part, it's romantic. Mostly. Anyway, this isn't about me. Steph has a history of dating guys who just don't treat her very well. The relationships last maybe four to eight months, and then she usually breaks up with them because they've stolen money from her or cheated on her.”

  “Seriously?” Nora said.

  “She dated a guy for a whole month after she learned he stole a thousand dollars from her. He begged her for another chance, and she gave it to him. She broke up with him after he stole another hundred. Frankly, Nicholas, except for the whole aura of death thing, is one of the better guys she's dated. At least as far as I can tell right now.”

  “Lordy, why do women date men so clearly bad for them?” Isabella sighed.

  The next morning Stephanie was up bright and early to make breakfast, and then she disappeared into her bedroom to work remotely for a few hours. Isabella and Maryann took advantage of her absence to perform several spells of protection and warding on the house. Then the four made plans to deal with Nicholas when they found out the reason for his death aura if that turned out to be dangerous. When Stephanie was finished working, she did what she told them she would do and took them out site-seeing in Seattle. They returned several hours later with cheesy postcards of the Space Needle and slightly buzzed from having drunk a lot more coffee than they were used to. They packed up their gear and headed to the site of the gig.

  The gig went well and afterwards they found plenty of people in the crowded bar willing to buy them drinks, although they mostly refused. They found Stephanie and Nicholas at the bar.

  “You were really great!” Stephanie shouted over the noise. “But I can't tell which one of you is which.”

  “Nicholas, could you tell us apart?” Isabella yelled.

  “You were on bass last song, with Leah as the lead singer, Maryann on drums, and Nora on guitar!” he answered.

  “Wow, you're right!” Maryann screamed. “We should buy you a drink!”

  “That's not necessary!”

  “It's all good fun!” Stephanie shouted.

  The band, and Stephanie, did not return to her house until quite late, or quite early.

  Stephanie didn't get up quite so early the next morning, but she did make breakfast for the group.

  “Is it raining again?” Nora asked, yawning.

  “It rains like over two-hundred days a year,” Stephanie answered. “But it's really not that depressing. At least not for me. Do you want to go out for a bit and see some more of the city? Nicholas should be showing up for lunch.”

  “Oh, no, Steph, we just don't have the energy like you do,” Maryann said.

  “That's fine. Not many people do,” she replied brightly.

  “I do need to go out and pick up a few things,” Isabella said.

  “I can take you anywhere you need to go,” Stephanie said.

  “Oh, no, I'll just take Leah. We won't be gone long,” she said, and pulled Leah away before Stephanie could protest any further. This left Maryann and Nora to talk to Stephanie. Isabella and Leah returned as Stephanie was starting to make lunch but said nothing about Isabella's mysterious errand. “Oh, please get the door,” Stephanie said, hearing the doorbell.

  Isabella walked to the door and opened it.

  Nicholas was folding his umbrella and made a motion to walk into the house, then suddenly stopped in his tracks, looking confused.

  “Is something wrong?” Isabella asked politely.

  “No, I just, well, no, nothing's wrong. So, aren't you going to invite me in?”

  “It's not my house. Anyway, I thought you were already welcome.”

  He forced a smile. “Of course I am. Steph?” he called in a loud voice.

  “Why are you standing in the rain, silly? Come in before you catch your death of cold,” she called back.

  “That seems unlikely,” Isabella said.

  “What?” he asked as he walked inside.

  “Nothing.”

  He went to greet Stephanie while Isabella quietly joined the band.

  “Pull out your necklaces,” she said. “And watch to see if Nicholas reacts to them at all.”

  “Lunch is ready!” Stephanie called.

  They all sat down at the table, each band member had a necklace prominently dangling on a silver chain. Nora's was a plain silver cross, Leah's was a crucifix, Maryann's was an ankh, and Isabella's was an enamel firefly. Since they were paying attention, they could tell Nicholas noticed the necklaces and seemed slightly uncomfortable. Isabella gave a signal to Leah, who got up from the table. In a minute, Stephanie's cell phone started ringing.

