I shake my head. ‘No, definitely not. I paused the TV and I had the monitor in my hand. The voices came from the monitor. I could see the monitor’s lights flashing while they spoke.’
Dom nods thoughtfully. ‘What did the police say?’
‘They’re going round to all the neighbours, asking if anyone has a baby staying with them.’
‘Good idea.’
‘What if those people are still out there?’ As I voice my concerns, new worries begin to seep into my mind. ‘You hear about these things, don’t you? Baby-smuggling rings where they take young children and sell them to rich couples abroad. It happens.’
‘Kirstie, we live in Wimborne. It’s not exactly rife with international crime. I’m pretty sure there aren’t any baby-smuggling rings in Dorset.’ A sympathetic smile creeps onto his lips, but there’s absolutely no part of this that is amusing to me.
‘How do you know?’ I reply. ‘Maybe it would be the perfect place – a sleepy little town in England where no one suspects that anything bad could happen.’
‘Let’s wait and see what the police say.’ He puts an arm around me and kisses the side of my head. ‘I know what happened must’ve been scary, but try not to worry.’
I murmur agreement, but my brain is still racing with all the awful possibilities. I shudder at the thought of those whispered voices and what they were discussing. That they could have chosen my house and my baby. I’m going to have to be more careful. I’m going to have to make the house more secure. The idea of someone taking Daisy – it doesn’t bear thinking about. My stomach gives a sudden lurch, and I have the sensation that something has irrevocably shifted.
That nothing in our lives will ever be quite the same again.
Three
Twenty minutes later, I’m sitting on the sofa once more, having just fed Daisy. Normally it’s a quiet moment, a time for us to bond, but this evening I’m on autopilot while my mind jumps back and forth from I need to keep my baby safe to It’ll be okay, don’t panic. Dominic strolls back into the lounge dressed in clean shorts and a T-shirt, his hair damp from the shower. I give a start as the doorbell rings.
‘I’ll get it,’ Dominic says.
‘It’s probably the police,’ I call after him, retying the strap of my dress and running a hand over my dark curls, making sure I look half-presentable. I glance out of the window, get to my feet and place Daisy over my shoulder, patting her back and waiting for her to burp, hoping she doesn’t throw up on me – I forgot to put a cloth over my shoulder.
I hear my husband introduce himself. Seconds later he comes back into the lounge accompanied by the two officers. ‘Can I make you a tea or coffee?’ Dominic asks them. ‘Or something cold?’
‘No thanks,’ the taller one says, wiping a sheen of sweat from his forehead with his fingertips. ‘Just checking – you weren’t in the house when your wife heard the voices in the monitor?’
‘No, I was out for a run,’ Dominic replies, ‘but she filled me in on what happened.’
‘Good. Well, we spoke to all your neighbours, and none of them have a baby in their house. It’s just you with a little one. And there aren’t any other residential roads close by. You’re surrounded by fields.’
‘Could the monitor have picked up a signal from further away?’ I ask.
‘It’s doubtful,’ he replies, ‘but we’ll look into it.’
‘Because someone, somewhere, has taken a baby – or at least they’ve tried to.’
‘If there’s an abduction or attempted abduction, I’m sure the parents will get in touch with us.’
‘But what if they don’t know yet?’ I say, the horror of the situation dawning on me. ‘What if they’re sitting in their lounge watching TV thinking their baby is fast asleep upstairs, but, in reality, it’s already been taken by someone? They might not check on their child for hours.’ I glance out of the window once more, putting my fingers to the glass, half-expecting to see someone making off down the road with a child.
‘Kirstie,’ Dom says gently. ‘They’ve spoken to all our neighbours. No one has a baby. I’m sure the monitor wouldn’t pick up a signal from miles away. Could it have been someone else’s TV programme you heard through the monitor?’
‘I don’t think so. No. It sounded like Daisy’s cry and then someone clearly saying they wanted to take the baby. It sounded real. Not like something on TV.’
‘Look,’ the taller officer says with a sympathetic expression. ‘Whatever you heard, it gave you a shock, understandably. But if anyone has abducted a child, we’ll find out about it, and we’ll act on it, okay? And, in the meantime, if you hear or see anything else that worries you, then please give us a call.’
