CHAPTER 5
My work in the school library became the only time I could really clear my head. Ms. Vorax didn't seem to mind the quiet and I preferred it. She seemed preoccupied and she looked thinner than ever by Friday afternoon. I noticed her reading that big leather book again though she tried to keep it hidden underneath her desk. I wondered if I would find any information on Werewolves in it.
"Excuse me, Grazi? I'm going head off to the ladies' room for a minute, okay? You can cover things in here till I get back." She excused herself and I waited for her to exit the room then I took my chance. I carefully picked up the book from where she had put it under the desk and skimmed the index. It was written in English, but it was old. As in ye really olde booke. There were detailed illustrations covering the pages. Beautiful really, but I had no time to admire the artwork. I came across a page depicting a Wolf-man on two legs. It was an ugly creature and in his arms, was the body of a ravaged woman. Underneath it said, "Ye accursed wulfman or wyrwulf dines on the weak and fragile. Women and children, the Devil's owne prefers to indulge in the bloode of ye innocents. Some villages sacrifice the ill or bastard borne to appease the beasts. Forsaken by God, ye wulfman is the Devil's own pet. He obeys his master's call and is a true hellhound." I stared in horror at the image. Saliva dripped from huge elongated fangs. It had a small female child in its arms with huge slash marks across her small chest. It was horrible. I had seconds to contemplate what I just read. I could hear Ms. Vorax's footsteps approaching. Before she could turn the doorknob to the library I had replaced the book and had gone back to restacking a series of old Encyclopedias in the research section. Funny books really, but I guess that's what people used before Google.
"Ms. Vorax, I wanted to ask you how your research is coming along?" I asked her as she approached her desk. She looked around as if she could tell something was amiss. I hated it when teachers did that.
"Oh, um, very good, Maria, thanks. So how are your classes? I hear you are quite the student."
"They're fine, thanks."
"I also hear there is a big dance coming up."
"Yeah, it's the Annual Harvest Dance."
"So, are you going to go with Mr. De La Cruz? You guys have been hanging around together a lot."
"Oh, we're just friends. You know, we jog together, that's it really." Spending time with Sebastian on the track a couple of times a week was probably the most I'd ever been with a boy. My heart sped up at the thought of going to the ball with him. I shook my head, there was no way he'd ever ask me. Who was I kidding?
"You know you could ask him," Ms. Vorax said with a sly smile. "Stranger things have happened, Maria." I smiled back, she really had no idea.
"Oops, there's the bell. Enjoy your lunch."
"Thanks. You too, Ms. Vorax."
"Oh, I will," she said and smiled again.
I was grateful to leave the library. It was stifling in the relentless heat. The air was stale and it smelled like mold or maybe a dead mouse or something. My conversation with Ms. Vorax got my mind working. Maybe I could ask Sebastian to the ball? I grabbed a tray from the stand and picked up a smoked turkey on rye with lettuce and tomato and a carton of milk.
I sat outside in the quad, away from the crowded cafeteria. Angela was nowhere in sight and I didn't want to sit inside alone. I sat under an oak tree near the track, it was the only place that offered a little shade that wasn't occupied. I no sooner bit into my sandwich than Sebastian plunked down next to me in all his glory. His hair was casually mussed and true to form he had no books. He never seemed to carry any books with him. He playfully bumped my shoulder and took a deep breath while turning his face up to the sun. He seemed happy. Sebastian had a relaxed air about him like he was exactly where he wanted to be and he knew everyone was glad he was there too. The kind of guy every girl at school dreamed about, but not conceited or stuck up. The polar opposite. He made you feel valued and important. It was a gift.
"Hey, Grazi! What's goin' on?" He never said much, even when we jogged. He seemed to appreciate my desire for silence. I loved to run now and he seemed to like it too. He said I challenged him to do his best. He had no idea that by now I could run circles around him.
"Hey, um, I'm good. Just grabbing lunch." I tried to swallow the bite I had taken without choking, shocked as I was by this unexpected visit. He kept looking at me from under his dark lashes and I could feel my heart speed up.
"Yeah, I see that." He smiled and brushed a crumb off my lip and I was shocked by the gesture. He never moved to touch me before.
"So, I think all our work has been paying off. I was two minutes ahead of everyone at practice this morning."
"Great! Um, you guys practice in the morning?"
"Yeah, you know, so it's not so hot. From 6:00-7:30 most mornings."
"Oh. Cool."
"Yeah."
"So,"
"So?"
He smiled and I looked down. We sat together for a while after that. Not really looking at each other, but not looking away either. He reached his long-tanned fingers over the cool shaded grass. I could feel it nearing mine and my own fingers strained towards him. I'm not sure who moved first, but we touched. Our hands wove themselves together, I could feel his pulse. Soon my heart beat with his. He smelled wonderful, like fresh laundry and sunshine. I smiled and his hand squeezed mine.
"Will you come to the track today?" His voice was so nice, not too deep like some boys but not girly either. He had a tinge of pink across his cheeks like he got when we went running. My heart continued to thud in my chest.
