“She dumped me. At this point, she probably doesn’t care how I feel.”
“That girl loves you, regardless of what she told you.” My mom pressed a palm to my cheek. “Ask yourself this one question and forget about everything else. When you’re together, do you complete each other and make each other stronger? Or are you better when you’re apart? That’s all that matters.”
I smiled, so grateful all over again that she was here and alive. Because, yes, I believed Autumn and I made a good team. We had each other’s backs and, amazingly, no matter how much time we spent together, we never grew tired of each other. I didn’t want to be without her. Hell, if I had any say in it, I wouldn’t be without her. And I was about to make a big gamble that she felt the same way. “I love you, Mom.”
“I know.” She patted my cheek. “Now, if I’m not mistaken, you have something you need to do.”
“Before you do that,” Renzo’s fingers wrapped around my arm, “you should know that Autumn knew my secret for maybe a couple of hours. I asked her to give me some time, which she did.”
“Fair enough.” I nudged my dad in the arm with a fist. “I’ll catch you guys in a little while.”
He grabbed my fist, held it for a moment, then let me go. He didn’t have to say it. I felt his words with that one gesture. And I was grateful to have him back too. I flashed him a smile and made my way to the palace.
Chapter THIRTY
Autumn
With too much downtime, Alura had convinced King Cedric to allow her into his weapons room. She’d been in there for twenty minutes. Bored, antsy, and anxious over how Zack was getting along with his parents, I needed Alura to help take my mind off Zack and how lonely I was without him. “Alura, are you okay?” I called out.
She popped her head through the doorway. “Guns and knives, Autumn. I’m more than okay. Now leave me alone.” Her eyes twinkled before she disappeared again.
Cedric sat glued to the chair at his desk and hadn’t looked my way during my quick chat with Alura. Apparently he’d been swallowed by a mountain of paperwork.
I picked up the wolf-head paperweight, knocking it against the desk in the process.
He stopped squinting and peered up at me from his stack of papers. “Bored?”
I rolled my shoulders. “Just antsy.”
“Problem?”
“Not sure.” I rolled the paperweight between my palms. “Been thinking about my parents. My mom’s texts have been short and sometimes she takes hours to answer. She told you they’d be arriving tomorrow?”
“Yes.” His gaze stayed trained on me, like he expected me to interrupt him as soon as he’d immersed himself in work again. He wasn’t far off.
I bent forward, rested my elbows on his desk, and dropped my chin in my palms. “Are Ulric and his men after my parents?”
His mouth flattened to a straight line. “From the little I’ve gathered from your father, that appears to be the case.”
The muscles in my shoulders wound up. I’d suspected as much, but was hoping my imagination had gone on a useless rampage. If my parents were indeed running from some jacked-up werewolf, they’d want to keep running.
But they couldn’t avoid a fight forever, could they? Knowing they were in so much more danger, would they still insist on taking me? Could I let them leave, fully aware I may never see them again?
“I’m sorry, Autumn,” Cedric said. “I’ll help any way I can.”
“Thank you.” I buried my face in my palms and squashed the urge to cry. If I couldn’t go with my parents and opted not to join SWAAST, where would I go?
The door banged open and Zack burst into the Cedric’s office, his forehead creased in the center. “I need to talk to you.”
Wanting to put off any conversation while he was that intense, I picked up the wolf-head paperweight again and flipped it around. “About what?”
“You and me.”
My stomach did a somersault. God, just looking at him made me want him. And I didn’t want to want him. I examined the label at the bottom of the weight. “I thought we already covered that.”
“Yeah, we did.” He’d stopped breathing and I knew he was holding back something big. I held my breath too.
“Well...” Cedric rose and rounded his desk. Damn, I’d forgotten he was sitting there. “I need to speak to Dathan on an urgent matter. I’ll be back in a few minutes.”
