That afternoon Hugh unlocked Neil’s cell door. “The warden wants to see you.”
“What for?” It was too soon for his brother to shake out a confession from Charley or one of his buddies.
On the catwalk Neil noticed Marv watching with distrusting interest. Did he think Neil knew more than he was letting on? Should he tell the warden what he heard last night? Should he commit suicide by murder?
“I think he’s going to give you a job,” Hugh said.
An hour later Neil was pushing a cart with books past cells. A guy Neil recognized as associating with J.R. stopped him. “I’ve got a book I want to return.”
Neil noticed the man was missing a finger when he handed Neil the book. Neil reached for it but the man held on. “No one gets this but the Rat in the last cell.”
Neil nodded. “The Rat.” Even passing out library books couldn’t be without conflict. He noticed a small slip of paper poking from between a couple of pages. He placed the book on the left side of the cart where other prisoners wouldn’t see it.
The man looked pleased though barely a muscle moved on his face.
Neil continued his deliveries, aware of the man’s gaze as he moved from cell to cell. He desperately wanted to glance at the paper. Maybe it was nothing, but he doubted it. Near the end of the cell block he waited for a prisoner to choose a book. His left hand slipped behind the row of books on his cart and quickly fingered the book open and memorized the message of dots and dashes. He looked up to see the prisoner staring at him. Was this man one of J.R.’s gang? “You pick a book?”
“Yeah. That one.” He pointed to a Louis L'Amour. Neil handed him the book. The man looked Neil in the eye. “Don’t mess with J.R. and his boys.” The man’s sinewy arms and neck stiffened. “They’ll kill you.” His voice was almost a whisper.
Neil tried to swallow and pushed the cart. At the last cell he lifted the book he’d been saving. “A man down the way said you might enjoy reading this.” Neil’s voice quivered and he hated the weakness it revealed.
The Rat approached him. His hair was dark and slicked back and he had a scar across his right cheek. “What happened to the other book boy?”
Neil shrugged.
“I’m not sure if I like you.”
He stiffened. The feeling was mutual. For the first time since he’d arrived over three months ago Neil wondered if he’d live to finish out his sentence.
***
In the days that followed, Neil napped throughout the day and lay awake at night, listening to the tapped out messages passed along the cell block. With every message J.R.’s plan became clearer and Neil’s stomach hurt more. The pros and cons of what he should do with this information tapped out loaded responses back and forth in his mind until his head hurt too.
Every day drew closer to the fulfillment of J.R.’s plan and he dreaded the thought of seeing it. He wanted to do what was right—but he was almost convinced that meant certain death. However, if he didn’t do anything would he still live? If someone found out afterward that he knew of the plan—what would that mean?
As in this whole situation, there were no easy answers.
A guard passed.
“What time is it?”
“Time for you to do your time.” The guard gave him a smug look.
Maybe he wouldn’t say anything. Let this jerk get what he had coming.
Moments later Hugh came and unlocked Neil’s cell. “Visitors.”
***
Neil entered the visitors’ booth. Sunshine swayed back and forth, their son in her arms. She held Neil Jr. up for him to see. A swell of pride and sorrow washed over him. Neil wished she’d given their son a different name. Someday she might want to forget him and their son’s name would only serve as a reminder of the failure his father was.
“Neil, baby, what’s wrong?” Concern covered Sunshine’s face. “You look so tired and pale. I hate what this place is doing to you.”
“I’m ok.” The last thing he wanted was Sunshine worrying about him. “I guess sleeping on a cot instead of next to you is taking a toll.” He smiled.
Sunshine surveyed him. “Neil, what’s going on?”
“Nothing, babe. How are you doing?”
She squinted her eyes at him. “You’re a terrible liar, you know that?”
He nodded.
“A guy named Vern stopped by. He said he worked for your brother and was looking to clear you and hopefully find the real killer.”
“Great. Ken’s on it.”
Sunshine smiled and her face flushed with color. “I doubt I was very helpful.”
“Did he talk to Leonard?”
She nodded.
