Chapter Seventeen
Convincing them to release a Strigoi-particularly when we had him trapped-wasn't easy. My questioning hadn't made sense to them either, but they'd gone along with it. Letting a Strigoi go? That was really crazy-even for the unpromised. They exchanged uneasy glances with one another, and I wondered if they'd disobey. In the end, my harshness and authority won out. They wanted me as their leader and put their faith in my actions-no matter how insane they seemed.
Of course, once we did let the Strigoi go, we had the new problem of making sure he actually went. At first, he started to attack again, and then, realizing he'd probably get overwhelmed, he finally skulked off. He gave us one last menacing look as he disappeared into the darkness. I didn't think being taken down by a group of teenagers had done a lot for his self-esteem. He gave me in particular a look of hatred, and I shuddered at the idea of him knowing my name. There was nothing to be done about it now; I could only hope my plan had a chance of working.
Denis and the others got over me letting the Strigoi go once we made a few other kills that week. We fell into a routine, investigating clubs and dangerous parts of town, relying on my senses to tell us when danger was near. It was funny to me how much the group soon began to rely on my leadership. They claimed they wanted no part of the guardians' rules and authority, but they responded surprisingly well to me telling them what to do.
Well, more or less. Every once in a while, I'd see a bit of that unhinged recklessness. One of them would try to play hero, underestimate a Strigoi, or go in without the rest of us. Artur nearly ended up with a concussion that way. As the largest of all of us, he'd gotten a bit cocky and was therefore caught off guard when a Strigoi threw him into a wall. It had been a sobering moment for all of us. For a few agonizing moments, I'd feared Artur was dead-and that it was my fault as their leader. One of Sydney's Alchemists had come-though I'd made sure not to be around, lest Abe find me-and had treated Artur. The guy said Artur would be fine with some bed rest, meaning he had to stop hunting for a while. It was hard for him to do-and I had to yell at him when he tried to follow us one night, reminding him of all their friends who had died before because of such stupidity.
Out in the human world, dhampirs tended to run on human schedules. Now I put myself on a nocturnal schedule, just like I'd been on at the Academy. The others followed suit, except for Tamara, since she had a day job. I didn't want to be asleep during the time Strigoi prowled the streets. I had called Sydney each time we left a kill, and word had to be getting around in the Strigoi community that someone was doing a lot of damage. And if the Strigoi we'd released had carried my message, some of those Strigoi could specifically come looking for me.
As days passed, our kills dropped a little, making me think the Strigoi were indeed being cautious now. I couldn't decide if that was a good or bad thing, but I urged the others to be extra careful. They were beginning to revere me as a goddess, but I took no satisfaction in their adoration. My heart still ached from all that had happened with Lissa and Dimitri. I wrapped myself up in my task, trying only to think of working the Strigoi community to get closer to Dimitri. But when we weren't out hunting Strigoi, I had a lot of downtime with nothing to do.
And so I kept visiting Lissa.
I'd known there were a lot of kids-like Mia-who lived at the
Royal Court
because their parents had jobs there. I didn't quite realize how many there were, though. Avery naturally knew them all, and to no one's surprise (at least not mine), most of them were spoiled and rich.
The rest of Lissa's visit had been a series of other functions and formal parties. The more she listened to royal Moroi talk business, the more it irritated her. She saw the same abuses of power she'd noted before, the same unfair way of distributing guardians like they were property. The controversial issue of whether Moroi should learn to fight alongside the guardians was also still a hot topic. Most of the people Lissa ran into at Court were of the old-school mentality: Let guardians fight and Moroi stay protected. After seeing the results of that policy-and the successes that had happened when people like Christian and I tried to change it-hearing the selfishness among the Moroi elite enraged Lissa.
She welcomed her escapes from these events whenever she could, anxious to run wild with Avery. Avery was always able to find people to hang out with and attend parties of a much different nature than Tatiana's. Stifling Court politics never came up at these parties, but there were still plenty of other things to drag Lissa's mood down.
