“Go away,” she called, unwilling to face him. “Just…leave me alone.”
“I have been trying to leave you alone.” Stavros’s voice was muffled by the door. “But I grew worried about you. It has been hours and I thought the effects of my blood must have worn off.”
“Don’t worry about me—I’m just fine,” she snapped. “If I get cold I’ll take a hot bath.”
“Please…” The deep voice was pleading now. “At least come to the door. At least let me see that I haven’t harmed you.”
“You’d feel it if you had,” she pointed out. “Any physical pain…you’d feel it.”
“I know…” His voice was so low now she had to strain to hear it. “But there are other ways a person can be hurt. Please, Charlotte…”
Charlie got up unsteadily, and wrapped the towel more firmly around herself. Lifting her chin, she marched to the door on legs that felt as brittle as old sticks. She took a deep breath, braced herself, and unlocked the door.
“Fine, here I am.” She probably looked a mess with her hair all rumpled and her eyes bloodshot, not to mentions she was dressed only in towels. Not that she cared.
Stavros didn’t look much better himself. His hair was wild, as though he’d been running both hands through it and his eyes were more red than blue.
“Charlotte…” For a moment he didn’t seem to know what to say. Then he dropped gracefully to his knees and bowed his head. “Forgive me,” he said hoarsely. “I have no excuse for what I did.”
At the sight of him kneeling before her, looking so abjectly miserable, Charlie’s heart throbbed. For a moment she wanted to reach out to him. Her hand was actually outstretched to touch his hair...
Then her dream came back to her and she remembered the fear in Missy’s eyes…and her own fear on the couch when it had seemed that he would bond her to him whether she wanted him to or not.
“Charlotte…” he whispered again when she didn’t answer. “Please…”
“Please what—forgive you?” she demanded. “For nearly raping me or for almost trapping me in a relationship I could never get out of?”
“I am sorry.” He raised his eyes to hers. “I should not have bitten you. I should have known it would make me want…more.”
“Well you can’t have more,” Charlie snapped. “You know how I feel about being bonded to you? To any Kindred? I’d as soon be turned into one of those freakish Joined Ones!”
He recoiled as though she’d slapped him.
“Surely you can’t compare bonding with that.”
“I don’t see a difference.” Charlie crossed her arms over her breasts protectively. “It’s a relationship you can never get free of—it’s a cage.”
“How can you say that?” His voice was low and rough. “How can you feel that way about a relationship so close and loving…a bonding that lasts a lifetime?”
Charlie shivered, thinking of Missy. Thinking of Momma and Daddy, always fighting, always shouting… “You cheating no good lousy bastard, go back to your little whore!”
“I wouldn’t have to find another woman if you’d put out once in awhile!”
“So I can catch the diseases you got from her? I don’t think so…”
They had fought and snapped and shouted for years until her Daddy finally filed for divorce. It had been a relief for everyone—especially Charlie and Missy. But then Missy started having the dreams. And everyone knew there was no getting out of it. After all, the Kindred didn’t do divorce.
She could still hear her sister crying… “He’s coming for me and I’ll never be able to get away from him….”
“Right,” she said flatly, snapping back to the present and glaring at the big Kindred, still kneeling before her. “Being tied to someone you can’t get free of…always bickering and arguing…hating the other person so much you want to die because death is the only way out. Oh yeah, that sounds freaking wonderful.”
“It’s not like that,” he pleaded. He stood gracefully and took her hand in his. “I don’t know what human bonds are like but between the Kindred…”
“Look, just leave me alone.” She pulled her hand away and pointed a shaking finger at him. “Don’t touch me again. As long as we’re here we still have to pretend to be a couple but if you so much as lay a finger on me…”
“I won’t.” He lifted both hands in a gesture of peace. “You know I won’t.”
“Good. Now leave me alone—I want to take a shower.”
Charlie slammed the door in his face and went to twist the shower controls violently. As the bathroom filled with clouds of hot steam, she buried her face in her hands and wept.
* * * * *
Stavros sank down on the other side of the fresher door, his legs too weak to hold him. Over the sound of the water running, he could hear Charlotte’s broken sobbing. He wanted in the worst way to go to her, to hold her and comfort her, but he couldn’t. He was the reason she was crying in the first place.
She hates me. Gods, she really hates me. And I can’t blame her one Goddessdamn bit. After what I did…
But she almost seemed more upset about the near bonding than she had about the way he’d almost taken her against her will.
Almost, hell, he told himself angrily. You were almost inside her before she made you see reason and you pulled out. You acted like a fucking animal—no wonder she can’t stand the sight of you now. No wonder she hates you.
He hated himself, too. Especially now that he was beginning to understand how he really felt about Charlotte.
Admit it, whispered a little voice in his head. You’re falling in love with her. You can’t help yourself—she’s all you’ve ever wanted in a female and even though she’s out of reach you can’t stop wanting her. You can’t stop…you’ll never stop.
Stav closed his eyes in agony. It was true. All of it was true. H wanted her—wanted her forever—and he couldn’t have her. He had heard a saying on Earth—“The truth will set you free.” Well, now he knew the truth about himself—the secret hiding in his heart. He loved Charlotte but knowing it did him no good and he wasn’t free at all. He would never be free of this hopeless love.
