I was so freaking glad not to have Daddy Issues.
“Just take things slow,” I told her. “There’s so much going on right now. It’s fine to have some fun when we can, but it’s probably not the best time to be worrying about a guy.” Especially my brother.
“I know,” she said, probably just to appease me. She wrapped her arms around her waist and pulled her knees in tighter, still shaking.
“You should try to lay back down,” I told her.
“I don’t want Jacob to see me like this.”
I forced myself not to roll my eyes. “Just get back in the tent with Rylen, then.”
“But what if Tater thinks I’m avoiding him?”
Now I did roll my eyes. “You’re overthinking this. Tater is not going to care what you look like. He’s going to be just as hungover as you and everyone else up there. Just do what you need to do to feel better.”
“Always so logical,” she whispered. Followed by, “Oh, my head.”
I helped her to her feet and she held my arm as we walked up together. She stopped twice and bent over, looking like she was going to heave again. We finally made our way up to camp, and blessedly everyone was still asleep. Remy stared at both tents a few minutes before she made her way, hunched like an old lady, and climbed into Tater’s tent.
I rubbed my temples. Coffee. I needed caffeine stat. And though my gut was calling out for food too, I knew if I filled it with liquid I could trick it into shushing for a little while. I walked with care between sleeping bags and filled the tea kettle with water from a gallon jug. Then I turned on the gas burner and sat on a log to wait.
I felt eyes on me and was startled to see every single guy awake in their beds, watching me. Their faces appeared miserable: ashen skin, messy hair, arms splayed like they were too lethargic to do anything more than watch me.
“Um, hey,” I said. “You guys want coffee?”
Five sets of eyes widened.
“You got coffee, for real?” Devon asked.
“It’s going to be weak, but yeah,” I told him. I had to ration it.
Slowly, the guys stretched and sat up, looking achy, and went off in different directions to use the trees. Sean came out of his tent, looking fresh and well rested. We gave each other a polite nod before he left to find a tree, too.
When the water was hot, I pulled out our paper cups and poured for everyone, putting half a scoop of instant coffee. I also tore open a packet of sugar and poured it in mine. It was weaker and less sweet than I liked it, but it was still so good. I didn’t know how I would survive when this stuff ran out. These guys had no idea how lucky they were I was willing to share.
When I saw Tater practically stumble out of his tent, I jumped up with my coffee and ran to meet him. He put up a palm to stop my progress, while holding his head with his other hand.
“Let me pee first.”
I waited impatiently. When he came back, still disheveled, I took him by the wrist and pulled him down the trail out of ear shot of the others.
As I was about to speak, he snatched my coffee and drank half. I snatched it back and was pissed when a little sloshed over the edge.
“Tater! You cannot mess with Remy’s mind!”
He stared at me blankly. “We’re just having fun.”
“No. It’s never just fun with her. You’re going to hurt her and make everything awkward.”
“Ah, come on. How do you know she won’t be the one to hurt me?” He gave me his droopy puppy eyes.
I smacked his arm then pointed at him. “I am immune to your cuteness. No more hookups unless you really do like her.”
“Amb—”
“I’m serious! I will kick your ass, Tater!”
He reached for my coffee again, and I curled my arm and body around it like freaking Gollum protecting his precious, and snarled, “Go make your own.”
I heard footsteps and looked up, still curled around my paper cup. The image of Rylen in fitted nylon running pants and no shirt made me straighten so fast my coffee sloshed over again. Damn it!
I licked my hand.
Tater walked away, narrowly dodging a punch from Rylen, who made his way down to me. He kept coming when I thought he would stop, ending up way too close. Rylen had a way of sliding into my personal bubble and making my skin prickle with heat. His head tilted down toward mine and he spoke in a low voice.
“I’m sorry about last night, Pepper. Again.” He tugged on his earlobe and gave his head a shake. “I don’t know what the fuck is wrong with me.”
