YO-YO'S WEEKEND
David Brining
Copyright David Brining 2012
Featuring:
Yo-yo, a teenage ginger-nut
Mister Vanilla, a forty-stone jewel thief and criminal mastermind
Uncle Reefer, a bored boarding-house manager
Aunty Latch, his wife
Lily Gusset, a reverse cross-dresser
Katze, the kab driver
Mrs Lollipop, a bed-ridden widow
Baby, a talking blackbird
Doctor Molasses, a medical man
Matron Majeiski, Ooh Matron
Venus Periwinkle, Yo-yo's Mother
From The Wildcat Circus
Truss, the circus manager
Thyme, the ring-mistress
Rue, the painted lady and Thyme's sister
Ruff, a ball-bouncing bear
Dax and Jax, identical twins in a Hall of Mirrors
Catkin Silver, the Yuman Cannonball
The Lettuce Brothers, Chicory, Endive, Kos, Rocket, the clowns
The Czech Mates, Jezdec, Strelec and Vez, chess-playing trapeze artists
Jungle-Juiced Jake, a decrepit lion-tamer
Brian, a decrepit lion
The People of York
Constable Kipper, a beat policeman
Sigurd the Skull-Splitter, a Viking chieftain
A Ghost Walker
Martin Mizzenmast, a schoolboy and chorister and NOT a buttock-barer
Wee Jocko McTavish, a professional Scotsman
Eleazar Glenn, the two-hundred year old ghost of a six-year old child
King Richard III, pub signboard, waxwork and King of England from 1483 until 1485
William Etty R.A., a Victorian painter turned statue
Constantine the Great, a fourth century Roman Emperor turned statue
Wackem Thrashboy, a Victorian schoolmaster
The Severed Head of Sir Thomas Percy, Seventh Duke of Northumberland
Podgemeister and the Twiglet , brothers (or a rock band. If not, why not?)
Some feisty kids from Bootham School
An old coot whose flat cap gets pissed in
That nice woman from that there shop that sells ladies' requisites
Sir David Attenboroughs and him off the telly…
The voice of Chris Tarrant
Harry Gration and Christa Ackroyd
The voice of Magnus Magnussonsonsons
Her with the face like the back end of an old boot… you know which one!
Hamish, a chocolate Labrador
American, German and Japanese tourists, some ghosts and spirits, publicans, shop assistants, passers-by, school-teachers, Morris dancers and other assorted characters I've forgotten to list like that woman who had the little girl in the push-chair and someone else I can't remember…never mind! You'll find out!
Contents
First Fit
1. Arrivals: 1119 from Dewsbury
2. In Aunty Latch's COZEE NOOK
3. Into the City
4. The Circus Comes to Town
5. Rue's Magic Box
6. Ghost Walk
7. First Night
8. Morning
9. Monkgate
10. Bettys (est. 1919)
11. Wee Jocko McTavish
12. The King's Head
13. Dr Kirk's Magic Museum
14. Yo-yo's Little Brush
15. The Minster's Mystery Streaker
Second Fit
16. Mister Vanilla in the Hall of Mirrors
17. The Investigations of Constable Kipper
18. The Lettuce Brothers Leap into Action
19. Baby and the Bathwater
20. Second Night
21. A Walk on the Wild Side
22. Conversation with a Head
23. The Play of King Herod
24. The Face of Death
25. Doctor Molasses Comes to the Circus
Third Fit
26. Tea Dance
27. Through the Tunnel
28. Third Night
29. Kissing on a Gravestone
30a). Departure
30b). Departure
30c). Departure
FIRST FIT
Manchester Piccadilly d 0912 0938 0950
Huddersfield d 0945 1008 1020
Dewsbury d 1044
Manchester Victoria d 0848
Blackpool North d 0847
Halifax d 0945 1027
Leeds d 1017 1025 1038 1048 1054 1058 1107
Leeds Whitehall d
Cross Gates d 1032 1105
Garforth d 1037 1110 1116
East Garforth d 1039 1112
Micklefield d 1043 1116
South Milford d 1120
Selby d 1059 1132
Brough d 1117
Hull d 1135
Church Fenton d
Ulleskelf d
York a 1043 1100 1112 1119 1136
Scarborough a
Middlesbrough a 1227
Newcastle a 1207 1218