In particular, Lissa felt her guilt, anger, and depression over me spiraling deeper and deeper. She'd seen enough of spirit's effects on her moods to recognize potential warning signs, though she hadn't been actively using spirit while on this trip. Regardless of the moods' cause, she still continued to do her best to seek distraction and drown her depression.
"Watch it," warned Avery one evening. She and Lissa were at a party the night before they had to fly back to the Academy. A lot of those who lived at Court had permanent housing, and this party was at the town house of some Szelsky who served as an aide on a committee Lissa didn't know.
Lissa didn't really know their host either, but that didn't matter, save that his parents were out of town.
"Watch what?" asked Lissa, staring around the sights. The town house had a courtyard out back, lit up by tiki torches and strings of twinkling lights.
There were drinks and food in full force, and some Moroi guy had a guitar out and was trying to impress girls with his musical skills-which were nonexistent. In fact, his music was so awful that he might have discovered a new way to kill Strigoi. He was cute enough, though, that his admirers didn't seem to care what he played.
"This," said Avery, pointing at Lissa's martini. "Are you keeping track of how many of those you're taking down?"
"Not from what I can tell," said Adrian. He was sprawled on a lounge chair nearby, a drink in his own hand.
Lissa felt a bit amateur compared to them. While Avery was still her wild and flirtatious self, she didn't have the crazed or stupid air of someone completely trashed. Lissa didn't know how much the other girl had been drinking, but it was presumably a lot since Avery always had a drink in hand. Likewise, Adrian never seemed to be without a beverage, the effects of which mostly mellowed him out. Lissa supposed they had a lot more experience than her. She'd gone soft over the years.
"I'm fine," lied Lissa, who was watching her surroundings spin a little and seriously contemplating joining some girls dancing on a table across the courtyard.
Avery's lips quirked into a smile, though her eyes showed a bit of worry. "Sure. Just don't get sick or anything. That kind of thing gets around, and the last thing we need is everyone knowing that the Dragomir girl can't hold her liquor. Your family has a fierce reputation to maintain. "
Lissa downed the drink. "Somehow, I doubt alcohol consumption is part of my family's illustrious ancestry. "
Avery pushed Adrian over and lay down next to him on the lounge chair. "Hey, you'd be surprised. In ten years, this group will be your peers on the council. And you'll be trying to pass some resolution, and they'll be like, ¡®Remember that time she got trashed and threw up at that party?'"
Lissa and Adrian both laughed at that. Lissa didn't think she was going to get sick, but like everything else, she would worry about it later. The bright point of all this was that drinking was helping numb the memories of what had happened earlier in the day. Tatiana had introduced her to her future guardians: a seasoned guy named Grant and the "young lady," who was named Serena. They had been nice enough, but their parallels to Dimitri and me had been overwhelming. Taking them on had seemed like a betrayal to us, yet Lissa had simply nodded and thanked Tatiana.
Later, Lissa had learned that Serena had originally been lined up to be the guardian for a girl she'd known her entire life. The girl wasn't royal, but sometimes, depending on guardian numbers, even non-royals got assigned gua
rdians-though never more than one. When positions for Lissa's protection opened up, however, Tatiana had pulled Serena from the job with her friend. Serena had smiled and told Lissa it didn't matter. Duty came first, she said, and she was happy to serve her. Yet Lissa felt bad, knowing it had to have been hard on both girls-and terribly unfair. But there it was again: an unfair balance of power with no one to really keep it in line.
Leaving that encounter, Lissa had cursed her own meekness. If she hadn't had the courage to follow me, she thought, she should have at least put her foot down and demanded that Tatiana give her my mother instead. Then Serena could have gone back to her friend, and there'd be one friendship still left intact in the world.
The martini simultaneously seemed to numb the pain and make her feel worse, which honestly made no sense to Lissa. Whatever, she thought.
And when she caught a glimpse of a server passing by, she waved him over to order more.
"Hey, can I-Ambrose?"
