The Space Brigade stared at Horatio. Surely it couldn't be that easy.
'My great-grandmother was a stickler for good manners,' said Horatio. 'That's why there is all that stuff about "politely" and "respectfully".'
'But Enrico would just ignore the Constitution,' said Sean. 'Or maybe he's even changed that rule already.'
'Nobody can change the Constitution,' said Horatio. 'That's clause number 1739-ZZZZ-1749237937432798489, which says, "The Constitution is perfect, thanks very much, and cannot and shall not ever be changed." And the Constitution certainly cannot be ignored, even by Naughty Enrico. The little rogue!'
'Well,' said Nicola doubtfully. She could so easily imagine Enrico curling his lip and saying he was far too important for the Constitution to apply to him. 'But why hasn't anyone thought of this before?'
'I expect because the Constitution takes up over two thousand volumes and nobody can be bothered to read it all,' said Horatio.
Suddenly Nicola was filled with hope. This will solve everything. This mission will be as easy as pie! We'll just arrange for a petition as long as a rainbow calling for Enrico's resignation!
She shook herself. 'Why does this valley make you feel so hopeful?' she asked Horatio.
'They say that it's this particular species of tree.' Horatio pointed out a gnarled old tree with fat purple leaves. 'It's called the Hope Tree. Apparently it releases a particular chemical that triggers a feeling of hopefulness.'
'So it's not real,' said Greta, looking disappointed.
'Oh, hopes are always real,' said Horatio. 'It's just that most of the time we try to squish them down. In the valley, our hopes are allowed to grow and flourish - like they should!'
As they were packing up their picnic, Shimlara said to Horatio, 'May I ask you a question, Horatio?'
'Certainly.'
'Why do you live here in the valley all alone? Don't you have a family?'
'I had a falling out with my family many years ago,' said Horatio. 'There was a terrible argument over the merits of milk chocolate versus dark chocolate. Unforgivable things were said - mostly by me. I stormed off in a huff one stormy night and ended up here.'
Horatio's face filled with despair as he recalled that night. Then suddenly it cleared as though the sun had come out. 'But I know that one day my family will forgive me. Just when I least expect it, they'll turn up and tell me it's time to come home.'
'But Horatio, wouldn't it be better if you went and said sorry to your family?' said Nicola. 'They might not even know where you are!'
'Oh, if they'd forgiven me they would have found me by now.' Horatio settled himself back down on his log. 'I'm sure they'll be along any minute. Don't worry about me.'
Nicola couldn't think of anything further to say. She looked around at the others, who were climbing up on to their well-rested ShobGobbles. They shrugged slightly.
Quicksilver pawed at the ground. It was time for their journey to continue.
'Let's go,' Nicola said.
20
Nobody in the Space Brigade said anything as they once again followed the paved path through the Valley of High Hopes.
Ridiculously hopeful thoughts continued to creep into Nicola's head.
I expect I'll win a trip to Disneyland soon. Maybe in a raffle. Or I might find the winning ticket in a cereal box.
I bet they stop teaching maths in school soon. It's not as if anybody LIKES it - except for the people who are good at it, and they don't need to learn it anyway!
'I think we must have reached the bottom of the valley,' called out Tyler. 'We seem to be heading up again.'
He was right. Nicola could feel it was more of an effort for Quicksilver as the path ahead became steeper. She stroked the creature's feathery mane to show her appreciation.
An hour passed and the light was becoming brighter.
'I can smell chocolate again,' said Sean, sniffing deeply.
Nicola saw an archway ahead with a sign. As they got closer, she read:
THANK YOU FOR VISITING THE VALLEY OF HIGH HOPES
May your HOPES continue to fly high . . . COME AGAIN!
The ShobGobbles trotted under the archway and suddenly the Space Brigade were all squinting, blinking and reaching for their sunglasses as they came out into the sunlight and the blinding colours of the rainbows.
Nicola's sunglasses were looking a bit out-of-date compared to Greta's oversized movie-star pair. I'll have to get some new ones before I compete in the Olympic Games, she thought. After all, I'll have all those television cameras - wait a second! Suddenly she realised there was no way in the world she was going to be an Olympic athlete. She smiled at herself, as all those crazy hopes drifted away, but their memory lingered, like the taste of something delicious.
