how youfeel. I----"
"Get out!" Tish yelled, in a furious tone. "Look what you're doing!Great heavens, don't you see what you've done? That was a potatoplant."
We tried to get out, although I could see nothing but a few weeds, butshe yelled at us every moment and at last I gave it up.
"I'd rather stay here, Tish," I said, "if you don't mind. I can keep thedogs away, and along in the autumn, when it's safe to move, you can takeme home, or put me in a can, along with the other garden stuff."
Here Tish fired a brick at Hannah's basket, but struck her in the kneecap instead, and down she went on what Tish said was six egg plants. Inthe resulting conversation I escaped, and went up to Tish's sittingroom.
Tish followed us soon after, and jerked the window shades to the top.
"There's nothing like getting close to nature," she said. "I feel like adifferent woman, after an hour or so of the soil."
She then took Hannah's basket and placed it on the window-silloverlooking the vacant lot, explaining that she used its contents tofling at dogs, cats and birds below.
"It makes a little extra work for Hannah," she commented. "But it'smaking a new woman of her. It would be good for you, too, Lizzie.There's nothing like bending over to reduce the abdomen."
But Aggie, having come to mourn, proceeded to do it.
"To think," she said, "that if they had only made it a day later, dearCharlie would have been exempt. It's too tragic, Tish."
"I don't know what you are talking about," said Tish in a cold tone. "Hedoes not have to register. He was born at seven in the morning, Junefifth."
"In the evening, Tish," said Aggie gently. "I was there, you know, and Iremember----"
Tish gave her a terrible look.
"Of course you would know," she observed, icily. "But as I was in theroom, and recall distinctly going out and telling old Amanda, the cook,about breakfast----"
"Supper," said Aggie firmly. "You were excited, naturally. But I was inthe hall when you came out, and I was expecting my first gentlemancaller, which no girl ever forgets, Tish. I remember that Amanda washooking my dress, which was very tight, because we had waist lines inthose days and I wanted----"
"Aggie," Tish thundered, "he was born early in the morning of Junefifth. He will be thirty-two years of age early in the morning ofRegistration day. And if he tries to register I shall be on hand withthe facts."
Well, whether she was right or not, she was convinced that she was, andit is useless to argue with her under those circumstances. Luckily sheheard a dog in the lot just then, and threw down a broken bottle andsome bricks at him, and the woman in the apartment below raised a windowand threatened to report her to the Humane Society. But, as usual, Tishwas more than her equal.
"Come right up, then," she said. "Because I am a member of the HumaneSociety and have been for twenty years. I consider throwing bricks atthat dog as patriotic a duty as killing a German, any day."
Here, by accident, the basket slid off the window-sill, and Tish closedthe window violently.
"It hit her on the head," she said, in what I fear was an exultant tone."I wouldn't have done it on purpose, but I guess it's no sin to bethankful."
Because the incident I am about to relate concerns not only RegistrationDay, but also Mr. Culver and the secret in the barn, I have been sometime in getting to it. And if, in so doing, I have reflected at any timeeither on Tish's patriotism or her strict veracity, I am sorry. No onewho knows Tish can doubt either.
In spite of Aggie, in spite of Charlie Sands, who protested violentlythat he distinctly remembered being born in the evening, because he hadyelled all the ensuing night and no one had had a wink of sleep--inspite of all this, Tish remained firm in her conviction that 7 A. M. onRegistration Day, when the precincts opened, would find him too old toregister.
On the surface the days that followed passed uneventfully. Tish sewedand knitted, and once each day stood Aggie and myself on the outskirtsof her garden and pointed out things which she said would be green corn,and tomatoes and peppers and so on. But there was a set look about herface, to those of us who knew and loved her. She had moments ofabstraction, too, and during one of them weeded out an entire row ofspring onions, according to Hannah.
On the third of June I went into the jeweller's to have my watchregulated, and found Tish at the counter. She muttered something about amain spring and went out, leaving me staring after her. I am no idiot,however, although not Tish's mental equal by any means, and I saw thatshe had been looking at gentlemen's gold watches.
I had a terrible thought that she intended trying to purchase CharlieSands by a gift. But I might have known her high integrity. She wouldnot stoop to a bribe. And, as a matter of fact, happening to stop atthe Ostermaiers' that evening to show Mrs. Ostermaier how to purl, Ifound that dear Tish, remembering the anniversary of his first sermon tous, had presented Mr. Ostermaier with a handsome watch.
It was on the fourth of June that I had another visit from CharlieSands. He is usually a most amiable young man, but on that occasion hecame in glowering savagely, and on sitting down on Aggie's knitting,which was on steel needles, he flung it across the room, and had tospend quite a little time apologizing.
"The truth is," he said, "I'm so blooming upset that I'm not myself. Letme put these needles back, won't you? Or do they belong in someparticular place?"
"They do," Aggie retorted grimly. "And for a young man who will bethirty-two tomorrow morning----"
"Evening," he corrected her, with a sort of groan. "I see she's got youtoo. Look here," he went on, "I'm in trouble, and I'm blessed if I seemy way out. I want to register tomorrow. I may not be drawn, because I'man unlucky devil and always was. But--I want to do my bit."
