Except that it was. The twins remembered their father telling them about the Thompsons’ troubles, not that they had paid much attention back then.
“Oh,” Sugar said, putting two and two together.
“Excuse me?” Poppy asked, turning around in shock. The SUV jumped over a speed bump and the three of them flew up from their seats.
“Ow! Watch the road!” Sugar said, glaring at her sister.
“Sorry!” Poppy said. “You’re one of the au pairs?” she asked disbelievingly, looking at Eliza in the rearview mirror.
“Kind of,” Eliza admitted.
There was an ominous silence.
“Huh. Well, that’s gonna be fun, right? All three of us together again!” Sugar said cheerfully.
The SUV pulled up to the Perry homestead. Poppy pulled into the driveway and cut the engine. “We’re home,” she said brightly
“So, I’ll just run in and put on something patriotic and I’ll meet you guys back here?” Eliza asked, swinging her door open.
Sugar and Poppy exchanged a quick glance.
“You know what, I’m soooo pooped,” Sugar said, yawning.
“Me too,” Poppy agreed. “God, it’s been a really long night.”
“Yeah,” Eliza conceded.
“I think we’re just going to go to bed. We have tennis really early tomorrow, right, Pop?” Sugar asked. “We’ll see you later, Eliza.”
“Night,” Eliza said, unsteadily slipping out of the car onto the crunching gravel underfoot.
“Night,” the twins called, already halfway into the main house.
Eliza made her way down the stone path and opened the door to the au pairs’ cottage ever so slowly. She was trying to be quiet. Really, she was. But she snagged her stiletto heel on the rug and went sprawling. She crashed into a bedside table with a loud thud.
The light clicked on.
“What the hell?” Mara asked, blinking like an owl without her contact lenses. She put on her glasses and glanced at the digital clock on the nightstand. “Eliza, it’s two in the morning!”
“So what?” Eliza asked, heaving herself up from the floor and falling backward into her bed. “It’s early!”
“For you, maybe,” Mara snapped. “Some of us actually worked today. What’s the deal with cutting out? Hey, are you drunk?”
“God, Mara, get a grip.” Eliza moaned. “I don’t know how to break it to you, but we’re in the Hamptons—hello? The Hamptons.”
“I know that,” Mara snapped.
But clearly she didn’t, thought Eliza.
“Where’s Jacqui?” Mara asked.
“I don’t know. Probably still having a lot of fun, unlike some people,” Eliza said pointedly. “You missed a great party.”
“I wasn’t invited,” Mara replied.
Right. Eliza looked uncomfortable. She had forgotten about that part. That was kind of mean of her, she realized, and she wasn’t a mean person—really. Just careless. But someone had to watch those bratty kids.
She peeled off her tank top and struggled out of her skirt, pulling on her favorite silk camisole and a pair of Brooks Brothers pajama bottoms. She was still feeling high from her night and caught a glimpse of the pool reflecting in the garden pathway lights, giving her an idea . . . the six-pack Jacqui had found was still in the cooler.
“Hey, Mar, what do you say we . . .,” she started to say, turning to her roommate. But Mara was already back asleep. Boy, Mara was one lame goody-goody.
Eliza hopped into bed, hitting her pillow just as an all-too-familiar rumble geared up outside. No, it can’t be, she thought, bolting upright.
“Get in!” she heard Sugar’s scratchy voice call.
She scrambled to the window and watched as Poppy ran out of the main house, wearing a red, white, and blue tank top and white jeans, looking furtively over her shoulder toward the au pairs’ cottage. Eliza’s stomach dropped as the car backed stealthily away, the headlights sweeping the road only after they’d made it out of the driveway without the lights. I invented that trick, thought Eliza.
They were going to the party after all.
It was all well and good to hang out with her at a VIP room or two—but when it came to hitting the real action, she was just deadweight.
The truth hit her hard, and for a minute she was back in her bedroom in Buffalo on yet another lonely Friday night. No one had asked her to be on prom committee even if it was obvious she had more style than anybody else in the class. They’d all thought she was such a snob when she turned up for her first day of school in a mink chubby. But hell, it was cold up there.
