Chapter 14
"I'm sorry I scared you," said Xavier Jones from outside her chain link fence. His movie star smile in place.
Clearing her throat of any food particles as gracefully as she could, she finally answered him. "Hello," she greeted, getting her mouth back in order and trying not to be pulled into him.
"I was taking a walk when I saw you." His expectant gaze raked over her.
"You were taking a walk?"
"Yes. . . I . . . Actually, Selena, I was hoping I'd run into you."
"You were?”
“Yes,” stated Xavier Jones.
“Why?" asked Selena, perplexed.
"I'd like to talk to you if that’s okay. May I?" he asked, indicating the fence gate.
"Sure," she said, not feeling like she had a choice. How could she tell him, Go away. You scare me. “You’re not dangerous are you?” Selena asked, somewhat playful but with serious undertones.
Xavier Jones grinned. “I’m only dangerous to bullies.”
You’re dangerous to me.
Xavier Jones stepped in and shut the gate behind him. Antonio, instead of barking, ran up to him excitedly. Xavier heartedly patted him as if they had been best friends for a long time.
"I love your dog," said Xavier.
"He's kind of different looking, but he's a good dog."
"He's a great dog," Xavier said, smiling as he sat next to Selena on the bench. He was so close to Selena that she could hear his every intake of light breath and numerous brazen goose bumps popped up on her skin.
Stop it! she demanded of herself. She decided that if she started speaking, she had a chance at halting the influx of confusing emotions.
"By the way, thanks again for what you did with Brad,” she blurted. “ I think it'll be the last time he insults anybody, including my dog."
"You're welcome. I really hate bullies,” he ascertained with fury and disgust as he said the later part.
Soda from the can Selena was drinking from and had set on the floor started spraying out as if someone had shaken it and then pulled its tab open. The dark liquid made a whooshing sound but then just as abruptly stopped.
“What was that?” Selena mumbled, shocked.
“That’s what happens with a carbonated drink,” he said quickly.
“But—“
“You never know with chemicals.”
“I guess so,” she muttered, still surprised. “I probably should’ve had lemonade.”
“Lemonade is good.”
“Xavier, would you like anything to drink?” Selena asked, getting her bearings back.
“No, thank you.”
"So what did you need to talk to me about?" asked Selena, curiosity getting the best of her.
"I've noticed that you've been avoiding me."
"What makes you think that?" Selena asked nervously.
"Because you have. Admit it."
“But—“
“C’mon, admit it. You know it’s true.”
Selena tore her sight away from his. "Okay, I have been avoiding you. I'm not very good at going around the truth."
"Your directness is one of the things I like best about you."
"Really? It's one of my biggest flaws according to my friends."
"They don't know what they're talking about."
Selena shrugged her shoulders. "I am who I am."
"Why have you been avoiding me, Selena?" Xavier Jones asked gently, his face completely concentrated on hers.
She quickly looked away. “You make me nervous,” she rushed.
“I make you nervous? Why?”
Selena shifted on the bench. “You’re always staring at me. Why do you do that?” she asked, stammering.
“I’m sorry. I don’t mean to make you nervous. I just think you’re beautiful.”
Selena let out a heavy sigh. “C’mon, Xavier. I’m not beautiful.”
“Have you looked in the mirror?”
“No one in school would ever describe me as beautiful.”
“That’s because they see you as the sweet nerd, and that’s all. They don’t really see all of you.”
“And you do?”
“Yes, I think so.”
"Why do you even want me to talk to you?” she blurted, changing the subject. “You seem to be a loner."
"I am, but I like talking to you. You're the one who doesn't seem to like me. Am I right?"
"Kind of."
"What do you mean 'kind of’?”
"Look, Xavier. I just don't care much for the ugly crowd, okay?"
“The ugly crowd?”
“You know—Cherise and Asher’s crowd.”
"I'm not in that crowd," he asserted.
“Cherise would like you to be.”
“But I’m not,” he insisted.
"You're popular and—"
"Not by anything I did. I can't help it if I came in the middle of the semester, and everyone is curious about me. Besides, you’re the popular one.”
“What do you mean?” she asked, fully perplexed.
“Everyone in school knows who you are, even the teachers.”
“I try to be helpful.”
“Believe me, no one says about me the great things they say about you. You’re the one who is popular. I’m nothing compared to you.”
“That’s not true,” Selena insisted. “You’re popular and all the girls are in love with you.”
"I don't know about that," he said, embarrassed and shifting in his seat.
"I know it."
“Stop that.”
“It’s true.”
"So what if some girls like me? What is it to you?" His interrogative gaze snapped into hers.
"It annoys me that they're judging you by your cover. They want you because of what you look like."
“And what do I look like?” he asked, baffled.
“Like a movie star.”
“Please,” he said, annoyed.
“It’s true.”
“Stop it. I don’t look like a movie star,” he said, frowning.
“You do.”
“I don’t.”
“But—“
"Well, whatever I Iook like, you're judging me by my cover too."
"What do you mean?" asked Selena.
"You don't like me because of the same reason they do."
"What?"
