Hoist the Jolly Lucas

  by David J. Wighton

  Book #4 in the Wilizy Series

  Copyright 2014, David J. Wighton

  This e-book is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This e-book may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to your favorite retailer and purchase your own copy.

  Although this e-book might be sold at no cost to the reader at times, I retain ownership of the copyright and may elect to charge a small amount for its purchase at times.

  Thank you for respecting my copyright.

  Acknowledgements

  This book is dedicated to my wife, Dale, and to my other family members whose support and patience made it possible.

  Cover design by Jenny Anderson at WordPress.com

  Editing assistance from Michelle Scoville who sees typos that mere mortals would never find unaided.

  Wilizy Family Members as of September 2082

  • Doc and Granny (about 71 years old).

  • Hank (about 41) and Yolanda (about 37).

  • Wolf (17).

  • Yollie (16), TG (17), and Liset (2).

  •  Will (16) and Izzy (16).

  • Wizard (14) and Lucas (10).

  • Theo (9) and Mathias (8).

  • Reese (7), Winnie (6), Patella (2 months).

  • Stu McKenzie (42).

  Also

  • Zzyk (the Evil Gnome).

  • Rick (Zzyk's Executive Officer).

  • Rolf (Rick's assistant).

  • Ingrid (Head of the IOF's baby making business).

  • Igor (Manager in charge of DPS computers).

  • Mac (Stu's assistant).

  • Franklin Franklin (FF) (BC government man).

  • Bubba Franklin (Franklin's brother).

  • David Wighton (Mac's great-great-grandfather).

  This page is to help you if you get confused about who is who in the story. If that happens, click your way back to the Table of Contents and scroll back one page.

  Table of Contents

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  Chapter 25

  Chapter 26

  Chapter 27

  Chapter 28

  Chapter 29

  Chapter 30

  Chapter 31

  Chapter 32

  Chapter 33

  Chapter 34

  Chapter 35

  Chapter 36

  Chapter 37

  Chapter 38

  Chapter 39

  Chapter 40

  Chapter 41

  Chapter 42

  Chapter 43

  Chapter 44

  Chapter 45

  Other novels by David J. Wighton

  About the Author

  Chapter 1

  From Izzy's journals: Thursday, September 1, 2082, 11 p.m.

  That first Assassination Day evening, the family was milling around in the meadow next to the big old empty pioneer house. That wide clearing gave the best view of the sky and Will had promised us that we'd have a personal viewing of my surprise. I don't believe that anyone other than Will knew what the surprise was going to be. I had tried to worm some information out of Wolf earlier in the evening, since he and Wizard were in charge of starting the surprise at 11:00 p.m. in Alberta's five cities. I figured Wolf would know what it was; he said he didn't. All he knew was that he and Wizard had to be as high as possible in their portion of the sky over Alberta before sending the wireless Fire signal. Everything else was automated after that.

  We had actually been in the clearing for hours. The men had built a big bonfire, and that, and the big full moon, were giving us plenty of light in our narrow little valley. We had fat wieners and fluffy white marshmallows to roast, hot chocolate to drink, and many of us were dancing to the music from Wolf 's portable P.A. system. We had been enjoying a good old-fashioned barn dance without the barn.

  At 10:55, Will changed the music to Unchained Melody and he lead me into the middle of the clearing and we began to waltz. Just like we had danced on the WZBN promo show. But, I pulled Doc and Granny into the clearing with me, and Hank and Yolanda came too. TG and Yollie were soon dancing with Liset snuggled between them, her little arms hanging around each of their necks. Stu was waltzing with Winnie in his arms and the boys had stopped sword fighting with their wiener sticks and were wandering around looking at the sky.

  A huge BOOM made us all jump, and then we just stared at the sky as coloured lights streamed down amid mini-explosions from additional rockets launched into the sky. Everyone was responding with ooohs and aaahs and particularly sparkling bursts of colours brought spontaneous applause. Even Liset was clapping her hands, her eyes bugging out of her face; Winnie was telling Stu how she had seen some of these colours in California when Will was doing his research and how she had kept her promise not to tell anyone.

  Too soon, we heard two powerful explosions, followed shortly afterwards by two more, and I knew Will was telling me that this had been all for me. I felt something well up inside of me and I grabbed him tight and gave him my A#1 kiss – the one I had never dared to use before. Will must have been holding one back too, because I lost track of time after that. I remember him lifting me off the ground and slowly turning in circles while we were locked in an endless series of kisses. I was melting and shivering at the same time, if that were possible. I remember thinking that as soon as Will put me down, I was going to take him into the woods. Tonight was going to be the night.

  Then, I felt my toes touch the ground. I pulled my lips away from his, grabbed his hand and turned to sneak away. And ran smack into Hank and Yolanda. Doc and Granny were right behind us in case I had turned the other way. Before I could say anything, Will was answering Doc's questions about what chemicals were in the fireworks and how he had created the colours. Naturally Will agreed to help the men check the firing locations for unexploded shells. Couldn't have the boys hurting themselves, could they.

