Page 5 of The Search

“I can do only what I can,” he said wearily. “I told you I’d try to keep you safe.”

  “Trying isn’t good enough.” She reached down and stroked Monty’s head, then said through gritted teeth, “Do you know how this makes me feel? It’s not only you who’s responsible for putting Monty in danger. He’s my dog. The bottom line is always me. He never says no, so if I make the wrong decision, I have to bear the blame.”

  “Even if I blackmailed you into it?”

  “That makes you a bastard, but I’m the one who makes the final decision.”

  He was silent a moment. “You find the camp and you’re done. You won’t be within a mile of any firepower. Nothing will happen to you or Monty.”

  “I know,” she said sarcastically. “You’ll try to keep us safe.”

  “No. It won’t happen. I promise you.”

  She turned to look at him.

  “You don’t believe me?”

  “Should I?”

  “I suppose not. Sometimes fate takes a hand and there’s nothing anyone can do to change what happens. But if I’m still alive when we get out of that jungle, you and Monty will be too.” He grimaced. “I assure you that’s not a promise that’s easy for me to make. I have a keen sense of self-preservation.” He stood up. “I’m going to the cockpit to talk to our pilot. You might make a list of your needs on this job, and I’ll call my assistant and have her make sure they’re waiting for you in Santo Camaro. There’s a pad and pencil in the drawer of the table next to you. I won’t be gone more than fifteen or twenty minutes, but then, I’m sure you won’t miss me.”

  “No, I won’t.” She watched him walk down the aisle before she reached for the pad and pencil and started making her list. Why had he tried so hard to convince her he’d protect her and Monty? They were nothing to him. Just tools to get him what he wanted. Yet for a moment she had believed him. She had faced crooked bureaucrats and power figures in disaster sites around the world, and she could recognize sincerity when she saw it.

  Or could she? Logan had learned manipulation in a hundred corporate boardrooms. Maybe he was a little out of her league.

  Bull. Either she trusted her judgment or she didn’t. Was Logan a complete son of a bitch or was there a trace of softness that she could exploit?

  She finished her list, then closed her eyes. She didn’t want to exploit anyone or anything. She just wished she could go home and forget about Logan and Madden and everything connected with them.

  “Coffee?”

  She opened her eyes to see Logan holding a cup out to her.

  He smiled faintly. “It’s only coffee. It’s not like eating at your enemy’s table. Besides, you should really take me for all you can get. Food, drink, money.” He looked down at Monty. “Isn’t that right, boy?”

  Monty’s tail thumped, and he rolled over on his back.

  Logan reached down and scratched his belly. Monty gave a soft woo-woo from the back of his throat.

  Good.

  “Traitor,” she muttered.

  Nice.

  “The hell he is.”

  Logan raised his brows. “Am I missing something?”

  “You’re not going to convince me you’re a great guy just by petting my dog.”

  “But he likes me.”

  “Don’t flatter yourself. He likes everyone. He’s a golden retriever, for God’s sake. They’re known for being affectionate . . . even with someone who doesn’t deserve it.”

  Nice.

  She looked down at Monty in disgust. No discrimination.

  “Why do I feel out of the loop here?” Logan thrust the cup at her. “The reports I had on you said that you could almost read that dog’s mind. I’m beginning to think he may be able to read yours too. Drink your coffee while I go get your familiar a bowl of water.”

  Before she could argue, he was strolling back to the galley.

  Monty wriggled over onto his belly. Nice.

  She ignored him as she took a sip of the coffee. She had been tempted to refuse, but she was so tired she could scarcely think, and what he said made sense. Why shouldn’t she use him as he was using her? She suddenly stiffened as a thought occurred to her. My God, why not? Why sit there feeling sorry for herself when she had a chance to—

  “Good. I was afraid you’d pour that coffee on the floor.” Logan set a delicate china bowl down before Monty. “I’m glad you’re being sensible.”

