“Shhh, it’s okay. I have you, baby. I’m right here.” The words echoed through her head, as memories threatened, for the briefest second, to explode through her head.
“I have you, Lilly,” he whispered again, supporting her body, holding her upright as she fought against the brutal pressure in her brain.
“I’m sorry,” she gasped as his arms went around her, holding her against him as the pain slowly receded. “I didn’t mean that.”
His hand cupped the back of her head as he held it against his shoulder.
“I don’t lie to you,” he said gently, his lips against her ear. “I have no reason to lie to you, Lilly.”
And that, too, was the truth. How could he lie and yet be telling the truth? The conflicting instincts inside her were driving her mad.
“I want to make sense of what’s going on inside my head,” she whispered, a breath of sound that she knew only he could hear. “I want to make sense of who I am, and what I know and don’t know. And why, Travis, why do I trust no one but you?”
Why was her voice so low? It was a breath of sound covered by the rasp of tears she refused to shed as Travis held her close against him.
She could feel the tremors racing through her now, almost like shock, trembling through her body and rasping her voice as she fought to make sense of who she was. What she was.
“It’s shock, baby.” He kissed her forehead gently before swinging her up in his arms and sitting with her on the bed, holding her close. “It’s just shock. You could have died today. It’s finally catching up with you, that’s all.” There was an edge of warning in his voice, the same warning she often saw in his eyes.
Her room wasn’t secure. That thought raced through her mind once again as the pain eased entirely away. There was no way, at this moment, to ensure that no one was listening.
“Just shock,” she repeated as she stared over his shoulder into the dimming sunlight that glowed through the balcony doors, knowing it was more than just the shock.
She eased away from him, staring up at him intently. The pain had left slowly, but in its place was a certainty that if she didn’t figure out who was trying to kill her, quickly, then it would be too late. And perhaps it would be too late for both of them.
Travis held her tight, fighting his own demons, fighting the emotions that threatened to overwhelm him. When he had been inducted into the Elite Ops, he had been warned that his loyalty was to the team, and no one else. He no longer had a family, a country, or a lover. His entire loyalty was to the team and to nothing and no one else.
He’d had no problem with that then. He hadn’t wanted to divide himself, to risk his heart, or the lives of those he loved, again.
Standing there now, holding onto Lilly, he knew that that loyalty had changed, shifted focus. Hell, it had done so six years ago and he hadn’t even realized it. The team was taking a backseat to the woman, and he knew it.
Staring into her eyes as she looked up at him, Travis had to fight himself, to keep from telling her the truth. At that moment there was nothing more important than giving her the answers she needed with such desperation.
Lilly breathed in deep and hard to regain control of herself. The emotion and the needs ripping through her, the fear that battled with confusion.
I’m checking the garage later, Lilly mouthed. Someone had tried to kill her. Her cycle had been parked in the underground garage, unattended. Perhaps something had been left behind.
He shook his head firmly. He wasn’t arguing vocally with her. That was telling.
They had worked together often, he had said. She was trained for covert maneuvers, personal protection and guerrilla tactics. She sensed that. They were partners in more than the bedroom games they had been playing. It was time she put some of that knowledge, those instincts to use and figured out what the hell was going on. She might not have her memories, but she still had her instincts and the bits of knowledge that were coming to her in bits and pieces, every day. She knew just enough to make her dangerous now. Just enough to possibly get her killed.
But she wouldn’t go alone.
Lilly smiled at the thought.
Travis saw the smile. As John had stated earlier that day, this was pure Night Hawk. This was not Lady Victoria Lillian Harrington. This was the agent. The woman that could be more dangerous than most men could ever hope to be.
That gleam of stubbornness filled her eyes, and though he’d been expecting it, it still managed to surprise him.
She was morphing right in front of his eyes from the lady she was believed to be, to the dangerous covert agent she had been. The separate parts of Lilly weren’t merging together cohesively, or better yet for the Ops, the agent persona hadn’t died entirely.
No, he mouthed back at her. It’s being taken care of.
She jerked her arm from his grip, a frown tightening her brow as her lips thinned again. She wasn’t the least bit happy that someone else might be taking care of anything.
“I know how to take care of my own business,” she warned him in a low whisper, the light English accent slipping away from her to reveal the cool, accentless tone of the agent Lilly Belle.
Even now, knowing who and what she was, he found it damned hard to see Lilly as an agent right now. Hell, he’d seen her in action more than once, and it was still hard to believe it all the way to his soul.
“This has gone beyond your business.” He gripped her arm, keeping his voice to a mere breath of a sound. “Back off, Lilly, and let me take care of this.”
“I don’t need you to take care of this for me,” she assured him. “I’ll take care of this on my own.”
She was going to make him crazy. If she remembered who she was, what she had been, he might not have been nearly so worried. But she didn’t remember, and God only knew how many of the instincts buried inside her memories were still hidden.
She was adept now, she had proved that in the garage today. But he couldn’t be certain, clear to his soul, that she had retained enough of her past identity to be able to protect herself effectively.