  Me . . . I was being hustled towards the compound with Granny holding onto one elbow and Yolanda steering me with the other. They were chattering about what chores had to be done tomorrow and what they would like me to do. I turned to look back at Will, but Yolanda turned me firmly back towards the compound and whispered softly in my ear. "Tonight is not going to be the night, Sweetie."

  Yolanda took me to her root cellar and parked me firmly on a wooden crate of some bottled fruit or vegetable. I was opening my mouth to give her a blast about meddling in my life when she sat down on her own crate and turned the kerosene lamp off.

  Back to the Table of Contents

  Chapter 2

  The Narrator: September 1, 2082.

  Nobody knows what Zzyk said or did during the evening hours of Assassination Day. However from events that followed, we may assume that Zzyk's thoughts about the re-appearance of the WZBN broadcasts in Alberta's air waves went something like this.

 
# # # # # # # #

  Naturally, one of my staff drew my attention to the announcements urging Albertans to watch the WZBN on the evening of September 1. The re-birth of the WZBN broadcasts so soon after the DPS had supposedly shut down all of the Wilizy's broadcast capabilities revealed that Rick's celebration of the death of the Wilizy movement was premature. Zurt had to be alive. If Zurt was alive, so was The Slut. And so were Ingrid's treacherous son Ivan and his daughter. Rick had failed me badly. So had Ingrid, but Rick had worked hard to convince me that his assassination plot had succeeded. Ingrid had been trying to warn me that Rick had been fooled.

  I had expected the worst and so I had sent the staff out of the command bunker well before the start of the Wilizy's last show at 10 p.m. Rick and Ingrid joined me in the command center – as I ordered – and sat in the chairs I had put out for them. We all stared at the screen without comment for the entire hour. I made a note of The Slut's challenge that I couldn't destroy their transmitter but didn't pay much attention to their plans for their upcoming shows since the new brain-bands would prevent any Albertan from viewing them. I also noted Zurt's use of rocketry to create the light show. There had been ample evidence that he had used missiles to destroy my planes. Now The Slut was bragging about his late entry into the rocket field with his tiny meaningless sparkles.

  The sexual acts that they engaged in at the end of the broadcast were difficult to watch. I closed my eyes instead and focused on listening to Rick's breathing as it accelerated during their despicable coupling. Biometric measures in the chair will confirm if I'm right about that breathing. I'll also check to see what controls Rick has on his brain band, if any. I suspect they'll need to be increased.

  The multiple repetitions of Ingrid's favorite words of condemnation – stupid, stupid people – caught me by surprise. I assumed that this was proof that her son was alive and that he had shared intimate details about his mother with the Wilizy. The Slut probably had inserted those words into the broadcast to taunt me. However Ingrid did react to hearing her words. Was she happy that her son was alive? Biometrics will reveal her true feelings.

  I noticed that Zurt had lost a tremendous amount of his behavioural conditioning. The clowning, the dancing, and the obvious sexual attraction to The Slut were all signs of deep moral weakness seeping through the brain-band safety barriers. I'll add Zurt's slide towards depravity to my strategic spreadsheet later. But for now, I suspect that the odds of capturing and putting him to productive work have shifted dramatically. If so, further plans for his capture can be abandoned. Annihilation had always been the easier strategy to execute. A single missile can achieve that quite easily. I've already identified a promising infant to replace him; her education can be accelerated.

  After Rick and Ingrid left, I examined their biometric reactions to the show. That prompted me to update a private file that I've been maintaining.

  # # # # # # # #

  • April 30, 2082: Somehow Zurt destroyed my pumping stations, somehow he eluded capture, and somehow he destroyed multiple troop transports parked at different bases around Alberta at the exact same time. Only B.C. would have the capability of doing all of that simultaneously. Rick was in B.C. on April 23 and 24. He said that he was trying to backtrack the crate that Zurt had sent to The Slut.

  • May 5, 2082: A para-gliding platoon was deceived into attacking a fake Wilizy camp and they were captured without a single soldier firing a shot. Platoon members said that they were surrounded by an estimated force of over 50 soldiers. Only B.C. could have put those numbers into the field so quickly. The commander of my forces willingly entered a copter and left the battlefield. Sources in B.C. report that he was in Surrey days afterwards. Rick was in B.C. only days before that defeat. He said that he had been talking with Ivan, but I have no way to confirm that.

  • August 25-27, 2082: Rick was in B.C. checking on their border security. Two days later, Rick tried to convince me that Ingrid's hairs had killed Zurt and The Slut.

  • August 30, 2082: After learning that he had been beaten by Zurt and The Slut, Rick watched a video of them having sex. His biometrics revealed increased breathing and an accelerated heart rate. How long has he been attracted to The Slut? Is that attraction why his decision-making has been so flawed? Rick is completely free from brain-band controls. Do I need to impose some? Or has he been fatally corrupted by a near-naked, gyrating, red-haired, white body? Some loyalty tests should produce the answer. Regardless, I will assess whether Rick's #2 is ready for promotion to #1.