  “And being sensible is doing what you want me to do?” She took another drink of coffee. “I wanted this coffee, so I took it. I’m not into futile gestures.”

  “Why isn’t Monty drinking?”

  “He won’t take food or drink from anyone but me.” She reached down, touched the rim of the bowl, and Monty started thirstily lapping up the water. “That’s fine china. Monty may break it. He has a tendency to push his bowl around when it’s empty.”

  “It’s all I had and he deserves the best.”

  “Yes, he does. Screw your china.” She looked around the luxurious interior of the jet. “This is beautiful. I’ve never seen one like it.”

  “I like to be comfortable. I do a lot of traveling and there’s nothing worse than being tired and irritable when I get off a plane. One mistake in protocol or financial misstep and the entire trip could be blown.” He sat down beside her. “And do you see the inside of a lot of corporate jets?”

  “A few. The government seldom pays for transporting search and rescue groups, and the current administration has given us zilch.” Her lips twisted. “Though they’re very willing to take advantage of any publicity we generate. We rely heavily on corporations to give us a ride when we need it.”

  “I’m surprised. Billions of dollars in foreign aid and not a dime to search and rescue?”

  “We get along.” She shrugged. “It’s probably better that the government doesn’t get involved. We’d probably have to fill out requests in triplicate and deal with strings attached.”

  He was silent a moment. “Like the ones Madden has you dancing on?”

  She stiffened. “You don’t have an aversion to pulling the strings yourself. You’re both into power trips.”

  He quickly changed the subject. “You have a job with ATF, don’t you? Don’t they foot the bill to send you and Monty to disaster sites?”

  “Only when there are explosives involved. ATF doesn’t have search and rescue missions.”

  “Then why did you take the job?”

  “I had to live.” She glanced out the window. “And after the first year I was only loosely affiliated with ATF. Monty and I were permitted to go with volunteer search and rescue groups when we weren’t being loaned out to police departments to use in particularly difficult cases.”

  “Cadaver searches?”

  “Yes.”

  “Why did you do it? You hate them. I had to twist your arm to get you to help Eve.”

  “I did what I had to do.”

  He studied her closed expression with narrowed eyes. “And why would you have to do it? Why not just quit?”

  “I told you, I had to live.”

  “I don’t think that’s the reason.” He said thoughtfully, “You live simply and seem to enjoy it. I offered you any amount you wanted for this job. So it’s not money. Blackmail? Now, what kind of crime could you have committed to put you under Madden’s thumb?”

  She stared him directly in the eyes. “I murdered a manipulating bastard who pried into my business.”

  He chuckled. “Sorry, I’m cursed with an inquiring mind. You’re an interesting enigma, Sarah. The temptation to solve you is almost irresistible.”

  “Because you think you may need another hold on me?”

  His smile faded. “No.”

  “Bullshit. You’re thinking all the time, weighing advantages and disadvantages, bad moves, good moves. This was a bad move, Logan.”

  “It was the only one I had.”

  “There are always choices. You chose Monty and me. It may be the worst choice you’ve ever made. B
ecause if anything happens to Monty, I’ll hunt you down and tear you limb from limb.” She finished her coffee in one swallow. “I’ve been sitting here, doing some thinking myself. For some reason you want my willing cooperation to find this Bassett. I don’t know why. Maybe you’re smart enough to realize that working smoothly together as a team will increase the chances of getting him out.”

  “Perish the thought that I might dislike using force.”

  “That never occurred to me. You’re a user, like Madden. If force was needed, you’d be there with your little hatchet.” Her lips tightened. “Well, I’m tired of being used. It’s not going to happen again. Not by you and not by Madden.”

  “Really.”

  “You want cooperation, I’ll give you cooperation. I’ll get your man out, but I want a payoff.”

  “I told you I’d give you any amount you wanted.”

  “I want Madden out of my life.”

  He was silent a moment. “I’ve no doubt he’s very unpleasant, but I hope you don’t want me to take a contract out on him. That could be very awkward.”

  “What if I said I did?” she asked, curious.