‘Thanks, Officer.’ Dominic shakes his hand and the policemen turn to leave.
Is that it? I think. Is that all they’re going to do? I could’ve done that myself. I could’ve walked around and asked the neighbours if they had any babies staying with them. Maybe they think I’m a crackpot. I know I probably look dishevelled and out of it, but I’m the mother of a six-month-old baby, for goodness sake. I turn to look at myself in the mirror above the mantelpiece. My usually glossy curls are both greasy and frizzy, and my face is pale as the moon. I bend my head to sniff my shoulder – a waft of baby milk, sweat and recent fear makes me wrinkle my nose.
Dominic sees the officers out and comes back in, his arms open wide. I step into them, still cradling Daisy. I haven’t put her down since I heard the voices. Dominic smells of citrus shower gel. Of home. I feel safe in his arms. He kisses the top of my head.
‘How about I make my Thai curry tonight?’ he says. ‘I’ll put Daisy back to bed first. You go and have a shower, then sit down and put your feet up.’
‘Thai curry sounds good,’ I say, not really feeling at all hungry. ‘But I’d rather keep Daisy down here with us after what’s happened.’
Dominic steps back and stares at me. ‘You’re really shaken up, Kirst. You’re white as a ghost.’
‘I thought they’d taken her,’ I say. ‘It’s just a shock, that’s all. I’ll be okay in a minute.’
‘Why don’t I bring Daisy’s old Moses basket downstairs?’ he suggests. ‘It’s in the spare room, isn’t it? She can stay down here with us this evening.’
‘Will she still fit in it?’ I ask hopefully.
‘She’ll be fine.’
‘Okay.’ My shoulders relax a little. As long as we keep her with us, I’ll feel better. Safer.
Half an hour later, I’m sitting at the kitchen table sipping a glass of water and Daisy is fast asleep in her old basket – her mop of dark hair pressing against the end. She barely fits, but she’ll be fine in there for now. Dominic is standing at the hob, cooking away, dance tunes blaring out of the speakers. You’d think the noise would wake Daisy, but she’s already used to his awful taste in music. Dom rarely cooks, and when he does it’s always a Thai curry or spaghetti Bolognese, both of which he makes exceptionally well. The bifold doors are open and I’m itching to close them tight and turn the lock, but it’s too hot, especially while Dom’s cooking. We would roast. I’ll close the doors before we eat.
‘I’m going to check everything in the house is locked up,’ I say, getting to my feet. ‘Keep an eye on her, won’t you? Don’t leave her alone.’
‘I’m here. She’ll be fine. There’s no one out there.’
But I’m not convinced. ‘I won’t be long.’ Quickly, I move around the house, closing all the windows in each and every room, even the smaller windows that only a cat could fit through. I don’t want to take any chances. I won’t think about how warm the rooms will get without fresh air circulating. I can put up with the heat if it means my little girl will be safe. Lastly, I check the front door, turn the mortice lock and slide the chain across with shaking fingers.
I can’t remember the last time I felt fear like this. Actual spine-tingling fear. Maybe never. No, not never. There was one time when I was about thirteen or fourteen, walking home
from school one day. I was alone on a quiet suburban street and it was winter, a dark afternoon with no one else around. I heard footsteps behind me, getting closer. I was too scared to turn around, somehow convinced it was a man about to attack me, my mind conjuring up all these unthinkable scenarios. I had worked myself up into such a state of clammy terror that I couldn’t think straight. I quickened my pace but didn’t want to run in case he chased after me, confirming my fears. Instead, I crossed over the road and slowed my pace. It was only when I saw it was actually a woman of my mother’s age that I felt a flood of foolish relief, despite my heart still battering my ribcage.
But that was a fear of my own creation. Not like this. Nothing like this.
I walk back into the kitchen, where Dom is nodding his head in time to the beat of the music from his iPod speakers while draining the water from a pan of rice. I check on Daisy, who’s still asleep, and I drink in the sight of her, grateful that she’s here. I could stare at her perfect face all night, but eventually I pull my gaze away, sit at the table and reach for my phone. I tap in a search for baby monitors picking up other signals. A whole screed of results appears – mainly old forum posts from 2010 to 2013. It seems it was quite a common occurrence with older monitors.