'Let me check the map,' she called out to the others.
Everyone pulled up their ShobGobbles, and Nicola took out the map.
'Next we cross the Raging River at the Safe Hands Bridge,' she said.
'I can't see any sign for the Raging River,' said Shimlara.
'Neither can I,' said Nicola. 'I guess we'll just have to head west. So that would be, um . . .' She looked up helplessly at the rainbows arching over them. Which way was west? She had absolutely no idea.
'We need a compass,' said Tyler.
'Ahem,' said Greta. They all turned to look at her. She was holding her compass up high. 'Luckily some of us packed something useful.'
'Oh, well done,' said Nicola, wishing she'd been the one to bring a compass.
'Don't worry, Nic,' said Sean. 'I'm sure your jar of turmeric will come in useful soon.'
Nicola made a face at him.
Greta studied the compass for ages with a deadly serious expression on her face, until Sean said, 'Are you sure you know what you're doing?'
'Of course I do,' snapped Greta. 'Unlike Nicola, I have brilliant navigational skills.' She looked up from the compass and pointed to her left. 'That way.'
'Good,' said Nicola. She looked at her watch. 'We'll try and go a bit faster. We don't want to be crossing the river in the dark.'
Nicola saw Sean give her a grin of understanding.
'Will you be all right going a bit faster, Greta?' Nicola asked innocently.
'I'll be fine,' said Greta grimly.
Nicola tapped her feather hard and Quicksilver responded by breaking into such a fast gallop Nicola was sure she would fall. That would make Greta completely unbearable.
After a few seconds she managed to get her rhythm back and start to enjoy the sensation of pelting across a snowy field, the air rushing against her face. They passed another marshmallow mine, a village and a ramshackle old school.
A few minutes later, she saw a sign saying RAGING RIVER, with an arrow pointing straight ahead. They pounded along, going up a small hill, and Nicola caught a glimpse of a frozen sea in the distance before they plunged down again, following a winding track in and out of huge grey tree trunks that soared as high as the arches of the rainbows.
There was a sound of rushing water.
'Whoa!' She pulled on Quicksilver's reins. 'I think we're here.'
Nicola looked with fascination at the river in front of her. She'd never seen such angry, powerful water. It frothed and boiled and bubbled like water bursting from a fireman's hose. There was no way you could swim in it - it would toss you about and tear you to pieces.
The river was so wide Nicola couldn't see the other shore. She looked around for the Safe Hands Bridge. There it was - a thin, rickety bridge that seemed to be held up by string.
'It doesn't look like you'd be in especially safe hands crossing that,' commented Shimlara as she and Sean pulled up on either side of Nicola.
'Let's just fly the ShobGobbles across,' said Sean.
Nicola noticed Quicksilver tense up and flatten his ears.
'I think it's too far for them,' she said, and Quicksilver relaxed.
Tyler arrived next. 'You wouldn't want to fall in,' he said, looking at the river nerv
ously. He wasn't a confident swimmer and always stayed at the shallow end of the pool.
They all turned around to look for Greta. She pulled up beside them a minute later, her face bright red. 'I'm sure we didn't really need to go that fast,' she said.
As they headed towards the bridge they came across a bearded, toothless man sitting in a picnic chair with his feet up on a long table in front of him.
'Shock-Sticks! Shock-Sticks! We've got the best-quality Shock-Sticks on Shobble!' chanted the man when he saw them.
'What are Shock-Sticks?' asked Sean.
'Well, they're to protect yourselves from the Biters, of course, young fella,' said the man. 'The river is full of them.'
'What's a Biter?' asked Nicola.
The man chuckled. 'Oh, come on now, don't you be pretending a smart-looking girl like you has never heard of a Biter. I won't be falling for that.'
'We really don't know,' said Nicola. 'We come from another planet.'
'Well, if you really want to know, go and read that sign over there.' The man gestured at a small wooden sign near the bridge. He peered up at her. 'Hey, do I know you from somewhere?'
'I don't think so,' said Nicola.
'Biters,' said Sean, as they rode their ShobGobbles towards the sign. 'I wonder if they're like mosquitoes.'
When they got to the sign, they all read it silently together.
WARNING!