Neil Jr. fussed and Neil burned to hold him. It seemed the child had grown since their last visit.
“Did I tell you Leonard’s wife, Phyllis, is teaching me how to cut and set hair? Next week I’ll start helping her at the salon.” She smiled. “Hopefully by Christmas I’ll be able to support us.” She looked down at Neil Jr.
Neil cringed. He felt lousy leaving this all to her.
“Oh, and Leonard is fixing up an old shed for me and Neil Jr. to live in. It’s really cute. He even put flower boxes below each of the windows, and Phyllis is teaching me how to sew curtains.”
“I don’t know what I did to deserve such kind people to help us,” Neil said.
Sunshine smiled. “I guess God was watching over us.” Her voice was meek and she leaned back, as if unsure how Neil would respond.
He raised an eyebrow. “If God was watching over us, why am I here?”
“I don’t know.” Her voice shook.
He knew he’d upset her. “It’s okay, I’m glad Leonard and Phyllis are so good to you. Is Leonard here?”
“Yes, he said he had to pick up some parts.”
“When you leave can you send him in?”
“Are you mad?”
“No.” He smiled at her. “Not at all. I just need to ask him something.”
Neil sat across from the tall, gray-haired man and remembered his first meeting with Leonard. Now he practically considered the man his father.
“You look awful,” Leonard said.
Neil nodded.
“I can’t imagine it’s easy in here.”
“No, it’s not.” Neil didn’t know where to begin or what and how much to say. He unfolded the telegram, deciding to start with it.
Leonard read it and was silent. He shook his head. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what to say. I can’t believe it.”
Neil was surprised to see the hurt on Leonard’s face.
“I always wondered why your father never came to see you.”
“Yeah, well, when I was eleven I thought I was a real mechanic and I decided to adjust the brakes on my mom’s car. She’d been complaining about them and dad had been too busy. I really thought I was helping.”
Leonard lowered his forehead to his fingertips. “Oh, no.”
“Yes.” Neil looked down at his hands. “Our house was at the top of a hill. She drove right into a cement truck.”
They sat in silence.
“You were a child, surely your father realized that.” Leonard’s blue-gray eyes were beseeching.
“Not my old man. He said I should have known better. After that I couldn’t do anything right.”
“Is this what you wanted to ask me about?”
Neil shook his head. “No.” Neil looked around. “I have another problem. It’s…it’s. Well, what if you were in a situation that if you did what you thought was right you could get hurt or killed, but if you kept your mouth shut others including yourself might get hurt or killed?”
Leonard straightened. “You’re just full of tough ones today aren’t you?”
Neil relaxed a little. “Yeah, I guess so.”
Leonard rubbed his chin, his eyes steady on Neil. “You’re serious about this.”
Neil nodded.
Leonard sighed. “It sounds like you’re in a hard
situation. I don’t envy you. The standard I try to follow is that if I know the good I should do, and don’t do it, then that, according to the Bible, would be sin.”
Neil bit his lip. “I thought you’d say something along those lines.”
“Evil has a way of biting you in the butt.”
“Even trying to do the right thing has a way of biting me in the butt.”
“It does,” Leonard agreed. “But good will triumph. And if you survive this situation you’re concerned about, which I’ll pray you do, I believe you will be exonerated.”
Neil’s spirit lifted. “Are you certain?”
“I talked to that investigator your brother sent and we have some ideas. I wouldn’t be surprised if he doesn’t convince Willis or Scotty that he has some information that could implicate them. They don’t have as much to gain in this as Charley does.”
“How so?”
“Well, it seems Charley just inherited his uncle and aunt’s farm.”
***
Marv watched Neil as he returned from his visit.
Neil felt a stab when the metal door clanged behind him. Would he ever get used to that sound? The world sealed off from him? The denial of freedom? Life had done a complete one-eighty on him.
