“How did they find out about Roxie’s things?”
They looked at Roxie then and back to Beckham. Nate shook his head. “No, I don’t know anything about that…”
“The story just came out about the two of you having a son,” Anthony jumped in.
“What? What are you talking about?” Beckham stuttered.
They all looked at Roxie and she turned completely white. Her mouth opened, but no words came out.
“What?” Beckham said, turning to Roxie.
She knew her eyes looked wild and she shook her head, but still couldn’t say anything. Tears fell, but she didn’t know if the tears were new or from all she’d just told him.
“I didn’t believe it was true, but now I’m not so sure,” Anthony said, staring at Roxie. “We came over here to do damage control with the press, but it looks like the joke might be on us. Is Leo Beckham’s son, Roxie?”
“Are you kidding me? Leo?” Beckham looked at everyone in the room, as if the facts were striking him like bullets, one right after the other.
Her stomach fell. She realized how this might look. She’d been distant and angry from the beginning, trying to do everything she could to keep him at a distance. Instead of using it to her advantage, she’d been shaken that the press had taken their pictures. Most dancers would have killed for any press, but she’d been the opposite of what he’d expected every time.
And he’d taken her virginity and forgotten about her. She had every reason to be bitter.
She knew it didn’t look good, but she couldn’t seem to stop shaking long enough to defend herself. This day—it was one too many slivers of insane.
Beckham walked within a foot of Roxie, all earlier softness gone. He stopped in front of her and put both hands on the wall, on either side of her face. He leaned down until they were about an inch apart.
“Who is Leo, Roxie?”
“My son,” she whispered.
“You have a—that little boy is yours?” He shook his head, but his eyes still didn’t seem focused. “Why didn’t you tell me you have a son? Is he mine?” His voice was quiet but harsh.
She shoved him away from her. She felt like she was looking at a stranger.
“No, he isn’t yours! What the hell are you thinking?”
“Let me see a picture of him.” He pointed to Nate and grabbed the paper out of his hands. A picture of Leo and Roxie was blown up. He sucked in a breath and sat down, staring at the picture.
When he looked up at Roxie, his eyes were tortured. “I know Leo. I met him. At the audition, I met him. I saw him again yesterday. Mavid,” he whispered. He shook his head. “He’s … a great kid.” He looked at the ceiling and stood back up, walking close to her. “Here’s what the hell I’m thinking: he looks like me! I’m thinking, how the hell did I not see it the very first time we met? I’m thinking, you’ve been hating me since you got here and I haven’t fully made sense of it. Until now…” He ran his hands through his curly hair and pointed at it and then the picture of Leo. “His hair is just like mine. His eyes are the same weird color as mine … the way we-” His voice broke and he hit the wall next to him.
Roxie jumped. She was terrified and ready to bolt. “I told you why I hated you. And Leo looks like his dad.”
“I didn’t realize how much you really hated me. Now I know. I just … I can’t even believe this. I want to get to know him.” He took a jagged breath. “Fuck, Roxie. How could you keep this from me?”
“He is not yours,” she hissed.
He studied her face. “Look at me and show me the truth. Right now I only see lies. You’ve been lying to me all along. Why didn’t you tell me you had a son?” He laughed, but it sounded hollow. “We slept together. Don’t you think you should have told me that little fact about yourself?”
Pain zigzagged through her heart and she staggered back against the wall. “I’ve just tried to do a good job. And yes, I’ve gotten carried away with you. I’ve … lost my mind … about you. Again.” A sob escaped and she clamped her hand over her mouth, the tears pooling into her hand. “I’ve missed Leo so much, I cry every time I talk to him. I’ve never been away from him like this. He’s come to see me throughout the tour, and I figured you’d meet him when the time was right. I just needed to get through the tour. I didn’t expect…”
“I’d like to get a paternity test,” he said. As if she hadn’t spoken a word. “If you won’t willingly do it, I’ll get a court order to make it happen.”
