"Uncle Roy," I whispered. "Uncle Roy?"
He lifted his head slowly and smiled. "Hey. Princess, how ya doin'?" he asked. I gazed around.
"Where am I?"
"In the hospital."
"Where's Harley?" I asked desperately. holding my breath, terrified of his response.
He stared at me a moment and then he jerked his head slightly to the right,
"He's in the next room. He was a lot worse off than you. He's still in a coma." he said.
"What did they do to us?"
"Doctor said something about poison mushrooms in something you two must've ate. Another day or so and I would most likely have been too late."
"Is he going, to be all right?"
"Yeah, they think so. They hope so," he added, to be a little more honest.
"How did you find us?" I asked.
"I searched Harley's room after you told Rain you were coming home and didn't. I found this guy's name and address and just set out. When I got there, I saw Harley's cycle behind the house. I spotted it before I knocked on the door. Good reconnaissance. My army training, I guess," he continued with a quick smile.
"Anyway, when that man told me Harley and you had left. I pushed my way in. Some weird woman was running a lit candle up and down this door in the hallway as if she was burning something away. I looked back at him and then at her. Something in his face told me I had better move quickly.
''Where are they?' I demanded. He looked like he was going to cry. I turned to the woman and repeated the question and she said. 'They're with the devil.'
"I tried the door and saw it was locked. I demanded the key and no one moved, so I stepped back and kicked it in. The old man just went into the living room and sat in a chair as if it was all no big deal. Just another day in hell or something.
"The rest you know now. Of course. I told it all to the police and they got them. That guy was Harley's grandfather," he said shaking his head. "His grandfather! Can you believe it?"
"We know who he was. At first, he pretended to be his father. His father was killed running from the police after he had committed a robbery."
"Yeah, the police filled me in on some of the family history."
"What about my mother and father. Uncle Roy?"
"They're on their way here. Should be here in a few hours."
"I've made such a mess of things."
"You? Why you?"
"I shouldn't have agreed to go along," I said. "Then he might not have gone."
"Wrong," he declared with the tone of a gong. "He would have gone without you. I was no help to him in his grief, And then he would have been up here all by himself and no one would have come in time to save him. Summer. You don't blame yourself. If anything, you kept him alive," he said.
I wanted to believe Uncle Roy. I knew he was telling me all of it to make me feel better, but maybe, just maybe there was some truth to it. too.
Later in the day. Daddy and Mommy arrived. I cried and kept telling them how sorry I was for making all this trouble, but they were just so happy to see me, they wouldn't listen to anything. Daddy went off to confer with the doctors and Mommy remained with me.
They checked into a motel nearby and came to the hospital every day for the next two days. On the second day. Harley woke. He was very weak but slowly he was able to realize where he was and remember all that had happened.
The night of day two, after Mommy and Daddy had left to get some rest. I got out of my bed. I wasn't supposed to. but I wanted to see Harley. I waited until there was no one in the hallway and then I went to his room. but I didn't go in. I stood inside the doorway, frozen, silent, hardly breathing.
Uncle Roy had his head resting against his palms, his elbows on his knees. He was still there, sitting at Harley's bedside.
He was crying.
Uncle Roy-- the gruff, powerful giant who lumbered across our property and his, who ruled with firmness over his work crews, who didn't ever seem to offer Harley any comfort or warmth-- was sobbing at Harley's bedside.
Harley woke and turned to him. Then he reached out and touched Uncle Roy's head and Uncle Roy lifted his eyes and they looked at each other.
"Thanks for coming for us," Harley said.
"Hell, boy, you did a dumb thing."
"I know:'
"Your momma would have hated me for eternity," Uncle Roy said. And then he paused and said. "You don't need to go running all over the country looking for a daddy, Harley. I'll be there for you. We both lost a lot, but we still got each other if you want," he said.
Harley was weak, but he managed a bright, strong smile, Then Roy rose to hug him and hold him.
I was crying so hard. I didn't think I could remain quiet a moment longer so I quickly retreated and returned to my room.
There were rainbows. I thought. There were still rainbows.
.
We both grew stronger. Daddy told me that the poisonous mushroom was the kind that could do a great deal of damage to liver and kidneys, but we were rescued in time for the effects of the poison to be reversed. He had learned from the police that Suze believed it would drive the evil spirit from us. Her mad beliefs, her paranoia about the demons coming to steal her dead son's soul was almost understandable, but Harley 's grandfather's need to avoid all reality was not.
"He was selfish," Daddy said. "He was willing to sacrifice his own flesh and blood to satisfy that need. From what I've learned, he most likely drove his wife to her death as well. It's all going to be particularly hard for Harley. No one wants to think he's inherited all this craziness.'"
"He hasn't. Daddy. Harley's not anything like that," I insisted.
"I know. We're just going to have to help him see that, too," he said wisely.
Uncle Roy had already begun to do that. lecturing Harley about his mother's good qualities and telling him that's the side of his family he's inherited.
We had some time together alone before I was finally discharged by our doctors. I sat in his room and watched him sip tea and try to hold down some toast and jam. He paused and with narrow eyes, turned to me.
