Chapter Twenty-One
“I WISH YOU’D snap out of it,” Beth grumbled. “I came home for some fun, not to look at your sour face. Are you coming out tonight, or what? Everyone’s been asking.”
“Why do you need me there?”
“Well, because your good mood is both obvious and contagious, and I was hoping it would rub off on us…not. Because I want the old Soph back, that’s why—and you promised.”
“I know, but—”
“Look, we’ve been home for two days now. You need to stop moping, forget Seb for a while, accept the fact that life can be shit and you can’t control it, and have some fun.”
“Okay, okay, I give up. I’ll come.”
“That’s my girl.”
I had to admit, it felt good to be among my peers again. Despots was a hive of teenage festivity, and I wasn’t given the chance to wallow. My glass was regularly filled, and Beth saw to it that my imaginary dance card was just as copious.
I submerged myself in the attention of my admirers, drowning in my own wantonness and not caring that I was leading them on. I craved their advances with the sole purpose of rejecting them. It made me feel better to be wanted. But I went home alone in the early hours and slept solidly for the first time in weeks.
The beast was coming. Claws scraped along the cave floor: faster, closer. I couldn’t move. My legs were pillars of stone, rooted to the spot, keeping me prisoner, holding me for death. He was here. The blackness descended, and Tokala’s image materialised to chastise me.
‘Evil and death seep through the darkness. Recklessness is not the trait of a goddess. It is not your role to be selfish. Do not treat your gifts lightly.’
I sat up abruptly. Recollections of howls in the night haunted my first waking minutes. Was it my destiny to be always plagued by nightmares?
I had woken only as the sun was going to sleep, and I shivered in the chill of the twilight hours. A familiar rumble shook the floor as I forced my eyes to remain open.
“Ah, Sleeping Beauty awakens at last,” Beth said as I mooched through to the kitchen.
“It’s a bit hard to sleep when the floor’s shaking. I wonder who’s taking up residence?” I pondered, searching the overhead cupboard for painkillers.
“The hearse was going out, not coming in. I saw it through the window. And that reminds me. It was all over the news earlier. A couple were attacked in their car up on Lyall Ridge last night. The girl managed to escape and was picked up by a passing motorist, but then she died of shock in Carleigh General this morning before she could be fully questioned. They found pieces of the boy’s body scattered around the area. On all the talk shows, speculation is rife about big cats and mad axe men. You don’t think one of the guys did it, do you?”
“Quite frankly, I don’t care,” I replied. Was someone bashing a hammer around inside my skull?
“Oh, really? How about we take a drive up there tonight and watch the full moon come up? Oh, no, sorry, that was last night! Don’t tell me that that snippet of information doesn’t make you just a tad curious, and maybe just a little nervous, because it does me. Who’s to say that whatever did it won’t take a trip into town tonight, maybe pay us a visit?”
“It might hurt less than my head.”
“You’ve only got yourself to blame for that one, kiddo.”
Twenty-four hours later, I emerged from the shower and entered a full living room. Everyone had gathered at our place for pre-party drinks, and they were sitting around excitedly anticipating the evening’s festivities.
“Unless I missed something and there were bathrobes on the catwalk this season, I’m guessing someone’s not ready for the party yet,” Carmen said, taking in my apparel.
“Sorry. I wasn’t informed I had to dress to schedule,” I replied shortly. “Don’t let me keep you. Please. Feel free to go on ahead.”
“There’s no need to take your frustrations out on the rest of us, Soph,” Beth said. “It’s New Year’s Eve, and I’m ordering you to snap out of it. Now, go get dressed. We’ll see you there.”
A short while later, perched on the edge of the mattress wearing only my underwear, I applied my party face, but in the absence of any other stimulus, my resolve wavered and I lapsed into thinking about Sebastian. Despite my harsh exterior, my heart missed him, and I couldn’t help wondering if he was okay.
A faint creak intruded into my thoughts. Was that the door? Had somebody returned to make sure I couldn’t back out?
Connor’s reflection appeared in my compact mirror, and he saluted me.
“What are you doing here, Con?” I wasn’t feeling up to facing one of Connor’s moods.
“To tell you Seb’s fine, but he hasn’t found Jimmy yet. He followed the trail to Russia. Thought you might wanna know.”
“Well, I don’t,” I lied before adding hesitantly, “unless he had a message for me.”
Connor came to sit on the bed and took my hand. “The news didn’t come directly, only from contacts, sightings, you know. I’m sorry.”
“Then I’m even less interested. If he can’t be bothered to call…”
I tried in vain to snatch my hand from his, but he strengthened his grip and leaned in, wrapping his other arm over my lap to prevent me from rising.
“Sophie. They didn’t expect it to take so long, but shit happens. The search has taken them through some pretty dangerous stuff. They’re having to trail through places of total depravity, sections of our society usually given a wide berth. Our family would be considered fresh meat and fair game,” he said. “I know Seb would call if he could, but he’s thinking of your safety. He wouldn’t want any risk of a link to you if they were captured, and he knows you’re safe with me.”