I brought the coffee up to my lips and gave a shrug. “Nothing to be sorry about.”
“I said too much.” He straightened and ran a hand through his hair, which was longer than I’d seen it in years.
I didn’t want to relive the conversation, but I needed to take away his worries so we could move past this apology. “You obviously needed someone to talk to, and I’m glad you felt comfortable enough to confide in me, drunk or not.”
He let out a dry laugh. “Definitely drunk.”
“Yeah, well.” I shrugged again. “You weren’t alone.” I downed the rest of my coffee, then felt sad that it was gone.
“Thanks,” he whispered.
I opened my mouth to respond, but a high-pitched shriek split the air. Remy.
Rylen and I sprinted up the path to the camp and found all of the guys in a semi-circle and Remy in the tent entrance, staring down. I pushed through. Her terrified eyes went up to me and back to the ground. “It’s a scorpion!”
I looked down at the nearly-translucent beige creature, about three inches long. Then I ran forward and stomped it. Remy screamed and the guys hollered. I felt it crunch through my sneaker bottom and I shivered all over. I lifted my foot, but the damn thing was still moving, so I proceeded to do the Mexican hat dance on that sucker until it no longer moved. I looked up in to the guys’ faces. They stared at me.
“Pussies,” I muttered, kicking the scorpion to the side so Remy could get out.
She grasped me in a hug. “My hero!”
“That thing could’ve killed somebody,” Devon said. “I ain’t sleeping on that ground no more. I call the backseat of the van.”
“Scorpion stings are like bee stings,” I said. “They’re not going to kill you.”
Still, they all looked skeptical. I turned to Texas Harry. “Don’t you have scorpions in Texas?”
“Yes, ma’am,” he said. “But I use ’em for target practice. Didn’t think the little lady would take kindly to me shooting by her feet.”
“Thanks for that,” Remy said.
“It’s rattlesnakes you need to watch out for,” I told the group at large. “I don’t have any antivenom, so if you get bitten you’re screwed. That really could kill you, or do major damage.”
“I call passenger seat in the van,” New York Josh said.
“Or,” I said over everyone’s sudden chatter. “The other tent will be free tonight. Four of you can fit in there. Remy and Tater will be back in the other tent with me and Ry.”
Remy pushed her hair behind her ear and looked down as several guys chuckled. A pink blush spread across her face.
“You’re such a mean camp Mama,” Short Matt said. “Taking the fun out of everything.” He gave me a green-eyed wink.
I winked back. “Don’t forget it.” I looked around at their miserable faces and slumping bodies. “And in the meantime, Mean Mama will make you something to eat. After this, you’re on your own.”
The plan that evening was to return to the DRI “Safe House” area to do more recon. We needed to figure out exactly where we would set off a fire, and where our people needed to be stationed during it, and how to best get to those areas without detection.
“I’m going this time,” I said during our early dinner. We were down to two meals a day: a late breakfast and an early dinner, with no snacks in between.
“I’m not staying here alone,” Remy told me.
“Then come with us,” I s
aid.
She peered down at her salty square cracker, and I could tell she didn’t want to come, but her fear of being here alone was greater. A strand of her hair fell and brushed her arm. Remy jumped and slapped her arm, then relaxed when she saw it was just her hair. I had to giggle. She glared at me, but eventually broke into a smile. She’d been freaked out about the scorpion all day.
“Man, I haven’t shit in two days,” Tater blurted out of nowhere.
“Right?” New York Josh said to Tater. The others nodded.
Remy crinkled her nose. “TMI.”
“Your body needs everything you’re intaking,” I said.
“What are you, a doctor?” New York Josh asked. I was starting to be able to read him. He always sounded like an asshole, but he wasn’t trying to be. He was just naturally a hardass with dry wit.
“She’s an RN,” Rylen said. “A paramedic.”
New York Josh gave me an appreciative once-over. “All right. That explains the fearlessness.”
My chest heated at the compliment and his lingering look. Remy was right—he was good looking with those Italian features.