"Roy told me how you were still blaming yourself for all this. Summer. He's right. If it wasn't far you, I'd probably be history. You might never even have known what happened to me. I'd just have disappeared. forever. Don't you dare blame yourself for anything,"
I smiled at him. "Okay, Harley."
"Stop making us feel we're just saying it to make you feel better, too,' he ordered.
"Okay."
"So," he said smiling, "where do you want to go next? I'll shine up the cycle,"
I laughed and held his hand. He was tired again and had to nap. I kissed him before I returned to my room, promising to return in a few hours. When I did. I read to him from the newspapers or we watched some television together.
Another day passed and the doctors decided I was well enough to be discharged. They wanted to keep Harley a few more days to observe and be sure he was free of any internal damage.
"Hurry and get well," I told him.
Roy remained behind with him. and Daddy and Mommy and I returned home.
It had never been so wonderful to set foot in my own house, my own room, to breathe the air, to see the flowers and the lake and hear Mrs. Geary's lecture about being foolish. I even enjoyed her pressure to make me eat everything, every single drop. Of course. I couldn't. It took a while for my appetite to return. but I had no doubts that it would.
Mommy hovered around me even more than usual. It was funny. I thought, how now she was the one nervous about my health, my illnesses, my every cough and sneeze. Roles had been reversed, at least for a while.
My grandparents came to visit. Even Aunt Alison showed up and looked genuinely impressed. When everyone left us, however. she told me she was impressed for different reasons.
"I never thought you had the guts to do something like that. I always thought you were a Daddy's littlegirl."
"It doesn't take guts to do something stu
pid. Aunt Alison." "Just think of it as an adventure." she said. "That's what I do."
"Are you happier because of that?" I shot back at her.
She glared at me for a moment.
"You know, you're just like your mother," she said.
"Thank you."
"Oh forget it," she cried, throwing her hands up and changing the subject to tell me about this young doctor she had met and begun to date.
When I asked her if she loved him, she thought a moment and said. "I wouldn't know if I did.'
She looked very sad and for the first time. I think I truly felt sorry for her. It was almost like never being able to taste anything or hear beautiful music Or smell the flowers in spring. She was incapable of being truly, deeply happy. She was being honest. She wouldn't recognize love. Something was missing and she knew it and mourned it and was bitter because of it.
Mommy had lost the use of her legs, but she wasn't nearly as bitter or unhappy, I thought.
Yes, thank you. Thank you for comparing me to her. I concluded.
When Harley returned, he was supposed to take it easy, but he was restless and didn't sit still or relax.
"I did enough of that in the hospital,'" he complained when everyone chastised him.
Uncle Roy tried to be gruff again, but his confessions and his revelation of love seemed to have taken the hardness out of him and Harley knew it. All he would do is smile at him.
"The boy's stubborn through and through." Uncle Roy told Mommy. "Headstrong, even after all this. He didn't learn a thing."
"He's more like you than you care to admit. Roy Arnold," Mommy told him. "There is something stronger than blood."
He looked at her.
"And what's that. Rain?"
"Love," she said. "Love."
Their eyes locked. How many, many memories flowed between them-- good ones as well as all the bad, all the straggles, all the tears and vet all the smiles, for there had to be happy times.
The way they spoke about Momma Arnold clearly made me think that was so.
The last days of summer were upon us quickly. Harley had been granted admittance to another college, one in Rhode Island. It was a four-year school and it had the program in architecture he wanted. He and Uncle Roy asked Daddy's advice and together they all agreed Harley would attend.
My heart was asked to be so many things the day Harley left for school. It was asked to be full of pride for him, to be happy for him and his
opportunity, but it couldn't help thumping with sadness. We wouldn't see each other for a long time.
"I'll be back for Thanksgiving," he promised. "And I'll call and write you. Don't fall in love with someone new as soon as you start school," he warned.
"What about you and all those college girls you're going to meet?"
"I won't have time."
"Right," I said.
We both stood on the dock and looked out at the lake. A blackbird lifted from a thick tree branch and glided over the water before soaring up and away.
"Quickly. Harley, make a wish," I cried.
He laughed.
I closed my eyes and did so.
"Did you wish?"
"I can't tell you or it won't come true," he said. "I don't need you to tell me. I heard you." I said.
He smiled and kissed me. Then Uncle Roy came out of our house.
Mommy and Daddy came out after him. Daddy stood next to her on the portico. Harley ran up to kiss Mommy Goodbye and shake Daddy's hand. Then he got into the car. I stood there, watching and thinking. Aunt Glenda's watching too. She's standing right beside me. I can feel her.
They started away and then stopped and Harley got out. "Hey," he called to me.
"What?"
"I heard your wish, too. After the blackbird. We'll make it happen," he said and got back into the car.
It slipped slowly out of sight below the hill and was gone. I looked up at Mommy and Daddy. They were holding hands and looking after the car. Then they turned toward me, concern in their eyes.
I took a deep breath and smiled to myself. I'm all right. I thought. Don't worry. There are no goodbyes.