She stared in surprise at the guy standing before her. If there'd been a swimsuit calendar for hottest dhampir guys, this one would have been the cover model (aside from Dimitri-but then, I was biased). This guy's name was Ambrose, and she and I had met him on our trip there together. He had deeply tanned skin and well-formed muscles underneath his gray button-down shirt. He was a particular oddity at Court, a dhampir who'd rejected guardian service and performed all sorts of tasks here, like giving massages and-if rumor was true-having "romantic encounters" with the queen. That one still made me cringe, and I'd run into some pretty disgusting things in my life.
"Princess Dragomir," he said, flashing her one of his perfect white grins. "An unexpected surprise. "
"How have you been?" she asked, genuinely happy to see him.
"Good, good. I have the best job in the world, after all. And you?"
"Great," she replied.
Ambrose paused, eyeing her. He didn't drop that gorgeous grin, but Lissa could tell he didn't agree with her. She could see the disapproval in his face. Avery accusing her of drinking too much was one thing. But some pretty dhampir servant? Unacceptable. Lissa's demeanor grew cold, and she held out her glass.
"I need another martini," she said, her voice as haughty as that of any perfect royal.
He sensed the change in her, and his friendly smile turned to one of polite indifference. "Right away. " He gave her a small bow and headed off to the bar.
"Jeez," said Avery, watching admiringly as he walked away. "Why didn't you introduce us to your friend?"
"He's not my friend," snapped Lissa. "He's nobody. "
"Agreed," said Adrian, putting an arm around Avery. "Why look elsewhere when you've got the best right here?" If I hadn't known any better, I'd have sworn there was a hint of legitimate jealousy underneath his jovial tone. "Didn't I go out of my way to bring you to breakfast with my aunt?"
Avery gave him a lazy smile. "That's a good start. You've still got a ways to go to impress me, Ivashkov. " Her gaze drifted over Lissa's head and turned surprised. "Hey, Jailbait's here. "
Mia, with Jill in tow, came striding through the garden, indifferent to the shocked looks she received. The two of them were clearly out of place.
"Hey," said Mia when she reached Lissa's group. "My dad just got called away, and I have to go with him. I've got to give Jill back. "
"No problem," said Lissa automatically, though she clearly wasn't happy about Jill being there. Lissa still kept wondering if Christian had some special interest in her. "Everything okay?"
"Yeah, just business. "
Mia made her farewells to everyone and left the party as quickly as she'd come, rolling her eyes at the other royals' sneers and shock as she passed.
Lissa turned her attention to Jill, who had sat gingerly in a nearby chair and was staring around her in wonder. "How's it been? Did you have fun with Mia?"
Jill turned back to Lissa, face brightening. "Oh yeah. She's really great. She's done so much work with water. It's crazy! And she taught me a few fighting moves, too. I can throw a right hook. . . although not very hard. "
Ambrose returned then with Lissa's drink. He gave it to her wordlessly and softened a bit when he saw Jill. "You want anything?"
She shook her head. "No, thanks. "
Adrian was watching Jill carefully. "You okay here? Do you want me to take you back to guest housing?" Like before, his intentions weren't romantic in the least. He seemed to regard her as a little sister, which I thought was cute. I hadn't thought him capable of that kind of protective behavior.
She shook her head again. "It's okay. I don't want you to have to leave. . . unless. . . " Her expression grew worried. "Do you want me to go?"
"Nah," said Adrian. "It's nice to have someone responsible around in the midst of all this madness. You should get yourself some food, if you're hungry. "
"You're so motherly," teased Avery, echoing my thoughts.
For whatever reason, Lissa took Adrian's "responsible" comment personally, like he was directly slamming her. I didn't think that was the case at all, but she wasn't really thinking all that clearly. Deciding she wanted some food herself, she got up and wandered over to the table in the courtyard's garden that had trays of appetizers on it. Well, it had earlier. Now the table was being used by the dancing girls Lissa had noticed before. Someone had cleared space by moving all the trays of food to the ground. Lissa leaned over and picked up a mini sandwich, watching the girls and wondering how they could find any sort of beat in that royal guy's horrible music.