As far as he was concerned, his day—his week—was over. He spent so much time anticipating visits from both Sunshine and Leonard then felt such a low when they ended. With that one sound the hope he’d felt about Ken proving his innocence and living with Sunshine and Neil Jr. escaped through his cell bars. Hope could not be imprisoned. He wondered if he’d live long enough to hear a ‘Not guilty’ verdict or if J.R.’s plans would kill him. He slumped onto his cot.
“Did your girlfriend pay you a visit?” Marv’s voice slithered around the concrete block wall between them.
Neil stiffened. “How’d you know I have a girlfriend?”
“You’re not only innocent of murder, your innocent stupid. You think J.R.’s only got eyes and ears in here, man?” Marv chuckled. “He knows about everyone in here and some of the guys in other buildings.”
A shiver ran up Neil’s spine and spread outward. What was this man capable of?
“From what I hear, your little Sunshine is smokin’ hot.” Marv paused.
Neil knew Marv was allowing the knowledge that they knew her name sink in. He cradled a balled fist. Helpless.
“You really think she’s gonna be around when you get out?”
Sweat rose from Neil’s skin. He trembled with anger.
“If I remember right, J.R.’s familiar with Cleavemont.” He cackled.
***
That night as Neil lay in bed listening to J.R.’s gang scratch and tap out their plans he tried to fit together the sequence of events and who was assigned to what task. Some of the men must have been struggling with the Morse Code, because plans had to be repeated. This allowed Neil to get the big picture and see the flaws.
Knowing the weak spots of J.R.’s plans could prove beneficial—if he used it right. Neil could leverage his knowledge and the possible problems to maybe get J.R. to lay off him, and leave Sunshine alone. But Neil knew J.R. wasn’t the type to like anyone else calling the shots. Especially someone like him. He’d more likely force Neil to participate or consider him a liability and kill him.
He wished he could just ignore it and play innocent. Let J.R. and his gang get killed trying to escape. They deserved it. He smiled at the thought.
But what if they succeeded? What if guards and other prisoners were killed? What if the Rat succeeded in killing Hugh? What if J.R. got loose? He knew from their messages that they had getaway drivers on the outside ready to hide them.
“J.R.’s familiar with Cleavemont.” Marv’s words exploded in Neil’s mind. Was he implying he would escape to Cleavemont and go after Sunshine? Kidnap her maybe? He needed to warn her.
***
The next morning Neil took out a pen and paper and began composing a letter to Sunshine—maybe his last.
Hugh walked by Neil’s cell and gave him a nod.
Neil hadn’t been able to save the old farmer and his wife. But maybe he could save Hugh and others, both guards and inmates. If he could just let the authorities know in time.
***
Neil sealed the envelope, being sure to leave part of one end open before addressing it to Sunshine. Hugh walked by again and Neil smiled but held onto the letter. Ten minutes later a cocky guard with a slimy personality approached. Neil stood. “Guard, how long do you think it takes to get a letter to Cleavemont?”
The man sauntered over to Neil’s cell. “Two, maybe three days.”
Neil tensed. If his first plan didn’t work, it would be close.
“What’s the rush?” the guard asked.
“Oh nothing. Just thinking about my girl and want her to know how much I miss her.”
“Like it’s gonna do her any good. You might as well just resign yourself to the fact you’ll be getting a Dear John letter here one of these days.”
Neil hoped he was wrong. “Well, she hasn’t written one yet, so I want to get this letter to her before she does.” He fondled the envelope, pressed it to his chest and looked at the guard. “You fellows don’t read prisoner’s mail do you?”
The guard scrutinized him. “Why?”
“Well, it’s just that I’m missing my girl and wrote some pretty private things.” He winked.
A smutty grin spread across the guard’s lips. The man took the letter from Neil and looked over the envelope, he fingered the loose end of the flap. “I’m not sure a dangerous murderer should be trusted.”
“What can I possibly do behind these walls?”
“I don’t know. But I doubt we should be taking any chances.”
“C’mon man, it’s just to my girlfriend.”
“Yeah, probably telling her where you hid the money.”
“I was framed. C’mon man, just mail the letter.”
“Yeah, you’re innocent, just like everyone else in this joint. It’s always somebody else.” The guard chuckled as he wandered off.