Never be free.
Chapter Twenty-six
“So…are the two of you settled comfortably on the truth-saying couch?”
Nar’sa looked at them innocently, clearly unaware of what was really going on between them.
“Yes, we’re fine,” Charlie said.
She sat stiffly on the round, furry red couch, her back rigidly erect, trying to keep her distance from the big Kindred who sat beside her. To his credit, Stavros sat straight as well, keeping to his side and being careful not to touch her.
“And did you fulfill the demands of the dream that came to Charlotte?” Ta’no asked.
“We did,” Stavros said simply. “In every way.”
“Well…” Nar’sa looked as if she wished she could have the juicy details but Charlie wasn’t saying a damn thing. Let their Hossan councilors imagine what they wanted—Charlie’s lips were sealed. She was trying not to even think of the time she and Stavros had spent together, let alone talk about it.
“I must say, for mates who have participated in erotic activities so lately, you do not appear very affectionate towards each other.” Ta’no frowned at them.
Stavros cleared his throat.
“We are…tired. The erotic ‘homework’ you assigned us was most taxing.”
“Is this true?” Nar’sa looked at Charlie, frowning.
“I’m completely worn out,” Charlie said, truthfully. Of course, she was worn out from crying and hating herself and being angry at Stavros and missing her sister all over again but Nar’sa hadn’t asked about that.
“Well…” At last the female Hossan shrugged. “I suppose since you have done as we asked, you must be promoted to the Circle of Oneness, no matter how listless you appear.”
“This is true, my love.” Ta’no motioned to them. “Rise and accompany us. Yo
u shall be promoted today.”
Charlie felt a sense of relief. Finally…finally they were getting into the inner circle. Now they would have access to the Heart. Tonight they could sneak in, grab it, and be flying out of here in their ship before anyone was the wiser. Then the Kindred could neutralize the threat of the Enhanced Ones and she could go home, back to Earth and forget about Stavros and the rest of his kind forever.
And all that for the simple price of practically selling your soul to the enemy. Or at least giving your body, whispered the snarky voice in her head. Hope it was worth it, Charlie!
Trying to ignore the voice, she and Stavros followed Nar’sa and Ta’no to the crimson door edged in brilliant white lights which marked the entrance to the Circle of Oneness.
“Now then,” Nar’sa said, turning to them. “The triple scan. Which of you will go first?”
“I will,” Stavros said, coming forward before Charlie could say a word. She knew what he was doing—going first in case there was some kind of hidden trap or pain involved, like the way the Joined One had burned her hand on the scanner to the Circle of Discovery. He was trying to protect her, even now that she had told him she wanted nothing else to do with him. The knowledge made her mad. Why did he have to be so damn noble and protective when she just wanted to hate him?
“I’ll do it—I’ll go first,” she snapped, striding in front of him and holding out her hand. “Do I just press the door panel like before?”
“Yes, and then present your eye to the scanner.” Nar’sa was tapping in a sequence into the silver panel. She finished and stepped back. “Go on.”
Bracing herself for any possible pain, Charlie slapped her hand to the silver panel and watched as it was outlined in brilliant white light. Then she looked bravely into the scanner, focusing on the red dot as Nar’sa instructed.
“Very good,” the female Hossan said, nodding at her. “And now if you will step through the door and into the Circle of Oneness, the third scan can begin.”
“Fine.” Determined to show no fear, Charlie went striding through before the red panel of the door was even all the way open. Her forward momentum carried her over the threshold and into a hallway filled with golden-pink light…
And directly into the path of the Joined One.
“Oh my God!” Charlie reeled back from the nightmare of two faces melting into one. She would have fallen but the Joined One shot out a hand and caught her wrist before she could.
“So…Charlotte…it surprises us greatly to see that you and your mate are being promoted.” It was Ye’ha’Na’ho, she saw at once—the head Joined One. The one that doesn’t like us, she thought grimly.
Aloud she said, “Let go of me!” and tried to pull away.
But the hideous figure’s grasp was much stronger than the long, transparent fingers filled with pink and turquoise veins would have led her to believe.
“We think not, child—for such you are to us. First you must be scanned to be assured of your worthiness to enter the final holy circle.”
“What are you talking about? Can’t you scan me without touching me?” The Joined One’s cool, clammy fingers on her arm filled Charlie with revulsion.
“Let go of her! Don’t touch my mate!” Stavros’s voice was a low growl but when Charlie turned her head, she saw he was still on the other side of the doorway. His eyes were burning with protective rage but it looked like he was pressing against some sort of invisible barrier—one he couldn’t get through no matter how hard he pushed.
“You have not been scanned yet,” Ta’no told him. “You cannot enter until you are.”
“Scan me then,” he growled. “But in the meantime, leave Charlotte alone!”
“After the third scan we will release her.” The Joined One hummed tranquilly and all four of its weird, glowing eyes closed. “If you simply hold still, it will take less time,” the female face murmured to her.