"Well," I observed, tartly. "I guess no one can prevent you. Go and doit, and say nothing."
"Not at all," he replied, getting up and striding up and down the room."Not a bit of it. I grant you it looks simple. Wouldn't any one in hissenses think that a young and able-bodied man could go and put his namedown as being willing to serve his country? Why, she herself--she'scrazy to go. I'd like to bet a hat she'll get there before long, too,and into the front trenches."
"Oh, no!" Aggie wailed suddenly.
"But not I," went on Charlie Sands fiercely. "Not I. How she ever gotaround that old fool Ostermaier I don't know. But she has. He'sappointed her an assistant registrar in his precinct, which is mine. Andshe'll swear until she's black in the face that I'm over age."
"Can't you have the place opened before seven in the morning?" Isuggested.
"I've been to him, but he says the law is seven o'clock. Besides," headded bitterly, "she knows me, and as like as not she'll sleep there, tobe on hand to forestall me."
As I look back, I am convinced that a desire to do his bit, as he termedit, was only a part of his anger that evening. The rest was the feelingthat Tish's superior acumen had foiled him. He had a truly masculinehatred of being thwarted by a woman, even by a beloved aunt.
"Well," he said at last, picking up his hat. "I'll be off." He went tothe door, but turned back and glowered at us both, although I am sure wehad done nothing whatever. "But mark my words, and remind her of themthe day after tomorrow. This thing's not over yet. She's pretty devilishclever"--(I regret to record this word, but he was greatlyexcited)--"but she hasn't all the brains in the family."
For a day that was to contain so much, however, the fifth of Junestarted quietly enough. We telephoned Hannah, and she reported that Tishhad left the house at five-thirty, although obliged to go only one blockto the engine house which was her destination.
So far as I can learn, for Tish is very uncommunicative about the entirematter, the morning passed quietly enough. She had taken the precautionof having her folding card table and two pillows sent to the enginehouse, and when Aggie and I arrived at midday she was seatedcomfortably, with her hat hung on a lamp of the fire truck. When wearrived she was asking the sexton of the Methodist Church, whom she hasknown for thirty years, if he
had lost a leg or an arm.
Aggie had brought a basket with some luncheon for her, and she placed iton the truck. But there was an alarm of fire soon after, and the thingwent out in a rush with the lunch and also with Tish's hat.
Tish was furiously angry. Indeed, I have since thought that much of whatfollowed was due to the loss of the luncheon, which the firemen declaredthey had not seen, although Aggie was positive she saw one of themeating one of the doughnuts that afternoon behind a newspaper.
But, worst of all, Tish's hat was missing. It reappeared later, however,but was brought in by the engine house dog, after having been run overby the Chief's machine, two engines and a ladder truck.
As I say, that was part of her irritation, but what really upset her wasthe number of married men. More than once, as she grew excited, I heardher say:
"Married? How many wives?"
When of course she meant how many children.
She had registered twenty-four married men and two single ones by oneo'clock, and she was looking very discouraged. But at one o'clock theclerk from the shoe store at the corner came in, and said he haddependent on him a wife, four children, a mother-in-law, a sister-in-lawand his sister-in-law's husband.
"Of course," Tish said bitterly, "you claim exemption."
"Me?" he said. "Me, Miss Carberry? My God, no."
Well, about two o'clock Charlie Sands came in. Tish saw him the momenthe entered the door, and stopped work to watch him. But he made noattempt to register. He said he was doing a column of slackers for thenext morning's paper.
"There's aren't many," he said, "but of course there are some. Thelicense court is the place to nail them."
"Do you mean to tell me," Tish demanded, "that there are traitors inthis country who are getting married _today_?"
"There are," said Charlie Sands, sitting down on the fire truck. "Evenso, beloved aunt. They are getting married so they can claim exemptionbecause of a dependent wife. And I'll bet the orphan asylums are full offellows trying to get ready-made families."
Tish is a composed and self-restrained woman, but she spoke sodistinctly of how she felt about such conduct that Charlie Murray, ourgrocer's assistant, who has four children, did not so much as mentionthem when she made out his card.
"Of course," Charlie Sands observed, "I don't want to dictate to you,because you're doing all that can be expected of you now. But if someone would go to the license court and tell those fellows a bit ofwholesome truth, it might be valuable."
"You do it, Lizzie," Tish said.
"I? I never made a speech in my life, Tish Carberry, and you know it."
"And I never before tried to get the truth from an idiot who says he istwenty-eight and has a daughter of eighteen! See here," Tish said to aman in front of her, waving her pen and throwing a circle of ink about."I'll have you know that I represent the government today, and if youthink you are being funny, you are not."
Well, it turned out that he had married a widow with a child, but had acork leg anyhow, so it made no difference. But Tish's mind was not onher work. However, she was undecided until Charlie Sands said:
"By the way, I saw your friend Culver among the Cupid-chasers today. Andthis is his district. You'd better round him up."
"Culver!" Tish said. "Do you mean that--Lizzie, where's my hat?"