Neil stood there, his heart pounding.
“You’re just plain stupid, ain’t you?” Marv said, his words interrupted Neil’s thoughts.
Neil startled. “What do you mean?” he said, acting dumb.
“If anyone is going to open your letter it’ll be old Bear. He’s as nosy and perverted as they come.”
Neil smiled. He hoped so.
***
Something was amiss. Neil felt it as soon as he entered the exercise yard. There was a tension that vibrated through muscles and furtive glances. An argument between two of J.R.’s guys broke out and several guards hustled toward them.
Everyone’s attention was on the altercation when Neil caught a movement out of the corner of his eye. Before he could react there was an arm around his neck and something sharp stabbing his side.
J.R. moved in front of him. “I hear you’ve intercepted our plan.”
Neil gulped. He’d gambled that the guard wasn’t on the take. And once again, he’d lost.
“Your knowledge of our plan creates a bit of a problem.”
Your knowledge of my knowledge creates an even bigger problem, Neil thought, his mind scrambling for solutions. Everything he’d thought of in case J.R. found out seemed ineffective.
“I knew I couldn’t trust you as soon as you entered this prison,” J.R. said, his eyes squinting. “Anyone who’s innocent,” he hissed the last word. “Is always looking for a way to prove themselves to the parole board.”
The guard who’d ratted on Neil passed behind J.R., a smug smile on his face.
“Sadly, you’re never going to have the chance to go before the parole board.”
The man behind Neil chuckled.
Neil could hardly hear J.R. over the pounding in his chest that echoed in his ears.
“I can’t have my plans ruined by your sudden demise, so you’ve just signed on to be part of our li
ttle escape plan.”
Neil glared at the large man in front of him.
“Only you’ll be one of the casualties.”
He shivered.
“Don’t worry,” J.R. continued. “I’ll comfort that cute little woman of yours.”
“Leave her alone.” Neil startled at the sound of his voice.
“Too late. I’ve got guys going to kidnap her right now.”
Neil’s insides clenched. God protect her—please. The prayer slipped out. He had never prayed before, but now, more than anything, he hoped God was real and Sunshine and his son were safe.
“You don’t cooperate and she’s as good as dead,” J.R. continued.
“And if I do?”
“She can come along with us.”
Neil considered which was worse. What were the chances J.R. was only bluffing? Marginal. Not enough to gamble with—as if he ever won.
The fight at the other end of the yard broke up and the men and guards dispersed.
“What do you want me to do?”
A wicked grin spread across J.R.’s face and he nodded to the man behind Neil who released his hold but stayed close enough that the man’s hot breath pressed into Neil’s neck.
“You don’t talk to no one. You understand?”
Neil nodded.
“Come dinner there’ll be a fight.”
“Tonight?”
“Yeah, we’ve moved the escape so you don’t have any time to let anyone else in on our plans.”
Neil felt cold despite the early fall heat. He wished now he’d said something to Leonard.
“I’m gonna give you a chance to show us you’re a man.”
Neil’s stomach clenched, afraid of J.R.’s next words.
“You’re gonna kill that guard named Hugh and then head to the kitchen and meet us in the big freezer.”
“Where you’ll chill,” said the man behind him.
“Shut up.” J.R. glared at the man, obviously not happy he’d slipped their plan to Neil.
A loud “no” sprung up inside Neil but he kept silent.
J.R. studied Neil a moment then spit on him.
Neil stiffened.
“You do things right and that may be the last time I have to spit on you—boy.”
The guards were moving them back inside and the man behind Neil gave him one more sharp poke. Neil saw Hugh interacting with prisoners across the yard.
***
Neil tossed on his cot working the situation from every angle. He feigned sleep whenever Hugh passed. He couldn’t bring himself to look at the man. He replayed his last conversations with Sunshine and Leonard. “Evil will bite you in the butt,” Leonard had said. What was it he’d said about doing good? Neil tried to remember. It had something to do with not doing the good you knew you should do was sin. Neil tapped his fingers against his lip.