‘Dom.’
‘Everything okay?’ He lowers the volume on the speakers and turns to me, one eyebrow raised.
‘It says here that the older-style monitors can pick up other monitors’ signals.’ I turn my phone screen towards him, but he doesn’t look at it.
‘You’re gonna drive yourself mad worrying about it,’ Dom says. ‘I know you heard something that creeped you out, but there could be a simple explanation.’
‘Like what?’ I fold my arms across my chest, starting to feel irritated by his lack of concern.
‘Don’t look like that,’ he says. ‘I’m not saying you didn’t hear it. I’m just saying there could be an innocent explanation. I’m trying to reassure you.’
‘Like what?’ I repeat. ‘What could be the innocent explanation?’
‘Like… you heard someone else’s TV programme. Or you misheard the actual words.’
‘I know what I heard.’
‘Okay, say you did hear what you heard. It was someone else’s house. It wasn’t here. No one was trying to take Daisy.’
‘That doesn’t make it okay.’
‘No, I know. I know. Sorry. Maybe they were saying it innocently, like let’s take the baby to mum’s house, or let’s take the baby for a walk.’
‘It wasn’t anything like that. It was scary.’
‘What do you want to do about it?’ Dom asks, setting his wooden spoon down on the worktop.
‘I don’t know. Be on our guard I suppose. Keep a look out. Don’t let Daisy out of our sight.’
‘Okay. We can do that.’
I know I sound paranoid, but he wasn’t the one who heard those voices. If he had, I’m sure he would be just as frightened. That voice creeped me out. I keep hearing it in my mind over and over. Quick, let’s just take the baby now and go. Who was it? And what did they do?
Four
I lie on my side, gazing down at Daisy in her basket. It’s too dark to make out her features, but I can see her shape, and I know she’s asleep by the sound of her regular breathing. Dom wasn’t exactly thrilled at having her back in our bedroom. Don’t get me wrong, he loves our daughter, he just has a hard time sleeping with her in the same room. But one look at my expression told him he would have to accept it. At least for tonight. Anyway, I’ve had to make my own compromises, as Dom refused to shut the bedroom windows. I suppose he’s right – the heat would be unbearable otherwise.
So now, here I am, wide awake at 2 a.m., alert to every sound outside. Every breath of wind and distant dog bark makes me startle, setting my heart racing. I never usually mind the windows being open, but that was before. The rational part of my brain is telling me that if anyone were to break into our house and come into our bedroom, we would wake up, but the irrational part won’t allow me to sleep. I’m also paranoid that I’ve missed a window. Did I lock the one in the downstairs loo? I think I did, but I can’t be certain. I’m going to have to check. Maybe that’s what’s stopping me falling asleep. I’m sure once I’ve double checked the locks again, I’ll be able to relax.
I slide out of bed carefully, desperate not to wake Daisy or Dominic. As I tiptoe around Daisy towards the door, Dom murmurs, ‘Kirstie? What’re you doing?’
‘Loo,’ I reply.
‘Okay.’ He huffs and turns over.
I can feel his annoyance. I picture him lying there, eyes wide open, cursing me for waking him up. But I can’t stop thinking about the downstairs window. I need to go and check it.
Once I get there, I discover, of course, that it’s locked, as are all the other downstairs doors and windows. But at least I feel a little less on edge now I know for sure that the house is secure. I creep back upstairs and decide I may as well check Daisy’s room, the spare room and the bathroom. Once that’s done, I slip back into bed to lie beside my wide-awake husband, worrying about him on top of everything else.
* * *
Sunlight blazes through the bedroom windows as I sit up in bed, giving Daisy her morning feed. I feel out of sorts. Like part of me is still asleep. Like I’m floating above reality. Anxious – as though I’m about to take a hard exam or topple off a cliff.
Dominic comes into the bedroom. He’s already dressed in his suit and tie and he leans down to kiss me, the scent of his aftershave giving me a momentary feeling of normality. Everything is as it should be. Why, then, does it all feel so different?