This summer was supposed to be different—she was supposed to be back with the old posse, back in the limelight, back in the lap of luxury, where she belonged. She thought Sugar and Poppy were her friends.
She thought back over the evening, looking for clues. So much had happened and she’d had so much to drink. It was mostly a fun, loud, Gucci-Envy-scented blur. But she did remember one thing: they hadn’t even thanked her for paying the valet.
A blistering day at the beach
MARA SHOOK ELIZA’S SHOULDER. IT WAS ALMOST NOON and she was annoyed. Jacqui was nowhere to be found and Eliza had slept in all morning. Only Mara had shown up to feed the kids their breakfast in the main house (a grapefruit for Madison, gluten-free pancakes for Zoë and William, mashed rice cereal for Cody).
“What time is it?” Eliza asked sleepily.
Mara told her. “Hurry up. Anna wants us to take the kids to the beach. They’re already in the car.”
Eliza grumbled as she hoisted herself up against her pillows. She blinked at the tiny attic room. Where on earth was she? Then she remembered. The Hamptons. Working for the Perrys. As an au pair. God, it was depressing.
“Where’s Jacqui?”
Mara shrugged. “I don’t think she came home last night,” she said with a hint of disapproval in her voice.
Eliza yawned. “Good for her.” She padded to the bathroom to get ready, just as Jacqui walked into the room.
“Hola chicas!” Jacqui greeted, a blissful expression on her face. She was glowing and fresh-faced, although Mara noticed she was still wearing last night’s clothes.
Mara frowned. “Anna’s on a rampage. I suggest you guys meet me and the kids in the main house in five minutes if you all don’t want to get in trouble.” Mara was irritable from their little stunt the night before, and determined not to let them get away with it again. She stormed off, and Eliza and Jacqui exchanged dismayed expressions.
“What crawled up her butt and died?” Eliza asked. Jeez. She hadn’t bargained on having to spend her summer with some hick from the sticks, who was so obviously a little tattle-tale, as well.
Jacqui shrugged. That morning, she and Luca had more than made up for their months apart, and she was still in a romantic daze. She was also sporting a few red hickeys on her neck from their passionate reunion. “She needs um amante. A lover,” Jacqui decided. That was Jacqui’s solution to everything. Jacqui had had one boyfriend or another ever since she turned thirteen and it was the only way she felt totally comfortable.
“Don’t we all,” Eliza sighed.
* * *
They changed into their shorts and swimsuits and met Mara and the kids by the driveway. William was jumping up and down in the gravel driveway, the baby was bawling in his car seat, and the little girls sat in the very back of the SUV with bored faces.
“William! Please get in the car!” Mara pleaded.
“C’mon,” Eliza said, picking up William and shoving him in the car. “You better behave or I’m enrolling you in ballet with your sisters.” That sobered him up. Mara wished she’d thought of that.
Eliza walked to the driver’s seat. “I’ll drive, I know how to get there.”
Mara nodded, thankful for the help. They piled in and Eliza drove to Georgica Beach. They dropped Jacqui off to go grab lunch at the snackbar and Eliza gave her instructions on where to meet them. It was a struggle
keeping all of the kids together, but Eliza finally chose a spot on the sand that was far from where her old crowd hung out. She shook out the towels and reclined on a beach chair. She still had a pounding headache from the night before, and the kids’ whining wasn’t helping any, but boy did it feel good to be back at Georgica.
Mara affixed a floppy sun hat on Cody’s head and began to slather sunscreen on the girls. When Zoë and Madison were good and covered, she tried her luck with William. “Sit still! Wait! I still have to do your back!” Mara pleaded, but William kept jumping and wriggling away.
“I give up!” Mara sighed. She looked around. Eliza was asleep on her towel. They’d dropped Jacqui off almost an hour ago, but she was still missing. What a surprise.
* * *
“What happened to him?” Eliza asked, horrified, hours later when she woke up and noticed William’s raw, red face.