“You don’t like me because of what I look like. You should get to know me before judging me.”
“But—”
"Think about it."
“But—“
“Just think about it,” he said, standing up. "I'll see you at school."
Selena achingly watched him walk to the fence and step outside of it. He closed the gate and waived as he left. Her knuckles turned white as she grabbed hold of the bench, and she inhaled and exhaled profound breaths. Selena shook her head wishing he hadn't stopped by and unraveled what she had so neatly organized in her mind.
Chapter 15
Selena stood at the bus stop with Antonio flexing his tail next to her. Now that Brad no longer rode the bus, a certain tanquility permeated the air. With the bully gone, much tension had left with him. Moonflower stepped up to her and gushed excitedly about she and Saul having spent most of Sunday on the phone. Then Saul arrived and put his arm around Moonflower's shoulder.
"Hi, girls," he said.
"Hi, Saul," Selena greeted.
"Hi, you," gushed Moonflower.
"Hello," Xavier Jones murmured, having stepped in from behind them.
"Hi," they greeted in unison.
"How are you today, Selena?" Xavier Jones asked, carefully eyeing her with a mixture of familiarity and comfort. He stood so close to her, she had to start breathing through her mouth so she’d stop his personal scent of light musk from tingling in her nose.
"Good," she answered, embarrassed.
"I'll see you in class," he said, stepping away.
 
; "I think he's crushing on you, dude," whispered Saul.
"No, that's ridiculous," Selena stated.
"Yes, ridiculous," chimed in Moonflower.
Saul looked sly. "I know a secret. I was walking by here yesterday."
"And so what?" Selena asked nervously.
"I saw something. Two people on a bench."
Selena felt heat rise to her cheeks. "Would you stop being ridiculous?"
"What's he talking about?" asked Moonflower.
"Xavier visited me yesterday. We talked on the bench," Selena reluctantly informed Moonflower.
"He visited you?" questioned Moonflower with angry peaks in her voice, her round eyes shaped like straight slats.
"It was nothing," Selena stated.
“I know I didn’t like him at first but now he seems an okay guy. You should think about getting together with him, dude,” announced Saul.
Selena shook her head at him. “Yesterday was nothing.”
They quickly stepped onto the bus that had just arrived. Inexplicably, Selena could feel waves of anger from her friend trying to envelope and suffocate her. For the entire ride, Moonflower sat quietly and Saul did most of the chit chatting. Finally when they arrived at school and Saul left them at the door to their first period Pre-Calculus class, Moonflower immediately took her aside.
"I need to talk to you," Moonflower said sharply.
"What's wrong?"
"I never thought my best friend would do this to me," Moonflower said with a pained voice that was almost hard to understand because it cracked so much.
"What are you talking about?"
"Why didn't you tell me Xavier had visited you yesterday?"
"It's not a big deal,” Selena said with a tight voice.
"You should’ve told me."
"When I called you last night, all you wanted to talk about was Saul."
"You couldn't have interrupted me and told me about Xavier?" stammered Moonflower.
"What for?"
“Did he ask you out?”
“Of course not.”
Moonflower looked relieved. “You don’t want to go out with a freakoid.”
“Stop calling him that,” Selena said angrily.
Moonflower eyed her with smoldering suspicion. “Why do you always defend him?”
“Why do you always insult him?”
Moonflower let out a deep breath. “Selena, you can’t be serious about even being this guy’s friend.”
“Why?”
“He belongs in the Asher/Cherise group.”
“He’s not an ugly, Moonflower.”
“You’ve got a crush on him, right?” asked Moonflower, her voice demanding.
“No . . . of course not. I—“
“Yes, you do,” Moonflower stated, her voice breaking. “And he seems to like you too.”
“It’s not like that. It’s not—“
“He wouldn’t even give me the time of day.”
“I thought you didn’t like him,” Selena snapped. “You’re always calling him a freak.”
“That’s not the point,” Moonflower murmured.
“What’s the point?”
“I’m not good enough for him,” she uttered, a knot stuck in her throat. “Not good enough to get a little attention from someone like him.”
“Moonflower,” Selena said gently. She didn’t mind her friend’s theatrical side, but she did mind her insecure one when it turned ugly and self-mutilating. “Stop insulting yourself. Stop—“
"I don't understand what Xavier sees in you," Moonflower stated tearfully. "You're much fatter than I am."
Selena’s heart started aching. "That was mean."
“He’ll never love you.”
“You’re the one who can’t love yourself,” Selena blurted, walking away.
Selena stumbled into the packed cafeteria with her heart still gushing bitter tears. For the whole Pre-Calculus period, neither Moonflower nor her had spoken a single solitary word to one another. Moonflower sat at a lunch table with Saul and other friends. No empty seats were available, giving Selena the impression that she wasn’t welcomed there. She picked up her tray with a hamburger and walked to the nearest empty space. Others gasped in surprise at her not sitting with Moonflower.
"You can sit with us," said Cora Rivera, the head cheerleader and a student Selena had tutored the previous year.
