CHAPTER IV
THE BROAD ROAD
Bernard Monck never forgot the day of Scooter's death. It was asindelibly fixed in his memory as in that of Tessa.
The child's wild agony of grief was of so utterly abandoned a nature asto be almost Oriental in its violence. The passionate force of herresentment against her mother also was not easy to cope with though hequelled it eventually. But when that was over, when she had wept herselfexhausted in his arms at last, there followed a period of numbness thatmade him seriously uneasy.
Mrs. Ralston had gone out before the tragedy had occurred, but MajorRalston presently came to his relief. He stooped over Tessa with a fewkindly words, but when he saw the child's face his own changed somewhat.
"This won't do," he said to Bernard, holding the slender wrist. "We mustget her to bed. Where's her _ayah_?"
Tessa's little hand hung limply in his hold. She seemed to behalf-asleep. Yet when Bernard moved to lift her, she roused herself tocling around his neck.
"Please keep me with you, dear Uncle St. Bernard! Oh, please don't goaway!"
"I won't, sweetheart," he promised her.
The _ayah_ was nowhere to be found, but it was doubtful if her presencewould have made much difference, since Tessa would not stir from herfriend's sheltering arms, and wept again weakly even at the doctor'stouch.
So it was Bernard who carried her to her room, and eventually put her tobed under Major Ralston's directions. The latter's face was very graveover the whole proceeding and he presently fetched something in amedicine-glass and gave it to Bernard to administer.
Tessa tried to refuse it, but her opposition broke down before Bernard'svery gentle insistence. She would do anything, she told him piteously,if only--if only--he would stay with her.
So Bernard stayed, sending a message to The Green Bungalow to explainhis absence, which found Mrs. Ralston as well as Stella and brought theformer back in haste.
Tessa was in a deep sleep by the time she arrived, but, hearing thatStella did not need him, Bernard still maintained his watch, onlypermitting Mrs. Ralston to relieve him while he partook of luncheon withher husband.
Netta did not appear for the meal to the unspoken satisfaction of themboth. They ate almost in silence, Major Ralston being sunk in a speciesof moody abstraction which Bernard did not disturb until the meal wasover.
Then at length, ere he rose to go, he deliberately broke into his host'sgloomy reflections. "Will you tell me," he said courteously, "exactlywhat it is that you fear with regard to the child?"
Major Ralston continued to be abstracted for fully thirty seconds afterthe quiet question; then, as Bernard did not repeat it but merelywaited, he replied to it.
"There are plenty of things to be feared for a child like that. It's acriminal shame to have kept her out here so long. What I actuallybelieve to be the matter at the present moment, is heart trouble."
"Ah! I thought so." Bernard looked across at him with gravecomprehension. "She had a bad shock the other day."
"Yes; a shock to the whole system. She lives on wires in any case. I amgoing to examine her presently, but I am pretty sure I am right. Whatshe really wants--" Major Ralston stopped himself abruptly, so abruptlythat a twinkle of humour shone momentarily in Bernard's eyes.
"Don't jam on the brakes on my account!" he protested gently. "I am withyou all the way. What does she really want?"
Major Ralston uttered a gruff laugh. It was practically impossible notto confide in Bernard Monck. "She wants to get right away from thatvicious little termagant of a mother of hers. There's no love betweenthem and never will be, so what's the use of pretending? She wants toget into a wholesome bracing, outdoor atmosphere with someone who knowshow to love her. She'll probably go straight to the bad if shedoesn't--that is, if she lives long enough."
The humour had died in Bernard's eyes. They shone with a very differentlight as he said, "I have thought the same thing myself." He paused amoment, then slowly, "Do you think her mother would be persuaded to handher over to me?" he said.
Ralston's brows went up. "To you! For good and all do you mean?"
"Yes." In his steady unhurried fashion Bernard made answer. "I have beenthinking of it for some time. As a matter of fact, it was to consult youabout it that I came here to-day. I want it more than ever now."