"Yeah sure, after my, um, lessons. Five o'clock?"
"Good. I'll see you then." Another squeeze and he sprinted away as the bell signaling next period rang. I sat there in a stupor looking at my hand. Had Sebastian really just sat by me in the quad during lunch? Where everyone could see? I smiled in wonder until one of the cheerleaders walked by and knocked my tray over.
"Ooops. You'll clean that, won't you?" Expectedly, I was late to my next class.
"Again!" Fr. Gallagher, aka Uncle Sean, thrust a broom handle at me. I blocked and moved. My reflexes quicker than ever. I had no formal training in martial arts or fighting, but I was fast and I was strong. My body seemed to know what to do before my mind did. The sound of wood breaking brought my attention up. I had crushed the handle of the broom in my hand. I dropped the broken bits of wood and somersaulted to a position by the door. I dropped into a crouch and swung my leg out catching my uncle behind the knee. He fell to the floor with a thud and I had him pinned.
"That's a good move there, girl. You're getting stronger."
I stood up and reached for my bottle of water. I took a long drink and wiped the sweat from my brow with the hem of my shirt. He was right. I felt strong. Along with the gold streak in my hair, it seemed I was gaining muscle. I was always on the thin side, but now my body was toned, sleek and muscular. My legs had curves in them now and my abs were pretty awesome if I did say so myself. Heck, I even had a bit of a chest developing. I allowed myself to get distracted and wound up on the cold hard wood floor. My uncle's foot hovered just above my throat.
"Grazi, you must concentrate. Never let yourself be sidetracked in the middle of a fight. The full moon approaches and with it your change. I cannot teach you everything you need to know before then. You must try to focus. Learn control."
"I am concentrating, Fr. Gallagher. It's not easy. I'm just supposed to believe I'm a Werewolf and destined for some big battle. But I'm just a girl, a teenage girl. What can I do?" He extended his hand and I took it.
"My niece isn't just some teenage girl. Truly, you are so much more. You are important. And, uh, it wouldn't kill you to call me Uncle Sean, would it?"
"Yeah, okay." We continued sparring and working out. Uncle Sean set up a treadmill for me and I ran ten miles so quickly I thought I broke the thing. I much preferred running outdoors, but it was almost impossible for me to go full speed without drawing attention to myself. He handed me a bottle of pro
tein water and my towel. I drank greedily and wiped the sweat from my brow, grateful for the ponytail that held my long hair off of my neck.
"Okay, we spent two hours working out, now you answer a question. That was the deal."
"Aye."
"How can this be real? How can I be a Werewolf?" He walked over to a pile of books set up on a makeshift desk on the other side of our training room. He looked barely disheveled. Two strenuous hours sparring and he hardly broke a sweat.
"Are you a Werewolf, too?"
He paused in our training room in the basement of the Church right on the school grounds. No one knew Fr. Gallagher was my uncle, we decided to keep that a secret. But still it wouldn't be unusual to see a student head over to the Church after classes. I watched as my uncle fingered a bent page. Before we began our physical training, we had gone over some basics of being a Werewolf. For example, all Wolves have different individual areas of strength, like some Wolves have like better hearing than others, but for the most part we all had superior hearing and olfactory senses. Werewolves healed quickly, were faster and stronger than regular people and, my personal favorite, got real hairy at each full moon.
"I told you already I am Beta of the Pack Greyback. That means second in charge. Rolf, your grandfather, is Alpha and Michael is a soldier. The Hounds of God is a vast army of various packs across Europe. We are indeed all Werewolves. Just not like you."
"What makes me so different? And how many Werewolves are there?"
"In our pack, there are over a hundred, but we are a larger pack."
"You said Europe. What about here?"
"As of yet, there are no American packs officially affiliated with the Hounds of God. It's complicated. There are political reasons, most likely uninteresting to you." I didn't disagree with him so I waited for him to continue.
"How am I different, Uncle Sean?"
"I don't know, Grazi, but we need to find out. Have you been following the news?"
"You mean the animal attacks?"
"Yes," I could feel his tension rolling off him in waves. "Started around two moons ago. Can you remember anything about it?"
"No, I-, I mean that was when I was sick at school..." Horror and apprehension. "You don't think that I-"
"We don't know, Grazi. We've not had a Wolf like you in a long time. There are no documented cases, no records. There are things we don't know."
"What do you mean a Wolf like me? What is different about me?"
"Well, your ancestors are Italian and Irish, and more-"
"More what? So, because I am Irish and Italian I'm some sort of mixed breed Wolf? WTH? This isn't the 19th century? Plenty of people have Irish and Italian descendants!"
"No, Grazi, I didn't mean that. Look, it is complicated."
"You keep saying that! Whatever I am, I would never hurt anyone!"
"But your Wolf could. Especially if you can't control her."