THIS RIVER IS HOME TO THE NATIVE BITER. BITERS ARE RIVER-DWELLING CREATURES ABLE TO GROW TO SIX METRES IN LENGTH. AN ADULT BITER HAS OVER TWO THOUSAND RAZOR-SHARP TEETH AND IS ABLE TO LEAP OVER THIRTY METRES IN THE AIR. ALTHOUGH THEY ARE HERBIVORES, BITERS ENJOY ATTACKING HUMANS OF ALL SHAPES AND SIZES. THEY TAKE LARGE BITES AND THEN IMMEDIATELY SPIT OUT THE BLOODY FLESH (ALMOST WITH DISGUST). AS THE NORMAL HABITAT OF THE BITER IS DARK, MURKY AND UNDERWATER, THEY ARE EXTREMELY SURPRISED WHEN A WHITE LIGHT IS SHONE IN THEIR EYES. THIS HAS LED TO THE DEVELOPMENT OF THE 'SHOCK-STICK' - AN EFFECTIVE FORM OF PROTECTION AGAINST THE BITER. TO AVOID UPSETTING FATALITIES, ANYONE CROSSING THE SAFE HANDS BRIDGE SHOULD CARRY A SHOCK-STICK AT ALL TIMES.
'They don't sound much like mosquitoes,' said Sean.
21
'We don't have any money to buy Shock-Sticks,' said Nicola.
'But the Shobblings don't get paid for anything,' Shimlara reminded her. They had left their ShobGobbles snacking on more indigo berries and were heading back to the bearded, toothless man who now had his head buried in a newspaper.
'Excuse me,' said Nicola.
The man looked up and his eyes flew from Nicola to the newspaper and back again.
'I knew I recognised you!' he said triumphantly. He turned the newspaper around. On the front page was a large photo of Nicola sitting astride Quicksilver. The headline read:
EARTHLING SAYS 'ENRICO TOOK KATIE HOBBS
HOSTAGE'
Comment from the Commander's Press Office: ABSOLUTE GARBAGE
Story by: Jenny Jenkins
Nicola read the first paragraph of the article.
A spokesperson for Enrico strenuously denied the Earthling's allegation that the visiting hairity, Katie Hobbs, had been taken hostage. 'Why would we take Katie hostage?' he said. 'She is Enrico's special guest. The Earthling must have rocks in her head.' This reporter is interested to note, however, that Katie herself was not available for comment. Could our much-loved Commander be bending the truth?
Oh dear, thought Nicola. Enrico wasn't going to be happy about this bad publicity. What had she been thinking? She should have kept her mouth shut.
'You really should have kept your mouth shut, Nicola,' said Greta, leaning over Nicola's shoulder to read the story.
'So is it true?' asked the man. As he leaned forward to hear Nicola's answer, he tipped back his straw hat, revealing his forehead and a tiny tattoo of the letter 't'. Nicola relaxed - he was a Topaz supporter.
'Yes,' answered Nicola.
'But why would the Commander do that?'
'He's trying to force us to kill Topaz Silverbell,' said Nicola. 'But don't worry, we would never hurt Topaz!'
'Well, that's a relief!' said the man. He put the newspaper to one side. 'I'm assuming you'd all like to arm yourselves with Shock-Sticks before you cross the river?'
'Yes,' said Nicola. 'But we're not sure how we pay you.'
'No need for money!' said the man cheerily. 'Haven't you heard? The Shobblings are the nicest people in the galaxy.'
He handed each of them a long thin stick made out of a hard gold material. It was about the length of a baseball bat. There were two buttons at one end of the stick labelled SHOCK and RETREAT.
'Let me show you how it works,' said the man.
He held out the Shock-Stick in front of him like a sword and pressed the SHOCK button. The stick sprang out to at least triple its length. There was a bright white light at the end.
'I recommend yelling "GOTCHA!" at the same time,' said the man. 'Just my little tip. I think it adds to the shock value. Make sure the light shines directly into the Biter's eyes. Then just press the RETREAT button.' The stick sprang back to its previous size. 'Easy, eh?'
'What if a Biter comes at you from behind?' asked Shimlara.
'It's advisable to watch each other's backs when you're crossing the bridge.'
'What if you're the last one in the line?'