  “I’d have to think about it.”

  Her eyes widened with shock as she realized he wasn’t ruling out the possibility. “Don’t be stupid. I just want him out of my life with no holds on me.”

  “That’s a great relief. You wouldn’t care to confide what hold he has on you?”

  She didn’t answer.

  “I didn’t think so. You don’t trust me. You’re afraid I’ll just take over the reins from Madden. Did it occur to you that you’ll still run that risk?”

  “It occurred to me. That’s part of the deal. I’m free of both of you.”

  “Then it seems you trust me more than you do Madden.”

  “Eve trusts you. You might keep your word. And once this job is over, you won’t have any other use for me. You can afford to let me go.”

  “True. But I can hardly help you if I go at it blind.”

  “I’ll tell you when you need to know.”

  “And why do you think I can help you?”

  “I don’t have the kind of clout I need to get away from him or I’d have done it years ago. Is it a deal?”

  Logan slowly nodded. “As long as you give me your best effort, Madden’s out of your life whether we get my man out or not. You have my word on it.”

  She felt a flicker of surprise.

  “I’m not quite the bastard you think me,” Logan said roughly. “Ask Eve. As you said, she trusts me.”

  “She’s prejudiced. You were lovers. You probably behaved differently with her than you do with other people.”

  “Yeah, I made a really big effort to treat her like a human being. It was a great strain on me.” He stood up. “I need to go and make some telephone calls. Why don’t you stretch out on the couch and try to sleep? We’re going to hit the ground running when we reach Santo Camaro.” He picked up the list on the table. “Is this all you need?”

  “That’s it.”

  “I’ll see that you get it,” he said, and strode down the aisle.

  She had made him angry and his response had been uncharacteristically vulnerable. Maybe he wasn’t quite the steely man she had thought. But it didn’t matter how hard or soft he was as long as he could get Madden out of her life.

  A life without the threat of Madden . . .

  The thought brought an unbelievable surge of relief. For years she had lived without hope, and suddenly the possibility was there before her. Win or lose, Madden would be out of her life if she just did her job. Logan had given his word.

  Monty whined softly and put his head on her knee, sensing her excitement.

  “We’ve got a chance, boy,” she whispered. “If he’s not lying, we may be able to come out of this with something pretty good.”

  Nice.

  “He’s not nice, but it doesn’t matter if he keeps his word.”

  Nice.

  Stubborn dog. She got up and moved over to the couch. “Come on, we have to get some sleep. We want to be in top form and get through this fast and get home.”

  Monty settled on the floor in front of the couch, but his gaze went to the back of the cabin, where Logan had disappeared.

  Nice . . .

  “Then you’ve got her?” Margaret asked after Logan had rattled off Sarah’s list to her. “I was hoping maybe you’d strike out.”

  “I know you were. You made that pretty clear,” Logan said. “Find out everything you can about Todd Madden. I want a complete report.”

  “How complete?”

  “I want to know the name of every kid he mugged in kindergarten.”

  “Oh, that kind of report. I gather we’re no longer playing on the same team with him?”

  “He’s on the funding committee for ATF, but I don’t think that’s how he’s pulling Sarah Patrick’s strings. It’s something else.”

  “You’ve got her. What difference does it make?”

  “It makes a difference. Any messages?”

  “Galen called from Bogotá. He said it’s not urgent, but he wants you to phone him.”

  “As soon as I hang up. Did he mention any problems?”

  “No, he said to tell you the team was in place.” She paused and then added grudgingly, “You know, I really like him.”

  “And that surprises you? Oh, yes, it would. You’re not supposed to like men like Galen. It violates your code.”

  “Yes, it does, but Galen is . . . different.”

  “That’s indisputable. Nothing from Castleton?”

  “No. And it may take a while to get the dirt on Madden. He’s a politician and they bury their skeletons pretty deep.”

  “Just get it.”

  “How’s the pooch?”

  “Easier than Sarah.”

