to collect my thoughts when I see his eyes flash. "If you really believe that, baby, then you didn't know him at all."
His body is strung so tight right now that I know this is impossibly hard for him to hear, but I need him to hear it. I need him to hear it and I pray that he understands.
"This quest to right a wrong, the vengeance that you're seeking? He wouldn't want that. You have to start living your life for the future that you're alive for, not the past that you're willing to die for."
His eyes close slowly, one lone tear falling down his face, and I quickly sweep it away with my thumb.
"I'm so close, Sunshine. I'm so close to ending it all. So close to ending this pain. I don't know if I can stop." His hushed words break my heart. I ache for him.
"You can, baby. You know you can. Talk to me. Why do you think that ending this monster's life would be worse than turning all of your evidence over to the right channels and making sure that he really pays? Don't you think a life behind bars is far worse than a quick death? You really need to think about that, Asher, because by you being willing to continue down this path means that you're willing to put everything we've been building in jeopardy. If something goes wrong, you could be the one who ends up behind bars. Or worse, you could end up dead, and I'm telling you right now--I don't think I would survive that loss. I don't want to have to explain to little Zac why his daddy isn't here." It's taking every ounce of control that I possess not to break down right now. I keep my voice steady and my words strong, knowing that, if I break down, he might not hear I word I say.
"Zac?" he questions with a furrow of his thick brows.
"Our son, Asher. Zachariah Asher Cooper, but I've been calling him Zac for short." I give him a small smile and watch in fascination as a million emotions filter through his mind on his face.
My big, strong man is falling apart, and I do the only thing I know to do--I pull him closer and drop my forehead to his. I rub his back as he gasps rapidly, trying to calm the war of emotions inside him down. He doesn't speak. He does his best at keeping it locked tight, but a few broken sobs break through his lips. I bite the inside of my cheek to keep from crying with him. I just run my fingers through his hair and down his back, holding him tight within my arms. Giving him back the strength he's been giving me since the day I met him.
After a long time of heavy breathing and a few more sobs, I hear him clear his throat. He doesn't look up, but I know he's about to address me, so I mentally hold on in preparation for what is to come.
"I'll talk to the guys tomorrow. I'll give them all the intel I have, and together, we will decide what the best course is. I'm not giving you any promises, Sunshine, but I will see what they think, and if they agree with you, then I'll call a good friend of mine with the DEA and give them everything. For Coop--and for you...and Zac. For all of us. I'll make sure that I do the right thing," he sighs. "I want you to be there with me so that you know everything that's going on, okay?"
I let out the breath I didn't realize I was holding, feeling lighter than I have in weeks. I wrap my arms around him and bury my face in his neck. His arms come around me and we hold each other, soaking up the love we have and the knowledge that, from now on--no questions--we're in this together.
Chapter 27 - Asher
Damn, it's been one crazy week. I've been running after the same skip--three different states--and finally, I've caught up to the slimy bastard. Of all the places I have to end the chase, it has to be a strip club. After almost starting a brawl in the club, I finally manage to secure the bastard and make my long drive home.
Almost twelve hours later, with the afternoon sun blazing high in the sky, I feel like my body is literally dragging on the ground. I just want to get back to my apartment and crash. Hell, I wouldn't be surprised if I sleep for a week straight.
The first thing I do when I climb my tired ass up the old stairs to my one-bedroom rent-by-the-week apartment is pull out my phone and call Coop. It's been almost two weeks since we talked last, and I hate going that long without checking on him.
"Ash!" he bellows through the line, making me wince. Damn migraine.
"Hey, brother. How's it going?"
"Uh, you know--same shit, different day. We've got some kind of crazy going down here. I'm starting to think it wouldn't feel normal if things weren't falling to shit." He laughs. Leave it to Coop to find something in any situation to laugh about.
You never would have guessed that he was the same kid who used to cower meekly in the corner. Damn, I'm so proud of the man he's become.
"Yeah, not sure that's something to be excited about, man."
"No sense in acting like someone pissed in my Cheerios either."
"Guess you've got me there, Coop." I laugh dryly.
Damn, I'm tired.
"What's got you down, big brother?" he worries.
I consider how much I want to tell him. I've always tried to keep him from seeing just how lonely I am. I know he's content with his life, but sometimes I wish he felt differently about his outlook on the future. The 'fuck and run' we've both mastered over the years is getting old as hell. For once, I'm starting to wish I weren't so fucked up and I could find some normal Suzie Homemaker and mak
e some normal life for myself.
"You ever get sick of this shit, Coop? I just spent the last seven days on the road chasing after this dirtbag that skipped out on his bail--again--only to come home to my empty apartment. Hell, I don't even really have an apartment. I pay for this crap weekly and there is nothing of mine here. All this furniture came with the rent. I don't know, brother. I guess I've just been wondering if there's more out there for me. For us."
He's silent long enough for me to think that the call dropped, but he clears his throat and I sit, waiting to hear what he's going to say. This isn't the first time we've talked about wanting something more. Or rather I've talked and he's listened silently.
"I didn't realize you were still feeling this way, Asher." He exhales. "Just because I don't want more--ever--doesn't mean that you can't have it. Look, we had one fucked-up childhood. Things got easier for you when you got older, and I guess I still see things differently. I refuse to ever be that weak motherfucker again. I'm in charge of my life, me alone, and I will never give another person the power to hurt me. I get it, man. I really do. The guys here seem to be dropping like flies, and their chicks aren't anything like she was. They're really amazing ladies. But even knowing that there's something different than her out there doesn't change my mind." He takes a deep breath, and I imagine him pacing around, collecting his thoughts. "I'm happy with my life the way it is, Ash. I've got some great friends here, my own place, a job I love, and enough pussy to last me a lifetime. The only thing that could make that better is if you gave up that bounty hunter shit and came to work with us."
"Yeah, not sure that's going to happen. I like the challenge of my work," I argue.
"Whatever. The point is, I don't need more to be happy. I've got a good life, brother, and if it were all over tomorrow, I wouldn't have one damn thing that I regret. You only live once, right?"
"Did you just YOLO me? Damn, Coop, we need to get you graduated from high school," I laugh.
"Hardy har har. Laugh all you want. You know I'm right." His deep chuckle comes through the line, and I smile, picturing him standing there, smiling like a freaking idiot.
"Miss you, little brother."