'Try not to be!' chortled the man. 'Or put your least favourite person last!' He handed each of them a Shock-Stick. 'Good luck! I'm sure you'll all make it across the bridge. Or most of you, anyway. Ha ha!'
The Space Brigade gave him sickly smiles.
Holding to their Shock-Sticks, they walked back to the ShobGobbles.
'I'll go last,' said Nicola bravely.
'I should go last because I'm the tallest,' said Shimlara.
'That's exactly why you shouldn't go last!' said Nicola. 'You'll be a target for the Biters.'
'I should go last because I'm the oldest,' said Sean.
'Well, I should go last, because, um, I wear glasses,' said Tyler.
'What's that got to do with anything?' said Greta. 'I should go last because I'm the least favourite person.'
There was a stunned silence. Everybody turned to look at Greta in shock and embarrassment. It was actually true - but it wasn't the sort of thing you were meant to say out loud. Nicola felt terrible. Imagine being in a group where you knew you were the least popular person.
Greta shrugged. 'It's fine. I'm really popular in other groups, like my maths club. It's just that you people don't really get me.'
Nicola said sternly, 'You are not the least favourite person. I'm going last because I'm the leader and that's all there is to it. Shimlara, you go first.'
Silently, they all climbed back on to their ShobGobbles, their feather-whips and Shock-Sticks held nervously aloft. With Shimlara leading the way, they clip-clopped towards the Safe Hands Bridge.
'Just remember, we're doing this for Katie!' called out Nicola as their ShobGobbles began to cross the bridge in single file.
She tried not to look at the water below. The bridge swayed back and forth as if they were on a ship.
Then Shimlara screamed.
The first Biter had shot straight up into the air from the river below.
Nicola caught a glimpse of a sleek wet body, an unspeakably evil mouth and tiny cruel eyes.
'GOTCHA!' cried Shimlara and pressed the button on her Shock-Stick. At the sight of the bright white light, the Biter recoiled and dropped straight back into the river like a falling stone.
'Easy-peasy!' cried Shimlara, although her voice sounded a bit strained.
They continued on for several minutes without anything happening. Nicola felt her shoulders relax. Shimlara must have frightened off the Biters. They were now about halfway across.
Sean turned around in his saddle to grin back at Nicola. 'Looks like Shimlara will be the only one who gets to use her Shock-Stick.'
'No need to be disappointed,' said Nicola.
'I'm not,' said Sean unconvincingly
. 'I'm just saying -' His eyes widened and suddenly he released his Shock-Stick at a point just above Nicola's head and yelled, 'GOTCHA!'
'No need to thank -' began Sean.
'GOTCHA!' screamed Nicola. She pressed the SHOCK button on her Shock-Stick just in time to stun the Biter that had been about to sink its teeth into Sean's leg.
Suddenly the air around them was filled with dark flying shapes. Nicola didn't even have time to feel frightened. She was ducking, weaving, twisting to the left then the right as she thrust her Shock-Stick this way and that like a sword fighter. As fast as one Biter fell back into the river, another one leapt into the air to take its place. Some of them got so close Nicola felt their clammy, fishy flesh brush against hers. She didn't need to look at her Shock-Stick to find the buttons. Her thumb automatically zipped back and forth between the two buttons. Shock. Retreat. Shock. Retreat.
'YES!'
It was a relieved shout from Shimlara. Nicola looked up and saw that she'd reached the other shore. Next was Greta, followed by Tyler and Sean.
Quicksilver surged forward impatiently.
'Nicola!' shouted someone.
Nicola had lost concentration. She swung her head and glimpsed the deadly shape of a determined Biter. It was too late for her Shock-Stick. Cruel teeth sank into the flesh of her arm. Nicola yelled out in pain and fear and tried to jerk her arm away, losing her balance.
She gripped desperately with her knees, trying to right herself, but it was too late. At that moment, the bridge swerved violently and she was flung straight off Quicksilver's back.
Arms and legs flailing, she fell straight into the icy waters below.
22
The river was so cold it was like being punched in the stomach. Nicola gasped for air and swallowed water instead.
Choking and spluttering, she tried to swim, but the pull of the water was too strong. She was being carried away like a helpless twig. She looked up and saw the shore in front of her rapidly disappearing.