“I have guests to greet,” she reminded him as she flashed him a hard look from gem-cold green eyes. “And a party to attend. We need to leave now, if you don’t mind.”
Damn her. Travis had to grit his teeth to keep from snapping out something he knew would cause a confrontation. Lilly didn’t deal well with what she called “smart-ass male remarks.” Not that he did well with the feminine kind either. Strangely enough, though, when her sweet mouth got smart, his dick just got hard.
It was hard now. As he followed her from the bedroom, along the open hall and down the elaborate, curved staircase, his cock was throbbing with an increased hunger that he was damned if he knew what to do with. Especially at the moment.
“Mr. Caine.” Desmond Harrington stepped from the open doorway of the ballroom, his gaze cautious as the doorbell rang and Lilly took her place at her mother’s side.
“Lord Harrington. Lady Harrington.” Travis paused at the bottom of the steps and observed Lilly’s mother watching her with a glimmer of silent condemnation.
Lady Harrington wasn’t happy to see him.
“Why am I not surprised to see you here, Caine?” Lord Harrington sighed as the first guests began to filter into the large foyer.
Lord Desmond Harrington’s expression was heavy, resigned. The deep furrows in his forehead, surprisingly, went along with his rough face. He was a man that had survived by his own wits and business sense, unlike his half brother who had been born into society and a fortune that stretched back to Cromwell’s time.
“I don’t know, Lord Harrington, why aren’t you surprised?” he asked the other man as he kept his eyes on Lilly.
Lilly seemed too off balance. Travis could sense the fine line she was riding, the sharp edge of nerves and confl
ict that were tearing at her.
“You’re sneering at my title,” the other man growled, though there was no true heat in his voice. “It’s offensive.”
Travis grunted at the accusation. “Perhaps you don’t understand an American’s version of respect.”
He was actually more English than Harrington was. He was a Dermont, born into a long line of Dermonts, and had inherited a fortune that stretched back even further than Cromwell’s time. His grandsires had married proud English heiresses and built that fortune until the present Lord Dermont could sit back and rest on the fine pillows his ancestors had created for him.
“American, huh?” Harrington’s tone was singularly disbelieving. “Why do I have a feeling there’s much more to you than meets the eye, or the investigator’s report?”
Travis turned back to him, his brow lifting. “Went that far, did you?” He was a bit amused by the fact.
“You’re not exactly on the right side of the law,” Harrington muttered. “You’re a danger to her now. You were a danger to her before.”
No, Travis hadn’t been a danger to her. They had saved each other’s lives more than once. His Lilly was a hell of a lot more woman than Desmond Harrington could ever guess.
Travis turned to Lilly’s uncle and stared back at him with a hard gaze for long seconds before saying, “You won’t convince her to let me go, Harrington. Don’t even try it.”
Desmond grimaced. “I’m figuring that out, but it’s something her mother isn’t happy over.”
“And her brother?” Travis asked. “I notice he’s not here to celebrate her return to the family fold.”
For a second, regret and grief flashed in Desmond’s pale blue eyes. He turned away for a moment before sipping from the drink he held in his hand.
“Jared is having a hard time coming to grips with this,” he finally stated as he stared down his nose at Travis. “But I have a feeling you’re already aware of that.”
Aware of that didn’t fully describe it. He knew damned good and well that Jared Harrington had turned his back on his sister at the hospital, proclaiming that the woman lying unconscious before him was not his sister.
Her face had changed, but her relationship to him hadn’t. Still, Jared had denounced her, just as he still denounced her despite the DNA tests that assured the world she was indeed who she purported to be. She had changed her looks, her name, her life, he had claimed. She had disowned her family first.
Travis stepped back as the guests began to file into the ballroom, stopping to greet Desmond, then moving to the buffet and drink bar.
As Senator Stanton greeted Desmond, Travis noticed the other man’s gaze sliding toward him as though curious. Several minutes later Santos and Rhiannon made their appearance as well, their business personas firmly intact. Cool, professional. Just a hint of danger.
“Mr. Caine, it’s good to see you again,” Rhiannon greeted him, resplendent in a long silver and black strapless ballgown that gave her the appearance of one of the fairies she was named for.
“Rhiannon, Santos.” Travis nodded as they shook hands, well aware of Desmond’s interest as he watched them.
“It’s wonderful to see Lilly again,” Rhiannon commented with a cool smile. “Santos and I have been worried about her.”
“There’s no need to worry,” Desmond growled. “She’s safe with her family, where she’s supposed to be.”
Rhiannon’s brow arched. “I believe that’s how we came to meet Lilly to begin with,” she stated softly. “The dubious protection of the bosom of her loving family. I hope you take better care of her this time, Lord Harrington.”
Harrington’s jaw tightened furiously as his pale blue eyes shot enraged flames Rhiannon’s way. Her response was yet another cool smile before she moved at Santos’s urging to join the party inside.
“I don’t like your friends,” Lilly’s uncle informed him as he turned an angry glare on Travis.