"Thanks, Cora, but I'm fine." Cora sat next to her boyfriend and Selena didn't want to disturb their intimate time.
Selena looked forlornly at her hamburger before taking a bite. She wondered how she could be on such bad terms with her best friend. Nothing like this had ever happened. They had been friends since kindergarten and they had had arguments over the years but nothing as serious as this. It was especially difficult for Selena because she couldn’t come to terms with what the conflict was actually about. Why was Moonflower so vicious about Xavier Jones when she was with Saul?
"May I?" asked a voice and when she turned to see who it was, Xavier Jones was pointing at the seat in front of her.
“Well, I—“
“Thank you,” he said, sitting down.
“I hadn’t finished answering,” expressed Selena, a sight annoyance in her voice.
“You don’t want me to sit here?” he asked, about to stand up.
Selena let out a sigh. “You might as well stay there.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes.”
"Why aren't you with Moonflower?" he asked.
How does he know her name? Selena wondered. She had never introduced them. He must be very observant.
"We aren't friends right now,” she stated.
"I'm sorry to hear that."
"I really don't want to talk about it."
"I know how you feel about your privacy, so I won't ask you anything else.”
"I appreciate that."
"Is it my imagination, or is this hamburger pretty good?" he asked as he bit into it.
Selena was glad for the change in subject.
Her sixth period assignment was not at all to Selena’s taste. She didn't like being paired up for projects. It was easier for her to be on her own, but Mr. Honeybee had insisted he had wanted a team of two to write about a new scientific discovery.
"You want to be my partner?" asked Xavier Jones.
Selena turned around to face him and forced herself not to stare. “I don’t know if that’s such a good idea.”
“Why not?”
Selena cleared her throat. “Most students don’t like being my partner.”“Why not?”
“I’m very obsessive about my work,” Selena asserted. “Sad but true.”
“I’m the same way.”
“I drive people crazy with it. Even Moonflower won’t work with me.” Selena winced when she said the name of her estranged best friend.
He seemed to have caught it because the next thing she knew he was beaming her a comforting smile. Selena felt she should take her sight away from his intense one, but she didn’t. Instead, she gave him a weak smile, and he gently placed his hand on hers.
“Your skin is warm,” Selena declared. “Very warm.”
Chapter 16
“I guess my blood runs a little warm,” Xavier explained nervously as he yanked his hand back.
"It's not just a little warm," Selena stated.
"Well, whatever. Now, about Mr. Honeybee’s assignment,” he said, changing the subject. “We should be partn—“
“I still don’t think that’s a good idea. Believe me, you don’t want to be with me.”
“I think I can handle being your partner,” he stated.
“But—“
“Selena, you have to be paired up with someone. It might as well be me,” he insisted.
“I don’t think you know what you’re getting into,” she asserted.
“Selena,” he said firmly, “you don’t scare me.”
“I sh
ould.”
He chuckled. “Really?”
“Yes, really,” she said, throwing his words back to him from when they had been talking about Anne Frank.
“Selena, I promise you I can handle what you throw at me. We’ll be partners, okay?”
"Okay," Selena said, giving up. Students were starting to stare at them, and she wanted the attention away from her.
"It'll be fun."
"I'm sure," Selena said as she turned around, happy to get out from under his spell.
When the bell rang, Xavier Jones stood in front of her, preventing her from rushing away. "Do you mind if I walk with you to the bus?"
Selena’s mouth turned as dry as the desert. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“Another bad idea on my part, huh?” he said, smiling wryly. “Why is that one a bad idea?”
“I . . . I . . . I have got to go to my locker first. You don’t want to have to go all the way to my locker, do you?” That was all Selena could think of.
"Let's go."
All curious eyes were intently on them. Gossip would soon be spreading everywhere like jello left in the sun. Asher abruptly stopped talking to her best friend as Selena and Xavier passed by. Cherise quickly turned to look, her whole demeanor knotted itself into a burning ball of fire. Asher's brother, Chad, had trouble concentrating while speaking to Steve Harmon, the captain of the football team. Good grief! What’s wrong with these people, Selena thought. She hated that there were those eyeing her as if she was dirt, as if she was non deserving of being in the presence of Xavier Jones.
"They're all staring at us," Selena said, annoyed.
"Who cares," declared Xavier Jones.
"I don't like being the center of attention."
"I don't either, but you have to ignore stupid things."
“How do you ignore stupid things?”
“It takes practice.”
“Practice makes perfect?” Selena asked.
“Absolutely.”
Selena nodded. "Yeah, okay. I’ll try."
The silver water fountain across from them started clanging so loud that everyone in the hall turned to it. Suddenly, long sprays of translucent water shot in all directions. Fortunately, the janitor rushed to it and as soon as he turned the water lever, it stopped shooting water but continued making noise.
“We’d better hurry, or we’ll miss the bus,” Xavier Jones declared.
“That fountain thing was strange,” Selena stated.
“It’s normal for mechanical stuff to break down,” he mentioned nonchalantly.
“At least it got everyone to stop looking at us.”
"Don't let them bother you,” he stated.
“People staring at you doesn’t bother you at all?”