The horrible truth that rang in my uncle's words haunted me for the rest of the lesson. Apparently, I was some kind of secret big deal. I was not ready to believe what he and Nonna so readily accepted. Like, how could I be a Werewolf, like a real Werewolf? It was inconceivable! Great, I sounded like the annoying guy in that princess movie. Oh boy!
I knew I was changing, but I could not make the connection between the physical changes I was experiencing and the possibility that I was an actual Werewolf. I mean, how could they all expect me to make that leap from a little muscle gain? And the thought that I could have actually harmed a person? That man I knew from the convenience store, the homeless man, that little boy too? Oh God, could it have been me? I didn't want to believe it. I felt like I had to vomit just considering the possibility.
"Midwinter will be here sooner than you think, child, it is all connected. I must teach you to talk to your Wolf."
"But my Wolf is me? What do you want me to do, talk to myself?" I was exasperated at this point.
"Your Wolf is a part of you. Granted, she is a strong part, but she is separate too. Her heart is your heart, but her instincts are her own. She is designed to protect you. She doesn't think like you, and an untrained Werewolf is an animal at heart. That is why we undergo strict training from infancy, so that we may know our Wolves. You have yet to commune with her. It is vital you learn how."
"What am I?" I could hear the despair in my voice. Was I some monster who took innocent lives? A ravaging animal?
"You are still you, Grazi. It is okay for you to need some time, child. It is a lot to take in." I held my head in my hands as my uncle spoke. A lot to take in? That was a serious understatement.
"Let's go over the reading assignment I gave you last night. Did you look up Peter Stump?"
"Yeah, Peter Stump was dubbed the Werewolf of Bedburg. So, what are you saying, he was an actual Werewolf? Does that mean I am capable of doing what he did too?"
"No, listen, what you must understand is that he committed horrible crimes, serial murders and cannibalism, and he blamed it on his lycanthropy. His Wolf followed his lead, Grazi. The truth is Peter Stump was a madman."
"I'm sure plenty of people would think I'm nuts too if I told them I was a teenage Werewolf!"
"Regardless of him being a Werewolf, Peter Stump was a psychopath, Grazi. The point I'm trying to make is, he had no pack. He was untrained. The lunacy of the man infected the beast. He was uncontrollable."
"So, some pack controlling him would have been better?"
"Grazi, having pack means being a part of something bigger than yourself. Like a family, but so much more. Your pack understands you, cares for you, and protects you. It nurtures you. Teaches you. The Hounds of God are an elite group of packs within the Werewolf community bound by a covenant with the Almighty to protect society. What better back up to have than that?"
"So, it's some kind of cult?"
"No, we're not a cult! Are you daft, girl?"
"I'm sorry! It's just too much! So why was Stump executed if no one believed in Werewolves?"
"Actually, many people did believe him. At that time, there were many trials against those accused of being Werewolves. It was thought that Werewolves were evil and they worked for the forces of darkness."
"Darkness. So, what, like, my Wolf could be evil?"
"I sincerely doubt it, Grazi. You are not evil and your Wolf, well, she is bound to you, to your soul. If she were evil you'd have to be evil first. But a Wolf is an animal, a hunter. It is in the nature of the beast to hunt."
"Yeah, but if Werewolves were thought to be evil for hundreds of years there must be some truth to it. I mean rumors usually start with a bit of truth, right?"
"Let me try to explain it to you like this, Grazi. Human beings can be either good or evil. As can Werewolves. We, however, are employed by the Catholic Church to keep the people of Earth and their bounty out of the hands of demons."
"I've gone to Catholic school my whole life, Father Gallagher. I know just what the Church has done and it wasn't all great." I admit I was being catty and a little obnoxious. But hey, my life as I knew it was over. I think I had a right to be.
"True enough. The Church has had many ups and downs over the last two thousand years. Corruption, dishonesty, misuse of power. Countless crimes can be attributed to the Catholic Church going back to the first popes. But, the Hounds of God is a righteous group. We choose the path of righteousness and we are holy indeed, anointed by God. We wage war with the Devil's minions for the right to hold domain over the Earth. We are its protectors."
"The Devil, like the Devil?"
"Yes, there is only one Devil, and he is forever waging war with the Almighty. His minions here are many. They take many forms, do many bad things. The witches are his strongest servants. They use blood magic to create chaos and destruction. They are thieves. They are the bringers of plagues and famine. The murderers of innocence."
"How do we stop them?" I trembled with energy. My body hummed as I listened to my uncle talk about what we would face in the months to c
ome. I felt scared. Terrified really, but determined too.
"First, you must learn what you are. Tonight's homework I want you to read about Thiess of Kaltenbrun."
I left my lesson with Uncle Sean frustrated and confused. I hefted the huge leather-bound book he gave me and shook my head. Jeez, ever heard of an e-book? It smelled too, like dust and something else I couldn't quite identify. I stuck it in my backpack and slung it over my shoulder. I felt as if a huge weight had settled over me, and no, not just in my school bag. How could I keep all of the people on Earth safe? It was ridiculous. Unfair. Unbelievable!