Page 7 of Lint Starts School


  Chapter Eight - Stone Age School? Really?

  Lint's adventures are over (for now). But maybe you've been reading the story and wondering what life was like for Stone Age boys and girls. Or maybe you've been wondering how long it took for human life to begin after the world was formed. You know it took a long time ago. But how long? 100 years? 1000 years? 10,000 years? Well, have you even planted a seed and waited for it to grow? Just when you have given up all hope, the seed starts to swell and a root appears. No? Or maybe you’ve stared at a blank piece of paper that is supposed to be your homework and wondered if you could get your mum/big brother/little sister/baby brother/dog to do it for you. Yes? And after everyone has refused to help, an idea starts to form. You write your first word. Next, there is a sentence. But your homework, is still so small, so fragile, so, well, weedy. It takes a long time for it to grow bigger.

  The story of the growth of modern man (that’s you and me), is a bit like a seed growing or you doing your home learning. Scientists think that life first began on this planet about 4,600 million years ago. But the first hominids (our human ancestors) didn’t appear until roughly 4 million years ago. That means the seed was doing nothing, for 4,556 million years! Or, to put it another way, you were staring at a blank page for 4,556 million years.

  It took another 3 million years for modern humans to develop. They are known as Homo Sapiens Sapiens, which means wise, wise man, (which must be a joke) and were different from another species of human who lived about the same time, Homo Sapiens Neanderthals. For reasons we can never be sure of, Homo Sapiens Neanderthals became extinct.

  Life for Homo Sapiens Sapiens was much more simple and dangerous than it is for us today. There were no shops, no police, no football, no ovens, no washing machines and no toilets (that we would recognise). What they did have was lots of trees, wild, dangerous, animals, and school. Almost all scientists and anthropologists (people who study and know a lot about Homo Sapiens Sapiens) would disagree with me about them going to school.

  But, I think, they must have had school. School didn’t need to be invented, right? All you need is one boring adult, and lots of children, and there you have it, a school. Pens, paper, desks, chairs all came later. The most essential ingredient is one adult who thinks they know better than everyone else. They don’t even need to be clever. It is never difficult to find such a person. I know many.

  So, in my version of life in Stone Age times there are lots of trees, parents who want to spoil your fun, children who know better, a few dangerous, wild animals and, of course, school.

  Coming Soon in the Stone Age School Series:

  Lint's New Teacher

  Lint and Hgh

  Lint Comes of Age

  If you want to tell me to hurry up, you can. Contact me on https://amlayet.co.uk/contactus.html

  Also by AM Layet

  Hat Trick Boy is selected to join local side Hammers FC, but his friends aren’t picked. He has to choose between his friends and his football, and he makes a mistake. He decides to join Hammers FC. He doesn't know his friends are about to set up the greatest junior football club ever, Hot Shots FC...

  This is a story about a girl called Hatty Ward who starts a newspaper, a boy called Joe Ward who tries to ruin the newspaper, and their classmate, Sophie Jones, who goes missing and becomes the main story in the newspaper. It is a very silly, but not very scary, thriller perfect for anyone who likes finding clues, solving puzzles, and being a bit silly.

  Booksfc

  Can't decide which book to read next?

  Why not get some help from the most ridiculous book review site ever at

  At https://booksfc.blogspot.co.uk/ there is a panel of experts who review the books. But actually they do more squabbling than reviewing.

  Here is one of their reviews:

  Welcome to Books FC where a panel of experts review some of the best children's books. The panel, in case you've forgotten, is:

  Mad Scientist: Expert in everything

  Party Rocker: Expert in being rude

  Striker: Expert in football and being a hooligan

  Flower Power: Expert in training

  The experts have been writing their Christmas wish lists. See if you can guess who wrote which wish:

  1.Einstein's brain

  2.A wand that actually works

  3.A ban on all polite words

  4.England winning the next football World Cup

  Poor old Mum's going to have a hard time going shopping for that lot. But don't worry. The experts have a plan B. If they don't get what they want for Christmas, they're going to take their Mum back to the Mum Shop and swap her for a new one. Now where did they get an idea like that from?

  The next book to face the panel of experts is The Mum Shop by Ceci Jenkinson. Oli, our hero, is not pleased with his Mum. She doesn't order enough pizza and she won't let him watch Real Blood Bath Murders. So, Oli takes her to the Mum Shop and swaps her for a new mum, Sid. All starts well. Sid also loves pizza and orders one straight away. Unfortunately neither Sid, nor Oli, have any money to pay for the pizza and that's only the start of their problems...

  Mad Scientist: Not another scientist bad guy! The villain in this book, Gertrude Swithin, used to be a science teacher. It's a conspiracy!

  Party Rocker: And no rude words in the entire book either. Definitely a conspiracy.

  Mad Scientist: Let's form a secret society to fight the conspiracy. The revolution statement of our society will be:

  1.All heroes and heroines must be scientists.

  2.All villains must be TV presenters or pop stars.

  Party Rocker: What!? You're on your own bud.

  Striker: Well, I just want to give this book 5 stars.

  Party Rocker: Actually me too. It was sick! It gets 5 stars just 'cause one of the mums turned up in a tank.

  Striker: And it gets 5 stars for the matcher machine, which I wanted to play with, and 5 stars for the revolution statement, which I wanted to rip up. I also really liked it because I really liked Oli; he was funny, and silly, and brave and cool and reminded me of me!

  Flower Power (starting to cry): I don't want to swap Mum...

  So, The Mum Shop scored 5 stars from those so called experts who actually bothered to vote. It seems anyone can be an expert these days...

 
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