‘Sorry I woke you last night,’ I say, bracing myself for him to be grumpy.
‘You didn’t wake me,’ he says, casting his eyes around the room, looking for something.
‘Yeah, when I got up to go to the bathroom, you asked me what I was doing.’
‘Oh, yeah, I vaguely remember something.’
‘I thought I’d ruined your night’s sleep.’
‘No. I slept fine. Have you seen my phone?’
Great. I tormented myself with guilt all night over nothing. ‘It’s on the dresser.’ I point to it.
‘Thanks. You’re out with Mel tonight, aren’t you?’ he says. ‘What time do you need me home?’
My stomach drops. I’d forgotten I was supposed to be going out for a meal with my old school friends this evening – my first night out since Daisy was born. I’ve been looking forward to it for ages, but I’m so, so tired and the thought of going out fills me with unease. How can I leave Daisy when there are possible child abductors in the area? I know Dominic will be with her, but he won’t be as careful as me. He’ll leave windows open, he might not be listening out for intruders.
‘The taxi’s supposed to be coming at seven,’ I say. ‘But actually, I don’t think I’m going to go. After what happened yesterday—’
‘What are you talking about?’ Dominic says, sitting on the end of the bed. ‘Of course you’re going to go. It’ll do you good to get out of the house for an evening. You deserve a night out with everyone. Time away from our little munchkin. You’ll love it. Anyway, I’ve got some serious father–daughter bonding time planned for tonight. We’re going to watch Top Gear.’
I roll my eyes and manage a half-smile. ‘I don’t know, Dom.’
‘Kirstie, come on. You love going out with your friends.’
‘Yeah, but I’m just so tired.’
‘So try and put Daisy down for an hour or two and get some more sleep. Look, I’d better go. I’ve got a meeting first thing. I’ll try and be back by six – give you an hour to get ready in peace.’
‘Okay,’ I say. ‘Thank you. You’re amazing.’
‘I know,’ he quips. And then he turns serious. ‘Don’t worry, Kirst. You’ll feel better after another little sleep. I promise.’
Suddenly, the thought of Dominic leaving for work sends a tidal wave of panic through my system. ‘I wish you could
stay home with us today.’
‘Nothing I’d like more, but someone’s got to whip those sales teams into shape. Why don’t you have that extra sleep then go and see your mum for an hour or two? Change of scenery. Look, I really do have to go. See you later, Kirst. Bye, Dais.’ He gives us both a kiss and a wave before leaving. I listen to the thud of his feet on the stairs, to the jingle of his keys, and finally the slam of the front door. The house falls silent.
Daisy reaches her hand up to my face, her eyes wide, fingers grabbing at my cheek. I force out a smile, but my guts are churning, my heart racing. This is crazy. I need to snap out of it.
One hour later, I’m showered and dressed and sitting on the sofa sipping tea. Daisy is lying on her mat under her play mobile, batting the hanging toys with her hands and toes. Yet unease still clings to me. This is ridiculous. I’ve always been comfortable in my own skin. My home is my sanctuary. The place I can relax and feel content. Yesterday’s ‘incident’ is the first time I’ve felt unsettled in my own house. Things like that just aren’t supposed to happen in places like this.
Wimborne Minster is a pretty market town not too far from the coast and surrounded by countryside. Everyone knows everyone and there’s hardly any crime here. Even the weather is mild and sunny most days. I’ve lived in Wimborne all my life. So has Dominic. So have most of my friends and neighbours. It even topped one of those polls for the best place to live in Britain. One of the happiest places. And it is. It is a happy place. I’m happy. I am. Or at least I was. But now my happiness has been contaminated. I don’t feel quite the same as I did this time yesterday morning. That easy contentment has curdled like cream in the sunshine. How can things change this quickly?
Am I overreacting? Hearing those voices yesterday has tipped everything off balance. Just thinking about them makes my palms sweat. But did anything actually happen? No one else seems to think so. Not Dom. Not the police. Not even my neighbours. It was only me who heard those voices. And no one actually broke into our house. No one took Daisy, or even attempted to take her. But what if they did take that other child? What if they harmed the parents? Left them for dead? I hate not knowing what happened. What if they decide to come back for Daisy?