  “I'm sorry, I have to take this,” she said, and went into the bedroom. She returned in a few minutes. “I'm sorry; I have to go to work! It's an emergency. I'll be back as soon as I can. Nicholas, see yourself out,” she said, and was gone in rush of breathless energy.

  Leah re-emerged carrying something large, plastic, and brightly-colored behind her back as the door slammed shut.

  “Well, I really need to go myself,” Nicholas said, standing up.

  “We need to talk first,” Isabella said. “I think you've been lying to Maryann's cousin.”

  “What? Don't be ridiculous.”

  “Ladies, present arms,” Isabella said.

  The other three brandished their necklaces.

  “In the name of Christ, get thee behind me,” Nora and Leah said in unison, although Leah spoke in Spanish.

  Nicholas hissed and shrank backwards.

  “As I thought,” Isabella said. “An aura of death, and once I protected the house you couldn't get in without being invited. Saying you couldn't have garlic due to acid reflux is clever, Mr. Vampire. I'm guessing you probably slashed that tire so you could have an excuse to talk to Stephanie? And maybe you have so many interests in common with her because you studied up on her interests?”

  “You stay away from my cousin!” Maryann snapped.

  “It's not like that,” he hissed. His eyes had turned red and his canines had lengthened noticeably. “Steph's really wonderful. If I wanted to hurt her, I would have done so. I'm not evil or anything. I just want to have a normal life. And Steph makes me feel normal.”

  “Why is she so down, then? You don't think I didn't notice? She's usually much more energetic.”

  “I didn't hurt her,” he said defensively. “She doesn't even know I've been feeding. I'm not a monster or anything.”

  “You drink human blood!” Nora snapped. “You're a monster by definition! If you really didn't want to risk hurting anyone ever again, you know what you have to do. You should just walk into the sun and trust in God to take care of your soul.”

  “You don't know anything,” he said sullenly. “You don't know what it's like to be cursed to be a monster and fight against the urge to kill. You don't know what it's like to watch everyone you know and love die around you!”

  “Here's the thing, we don't care about your angst or despair or whatever,” she retorted. “Maybe you're a reformed vampire, whatever that actually means. But you've been sucking blood from poor Steph without her knowing which is pretty terrible, and we're pretty sure you were stalking her in the first place. Maybe way back when you were turned into a vampire, that was considered romantic but now it's a crime, which you should know. So you can say you're sorry and all that, but when you steal someone's blood and stalk them so you can manipulate them into dating you, then that proves you're not really sorry at all. You're just being more careful about how you get at your victims so you're less likely to get caught.”

  He bared his fangs at them.

  “And here's what's going to happen,” Maryann said. “You're going to leave this house and never come back. You will never see Stephanie again. No calls, no letters, no tweets, no texts, no posts on her wall. It will be like you never existed.”

  “That's going to hurt her terribly. Do you really want me to do that?” he asked.

  “Let's se
e. Let my cousin continue to date a stalker who is already draining her blood and will likely at some point give into his frenzy and possibly kill her, or break her up with a stalker which will cause some emotional trauma but far less than getting her blood sucked out of her by a fiend!” Maryann snapped.

  He straightened up and suddenly looked a lot more menacing.

  Isabella took the plastic thing from Leah.

  “Ah, so you made the phone call to get Steph away?”

  They nodded.

  “I have been alone too long! I will not let anything stand in the way of my happiness!” he declared.

  “And that makes you a selfish jerk in addition to being a monster,” Nora retorted.

  “Or in the way of Steph's happiness,” he growled.

  “Yeah, I know that totally convinces me of your sincerity.”

  “So what are you well-intentioned mortals going to do to enforce this break-up condition?”

  “Well, once you leave we'll un-invite you from this house again,” Isabella said.

  “That's not going to matter once Steph invites me in again.”

  “You're going to have other problems once we force you out of this house.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Not all vampire hunters go by the name Van Helsing,” Leah said. “But it doesn't mean we can't find them.”

  “You found a hunter? And you told him about me?” he hissed.

  “I won't let you hurt my cousin!” Maryann said.

  “You may be able to get away. But you probably shouldn't waste your time here,” Isabella said.

  “They have faith to protect them,” he snarled. “But what will protect you should I decide to rip your throat out before I