She gulped and looked everywhere but at him. “I only came here to dance and to provide for Leo. It’s obviously not working. I need to leave-” She stopped when he grabbed her arm.
“You’re not making sense. We have more than worked, we’ve had something between us from the very beginning … or at least, the beginning that I can remember. But that has nothing to do with this. Or maybe everything to do with it. I just want to know the truth! Why aren’t you telling me the truth?” he asked desperately.
“You’re not listening. I am telling you the truth! I have raised him and loved him and he is just fine without someone who is a drunk, drug-addicted, woman-chasing dick of a father. He’s mine. Now, let go of my arm.”
“You conveniently left out the time frame of when we slept together. How long ago was that? And what happened? Did we not use a condom?”
Roxie swallowed but didn’t answer.
Anger washed over him like a red haze. He had tunnel vision for Roxie and she had to grip the wall to keep from crumbling to the floor.
“You fuckin’ answer me, dammit. You don’t get to go silent on me anymore,” he whispered in her ear. “I’ve been drowning in those eyes from day one. I just didn’t realize they were going to be the death of me.”
The infatuation and lust unraveled around her, dropping instantly. The genuine affection she’d recently felt for him shriveled up. She’d thought they might actually be falling for each other, something real this time, but could see that was gone nearly as quickly as it came. They say there’s a fine line between love and hate, but since it wasn’t really love yet, it was so easy to dive right back into hate.
When Nate spoke, Beckham jumped back. For a moment, Roxie had forgotten anyone else was in the room.
“You can settle this easily, Roxie. Please don’t make it complicated. I’m sorry we bombarded you today—we didn’t even know you’d be with Beckham—but it looks like you have some explaining to do. Beckham deserves to know the truth. If this drags out in court, it will be a huge spectacle and cause an untold amount of grief for all of you. Reporters are already all over it. If we settle it quietly, it will become old news fast.”
Roxie looked at Beckham, not even trying to hide the terror in her eyes. She touched his arm and her hand was shaking.
“Please, believe me.” Her lips trembled. “He’s not yours.”
Beckham moved back until his legs hit the couch. He sat down and stared at Roxie, his eyes lifeless.
He looked at Nate and Anthony. “Can you find out how to get a paternity test done quickly? I want to be absolutely positive one way or the other.”
“It will be easy if you are both agreeable to it,” Nate said. “We can get someone to come test all of you—I don’t think it takes very long to get the results. Roxie, you won’t resist a DNA test, will you?”
She shook her head. “No. But it’s a waste of time.”
“Find someone who is reliable and can keep their mouth shut,” Beckham said, ignoring her.
Nate nodded and immediately started dialing his cell. “I’ll be right back.” He held his finger up and left the bus.
“I’ll just give you two a moment.” Anthony backed out of the bus.
She could feel Beckham’s eyes on her. She avoided looking at him.
“Why won’t you tell me when it happened?” he asked.
“I feel just as sucker-punched as you, Beckham. The three of you all staring me down with hungry eyes when we’re discussing my son. I can see now why
you might wonder if he’s yours, but it never crossed my mind that you would since he isn’t. I met his father right after you and went out with him because, silly me, he looked a little bit like you.”
“I’m sick of your smart-ass mouth,” he muttered.
“Well, you’ve been all about it before now. Make up your damn mind.”
He glared at her.
“Let me know when you want to do the test and I’ll come back. In the meantime, I’m getting out of here.”
“Don’t even think about trying to get out of this, Roxie.”
She leaned over him and got in his face.
“You can quit with the threats right about now. I might be bitchy, but I’m not a liar. I told you what happened between us and I don’t owe you jack shit. And so help me, if my little boy is hurt in ANY way whatsoever because of this, you will pay.”
He waved his hand dismissively, looking like he might hit the wall again. “Go,” he hissed at her, “get out of here.”