One of the girls spotted Lissa and grinned. She extended a hand. "Hey, come on up. "
Lissa had met her once but couldn't recall her name. Dancing suddenly seemed like a great idea. Lissa finished the sandwich and, drink in hand, allowed herself to be pulled up. This got a few cheers from people gathered around. Lissa discovered that the crappy music was irrelevant and found herself getting into it. Her and the other girls' moves varied from overtly sexual to mockeries of disco. It was all fun, and Lissa wondered if Avery would claim this would haunt her in ten years too.
After a while, she and the others actually attempted some synchronized moves. They started by swaying their arms in the air and then moved on to some chorus line kicks. Those kicks proved disastrous. A misstep-Lissa was wearing heels-suddenly sent her over the table's edge. She lost the drink and nearly collapsed before a pair of arms caught her and kept her upright. "My hero," she muttered. Then she got a good look at her savior's face. "Aaron?"
Lissa's ex-boyfriend-and the first guy she'd ever slept with-looked down at her with a smile and released her once he seemed certain she could stand. Blond-haired and blue-eyed, Aaron was handsome in a surfer kind of way. I couldn't help but wonder what would have happened if Mia had seen him. She, Aaron, and Lissa had once been involved in a triangle worthy of any soap opera.
"What are you doing here? We thought you disappeared," Lissa said. Aaron had left the Academy a few months ago.
"I'm going to school out in New Hampshire," he replied. "We're here visiting family. "
"Well, it's great to see you," said Lissa. Things hadn't ended well between them, but in her current state, she meant her words. She'd had enough booze to think it was great to see everyone at the party.
"You too," he said. "You look amazing. "
His words struck her more than she would have expected, probably because everyone else here had implied that she looked trashed and irresponsible. And breakup or no, she couldn't help but recall how attractive she'd once found him. Honestly, she still found him attractive. She just didn't love him anymore.
"You should stay in touch," she said. "Let us know what's going on. " For a moment, she wondered if she should have said that, in light of having a boyfriend. Then she dismissed her worries. There was nothing wrong with hanging out with other guys-particularly since Christian hadn't cared enough to come with her on this trip.
"I'd like that," Aaron said. Ther
e was something in his eyes she found pleasurably disconcerting. "I don't suppose, though, that I could get a goodbye kiss, seeing as I rescued you and all?"
The idea was preposterous-then, after a moment, Lissa laughed. What did it matter? Christian was the one she loved, and a kiss between friends would mean nothing. Looking up, she let Aaron lean down and cup her face. Their lips met, and there was no denying it: The kiss lasted a bit longer than a friendly one. When it ended, Lissa found herself smiling like a dazed schoolgirl-which, technically, she was.
"See you around," she said, heading back toward her friends.
Avery wore a chastising look, but it wasn't over Aaron and the kiss. "Are you crazy? You nearly broke your leg. You can't do that kind of thing. "
"You're supposed to be the fun one," pointed out Lissa. "It wasn't a big deal. "
"Fun isn't the same as stupid," Avery retorted, face serious. "You can't go do stupid shit like that. I think we should get you home. "
"I'm fine," said Lissa. She stubbornly looked away from Avery and instead focused on some guys who were doing shots of tequila. They were having some sort of competition-and half of them looked ready to pass out.
"Define ¡®fine,'" said Adrian wryly. Yet he looked concerned too.
"I'm fine," Lissa repeated. Her gaze snapped back to Avery. "I didn't get hurt at all. " She'd expected grief about Aaron and was surprised they hadn't given it to her-which made it even more surprising when it came from another source.
"You kissed that guy!" exclaimed Jill, leaning forward. Her face was aghast, and she displayed none of her usual reticence.
"It was nothing," said Lissa, who was irked to have Jill reprimanding her of all people. "Certainly none of your business. "
"But you're with Christian! How could you do that to him?"