Cedric disappeared and I stood, ready to bolt. I couldn’t be alone with Zack. I was this-close to confessing how much I loved him. But what good would that do when his dad didn’t want me anywhere near Zack and might not let me join SWAAST anyway? And if I were to be honest with myself about our situation, a future breakup was inevitable. Why pick up where we left off only to end it tomorrow when I leave with my parents?
And if he truly cared about me, he wouldn’t have let me go so easily. “You know what? I need to finish packing.”
Alura zipped out of the weapons room and halted next to us. “She finished packing last night.” She wrinkled her nose at me. “Sorry.” And then she zoomed out into the hallway, leaving us truly alone.
“I have plenty of other things to do.” I rolled my eyes toward the ceiling. “And it doesn’t include hashing out the problems of a failed relationship.” I made another attempt to get past him.
“The thing is...” He sidestepped, blocking me from marching by. “You’re quite good at faking it. Oscar-worthy. But no matter how hard you try, you can’t make me believe that after everything we’ve been through, you could end it that way.”
I rolled my eyes and blew my bangs off my forehead. “Do we have to do this right now?”
“This,” he wagged his finger between us, “can’t be one-sided, Autumn. The last few weeks had to mean something to you too. It meant so much that you’d risk your life for me when Daniel wanted to make a deal. And when Charles became a threat, you offered yourself up to save me. Same with Renzo. No one does that sort of thing for someone unless they really care about them.”
My mouth went dry. What could I say to Zack to get him to back off? “Maybe I did it because it was the right thing to do.”
“Or maybe you did it because you care.” He watched me a long moment. “I thought we were the beginning of a legend, you know? That decades or centuries from now, they’d be talking about us the way they do Hannah and Eli. How we defied the werewolves, stood up for what we believed in and because of our devotion, we were willing to die as humans.”
Legend... Us? He cared so much for me that he saw us together centuries from now? I might’ve believed that, except he’d never told me he loved me.
He chewed the inside of his mouth a moment before focusing on me again. “I’m going to put myself out there. I—”
“Zack.” I hardened my voice. “It’s over. Any feelings we may have had are the very thing that’s going to get us killed. You’re better off meeting a hot werewolf girl and falling madly in love. You can team up and fight werewolf tyranny.” I gave a cynical laugh.
“There’s just one problem with that.” He took a step forward. I backed up and he closed the distance until the warmth from his body seeped into mine. “I don’t want anyone else.”
Blood thundered through my ears. I turned away, leaning a hip against the desk to steady myself. He needed to go away, because I couldn’t let him back in again only to say good-bye to him tomorrow. “Well, I won’t be around so you’re going to have to work it out.”
“Autumn.” His low guttural sound burrowed through my armor. “We agreed to stay together until the end when we had no choice but to separate. We made a deal.”
I threw my head back in frustration and stared at the ceiling. “In case you weren’t paying attention, this is the end. My parents will be here soon and then I’m leaving.”
He shook his head. “The end is when one of us drives away. Yes, your parents could show up and stay three minutes before taking you away. But that’s tomorrow, not now.”
He
had me there. Except I’d still have to go through the agony of our breakup all over again. I didn’t have much more fight in me, and every muscle, and every cell in my body, strained to be closer to him. “Zack, you don’t want this.”
“I disagree.” He inched closer, but didn’t touch me. My nerve endings fired to life. “With you, I’m better. I think I make you better too. And we don’t know what will happen tomorrow, so why should we give up now?”
I flinched, flipping around and facing away, folding my arms over my chest. For all his insistence, he never mentioned love. Regardless, he was hurting. It was one thing to inflict pain on myself. Quite another to torture the guy I loved.
Heat emanated from his body as he came up behind me and swept his hands past my waist, splaying his hands over my belly. The sound of his quickened pulse flooded my ears. “I’m not going to give up without a fight so you may as well cave now.”
The more he pushed, the more I wanted him. My powers of resistance waned and if this was our last night together, I wasn’t going to waste it. I wasn’t even sure anymore if being without him was actually the noble thing to do.
