~*~
I was standing in the parking lot of the State of Minnesota High School. I knew exactly where we were. I desperately hoped that this was all I was going to see, but something inside me told me it wasn’t. Sitting silently on a bench, a few feet from me, was the younger me. At 15 years of age and her nature to make enemies out of everyone she talked too, she sat alone. But there was one who she didn’t, and he was coming towards her. A young man approached, I passively looked on as my younger self brushed all her hair around her neck to one side. He had given her a compliment saying he loved my hair that way not to many days before this. It stuck. She gave a quaint girly smile towards him. There was something about him that changed her personality, but she couldn’t figure out what! All she knew is her heart raced each time she saw him, and she felt safe, happy and satisfied when she was around him.
This young man was Nathan, and the young, vulnerable girl – me – was madly in love with him. Sitting down, Nathan smiled at the her, and she got a sheepish grin back.
“So we’re graduating...”
“Yea.” The younger me said with a slight frown.
“I will miss seeing you every day.”
I slipped a slight smirk, my younger self was thinking the exact same thing, but was at a loss for words to admit it. So she just nodded back.
“I was thinking...” Nathan continued. “I was wondering if you’d want to go out and catch a bite to eat with me Friday?”
“Like... a date?” She asked.
Nathan bit his tongue and nodded.
“A-alright! Sure!”
With a large grin and nod, Nathan stood up. “Excellent! Perfect. I have to go here. Work, you know.”
She nodded back.
“Meet me at my house at six?”
“A surprise dinner?”
Nathan nodded. “Perfect.”
What he did next caught her off guard. Nathan leaned forward and put his lips to her cheek, giving her a quick kiss before he left.
Watching him go away, I could feel my heart warm. The connection between me and my past self. To feel that feeling of being loved, it wasn’t something I felt in a long time, and to be honest was something I missed. This was the first in a long string of events that would lead to so much pain.
My eyes started to blur as I watched Nathan walk away. Everything just started to melt together and fuze colors. It was like somebody spilled fifty different colors all over a perfectly painted canvas. Rubbing my eyes, I tried to clear my foggy vision. When I reopened them, I was in the front room of my house.
I just saw where it started, and now I was at about to see the end.
Something started to happen, something that hadn’t happened before. A blur of color started to spread from my direction to my younger self. Looking down, my hands were slowly dispersing into a tan mist and finding it’s way into my younger self’s head. Everything went black for a few seconds before it reappeared. My view had changed, I was going to see it and feel it through first person, just like it was unfolding for the first time.
Sitting on the sofa, I had my knees pulled up close to me. My head was buried in my hands as I wailed. The images of the past were flooding back. The explosions, my father’s words, everything was haunting me.
I looked up to see Resh, even though it was only about a year ago he still looked younger in my eyes, and it surprised me. He came in and set a gentle hand on my shoulder, but I shrugged it off. Sighing and walked off, He walked into the other room as the doorbell rang. It was the last thing I wanted, company.
Walking over to the door she opened it up with a sassy remark. “What do you want- Oh…” My eyes bulged. “Sorry Nathan. I’m just not in a good mood…”
Nathan stepped through the door, wiping a tear from my eye as he did so.
I smiled and let him come in and he smiled back in his usual gentle way. Completely out of habit, I adjusted my hair around my neck like I always did whenever I saw him.
Slowly walking over and plopping back down on the couch again, it took a few moments for Nathan to join me. He gently caressed my hair, he knew exactly what I was going through. I’d told him before.
Silence was prevented by only the sound of the fire, crackling in the fireplace. It’s dim, warm rays of comfort projected throughout the room.
I could hear Resh come around from the kitchen and disappear into his bedroom. Something caught Nathan’s attention when he did so.
“Does anyone else know who your brother really is?” Nathan inquired.
“Only you and me.” I replied, gently shaking my head, I took a deep breath and wiped away a few tears, regaining my posture a bit.
Nathan nodded back to me, he checked over his shoulder and looked back at me. “Natalia?”
“Yes Nathan?” I replied.
“I don’t think it’s good for you to for have Resh around you. I don’t think he’s worth the risk.”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. “W-what?” I stuttered.
“There are people Natalia who... Who would go at any length to get their hands on him. And having him so close to you puts you in danger.”