Well, we had to recover it again from the engine house dog, whom wefound burying it in the back yard. Tish's mind, however, was far away,and she merely brushed it absently with her hand and stuck it on herhead. Then she turned to Charlie Sands.
"I'm going to the license court," she said, between clenched teeth. "AndI am going to show that young fool that he is not going to hide behindany petticoats today."
"It's his privilege to get married if he wants to."
"When I finish with him," said Tish, grimly, "he won't want to."
All the way to the court house Tish's lips were moving, and I knew shewas rehearsing what she meant to say. I think that even then her shrewdand active mind had some foreboding of what was to come, for she calledback unexpectedly to Aggie:
"Look in the right-hand pocket and see if there is a box of tacksthere."
"Tacks?" said Aggie. "Why, what in the world----"
"I had tacks to nail up flags this morning. Well?"
"They are here, Tish, but no hammer."
"I shan't need a hammer," Tish replied, cryptically.
I am afraid I had expected Tish to lead the way into the license courtand break out into patriotic fury. But how little, after all, I knewher! Already in that wonderful brain of hers was seething the plot whichwas so to alter certain lives, and was to leave an officer of thelaw--but that comes later on.
Mr. Culver was at the desk. Just as we arrived, a clerk handed him apaper, and he walked across the room to an ice-water cooler and took adrink.
"The slacker!" said Tish, from clenched teeth. "The coward! Thepoltroon! The----"
At that moment Mr. Culver, with a paper cup in his hand, saw us andstared at us fixedly. The next moment he had whipped off his hat, andwas coming toward us.
"Well!" he said, as he came up to us, "so it really did happen!"
Tish took a deep breath, to begin on him, but he went on blithely:
"You see, when I got back home that day, I felt it hadn't really beentrue. I had _not_ gone rabbit-shooting, and found three ladieshalf-buried in a haystack. And of course I had not driven an automobilealong a creek bed and through the old swimming hole, with my own gunlevelled at my back."
Tish took another breath and opened her mouth.
"Then, the other day," he went on, smiling cheerfully, "I thought I hadhad a return of the hallucination, because I fancied I saw you all on awagon. But the next moment the wagon was driving on, and you werenowhere in sight."
"That was because," said Aggie, "when the wagon started we all sat downunexpectedly, and----"
"Aggie!" Tish said, in a savage tone. "Now, young man, I want to saysomething to you, and I'd thank you----"
"Oh, I say!" he broke in, looking suddenly depressed, "I can see you arestill down on me. But don't scold me. Please don't. Because I am asensitive person, and you will ruin what was going to be a perfect day.I know I was wrong. I apologize. I eat my words. And now I'll leave you,because if you should vanish into thin air again I should have to go andlock myself up."
Well, with all his gaiety he did not look particularly gay, and he wasrather hollow in the cheeks. I came to the conclusion that he was goingto marry another young woman, partly to keep out of going to war, butpartly to spite the first. I must say I felt rather sorry for him,especially when I saw the way he looked at her. Oh, yes, I picked herout at once, because she never took her eyes off him.
I didn't think she was fooled much, either, because she looked as if sheneeded to go off into a corner and have a good cry. Well, she got herwish later, if that was what she wanted.
But Tish is a woman of one idea. While he chattered with one eye on thegirl, Tish was eyeing him coldly. At last she caught him by the arm.
"I have something to say to you, young man," she commenced. "I want toask you what you think of any one who----"
"I beg your pardon," he interrupted, and freed his arm. "Awfully sorry.I think a young lady over there wishes to speak to me."
He left us briskly enough, but he slowed up before he got across theroom. He stopped once and half turned, too, with the unhappiest faceI've ever seen on a human being. Aggie was feeling in her knitting bagfor the glasses.
"Is she pretty?" she asked.
"Too pretty to be a second choice," I replied, shortly. "She's a nicelittle thing, and deserves something better than a warmed-over heart."
Tish had been angry enough before, but when I told her that he had beendisappointed in love, and was merely making the girl a tool, her eyeswere savage.
"She is pretty," Aggie observed. "Perhaps, after all, he _does_ loveher. Or if not he may learn to. And he cannot be very unhappy aboutmarrying her. He said, you k
now, it was a perfect day."
"Go down and get into the car," Tish said, in a choking voice. "I'll fixhis perfect day for him. Go down and start the engine."
I took a last glance as Aggie and I left the License Court, and if wehad had any doubts they vanished then, because he was speaking to thegirl with angry gestures, and she was certainly crying.
"Brute," Tish said, with her eyes on him. "A bully as well as a slacker.Never mind. She won't have to put up with him long. If I have anyinfluence in this community that youth will be drafted and sent to a mudhole in France. Mark my words," she went on, settling her hat with ajerk, "that boy will be registered as a single man before this day'sover. Go and start the engine, Lizzie. I daresay you remember thatmuch."
Seeing that she had a plan, and "ours not to reason why, ours but to doand die," as Aggie frequently quotes, we went down to the street again.I was even then vaguely apprehensive, an apprehension not withoutreason, as it turned out. For, reaching over to start the engine,