“I don’t want to hold still. I don’t want you to touch me,” she protested but the creature’s grip was unbreakable. At last she had to settle for standing as far from it as she could while it held her wrist. What the hell did it think it was doing? Was it trying to read her mind? And if so, what might it find? Charlie wondered uncomfortably if it could tell her true intentions for being here. And what would the punishment be for trying to steal the most sacred and holy artifact in the entire place?
No, don’t think about it! she told herself quickly. Don’t! What if it can read minds? Think of something else, quick! Mary had a little lamb, little lamb, little lamb…
“Ah-ha!” All four of the Joined One’s eyes flew open suddenly and it pointed an accusing finger at her. “Now we know.”
“Know what?” Charlie asked nervously. Stavros was still trapped on the other side of the invisible barrier that separated him from the inner circle. And neither Nar’sa nor Ta’no was making any effort to get him scanned so he could come in.
“We know what you are hiding!” The Joined One, Ye’ha’Na’ho, glared at her with both faces and all four eyes. “We know your secret sin.”
“What? What are you talking about?” Charlie demanded uneasily. “What could you possibly know just by grabbing my wrist?”
“We know that you…” Ye’ha’Na’ho drew itself up to its full height and scowled down at her. “Have recently spoken of your past.”
“What?” At first it didn’t make any sense—then Charlie felt a wave of relief wash over her. “Seriously, you’re upset because I talked about my past?” They must mean when she was telling Stavros why she didn’t want to let him taste her. Just the memory made her blush but she would much rather the Joined Ones know about that than suspect her as a spy.
“You spoke of the past,” the male face thundered, getting red and angry. “In a place where we deny our pasts…we bury them and move forward.”
“We live in the present and look to the future,” the female face said, frowning. “And for the crime of breaking our laws, you must be punished.”
“Punished? Punished how?” Charlie demanded, beginning to feel nervous all over again. Behind the invisible barrier, Stavros was emitting a low, angry growl. His fangs were fully extended, their tips as sharp as knives.
“You may have your choice,” the female face said benevolently. “It is only fair. Taste the pain of the fire whip…”
“Or enter the Temple of Regrets,” the male face said.
“The Temple of Regrets? What’s that and what does it do to you?” Charlie asked. Whatever it was, she doubted it could be worse than the “fire whip.”
“It is the place where your darkest memories come to life.” The eyes of the female face glinted fiercely, like sunlight flashing off quartz. “It is a punishment reserved for those who cannot forget their pasts—they are condemned to relive them.”
“Your worst memories?” Charlie put a hand to her throat. “You mean…you have to watch them happen over and over again?”
“Just once. But you do not just watch—you will relive the experience.” A cruel smiled played around the male’ face’s thin lips. “So what do you say, Charlotte? Will you take punishment by fire whip or will you enter the Temple of Regrets?”
Charlie didn’t even have to think about it.
“I’ll take the whip.”
Stavros watched in agony as the Joined One pulled out a short, stubby black handle from the fold of its black robes and made a slashing motion in the air. At once three long tongues of flame sprouted from the handle and burst into crackling, sizzling life with a smell like burnt ozone.
“Stop it—stop!” he demanded. “Fucking let her go, now!” He pushed uselessly against the invisible barrier as the Joined One prepared to whip Charlotte. It was like pushing against a granite wall—one that was invisible and intangible but there just the same.
“You must wait until the Joined One is finished,” Nar’sa said, tranquilly. “Then we may continue with your scanning process and let you into the Circle of Oneness to be with her
.”
“You let me in now!” Stavros demanded. Without waiting for an answer, he slapped his palm to the silver door panel. A burning jolt went through him, as though he’d pressed his hand to a bolt of lightning. The force of it knocked him backwards and for a moment he was stunned.
When he came to, shaking his head to try and rid himself of the buzzing in his ears, he saw an awful sight. Charlotte was leaning face first against the wall in the other corridor, her white robes raised to show her bare bottom and the Joined One was standing behind her, about to swing the fiery whip.
“Wait! No!” He stumbled to his feet and ran to the barrier. “Don’t whip her!” he begged, trying to get the Joined One’s attention. “Do it to me—whip me instead!”
The huge, misshapen head turned and both faces focused on him for a moment. “Oh, we will, Stavros. But only if our scan shows that you deserve it. First we must attend to Charlotte.”
“At least let me be with her!” he pleaded desperately. If he could just get through the barrier—if he could just touch her—he could absorb most of her pain, he was sure of it. But with the barrier between them, he didn’t know if he’d be able to bear any of her burden at all—let alone take all of it as he wanted to.
“I am afraid not, my dear Stavros,” the male face sneered. “You have not yet been scanned.”
“I swear to the Goddess, if you touch her—” he snarled, but the whip was already in motion. There was a sizzling whoosh and then a flat crack as all three of the long fiery tongues landed on Charlotte’s bare, quivering backside.
She jumped and bit her lip fiercely as though trying to hold back a cry and Stavros felt a whisper of pain go through her. But only a whisper, like a shout heard in another room—the barrier was blocking it somehow. Desperately, he reached out to her with his mind, trying to absorb the pain of the cruel whip but he felt blocked, as though he was trying to reach through a brick wall.