  “Well, you can hardly blame her for—”

  “I’ll call you when we get to Santo Camaro.” He ended the call and dialed Galen’s number.

  “What’s happening?”

  “No greeting? No small talk?” Galen drawled. “After all those years in Tokyo, I’d think you’d have learned some manners.”

  “Do you have a location?”

  “Have I ever failed you? I got a general location, but Sanchez says Rudzak moves camp every few days. And he’s going to set up a decoy camp as bait.”

  “We have to find the main camp now. We can’t afford any extra time. We have to get in and out fast or we’ll have a dead hostage. You’re sure you got the truth from Sanchez?”

  “I’m truly hurt. Not only a lack of manners, but doubt? I admit Sanchez was stubborn, but eventually his good sense prevailed.”

  “Money?”

  “No. Sanchez already makes a tremendous amount in the drug trade. There’s millions floating around down here. I had to convince the scumbag he’d be safer running from Rudzak than from me. Can you imagine, he wasn’t taking me seriously?”

  “I’m sure that didn’t last long.”

  “Almost thirty minutes.”

  “You’re slipping.”

  “Now insults?” He made a tsk-tsk sound. “And while I was at it, I did that little research project you heaped on me.”

  “And?”

  “Confirmed.”

  Logan’s hand tightened on the phone. “Son of a bitch.”

  “Do you want me to take care of it?”

  “No, I’ll do it myself.” Dammit, he had known it. “But I can’t have Sanchez ratting to Rudzak.”

  “He won’t. I sent him out of the country with a suitcase of Rudzak’s money he was laundering. He’s neatly boxed.”

  “Good,” Logan said. “We’ll be arriving in Santo Camaro shortly.”

  “I’m already on my way. I should be there in about an hour, and I’ll contact Castleton to pick you up at the airport.”

  Logan hung up. Everything was in motion. As usual, Galen had succeeded and had the information he needed. Logan had Sarah and Monty in hand and had fou
nd a way to get Sarah to voluntarily work with him.

  Yeah, sure. Actually Sarah had taken control. She’d turned a situation that made her a victim to one in which she had control. How many times had she had to do that with her life on the line?

  Christ, what was he doing? He had made his decision and it was no time for regrets. He shoved his phone in his pocket, left his office, and started back up the aisle toward the cockpit.

  Sarah was asleep on the couch and didn’t stir as he stopped beside her. Monty opened one eye and his tail thumped lazily.

  “Shh.”

  But Sarah didn’t wake, and even in slumber she was curled up in a defensive position, her muscles locked and stiff.

  Search and rescue. What made anyone embrace a career that involved not only danger but constant despair? All the dossiers and reports in the world never really told you what made a person tick. Logan knew Sarah was strong, smart, streetwise, and had a wicked sense of humor with everyone but him. But he was beginning to realize that there might be a whole lot more beneath that tough facade. What kind of woman was Sarah Patrick?

  Well, he was not likely to find out. She was wary and he had established himself firmly in the enemy camp. What the hell. It didn’t matter. He didn’t have to know her. It was better if he didn’t. He had learned a long time ago that it was dangerous to get close to people in dangerous situations. It hurt too much if you lost them.

  Chen Li.

  He shunted the thought back into the darkness, where it belonged. He had been younger, less experienced then. This situation didn’t have to end as that one had. Sarah Patrick wasn’t Chen Li.

  He could keep Sarah alive.

  Santo Camaro

  “This is Sarah Patrick,” Logan told Castleton at the airport. “Ron Castleton. He works for me.”

  “Don’t we all,” she murmured. She gestured and Monty jumped into Castleton’s car. “How do you do, Mr. Castleton. This is Monty. I don’t have any health papers for him. Are we going to have any trouble with the authorities?”

  Castleton was staring wide-eyed at the dog. “What’s happening here? If I’d had any warning, I could have—”

  “We won’t need papers,” Logan said. “We’ll be in and out before anyone knows we’ve arrived.”

  “And what if we aren’t?”