  • August 30, 2082: Why would Ingrid's biometrics show relief that Ivan was still alive? How did Prudhoe's missile fail to kill him? I have long expected that Alaska might not be the steadfast allies that they have claimed to be. Is this the beginning of their treachery? I shall start a file on Ingrid as well.

  Back to the Table of Contents

  Chapter 3

  The Narrator: September 1.

  Once again, I must write a chapter without the benefit of written records. Based on what happened later, this kind of conversation must have taken place. But I can't tell you who exactly is speaking or even where in Alaska the two people would have been at the time. I'll identify them by rank.

  # # # # # # # #

  Subordinate: Sir, the WZBN is back up and running. Will and Izzy have to be alive.

  Commander: If so, Ivan has to be alive too. How?

  Subordinate: We're checking. It was definitely Ivan's voice talking to us and the copter was definitely destroyed. We are assuming that he managed to transfer to some other transport before the missile struck.

  Commander: A boat?

  Subordinate: Probably. Something that was inflatable, low slung, and non-metallic. The escape boat was fast enough to be far away by the time we had enough light to check the crash site visually.

  C: So an empty copter tried to avoid the missile. How could Ivan have managed that?

  S: We're assuming that he was able to rig up a wireless pilot of some kind before he landed at the genetics lab. He has the technical know-how to do that. However, we wonder if that simple copter could be automated.

  C: Could the Wilizy have employed a radar-proof aircraft?

  S: It's unlikely that they have the science to do that because Zzyk kept Will away from that knowledge. Moreover the specialized materials that such aircraft require haven't been manufactured for decades and second-hand radar-proof aircraft aren't on any of the underground markets in weaponry. We track such information closely. Ingrid has reported that any success that the Wilizy have had can be attributed to small copters and long-range weaponry.

  # # # # # # # #

  C: What's your department's assessment of Zzyk now?

  S: Zzyk has been beaten badly by the Wilizy three times. His science is old and he's not a good strategist. Blunt power doesn't work well against the subtlety that the Wilizy is employing.

  C: Will the Wilizy beat him?

  S: Not quickly with only copters and long-range weaponry. Zzyk will face an internal coup first.

  C: You mean in addition to our own?

  S: Yes. Rick will act soon. When he does, we can either make sure that Rick fails or that Zzyk eliminates him beforehand. We already have our people in the IOF's genetic and technical commands; plus we have the sleeper. When the time is right, we'll step into the IOF command structure without opposition. Six months to a year from now, perhaps.

  C: The Wilizy?

  S: They're a small group without any military training that we can determine. They've been lucky, but they're vulnerable now that Zzyk can find their lair. To smash them completely, Zzyk will ask us for help. We'll enter Alberta by invitation and remove both Zzyk and Rick after we destroy the Wilizy. The new brain-bands will keep the population under our control.

  C: How long before both Zzyk and the Wilizy are out of the picture?

  S: The eggheads are predicting a 50 percent likelihood that we'll control all of Alberta by the end of the year. That goes up to a 90
percent probability if Zzyk senses an imminent internal coup and calls on us for help.

  # # # # # # # #

  C: That boat bothers me. How could the Wilizy transport a boat all the way up to the Beaufort Sea? A boat from Prudhoe is much more likely. That suggests assistance from inside Prudhoe.

  S: Yes it does. We've already started a number of files.

  C: Do you believe that Zzyk or Rick might have stashed a boat up there?

  S: We've always known that Alberta would not remain steadfast allies but such treachery would be difficult to slip past Ingrid. She's been very close to Zzyk for a long time.

  C: Perhaps too long to remain loyal to us? We know that somebody saved her son's life. She'd have the contacts inside Prudhoe who could have provided a boat.

  S: Should I send a message to the sleeper?

  C: Yes. Somebody is going to betray us – I can smell it. Tell the sleeper to maintain a close watch on Ingrid and Igor. Rick too, as always.

  Back to the Table of Contents

  Chapter 4

  From Izzy's journals: Friday, September 2.

  I can't say that I was looking forward to our planning meeting today. Yolanda's comments to me last night in the root cellar totally trashed the good feelings I had after the success of Dead Man Walking. After she had finished yammering at me, I tried to explain all the pressure I was under – devising plans, fighting a deadly opponent, wanting to have sex with Will, and not expecting to live much longer. She kept saying Been there, done that. Yeah. Right. Yolanda's biggest stress in her life is trying to keep her house clean with five rowdy boys living in it. Somehow I'm supposed to believe that she went through what I'm going through?

  However Yolanda was right about my decision to have sex with Will being a mistake. I'll give her that one. I don't know what came over me; I knew that my pregnancy would cause the Wilizy some problems. So yah, I shouldn't have tried to sneak off with Will. Especially without any protection.

  I now have six foil-wrapped birth control packets. I only took them so that she'd get off my case. She said that they were part of her stash and she showed me where she kept the main supply in case I wanted more. They were at the back of a top shelf in the root cellar in a wooden box labeled Brussels sprout seeds, something all the boys in the family hate. I don't know why she'd need a box that size. Somehow I'm supposed to believe that a middle-aged, married woman with eight kids is going to have sex often enough to need all of those packets?