“Hella good to have a nurse on hand,” Tall Mark said.
Texas Harry slapped the back of his head.
I savored my last cracker and brushed my hands off. It was time to get ready to go. I was excited to finally have a hand in the scouting and planning.
We cleaned up and got ourselves ready, gathering all the gear we’d need. Remy and I both put our hair up in ponytails. I saw her hands trembling, and took her fingers in mine. “Everything will be fine,” I told her. “We’re just looking tonight, ‘kay?”
“Okay,” she whispered. Her eyes drifted from my face over my shoulder and stopped. I turned to see Tater approaching and felt Remy’s hand tighten around mine.
Tater kept his gaze firmly on me. “You ready?”
“Yeah.” I waited for him to acknowledge Remy too. When he didn’t, I said, “We’re ready.”
He gave me a nod and left to join the guys. Remy’s face fell.
“He hasn’t looked at me or talked to me all day.”
Shit, shit, shit. He’d taken my advice not to lead her on, but blatantly ignoring her was going to cause problems too.
“I don’t know what to say about him, Rem. Last night you guys were having fun. Today, he’s focused on trying to break our families out. Don’t take offense, ‘kay?”
She continued to frown. “’kay.”
We took two vehicles: the guys’ minivan, and Mom’s sedan. Tater and Rylen sat in front with Tater driving. Remy held my hand in the backseat the whole way. I had to admit, I shared in her fears now. The moment we’d left state park land, a sudden vulnerability overtook us. I found myself staring out of the window, watching for any sign of other cars or people or life, in general. The others seemed to be doing the same.
The sun drooped behind distant mountains, blanketing us in cool dimness. We drove slowly, trying not to kick up too much dust. Tater and Texas Harry parked behind a hill with a few scraggly evergreens, hidden from the main road, but within walking distance of the gas station. We all got out, closing doors behind us with care.
My heart picked up and leveled off at a quick thump that forced my breaths to become shallow. We weren’t safe out here. My flight or fight instinct was begging me to flee, but not alone. I needed all of my loved ones to flee with me, away from this evil sense of dread. A strong hand enveloped my shoulder and I looked up at Rylen.
“It’s all right,” he said.
I took a deep breath and shook my arms out. The darkness would not leave me.
A longing deep and powerful hit me right in the gut, stopping my breath—it was a longing for my parents, for Abuela. I closed my eyes and years of unconditional love filled me. The longing stretched into a bone-deep need for my family to be one again. My jaw was clenched tight. Icy fear for them hit me in a rush, making my eyes burst open. A violent shudder overtook me and I hated, absolutely hated, the DRI for making me feel this way.
Rylen, Tater, and Remy were watching me.
“Amber, calm down,” Tater said. “Everything’s okay.”
“No,” I whispered. “We need to get them out of there.”
“I know,” he said. “And we will. If we can get all the info we need tonight, we’ll be able to break them out tomorrow or the next day.”
I forced another deep breath. I had to shake away the bad feelings or I would only be a hindrance. “Okay. I’m sorry. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”
Tater bent his knees to come eye-to-eye with me and said, “You’re solid. Gimme some.” He stuck out his fist and I bumped it with mine. Remy shifted next to us, her arms wrapping around her waist. Tater looked at her and hesitated, like he wanted to bump knuckles with her, too, but instead he just gave an awkward half-smile and turned away to jog to the other guys.
Remy frowned. “What the hell? I have cooties now?”
“He doesn’t know how to act,” Rylen said. He gave Remy an apologetic look. “Let’s go.”
The night was filled with a lot of walking and hiking, most of it spent hunched over and trying to be as small and stealthy as possible while we sweated out every drop we’d had to drink that day. If we’d tried to do this in the daytime with the sun shining, I’m afraid some of our group would have passed out.
We finally worked our way pretty close. I felt worthless, not knowing a lot of the military lingo they used as they chose coordinates of the best places to station themselves and who would go where. All I could do was stare down at the camp in the valley, which looked so small from where we were.