Roxie went back to the hotel and straight to her room, immediately looking up ‘paternity tests’ online. She was terrified there would be some loophole that would give Beckham doubt and he would try to take Leo away from her. She hoped he wasn’t that vindictive, but she’d seen a side of him today she hadn’t seen before and it scared her. When she saw that tests were 99% effective, she fell back on the bed and tried not to hyperventilate.
Johnny had gone back and forth with her from the bus to the hotel. When she walked to the pool to get Leo, the Sterlings had just left. Al was there guarding Leo and Chloe. Johnny told her Al would most likely start watching Leo full-time. Two additional guards would cover the other shifts. She didn’t have time to have a freak out that she now had a life that involved needing constant security, but she was positive that would catch up with her later. Leo was splashing around the kiddie pool and Chloe had her feet in the water.
“Hi, loves!” She put on a cheerful face.
“Get in, Mom!” Leo sang.
“I need to talk to Chloe for a minute and then I will,” she said.
“What’s going on? You have the death grin on your face right now,” Chloe said softly.
“You’re not going to believe what just happened. I’m going to have to say it in code.”
Chloe nodded and leaned in. “I have something to tell you too.”
“Oh. You go first.”
“A reporter came looking for you. Ian put her in her place and his bodyguard, Will, made sure she left. Will is hot.” She laughed. “Okay, your turn.”
“News is saying Woods is-” Roxie mouthed the rest. “Leo’s dad.”
“Where in the world did they get that?”
“I have no idea.”
“Well, what did you tell Bec-Woods?” Chloe looked at Leo, but he was on the other side of the pool, swimming toward them.
“That he’s not, of course!” Roxie said it through her teeth and smiled at Leo as he got closer.
“So he’s really not?” Chloe asked softly.
“Really not what?” Roxie’s forehead went into tiny creases.
“Really not Beckham’s?” she asked incredulously.
“I can’t believe this.” Roxie shook her head. “No, he’s not. Why? You thought he was?”
“Well, yeah, I kinda did,” Chloe admitted. “You’ve never told me everything that happened that night with Beckham. He even looks like him, Rox! I’ve thought it more than ever with you being on this tour—you’ve been so weird with him.”
“Look, Mama, I can hold my breath underwater! Count!” Leo went under.
Roxie started whispering fast and snippy. “I lost my virginity to him, Chloe, and then he had no idea who I was the very next week. I’ve been carrying around that little grudge with me for the last 5 years or so.”
“Oh,” Chloe looked at Leo who popped up, “I hoped he was.”
“How many seconds was that? Twelve?”
“Maybe thirteen,” Roxie told Leo.
“I’m gonna do fifteen this time!” And back under.
“So he really is Kenneth’s?”
“Yes! I told you he was Kenneth’s back then!”
Chloe sighed.
“Why does everyone think I’m such a liar?”
Silence.
“And stop being so disappointed!” Roxie snapped. “Just because Beckham looks all shiny bright with his cleaned up self doesn’t mean he is.”
Leo popped up between their legs. “Was that fifteen?”
“Fourteen,” Roxie said.
Back under.
“It’s just sad because I bet Beckham actually wants him to be his. And no one is a bigger loser than Kenneth,” Chloe trailed off until the last words were barely said out loud.
Roxie started to say something and then stopped. It was true. Beckham had seemed almost disappointed when she’d said he wasn’t Leo’s father. She had a moment of sadness that Leo didn’t have that.
She’d barely dated Kenneth, quickly losing interest when he had nothing behind his good looks. They were over weeks before she found out she was pregnant and he wanted nothing to do with the baby. That was fine with her. She wanted nothing to do with Kenneth. Back then she’d wished it was Beckham’s baby. She went through stretches of romanticizing the whole situation, making Beckham the father, but the more trouble he got into, the further she got from that fantasy.
“It doesn’t do any good to wish. It’s just not true.”
“Well, damn.”
“What did you say, Auntie?” Leo’s head came out of the water and he was grinning.
“I said dammit,” she sighed.