Connor glanced down at my chest and moved his face closer to mine until our noses were almost touching. My heart hammered and my limbs grew heavy as my body betrayed my heart.
“Safe?” I stammered, falling back onto the sheets.
“I’ll look after you,” he said gently.
He bent over me; his lean, muscular body pressed against mine and I could feel his breath on my lips. I licked them involuntarily.
I didn’t resist as his mouth descended onto mine. His kiss was urgent, forcing my lips apart with his tongue. I returned it instinctively. He let go of my hand so that his was free to explore my curves with great satisfaction. My body responded, and I almost forgot who I was with. Sebastian had awakened a side of me that hadn’t previously existed, and I was now struggling to deny its needs. Connor’s touch excited me and made me want more, despite myself.
He moaned as his thumb crept under the edge of my bra.
I pushed him away. “Stop,” I panted. “We can’t.”
“Why not? What’s up?”
“This. This is up. I can’t do it.” I stood up, yanked my dress from its hanger, and pulled it over my head.
“You can’t deny you feel something. Is it that wrong to just accept it and enjoy it?”
“Yes, Con, it is,” I said, fastening the buckles on my new gold sandals. “And you’re wrong.” I stood up and smoothed down my dress. “My feelings are for Seb, and you’re like a brother to him, so that’s all you can be to me. Can we please forget what just happened?”
I reapplied my lipstick and twisted my hair up quickly, securing it with a sparkly clip. Connor watched intently.
“Seb would understand,” he said. “That’s how it is with us. But if you don’t want me, that’s different. Just tell me.” He snagged my wrist. “Sophie, tell me you don’t feel anything for me.”
I wanted to say it, but the words wouldn’t come.
“Go on,” he pressed. “Say it if you can. Because if that’s the case, I’ll walk out that door right now and not bother you again.”
My heart ached. What could I say? I couldn’t be with him, but I didn’t want to lose his friendship, either.
I sighed. “I’m going to join the party.”
A deflated look saddened his f
ace. “I’ll walk you over.”
The gang wasn’t hard to miss. Their rowdiness reverberated across the room. I waved at them and turned to Connor, but he’d vanished. Typical Lovell man.
“I heard you’re back on the market,” Jack said.
I shot him a ‘shut up’ look and sat down. “You heard wrong.”
“So, have I got a chance or not?” he persisted.
“Not.”
“Aww, don’t be like that. You know we’d be good together. Beth, help me out here.”
She nodded. “Sure. Which way did you come in?”
Half an hour before midnight, I was still sober, and if I was going to allow one of the misfits who’d been trying it on all evening to get my New Year’s kiss, I was going to need more fuel. I glanced around the table. “Anyone need a top-up? I’m buying.”
“Cheers, Soph. Mine’s a tequila,” Carmen said, holding out her empty glass.
“A wine spritzer would be great, thanks,” Marie added.
Jack didn’t look up from the poor girl whose mouth he was welded to, but he pushed the dregs of his pint in my direction.
Still pondering over quite how Jack had ended up in our circle of friends, I glanced over at the dance floor, where the heads of Beth, Justin, and his other half were just about discernible, bobbing around in a sea of bodies and arms. I managed to catch their eyes, getting a nod and thumbs-up when I pointed to an empty glass.
Upstairs, the atmosphere was slightly less frantic.
Paired-off couples were lounging amidst scattered beanbags, and those still searching for company draped over the railings in a futile attempt to attract attention from someone, anyone, on the dance floor below. Over at the bar, I squeezed through the loiterers to the counter and perched upon a rare free stool. I didn’t have to wait too long before the barman spotted me.
“Hey, Martin,” I shouted as he strolled over. “Can I have a quick shot before I pass on the shipping order, please?” Martin passed me a miniature glass, and I threw the fiery liquid down my throat, feeling its tingling heat as it trickled down towards my stomach. “Another, please.”
Martin studied me intently as he poured the top-up. “It won’t work, you know.”
“Sorry?”
“Drowning your sorrows. The answer never lies at the bottom of a glass.”
“Barman or part-time psychologist?” I asked.
The corner of his mouth curved into a crooked smile. “Just a little friendly advice. Now, what was that order?”
The small tray in front of me filled up quickly, but I experienced a strange temperature drop as I handed over the payment. I rubbed at the goosebumps on my arms.
“Beautiful hair. You must be Sophie.” The smooth voice came from behind me.
I spun the stool around and found myself face-to-face with an extremely handsome man. Deep brown eyes gazed enticingly into mine from his immaculately chiselled face, and my chill was forgotten.
“Tales of your beauty are grossly underestimated,” he said.