A full moon shone above us, along with a clear sky of twinkling stars. It gave us just enough light to make out the maps.
“That hill, right there,” Matt said, “would be perfect for the fire.”
“It’s too far,” Mark countered. “This one’s better.”
“That’s too close—”
All at once we lifted our heads and listened. A sound was coming from far off, like wind or a whirring whistle.
Rylen whispered, “Jet. Get down.”
Everyone scuttled, trying to find trees or rocks or bushes to anchor ourselves near. And sure enough, within a minute a plane flew over and it was so low, so loud, that it shook the ground beneath us.
“Fucking hell, it’s Air Force!” Rylen said. “Two fighters!”
Mark started to jump up and holler, but Matt grabbed him and yanked him back down. “Stay put, brah. Wait and see what they do.”
The Air Force! Absolute unadulterated joy poured through me and I nearly laughed. The Air Force was here to stop the DRI!
From my vantage point I could see the camp. To my glee, Drips and Derps were running for the camp gates. They exited and locked the gate behind them. They rushed toward the white vans outside.
“They’re leaving!” I whispered loudly.
Mere seconds after they’d piled into the vans and sped away, loud sounds came from the camp. Abruptly, a sea of people poured forth from the building, like they’d broken out of it, and they were all screaming, running for the gates.
“Oh, my God, everyone is freaking out,” I said. Our group rushed over to see. “They’re going to trample each other!” Remy said. “We have to go down there!”
To my surprise, nobody objected. As a group, we came out over our hill and began rushing down the steep decline. I heard the whir of the jets coming back. This time we all cheered when we saw them getting closer. They’d chased away the Drips and Derps. Now we could get these people out and find out exactly what the hell was going on with this country.
We were still a good distance away, sprinting, but even from afar it was clear there was panic at the camp gates. Some were trying to climb over, but the tops were circled in barbed wire. I wanted to yell for them to wait a damn second and we’d be there to help, but they wouldn’t have been able to hear us.
As the jets neared, hovering lower enough to get a goo
d look, I fought the urge to cover my ears against the noise of them. But then I wished I had. And I wished I’d covered my eyes too.
The flash of light hit first, and it seemed like forever before the sound blasted us backward onto our asses. Heat came next, rolling over us, mixed with dust and dirt and rocks. I covered my head and rolled to my stomach. A sudden flashback of the hospital bombing caught me in a giant, tight fist.
But this could not be a bombing. The U.S. Air Force was here. Had the DRI set off bombs within the camp?
The camp . . . holy fucking shit.
I pushed to my knees and tried to open my eyes, but it was like a windstorm. I couldn’t see a thing. I forced myself upward, keeping an arm across my face, and moved in the direction we’d been going. At least, I was pretty sure it was the right direction.
I heard coughing behind me, and moans.
“Amber?” I heard Remy say, but I couldn’t stop. I couldn’t go back. She was alive and okay, but the camp . . .
“Amber!” she screamed.
“I’m fine!” I yelled over my shoulder. “Stay here.”
“I got you,” I heard Tater say to her.
Once I knew I was moving in the right direction, I picked up my pace. I pulled my T-shirt up over my nose so I could breathe, and I jogged. Seconds later I heard feet hitting the dirt to my right, then my left, then behind me.
“They dropped a bomb,” I heard Rylen say to my left. “They dropped a fucking bomb on camp.”
“Are you sure?” I yelled.
“I saw it fall, too,” Texas Harry shouted.
Oh, my God. No. I dropped my shirt and flat out ran. Sand whipped my face, but I couldn’t feel it.
Please God.
Not this.
Not my family.
No. NO.
I refused to let it be true.
My eyes burned from the sand. Tears streamed down and I coughed as I ran. My foot hit something hard and I stumbled, going to one knee. Rylen hiked me back up by the arm and I kept running.