She paced the floor and studied her makeshift collages. She wished she was back in her apartment where she could think clearly. Everything had gone to hell. There was no way that was Beckham’s son. No way. She was supposed to have his son.
She snatched the remote from the counter and turned off the TV. This changed everything. If Leo was Beckham’s son, she’d have to … accept him. She didn’t want to upset Beckham. If he lost his son, he’d have a hard time getting over that and it would take longer for him to love her. She’d just have to get Leo to like her.
She’d need a few more days than she thought to deal with this news. It was going to take a little more work. The heightened security had been a bitch to deal with—it was driving her insane.
She removed the tacks from the latest picture of Leo she’d just put up by her bed. One by one she dropped tacks in her hand until there were so many, she barely felt it when one pricked her and she began bleeding all over the linoleum. She fixed the small holes in the picture, trying to piece them back together with her fingernail. In some places, you could barely see there was a hole there, but in others, it gaped even wider. His eyes, in particular, looked weird with all the holes.
The longer she looked at it, the worse she felt. Tears ran down her face when she looked at Beckham’s son. She put a towel over his head and went and printed a new picture. When it popped out of the printer, she wiped her nose on her arm and pinned up his new picture.
There, that was better.
She would love him too. She’d always wanted to be a mother.
Everyone just needed to stay the hell away and let Beckham process everything he’d heard in the last two hours.
Nate called him an hour before he was supposed to go onstage. “I’m bringing someone to do the testing during intermission. It’ll take a few days to get the results back, but we can get started on finding out the truth.”
“Thanks, Nate. In the meantime, what do I do about Roxie?”
“She’s a huge part of your show. I can’t imagine someone filling that role at this point. Can you two do your job, no matter the outcome of the test?”
“I can’t imagine pulling that off. At the moment, I regret ever meeting her.” He let out a big breath, not believing what he was saying. “I don’t know if I can move on, Nate. I’m beyond pissed. Why didn’t she tell me she had a little boy? She’s
had plenty of time to tell me. It just doesn’t add up.”
“I don’t know, Beck. Think about it, though, she could be telling the truth. Why wouldn’t she tell you if he was yours? She talked about providing for him. She could have gotten millions out of you by now, if that’s what she was after.”
Beckham squeezed his eyes shut. “You’re right. If he’s not mine, I’ll owe her a big ass apology. But if he is, I’m gonna have a hard time ever seeing her face again. I’ll just have to so I can see my son.”
The words ‘my son’ echoed around his brain, staggering him with their weight.
He thought of his conversation with Leo and how much he’d liked the kid in such a short amount of time. His heart raced at the thought of Leo being his little boy.
“Sounds like she’s gonna be around a while, either way.” Nate brought his attention back to the present. “Time to step up those acting skills.”
Anthony showed up before he left the bus.
“Roxie says she’s not dancing tonight,” he said, wringing his hands.
“Like hell she’s not. If I have to fake it, so does she.”
“Beckham, she’s shaken up. You need to talk to her. She told me about her burned clothes.”
Beckham lifted his eyes to the ceiling. In all the excitement, he’d forgotten about that. He felt bad for a moment, but then caught himself. What if this was just another stunt she was pulling? That didn’t make sense … why would she ruin all her clothes? He was losing it. Fuck it, he needed a drink more than life.
“Are you listening to me?” Anthony gave him a little shake. “We had to send someone out to buy her something to wear tonight. And then this with her … son. I don’t know—maybe it’s not a good idea.”
“Roxie thinks it’s Brooke messing with her things, which we need to deal with, but I can’t even think about that right now. We have security on Roxie. Howie set up security for Leo. And the press isn’t gonna hurt Roxie, they just want a story. She’ll be fine. Tell her if she wants her paycheck she needs to get out there.”
Anthony’s stare leveled him. “Beck, I know you’re angry, and I don’t know what to make of all this, but Roxie is not a bad person.” He put his hand on Beckham’s shoulder. “And I’ve never seen you happier than you were the other day, with her.”