Or did I want to be wrong so I could have him? Slowly, I circled toward him and his hands slid to my hips. I covered his hands with my own, hesitating. Should I disengage or pull him closer?
As I blinked slowly, in that brief moment time stopped. My heart stuttered, skipped a beat, and my bottom lip quivered as I gazed into his deep green eyes. Zack had said he wasn’t going to give up and I’d never wanted him to. I couldn’t believe I’d ever considered wasting my last hours with him. “Okay.”
His kiss was a blaze of pent-up fury, grief, and anxiety, and I felt it to my toes. I matched his force, my fingers diving into his hair and I propelled us against the wall. He moaned into my mouth, lifting me up so my legs could snake around his hips. Then his mouth freed mine and he buried his face in my hair.
I clung to him, soaking up his woodsy scent, the way his heart thumped and his unsteady exhale. “I don’t want to be without you.” After what I’d put him through, he needed to hear that.
“I know.” His mouth came crashing down on mine again and he carried me to the room I’d shared with Alura.
Somehow the future didn’t seem so scary and uncertain, knowing Zack cared so much for me. But after being together like this again, how the hell was I supposed to let him go tomorrow?
Chapter THIRTY-ONE
Autumn
“Autumn,” Zack whispered the next morning.
My torso was draped across his as I dropped a kiss on his stubbly chin. His one word stirred the surface of my skin, his sweet, earthy scent bleeding into me and wending its way straight to my heart. “It’s nice being like this again,” I murmured. “Alura wasn’t nearly as fun to cuddle with.”
“That’s so sad.” His mouth curved up and his warm hands snaked up my spine and sent a shiver through me. “’Cause Renzo was great. We spooned all night.”
I snickered, not wanting that image in my head. “You slept alone on the sofa, huh?”
He nodded and rolled us over so we faced each other on our sides. The need to kiss him consumed me and I laid my hands at the back of his head, ready to pull his mouth to mine.
My cell vibrated, throwing me out of the moment. I leaned into the bedside table for my phone and my tank top scooted up. Zack inched it up a little more and his lips trailed across my ribs, sending warmth through my middle.
I liked where this was going. As much as I wanted to see my parents, I could’ve used more time reconnecting with Zack. In bed. “My mom says they’re a half hour away.”
Zack sprung off the bed. “You can’t have bed hair when your dad gets here. He’ll want to kill me.”
I bit my lip to keep it from twitching. “They know we’re not doing anything.”
“Dads worry anyway. C’mon.” He grabbed the shirt he’d stripped off last night and flicked me with it. “Get in the shower.”
Zack tried to swat me with his shirt again and I snatched it, yanking it and pulling him to me. I shoved him back to the bed and we tumbled. He sighed as his palm covered my cheek. “We’ll work something out, okay? If we end up separating, we’ll keep in touch and things will work out later.”
Butterflies danced in my stomach and warmth sheathed my skin. “I hope so.”
† † †
With Zack by my side, I peered out our bedroom window as a white sedan rolled up the wide, seemingly endless driveway. Had to be my parents. I dashed out into the hallway, down the several flights of stairs, and then I flew through the front door.
By the time I got to the car, my mom was getting out. She looked exactly the same. Her long, nearly black hair was a shade darker than mine, and I had to bend to hug her.
I squeezed her so tight a human would’ve been crushed. “Mom!”
“Sweetheart, I can’t tell you how happy I am to see you.” She stroked my hair then her hand froze. She leaned back to get an eyeful of me and beamed. “You cut your hair. I love it.”
“Thanks.” I craned my neck to get a good view of my dad, then released my mom and rounded the hood. My dad hadn’t changed a bit—much taller than the average male, his hair still golden blond. And not a wrinkle in sight. I jumped into his arms. “Missed you so much.”
I’d always assumed they were in their late thirties and never questioned how truly young they both looked. I hadn’t seen them since learning they were shape-shifters and that I wasn’t adopted. I could’ve smacked my forehead for not realizing ages ago there was something off about them.