"Relax, Jailbait," said Avery. "A drunken kiss is nothing compared to a drunken fall. God knows I've kissed plenty of guys drunk. "
"And yet, I remain unkissed tonight," mused Adrian, with a shake of his head.
"It doesn't matter. " Jill was really worked up. She'd grown to like and respect Christian. "You cheated on him. "
With those words, Jill might as well have practiced her right hook on Lissa. "I did not!" Lissa exclaimed. "Don't drag your crush on him into this and imagine things that aren't there. "
"I didn't imagine that kiss," said Jill, flushing.
"That kiss is the least of our worries," sighed Avery. "I'm serious-just let it go for now, you guys. We'll talk in the morning. "
"But-" began Jill.
"You heard her. Let it go," a new voice growled. Reed Lazar had appeared out of nowhere and was looming over Jill, face as hard and scary as ever.
Jill's eyes went wide. "I'm just telling the truth. . . " I had to admire her courage here, considering her normally timid nature.
"You're pissing everyone off," said Reed, leaning closer and clenching his fists. "And you're pissing me off. " I was pretty sure this was the most I'd ever heard him say. I tended to kind of think of him as a caveman, stringing three-word sentences together.
"Whoa. " Adrian leapt up and rushed to Jill's side. "You need to let this go. What, are you going to start a fight with some girl?"
Reed turned his glare on Adrian. "Stay out of this. "
"The hell I will! You're crazy. "
If anyone had asked me to make up a list of people most likely to risk a fight in defense of a lady's honor, Adrian Ivashkov would have been low on that list. Yet there he stood, face hard and hand sitting protectively on Jill's shoulder. I was in awe. And impressed.
"Reed," cried Avery. She too had risen and now stood on Jill's other side. "She didn't mean anything. Back off. "
The two siblings stood there, eyes locked in some kind of silent showdown. Avery wore the harshest look I'd ever seen on her, and at last, he glowered and stepped back. "Fine. Whatever. "
The group stared in amazement as he walked abruptly away. The music was so loud that only a few of the partygoers had overhead the argument.
They stopped and stared, and Avery looked embarrassed as she sank back in her chair. Adrian still stood by Jill. "What the hell was that?" Adrian demanded.
"I don't know," Avery admitted. "He gets weird and overprotective sometimes. " She gave Jill an apologetic smile. "I'm really sorry. "
Adrian shook his head. "I think it's time for us to go. "
Even in her drunken state, Lissa had to agree. The confrontation with Reed had shocked her into soberness, and she was suddenly uneasily evaluating her actions tonight. The glittering lights and fancy cocktails of the party had lost their charm. The drunken antics of the other royals seemed clumsy and stupid. She had a feeling she might regret this party tomorrow.
Once back in my own head, I felt fear set in. Okay. Something was very wrong with Lissa, and no one else seemed to notice it-well, not to the extent they should have. Adrian and Avery did seem concerned, but I had the feeling they were blaming her behavior on the drinking. Lissa was still reminding me a lot of how she'd been when we'd first returned to St. Vladimir's, when spirit had been seizing her and messing with her mind.
Except. . . I knew enough about myself now to realize that my anger and fixation on punishing Strigoi was being influenced by spirit's dark side too. That meant I was draining it away from her. It should have been leaving Lissa, not building up. So what was wrong with her? Where was this short-tempered, crazy, and jealous persona coming from? Was spirit's darkness simply growing in intensity so that it spread to both of us? Were we splitting it? "Rose?"
"Huh?" I glanced up from where I'd been staring blankly at the TV. Denis was looking down at me, his cell phone in his hand.
"Tamara had to work late. She's ready to go now, but. . . "
He nodded toward the window. The sun was almost down, the sky purple, with only a little orange on the horizon. Tamara worked within walking distance, and while there probably wasn't any real danger, I didn't want her out alone after sunset. I stood up. "Come on, we'll go get her. " To Lev and Artur I said, "You guys can stay here. "
Denis and I walked the half-mile to the small office where Tamara worked. She did assorted clerical tasks, like filing and copying, and there'd apparently been some project that kept her there late tonight. We met her at the door and walked back to the apartment without incident, talking animatedly about our hunting plans for the evening. When we reached Tamara's building, I heard a strange wailing across the street. We all turned, and Denis chuckled.