“What do you mean?” Mara said. She had been so busy playing with the girls and Cody that she hardly noticed how red William had gotten. Mara had been so grateful when he’d finally gotten out of the waves and splayed out on a towel that it didn’t occur to her that laying down might be a tad uncharacteristic for the boy.
“I don’t feel too good,” William said. His entire body was an angry crimson, and his eyes were watering.
“Haven’t you heard of sunblock?” Eliza asked Mara accusingly.
“I tried to put it on him,” Mara said weakly. “But he wouldn’t sit still!” She put a hand on his forehead. “He’s burning up!”
“Sunstroke. I’ve seen it happen to tourists. It’s bad. We should get him to the doctor,” Jacqui said, surveying the damage with a critical eye.
The girls panicked. William began to hyperventilate. Mara’s heart began beating hard against her chest. She scooped William up in her arms and ran to the car. Eliza and Jacqui packed up the remaining kids and the bags in helter-skelter fashion and scrambled after them.
* * *
At the hospital, they deposited an unconscious and feverish William in the arms of a gentle nurse and a kindly doctor, and handed the other three kids off to Laurie, who’d met them there. “I won’t tell Anna. For now. But call if you need me,” she said sternly before driving off.
“It’s my fault,” Mara said quietly. She felt terrible for neglecting him. It didn’t even occur to her that he had been Eliza and Jacqui’s responsibility as well.
“Well, he really wouldn’t stay still,” Eliza conceded. That was as close to an admonition of guilt as Eliza would get. Still, she was really worried about the kid—and not just because they might get fired.
Jacqui murmured a short prayer. The worst of it was that she knew from experience that sunstroke was easily prevented. She felt a twinge of guilt for sneaking out to meet up with Luca for lunch.
They waited in the little outdoor room, debating whether or not to call Anna. Mara said yes. Eliza said no. And in the end, it was Jacqui’s deciding vote for what she doesn’t know won’t hurt her that finalized their decision not to call.
* * *
When the doctor emerged, the news was good. Minor sun stroke. Nothing ice packs, fluids and bed rest wouldn’t cure. They almost cheered when William ran out, just as spastic as ever.
Eliza tousled his hair. “You gave us a quite scare!”
“Next time will you sit still?” Mara asked.
William only grinned. Jacqui hugged him.
“What’s that on your neck?” He asked her.
Jacqui blushed.
* * *
They returned home hoping not to run into Anna. No such luck. She had just returned from the salon and pulled up to the house at the same time.
“Anyone care to explain?” She demanded when she saw William.
“Um, it was the sunscreen. I don’t think it was strong enough,” Eliza said smoothly.
“But he’s fine,” piped in Jacqui. “Right, Will?” William just smiled and pointed at her hickey. He was definitely fine.
“Drugstore brands are really ineffective,” Eliza said, playing up to Anna’s snobbishness. “There’s a really good one from Zurich that is divine.”
“Order some for tomorrow,” Anna allowed, and turned away without even saying hello to any of the children.
The three breathed a sigh of relief. And then William ran off, as though nothing had happened at all.
the girls have finally learned how to locate the fridge under all that french cabinetry
TWO WEEKS AFTER THE TWINS DITCHED HER BEFORE the PlayStation2 party, Eliza stood by the washbasin in the laundry room, trying to get the mud off Sugar’s Escada tennis whites. This was so not what she had prepared for when she told Kevin Perry she would “help out with the kids” this summer.
Poppy and Sugar’s snub had hit Eliza hard, but she still managed to claw her way back into the scene through her old friends Taylor and Lindsay, who had instant access to every guest list event in town, from store openings to movie premieres. The three of them hit a different nightclub every night, all while Eliza strategically avoided the Perry twins. It was harder to pretend they didn’t exist back at the house, where the blond brats kept her busy with countless mundane tasks. Eliza didn’t mind so much since it appeared Sugar and Poppy had failed to mention her diminished status to anyone in the clique. Were they being nice or just indifferent? Eliza couldn’t hazard a guess, but she was thankful for the reprieve in public, at least.
“There,” she said, holding the soiled cloth up to the light. “That should be good enough.”