“You’ve got to be kidding.”
“What?” Nathan said, confused.
“That’s exactly why I want to be around him. I need to protect him!”
“It’s not worth it Natalia!” Nathan exclaimed.
“He’s my brother Nathan! What am I supposed to do?”
“He’s not your brother! He’s an... Alien who you found!” The conversation had quickly turned into a shouting fest.
“I don’t care what you’re saying, Resh doesn’t get in the way of our relationship. He keeps to himself and I’ve handled everything fine so far.” I explained.
“Yea? Well what if he is? Okay? What if it makes me uncomfortable?”
“Well, what would you have me do?”
“Get rid of him.”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. “What? No! Never! Let him roam on his own, He isn’t back to full health!”
“It’s me or him Natalia.” Nathan asserted. He was giving me the look. The look he always gave me when he really really meant something.
I was torn. I loved Nathan, and loved Resh. I loved them in different ways. Resh saved my life, and I owe him.
“What’s going on?” A voice said off to the side of us, Resh had come out. I sighed and looked away. This wasn’t... couldn’t be happening.
“Choose Natalia.” Nathan said. “Choose.”
I didn’t want to choose. I didn’t want to answer, so that’s exactly what I did. And not answering is worse than picking either.
“You leave me no choice.” Nathan said,
“What?”
“Resh doesn’t belong, he’s going to contaminate our way of life. Not just you and me but all of humanity. Humans aren’t ready to have their kind walk among us...” This was a side I’d never seen in Nathan before. He walked over to Resh, grabbed him by the neck and pinned him to the wall.
“Nathan! Stop!” I yelled. Running up to him, I grabbed his arm with a tight grip. “Nathan!” This is when it happened, I was sent tumbling to the ground. Nathan hit me. I was disoriented and dazed. Intense throbbing filled my head. With my heart beating so hard, I thought it was going to pop. Did that really just happen?
Able to make out Nathan shoving Resh into the bedroom, I ran over to the door as I collected my bearings. Trying the handle,it didn’t budge. Locked.
“You’re finally getting what you deserve.” I heard from inside.
I tried to kick the door.
“Don’t get in my way Natalia! This has to happen.”
Pulling out my handgun to blow off the handle, it was empty. I always kept it loaded, Nathan must have unloaded it.
infuriated, I ran to my closet and grabbed a rifle out of it. Heading back to the door, I shot a bullet and it blew out the lock. I kicked the door opened, looking to aim at Nathan. Instead, my hand met the blunt of a baseba
ll bat. Sending me reeling to the ground as I gripped my hand, Nathan continued to hit me again in the side. “Stay. Down.”
What was going on? I felt so confused. Why is he doing this?
I couldn’t move my hand, it probably was broken. Desperately, I reached for my gun only to have Nathan kick it away.
Watching as Nathan went on to bind Resh’s hands, feet and wings together. “When will you ever learn…when will you give up? You let your feelings cloud your judgment.” He said.
He was right, I wasn’t sure how, but all I could tell as I was weak and my emotions were at fault.
“I won’t let you take him…” I groaned.
“Really...? You know as well as I do that when I have the upper hand I never lose.”
“I. Choose. Resh.” I yelled through bared teeth.
“Ha! Too late for that... Shoulda kept your mouth shut now.” He said, proceeding to hit me again with the bat once again. Screaming in agony, it was times like now I wished I lived in an area where someone could hear me scream. Someone to help. I was alone.
I barely caught glimpse of Resh’s gaze. Something about it gave me strength. Something about it gave me the determination and courage to make a move. “Nathan?”
“What!?” Nathan snapped back.
“Tell the Devil I said hello next time you go home for Christmas.”
That infuriated him. He came at me bringing the bat down. Rolling to dodge it, I swept Nathan's legs from out with under him. I didn’t feel any of the pain I expected from my beaten and bruised back.
In one movement I grabbed the bat, stood up and brought it down, smashing in Nathan’s skull... Just like that, it was over.
Everything sunk in all at once. Tears produced so fast that I couldn’t contain them. I collapsed to the ground with my eyes so full of tears, I couldn’t see anything but a blur.
Only one thought flew through my brain.
I will never love again…