The shower guest
It had just started to rain as George Stevens reached his hotel. He laughed as he brushed some of the cold droplets from his hair. A boyish grin spread across his flushed face as he ambled across the foyer, hands in his pockets. George was mildly intoxicated and well fed. He was happy.
Owing to the late hour, the normally bustling space was quiet. The night clerk looked bemused as she handed George his room card. While he waited for a lift, George studied the irregular patterns of water flowing sensuously down the huge front windows of the hotel. It was erotic but also soothing. Soon he could hear his own breathing, steady and strong. George relaxed. Then he fought the urge to lay down on one of the Chesterfield lounges nearby. It would be easy to get comfortable and just gaze at the water. The lift arrived and broke the spell. Grog must be getting to me, he thought, shaking his head.
As he entered the lift George chuckled to himself. It had been a great night; terrific food, boisterous company and lots of good wine. The stories had been outrageous. Some of them had been outright lies, but they had been great lies. George snorted and chuckled again, but his eyelids sagged as the lift rose. Now he really was ready for a good sleep.
Once inside his suite George threw his shoes and clothing in all directions. Some items landed on the divan but most ended up on the floor. George stood in front of the long mirror and patted his naked belly contentedly. Then he belched. It felt good to be free of clothes and shoes after such a long day. He wandered into the en-suite and placed his precious dentures safely in a glass. Somehow, a small whiskey with ice seemed to be a good idea. But it wasn’t long before two miniature bottles stood empty on the bar beside a chunky glass. George was on autopilot when he stretched out in the king-size bed. His head sank into the large, soft pillows. The peaty liquor quickly worked its magic and George was soon fast asleep.
When he woke up, in the morning, George’s mouth was bone dry. It also seemed like somebody was drilling a well right between his eyes. George sighed; a good night out was not without penalties. With a determined effort he got up and took his bearings. The lights had been on all night. A packet of Panadol stood on the bar near the derelict scotch bottles. But relief was at hand. The bar fridge held two cans of cola: two black Aspros to wash down the rapid acting Panadol. He swiftly administered the hangover cure and waited.
George was starting to feel a little less seedy when he stepped into the huge shower recess. He really enjoyed his morning shower, especially when he was hung over. The warm water played soothingly on the top of his pounding head, and then it ran down his shoulders and back. It was bliss. He started to rally. He kept his eyes closed. It helped ease his headache.
Ten minutes later, George reluctantly turned off the water and reached for his towel. His eyes were now wide open. As he dried himself, a slight movement registered in his peripheral vision. Just water running down the tiles, he thought. But then it happened again. He blinked and then he stared. His eyes widened and widened as the steamy mist cleared. There was a naked woman standing in the corner of the shower recess. She was beautiful. George was stumped. Then he felt his face glowing red.
‘Do you know Leo? Have you seen him?’ It was a melodious voice with perfect diction. George tried to speak but no sound escaped his lips. Where had she come from?
“Have you seen Leo? She asked again.
George just gulped like a freshly landed trout. Then he flushed all over again as he realized that he was stark naked in front of a woman who he did not know. Swiftly one hand flew down to his crotch and the other covered his chest. But the lady seemed unconcerned.
‘Who are you? How did you get in here?’ George stammered.
‘I am looking for Leo. He’s my husband.’
‘What? Look here, I haven’t seen anyone. How did you get into my room? Where are your clothes?’’
The woman ignored the questions and moved towards George. Instinctively he shuffled back, wanting to avoid a clash of bodies. Nude bodies that were not acquainted. But she seemed to pass right through him. George grabbed the towel rail for support. A chill ran down his spine as he struggled to comprehend what had just happened. She’s a ghost.
George leaned against the doorway. He hadn’t believed in ghosts, at least, not until now. The woman made a circuit of the main room. She sighed and went to the window. The pale morning light filtered through the half-open blinds and made her entire form opaque. George was transfixed. Then she turned back towards him and floated across the room. George’s insides turned to jelly. He was scared, very scared. However, his feet seemed to be nailed to the floor. He just could not move.
‘Leo isn’t here,’ she exclaimed. Then, for the first time, the apparition appeared to notice the effect she was having. ‘Don’t be afraid. I am not here to harm you. I just want to find Leo.’
She stood close to George. It was as though she was scanning his face. Despite her assurances, George was on the verge of panic but he simply couldn’t look away.
‘You look a bit like Leo, but he is much younger’.
‘Oh, thanks a lot,’ George snapped, then instantly regretted his tone. ‘Look, I don’t want to make you angry but I don’t know where Leo is…I haven’t seen him.’
The lady continued to study George’s face.
‘Do you have a mark, on your bottom?’
‘Um, yes, as a matter of fact I do. It’s a birthmark. Mum always said it was a fairy’s strawberry’.
Before he could make a move to stop her, she spun George around like a toy to examine his behind.
‘Oh, my goodness, Leo has one just like it. You must be related. What’s your name?’
‘It’s George. George Stevens.’
George’s dignity was now in tatters. He had been easily manhandled by a naked ghost. Worst of all, she was a female ghost. In the circumstances, the fact that he was also naked, in front of a stranger, did not seem to count for all that much. Suddenly, there was a tremendous banging on the door. George shook all over. What now? He asked himself. Then a large handsome man with curly hair entered the room. George could not help noticing that he had passed straight through the door.
‘There you are you bastard! I’m sick and tired of your silly games.’ Snorted the woman.
‘Why darling I’ve been looking everywhere for you.’
‘What do you mean? I have been right here. George you tell him.’
‘That’s right. She’s been here with me for quite a while. She was looking for you.’
‘Oh yes and why are you both naked?’
George immediately regretted playing the part of her champion. He began to explain but she interrupted.
‘Look here Leo; George was just taking a shower. I got out of bed, couldn’t find you and walked in on him by mistake. You know I always sleep in the nude. The whole thing is perfectly innocent. By the way you two are related. Look at his bum. His name is Stevens.’
‘Is this true George?’ George decided it was better to nod his agreement. Speech had become dangerous. Leo smiled and walked behind him. George felt nervous. ‘Hmm. No doubt about it. I’ll have to check out the family tree. Give me your full details George.’
Stunned, George complied.
‘Okay, I believe you darling. George is family after all. But darling you have somehow come to the wrong hotel. We are down the street at the Windsor. This is not the Windsor. Do you think you may have been sleepwalking?’
‘I didn’t know that we could sleepwalk? Maybe I was? Oh, now I’m not sure.’
‘Well you’ve certainly spooked poor old George. Whatever must he be thinking? Are you okay George?’
George was not sure. Now he was starkers in front of two strangers. Both of them were ghosts. They lived at the Windsor, which was nice. They are not going to harm me. That’s good. Perhaps, if I…
But George never got to finish his assessment of the situation. Leo gestured and George fell unconscious into his arms. When he woke up his mouth was bone dry and the room was
empty. All that rich food, I had too much to drink. Where is everyone? It was probably just a nightmare? George shook his head, sighed and got up. A packet of Panadol stood on the bar near two derelict scotch bottles. Relief was at hand. The bar fridge held two cans of cola: two black Aspros to wash down the rapid acting Panadol. George took his medicine and walked to the en-suite.
George was already starting to feel less seedy as he stepped into the shower recess. Soon the warm water was playing soothingly on the top of his pounding head. It was bliss. Suddenly, he opened his eyes with a start and looked at the corner. There was nothing there. Why am I looking at the corner of the shower recess? Ten minutes later, George turned off the water and reached for his towel. He was late.
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