I stared like an idiot. His brilliantly white teeth glowed under the ultraviolet lights, and he gently pushed a lock of wavy brown almost-shoulder-length hair behind his ear. Before I spoke, I had a feeling that I shouldn’t, but my mouth took on a will of its own.
“And you are?”
“Under your spell.”
“Cheesy.”
“My apologies. Let me give you a hand with those.”
He reached over to take the tray, and a waft of expensive aftershave filled my nostrils. Problem solved. He would do nicely. I was already imagining the look on everyone’s faces when they saw me kissing this godlike creature.
“You didn’t answer my question,” I flirted.
“I prefer to keep an air of mystery.” He winked and parted a path for us.
“Okay, then, tell me how you know me,” I shouted, following him down the spiral staircase.
He paused at the bottom, adeptly balancing the tray with one hand whilst curling his other around my waist and steering me through the crowd. “Everyone who’s anyone knows about you, Sophie. You’ve made quite an impression on the men of this town, and yet you’ve spurned the advances of all but one. Although I hear on the grapevine that you may be available again.”
“I don’t know what could’ve given you that idea.” I gave him my best seductive smile as we reached the table, and he deposited the tray as the countdown started.
Ten, nine, eight…
My mystery man pulled me closer.
Seven, six, five…
He leaned in for his reward.
Four, three, two…
I licked my lips and closed my eyes in anticipation.
One. Happy New Year!
“Get your filthy hands off her!”
The expected kiss never came. I opened my eyes in time to see a flash of red pass over my admirer’s pupils. His eyes narrowed. He sniffed the air and his face became harder as he was wrenched from my grasp.
“I didn’t realise they were letting dogs in here now. I shall have to have a word with the management,” my admirer snarled, turning to greet his challenger. “Don’t they have a curfew at the pound?”
“This violates our agreement,” Connor spat.
“Really? In what way? I never mix business with someone else’s pleasure,” my admirer answered suavely.
“She’s not yours to please.”
“Yet.”
“Ever.”
“Well, we’ll see about that. I have quite a talent for mortal manipulation.”
Connor struggled to keep his anger under control.
“Hey. I’m not a competition,” I shouted, placing myself between them.
“Yeah, you are. You’re the trophy, and he’s not even a runner-up prize.” Connor spoke to me softly, then picked me up by the arms so he could deposit me out of range.
“Get off me, Connor. This has nothing to do with you.”
“Do you have a death wish, Sophie?” he asked.
“Huh?”
“Listen. I’ve tried, I really have, as much as it’s killing me. I’ve stood back and watched you enjoy the attention of other men in Sebastian’s absence, and tonight’s been no exception, but this time it’s different. You were about to kiss Tyron Reith.”
My mood dropped like a stone as the understanding of how easily I’d almost been taken in dawned on me. I stared at the man who wasn’t even a man, who was the mortal enemy of the man whom I professed to love, and felt hatred rise in my chest.
Tyron gave a low, throaty growl and faced up to Connor. The pure malice in his eyes removed my rose-tinted glasses, and I saw him for what he really was: a vile excuse for a man.
“You Lovell men are so sanctimonious.” Tyron said. “Don’t you realise there is nothing you possess that I cannot take away? I can tell when a woman wants me. I see the desire in her eyes.”
I squeezed between them. “Not in my eyes, you don’t.”
He studied my defiant face. “Too bad. We were getting on so well. I could have shown you the world. Of course…I could make you.” He contemplated. “Another time, maybe.” Tyron scowled at Connor. “I hope you realise whom you’re dealing with, Sophie, and what you’ve let yourself in for.”
“I do. I know everything about Sebastian.”
“Do you, now? And how’s that working out for you?”
“Great, thanks.”
“Really? So, where is he?”
“None of your business.”
He threw back his head with amusement. “Tell me. Do you dream about having his puppies? Or are you, as I suspect, more realistic and know that there’s no such thing as a happy ending?”
“That’s enough, man,” interrupted Connor.
“My, aren’t we the protective one? Two Lovells, one woman, a familiar story. You’ll have me thinking there’s something special about this girl.”
Tyron tilted his head slightly and looked directly into my eyes. I stared back confidently.
&n
bsp; “Well,” he deliberated. “You’re lucky I was looking for love tonight, not a fight, and I’m certain I won’t meet the same resistance from the next lady.”
I watched him blend back into the revellers. His sinister air trailed after him like a mist, enveloping everyone he passed, and I finally let go of my breath.
“Take me home please, Connor. I’m not in a partying mood anymore.”
It was dark, the kind of dark where the air seems thicker and suffocating. Anything could be lurking within inches of your face, waiting to pounce, waiting to devour, and you wouldn’t see it, but you could feel it, even when it wasn’t there. I was lying down. I reached out my hand and hit something solid. Another direction, again the barrier, over and over I thrashed out with both fists, hitting wood, clawing at the thin fabric covering. The air was getting thinner. I couldn’t breathe. I took a deep breath and screamed.