Travis shrugged. “Friends and acquaintances are two different things, Harrington. But she does have a point.”
“And that being?” he snapped.
“Lilly’s family didn’t protect her diligently enough. A mistake I don’t intend to make.”
Travis turned his gaze back to Lilly then, watching her portray the genteel English lady to perfection as she helped her mother greet the guests as they filed in.
She was sleek and well-mannered with just the slightest hint of reservation as she spoke to the guests who were once close friends.
Those friends had married in the past six years, had had children, moved away from the interests they had once shared and accepted the death of the young woman they had called their friend.
Now, they were facing her again, and sensing the changes within her. Changes that made them wary and uncomfortable.
As the line began to thin, he snagged a drink from a waiter’s tray and moved closer to her.
“Thank you.” There was a gleam of desperation in her gaze that he was certain even her mother hadn’t seen as she took the champagne and sipped at it. Very ladylike. But he noticed she consumed more in one sip than most ladies would in the same situation.
“The band is starting up,” he murmured as he bent to her ear. “Shall we go inside, snag a plate from the buffet, and dance a bit later?”
“Lilly has duties to attend.” Lady Harrington turned to him with a frosty smile and a gleam of hatred in her eyes. “Do be a nice gentleman and amuse yourself elsewhere.”
He felt Lilly stiffen beside him. “That’s enough, Mother,” she said gently. “If you’ll excuse me, I believe I will take Travis up on his offer. We can talk later.”
“Lilly.” Lady Harrington caught her daughter’s arm as she turned to leave. “Don’t consort with him in public. It’s bad enough you do so in private,” she hissed for her daughter’s ears alone.
“I love you, Mother.” She kissed her mother’s cheek before turning, accepting Travis’s arm, and moving slowly away.
Travis felt an edge of sorrow for the other woman. She had her daughter back, but it wasn’t the daughter she remembered, and it was one she was having a very hard time accepting.
“The party will wind down around midnight,” Lilly stated as they entered the ballroom. “Be ready to go to the garage with me, or I’ll go alone.”
She kept a smile on her face the whole time.
“I wouldn’t advise that,” he warned her tightly.
“I’m certain you wouldn’t, but it doesn’t really matter.” She stopped and stared up at him, ice filling her gaze. “Someone has tried to kill me twice now. I’ll find out who it is, Travis, and when I do, they’ll pay.”
There was more than anger in her voice now, there was pain. The frosty reception she had received from her friends, the condemnation in their gazes, the unsympathetic curiosity, all were taking their toll.
She may have been one of the Ops’s best female agents, but she was also one of the few that had managed to retain her heart, as well as her dreams.
“Travis, Senator Stanton wants to meet.” Nik edged close, his voice pitched low as Travis watched Lilly while she listened to one of Desmond’s closest friends brag about a recent business deal he and Desmond had made.
The stiffness in her body was telling. The observation of moments ago cemented in Travis’s mind as he noticed her discomfort.
“When?” Travis murmured.
“It’s set for now. Santos, Rhiannon, Noah, myself, and you. You have five minutes.”
“Where?”
“Your limo.”
Travis gave a quick nod. “Inform me I have a business call and I’ll take it in the limo.” Travis lifted his drink to his lips as he spoke.
Nik inclined his head before moving to stand behind Travis, taking his stance as bodyguard.
/> Travis continued to move about the ballroom with Lilly, listening, watching, as she reconnected with those old friends.
Their discomfort and guilt nearly matched hers.
There was no doubt in his mind that Lilly no longer fit in with the society she had been raised in. The fact that she was no longer Lady Victoria was becoming more and more apparent.
“Mr. Caine, you have a business call,” Nik announced just loudly enough to allow those he was standing close to to hear.
“Lilly, dear.” Travis bent close to her ear as she turned to him. “Stay in the ballroom. Keep your eyes open. Let’s see who approaches you while I’m gone.”
She nodded, but her gaze was filled with suspicion as he laid a quick kiss at her brow before heading out of the ballroom and then the house.
His limo was parked at the far edge of the wide circular drive. Opening the door, Nik stepped aside as Travis slid in, then joined him before closing the door securely.
“Senator.” Travis nodded at the older man sitting across from him.
“Good to see you, Travis.” Senator Richard Stanton reached out his hand for a quick shake before sitting back with a smile. “Jordan told me you were surprised when you learned about Elite Command. Did you think he shouldered the entire burden of the Ops on his own shoulders?”
“They’re broad enough, sir.” Travis grinned. “Though I doubt he’d thank me for saying so.”
“Hell, no,” Stanton grunted a laugh. “That boy is a hell of a commander, but politics aren’t exactly his forte. He pisses off most of the members of Command every chance he gets.”
“As do most of us who are unfortunate enough to come in contact with them,” Santos stated ruefully, his aristocratic features mocking.
“I would guess there are days Travis wishes he didn’t know about us now.” The senator grinned back at Travis.
“I’m glad to know men such as you are there, if someone has to be, sir,” Travis stated.
“Suck-up.” Rhiannon rolled her eyes.