"Good God, it's that crazy woman again," I muttered.
Tamara didn't live in a bad part of town but, as in any city, there were homeless people and panhandlers. The woman we watched was almost as ancient as Yeva, and she regularly walked up and down the street, muttering to herself. Today, she lay on her back on the sidewalk, making strange noises while waving her limbs like a turtle.
"Is she hurt?" I asked.
"Nope. Just crazy," said Denis. He and Tamara turned to go inside, but some soft part of me couldn't abandon her. I sighed.
"I'll be right in. "
The street was quiet (aside from the old lady) and I cut across without fear of traffic. Reaching the woman, I held out my hand to help her out, trying not to think about how dirty hers was. Like Denis had said, she merely appeared to be in crazy mode today. She wasn't hurt; she'd apparently just decided to lie down. I shuddered. I tossed the word crazy around a lot when it came to Lissa and me, but this was truly crazy. I really, really hoped spirit never took us this far. The homeless lady looked surprised at the help but took my hand and began talking excitedly in Russian. When she tried to hug me in gratitude, I stepped back and held up my hands in the international "back off" signal.
She did indeed back off but continued chatting happily. She grabbed the sides of her long coat and held them out like a ball-room skirt and began spinning around and singing. I laughed, surprised that in my grim world, this would cheer me up.
I started to cross back over to Tamara's place.
The old woman stopped dancing and began talking happily to me again.
"Sorry, I have to go," I told her. It didn't seem to register.
Then she froze mid-sentence. Her expression gave me warning only half a millisecond before my nausea did. In one fluid motion, I spun around to face what was behind me, pulling my stake out as I moved. There was a Strigoi there, tall and imposing, having sneaked up while I was distracted.
Stupid, stupid. I'd refused to let Tamara walk home alone, but I'd never even considered danger right outside my "No. . . "
I wasn't sure if I said the word or thought it. It didn't matter. The only thing that mattered just then was what my eyes saw before me. Or, rather, what my eyes thought they saw. Because surely, surely, I had to be imagining this. It couldn't be real. Not after all this time.
Dimitri.
I knew him instantly, even though he'd. . . changed. I think in a crowd of a million people, I would have recognized him. The connection between us would allow nothing else. And after being deprived of him for so long, I drank in every feature. The dark, chin-length hair, worn loose tonight and curling slightly around his face. The familiar set of lips, quirked now in an amused yet chilling smile. He even wore the duster he always wore, the long leather coat that could have come straight out of a cowboy movie.
And then. . . there were the Strigoi features. His dark eyes-the eyes I loved-ringed in red. The pale, pale, death-white skin. In life, his complexion had been as tanned as mine, thanks to so much time outdoors. If he opened his mouth, I knew I'd see fangs.
My whole assessment took place in the blink of an eye. I'd reacted fast when I'd felt him-faster than he'd probably expected. I still had the element of surprise, my stake poised and ready. It was perfectly lined up with his heart. I could tell, then and there, that I could make the hit faster than he could defend. But. . .
The eyes. Oh God, the eyes.
Even with that sickening red ring around his pupils, his eyes still reminded me of the Dimitri I'd known. The look in his eyes-the soulless, malicious gleam-that was nothing like him. But there was just enough resemblance to stir my heart, to overwhelm my senses and feelings. My stake was ready. All I had to do was keep swinging to make the kill. I had momentum on my side. . .
But I couldn't. I just needed a few more seconds, a few more seconds to drink him in before I killed him. And that's when he spoke.
"Roza. " His voice had that same wonderful lowness, the same accent. . . it was all just colder. "You forgot my first lesson: Don't hesitate. "
I just barely saw his fist striking out toward my head. . . and then I saw nothing at all.