Dad hefted me up off the ground and twirled us in a circle. “We won’t have to miss each other for a long while. Not if we’re on the road together.”
Oh, crap. Which reminded me that I’d be leaving Zack. My parents expected me to drive away, not knowing when I’d see him again. Months from now? Years? Since less than an hour ago when he’d talked about our future, being without him even one day was getting harder and harder to imagine.
Or I could let my parents go. A weight lifted off my chest at the thought of keeping Zack and, just like that, my decision was made. But that meant... I slumped in my dad’s arms.
It was my parents I ached for now. We’d been apart so long and we’d kept so many secrets. I felt almost desperate to bare my soul and get it all out in the open.
“Everything okay?” he asked, trying to get a glimpse of my face that was buried in his shoulder.
I threw my head back and groaned. “I’m thinking of joining SWAAST.”
“What?”
I glanced over at my mom to see her eyes filled with alarm. “I want to stay with Zack. And helping his parents with the cause is the right thing to do.”
My mom clamped onto my shoulders and spun me around. “The hell you are! You’re a baby, barely matured into a shape-shifter.”
“You can’t even defend yourself,” my dad growled.
My mom glared at me. “The only thing you’ll accomplish is getting yourself killed.”
Nothing like being ganged up on. I raised my chin. “I’m stronger than you think and I’ve been training for days.”
“Days?” My dad’s nostrils flared and I guessed he was struggling to control himself. I wasn’t sure if I’d ever seen him that worked up since he was usually the calm one. “You’re crazy if you think a few days of training means you’re prepared for battle.”
My hands shot up, palms out. “All right, all right. I agree I’m not ready to win a war yet. But I’ll continue training with SWAAST.” I moaned. “Mom, Dad, these guys have been oppressing our species for centuries and they’ll keep doing it until someone stops them. And maybe it won’t be me, but at least I can help. I can’t do nothing. Isn’t that how you raised me?”
“We raised you to survive,” my mom said through clenched teeth. “Not take on a fight you have zero chance of winning.”
“But, Mom, I can’t just stand by.” I glanced from one to the other, trying to get some kind of
understanding from them. “You say I can’t win. Maybe that’s because there are too many shape-shifters who think like you. But what if every shifter out there banded together and did something about it? We’d have a chance then, wouldn’t we? And one day there might be enough of us together to win freedom for all shape-shifters. We won’t have to run anymore.”
My mom and dad stood speechless. Okay, that was better than making demands of me.
“Olivia, nice to see you again.” Cedric rushed to my mom and gathered her into a warm hug. I couldn’t be more grateful for the distraction. When he released her, he stretched out a hand for my dad. “Quentin, been a while.”
“Thanks for taking care of our girl,” my dad returned, though he seemed a little stiff.
“Actually, she took care of me. She’s very brave, your little one.” He motioned to the front door. “Come inside and we’ll catch you up.”
On the other side of the door waited Renzo, Favianne, Alura, and Zack. I’d taken a few steps toward them when I twisted around and noticed my mom and dad hadn’t moved. “Aren’t you guys coming inside?” They exchanged glances and I said, “These werewolves aren’t loyal to the king. You have nothing to worry about.”
They hesitated a moment before following me inside. Cedric made introductions in the foyer, my mom wearing a constant scowl.
My mom aimed a glare at Zack. “So you’re Zack.”
He nodded uncertainly, his hand fluttering at his side like he was ready to shake her hand but not sure if he should offer his own. “Nice to meet you both.”
She stuck close to my dad, straight faced with no sign of offering Zack a handshake. “I’m glad she had you to help her through her maturation as a shifter.”
“So you’re the reason my daughter is refusing to go with us?” My dad asked, his resentment apparent in his low, throaty voice.
Why were my parents being so rude? I’d have to interrogate them, but right now, I didn’t want to bring attention to it. Maybe they’d chill once they saw for themselves that the werewolves posed no threat.