She had ruined her manicure in the process, but at least she wouldn’t wake up tomorrow morning to hear Sugar’s hoarse voice asking her ever so sweetly why her tennis skirt wasn’t hanging in her closet. She walked out to the kitchen, where Mara was sitting in front of a bowl, her forehead knit in concentration as she carefully balanced a small green object on her fingers.
“What are you doing?” Eliza asked.
“What does it look like I’m doing? I’m peeling Madison’s grapes,” Mara explained, as if it were the most normal thing in the world.
“Hell no.” Eliza still couldn’t believe some of the things they had to do for these kids.
Mara gingerly took an edge of the grape and peeled off its skin. The bowl in front of her held about two dozen similarly skinless specimens.
“Where’s Jacqui?” Eliza asked.
“Feeding Cody dinner. It’s her turn.” And for once Jacqui was actually there to do it.
Eliza made a face. Talk about a thankless undertaking. The girls had learned not to stand in the line of fire when Cody hurled after every meal. Two words: projectile vomit.
“MERDA!” Jacqui stormed into the kitchen from the dining room. A river of green-colored puke ran down the length of her cotton dress. “Why does everything he eats have to be hand chopped?” she ranted. “Has this woman never heard of baby food? This makes his stomach virada!”
They grunted in sympathy.
Madison walked in and helped herself to a grape. “Bleh,” she said, spitting out a chewed-up mess.
“What’s wrong now?” Mara sighed.
“They’re not cold enough. And that one still has its skin on a little bit.”
Mara wanted to throw her hands up in despair. Madison’s grapes were never cold enough or peeled properly or else could not be eaten because they were deemed “funny looking.” Mara knew the kid was just rebelling against the strict diet her stepmother had put her on, but it was seriously making her own life difficult.
“There’s nothing wrong with them,” Eliza said, taking one and popping it into her mouth. “Yum. I wish I had somebody to peel my grapes. You’re a lucky girl.”
Madison looked at Eliza doubtfully but began to eat the grapes without complaint. A miracle.
The door swung open again and this time Anna walked into the kitchen. The three au pairs froze, wondering what was wrong now.
“Has anyone seen the mail?” She asked.
They shook her heads. Laurie h
ad told them that Anna was desperately waiting for an invitation to a dinner party at Calvin Klein’s house. Unfortunately, it had yet to arrive.
“Anna? Could we ask you something?” Mara assayed.
“Yes?”
“The kids keep talking about these other girls—who, um, used to take care of them? Do you know what they’re talking about?”
“Some girls named Camille, and Tara, or something,” Eliza added.
Anna scowled. “Yes. They used to work here. But we don’t talk about them,” she said sternly. “Do you understand?”
They nodded. Obviously, the former au pairs were a sore subject. But the girls’ curiosity was doubly piqued. What had they done that was so bad? If only someone would tell them. It obviously hadn’t been letting one of the kids fry like a potato chip. They’d done that and they were still here. But they had to find out, because as all three of them agreed, they couldn’t afford to make the same mistake.
After cleaning up the kitchen and putting the kids to bed, the au pairs staggered back to their dingy room.
“God! What a week!” Eliza said, flopping into the only armchair. Between the cooking and the cleaning and the scrambling out of a VIP room whenever she spotted any sign of the twins’ blond heads, Eliza was exhausted.
“Seriously,” Mara agreed, thinking about the week spent catering to the whims of four adorable but very spoiled children.
Jacqui had disappeared into the bathroom to change. She was meeting Luca for dinner at The Laundry, a romantic French restaurant.
Eliza looked at the clock. It was nine. Too early to hit the clubs yet. “You know what? We deserve a little break.”
“What have you got in mind?” Mara asked.
Eliza smiled mischievously. “Look what I found.” She grinned, holding up an antique key that just happened to unlock the Perrys’ liquor cabinet. It was about time they had a little fun.
the best way to find out a secret? a bottle of grey goose and a game of truth
AN EMPTY VODKA BOTTLE ROLLED DOWN THE THREADBARE carpet.