Not really.
Not for people like us.
Epilogue
.
I suppose all my life I've been afraid of
promises. A promise is a way of exposing your heart, whether you're the one giving it or the one accepting it. "Let's not make any promises and we'll never be disappointed in each other." That's what I told the boys I dated.
Harley and I kept up our correspondence and our relationship while I attended and finished high school. My grandfather in England wanted me to attend college in London. Mommy. Daddy and I talked about it at length. and Mommy told me about all her wonderful experiences there when she had studied at the school of drama.
It did sound exciting and my grandfather Larry was so anxious for me to come and live with him.
"Even if it's only for a year or two." Mommy told me. "it's a worthwhile experience for you. Summer."
I knew how hard it would be for her to be so far away from me. so I knew she meant every word. She wanted the good things for me. She wanted me to taste what I had never tasted, see what I had never seen, hear what I had never heard. Experience, wide and wonderful, was so very important.
Maybe it was because her opportunities had been cut off so early in her life. Maybe she wanted to live them through me.
Whatever her reasons, she was very convincing and in the end. I decided to do it.
Harley was a junior in college, already deep in his major. We corresponded while I was away, of course, but suddenly, his letters stopped coming. I thought he had found someone else. I wrote him a few times and then I stopped. too.
We drifted apart and when we saw each other the following summer, we were both embarrassed by it, fumbling for excuses. Toward the end of my school year. I did meet a very nice young man from London. His father was a member of Parliament and because of that. I got to see many royal events I would never have experienced.
However, our relationship thinned when I left to spend the summer at home. He met someone new and was practically engaged the next time I saw him. I didn't feel bad. I felt it was meant to be. No promises. No heartbreaks. No tears.
I was able to return early enough the following year to go with everyone to Harley's college graduation. He had done very well and won some awards in architecture. The result was he landed a job with a prestigious firm in Richmond. He seemed to have grown taller, firmer, far more mature. Uncle Roy was very proud, and they were truly like father and son. We were all proud.
Late July of that year. Mommy became very sick with another one of her infections. She nearly died. It seemed to age Daddy. It drove home in more dramatic and vivid terms just how fragile she had become and how easily Death could come sauntering by and pluck her out of our home. If he was a nervous Nelly before. he was twice one now, and she bawled him out often for it.
"I'm not going anywhere so soon. Austin." she assured him. "so stop treating me like thin china. Go to work,"
Finally, he backed off.
Mommy and I spent our afternoons as usual, reading. talking. just enjoying the lake, the birds and the soft breeze whenever it came. I was taking a summer class in French literature, and we often talked about the books. She had read most of them, but reread them with me.
I had a few dates with some boys I met at summer school, but nothing came of any of that. I couldn't help wondering what would really become of me.
In mid-August we received word from Grandmother Megan that Aunt Alison had eloped with a stockbroker who worked on Wall Street. He had gotten her a job in a major hotel in their business department, and they had a very nice apartment on the East Side of Manhattan. One weekend she appeared with him. His name was Brad Richards and he seemed remarkably substantial and down-to-earth for someone Aunt Alison would choose.
"Maybe she's finally growing up." Mommy said afterward, "Maybe she's just tired and a
fraid."
We're all afraid. I thought. Deep down inside ourselves, no matter how successful we are or how brave we seem, we're all re ally afraid.
I had decided to finish my schooling in the States and had transferred to the University of Virginia. A week before I was to go. Harley appeared. He hadn't been home for some time. Uncle Roy had gone to see him a few times and always had nice things to report.
Harley drove up in a late-model car. He looked prosperous, successful and so grown up and
established. I almost didn't recognize him. I was down at the lake, sitting in a beach chair. reading. Mommy had gone in with Mrs. Geary and Daddy was at his office.
The sky was partly cloudy and there was a very nice breeze. It was one of those especially pleasant days I had learned to value deeply. I heard Harley's car. but I didn't know it was he. He stopped in front of my house and got out. He waved and I realized who it was and waved back. Then he walked down to me and we hugged hello. He was dressed in a sports jacket and slacks, but he sat on the grass and looked out at the lake.
"How have you been?" I asked.
"Busy.Im building a mall in Richmond."
"Wow."
"I hardly have enough time to eat these days," he said.
"But you're enjoying every moment. right?"
"Every moment." he said smiling. "Well, almost." he added after a beat.
"Oh?"
"All work and no play makes Harley a dull boy."
"Don't you play?"
"Not enough, not these days. I woke up this morning and stared at the ceiling and thought, look at me. I'm chasing the great American dream."
"So? What's wrong with that?"
"Nothing," he said. He plucked a blade of grass. "A long time ago, it seems, you and I stood by this lake and made a wish neither of us revealed. Remember?"
"Yes."
"We've traveled a long, winding road. At least I have, and here I am, back at the spot." he said looking around.
"So?" I said laughing.
"I never told you why I stopped writing you, calling you, that year."
"You didn't have to Harley. We didn't owe each other anything."
"Yes we did, and that's why I stopped.'"
"I don't understand," I said closing my book and turning to him.