Ralston was staring openly. "You'd have your hands full," he remarked.
Bernard smiled. "I daresay. But, you see, we're chums. To use your ownexpression I know how to love her. I could make her happy--possibly goodas well."
Ralston never paid compliments, but after a considerable pause he said,"It would be the best thing that ever happened to the imp. So far as hermother's permission goes, I should say she is cheap enough to be hadalmost without asking. You won't need to use much persuasion in thatdirection."
"An infernal shame!" said Bernard, the hot light again in his eyes.
Ralston agreed with him. "All the same, Tessa can be a positive littledemon when she likes. I've seen it, so I know. She has got a good dealof her mother's temperament only with a generous allowance of heartthrown in."
"Yes," Bernard said. "And it's the heart that counts. You can dopractically anything with a child like that."
Ralston got up. "Well, I'm going to have another look at her, and thenI'm due at The Green Bungalow. I can't say what is going to happenthere. You ought to clear out, all of you; but a journey would probablybe fatal to Mrs. Monck's infant just now. I can't advise it."
"Wherever Stella goes, I go," said Bernard firmly.
"Yes, that's understood." Ralston gave him a keen look. "You're incharge, aren't you? But those who can go, must go, that's certain. Thatscoundrel will be convicted in a day or two. And then--look out forsqualls!"
Bernard's smile was scarcely the smile of the man of peace. "Oh yes, Ishall look out," he said mildly. "And--incidentally--Tommy is teachingme how to shoot."
They returned to Tessa who was still sleeping, and Mrs. Ralston gave upher place beside her to Bernard, who settled down with a paper to spendthe afternoon. Major Ralston departed for The Green Bungalow, and thesilence of midday fell upon the place.
It was still early in the year, but the warmth was as that of a softsummer day in England. The lazy drone of bees hung on the air, andsomewhere among the tamarisks a small, persistent bird, called andcalled perpetually, receiving no reply.
"A fine example of perseverance," Bernard murmured to himself.
He had plenty of things to think about--to worry about also, had it beenhis disposition to worry; but the utter peace that surrounded him madehim drowsy. He nodded uncomfortably for a space, then finally--since heseldom did things by halves--laid aside his paper, leaned back in hischair, and serenely slept.
Twice during the afternoon Mrs. Ralston tiptoed along the verandah,peeped in upon them, and retired again smiling. On the second occasionshe met her husband on the same errand and he drew her aside, his handthrough her arm.
"Look here, Mary! I've talked to that little spitfire without muchresult. She talks in a random fashion of going to Udalkhand. What heractual intentions are I don't know. Possibly she doesn't know herself.But one thing is certain. She is not going to be attached to your trainany longer, and I have told her so."
"Oh, Gerald!" She looked at him in dismay. "How--inhospitable of you!"
"Yes, isn't it?" His hand was holding her arm firmly. "You see, Ichance to value your safety more than my reputation for kindness tooutsiders. You are going to Bhulwana at the end of this week. Come! Youpromised."
"Yes, I know I did." She looked at him with distress in her eyes. "I'vewished I hadn't ever since. There is my poor Stella in bad trouble forone thing. She says she will have to change her _ayah_. And there is--"
"She has got Peter--and her brother-in-law. She doesn't want you too,"said her husband.
"And now there is little Tessa," proceeded Mrs. Ralston, growing moreand more worried as she proceeded.
"Yes, there is Tessa," he agr
eed. "You can offer to take her to Bhulwanawith you if you like. But not her mother as well. That is understood. Itwon't break her heart to part with her, I fancy. As for you, my dear,"he gave her a whimsical look, "the sooner you are gone the better Ishall be pleased. Lady Harriet and the Burton contingent left to-day."
"I hate going!" declared Mrs. Ralston almost tearfully. "I shouldn'thave promised if I could have foreseen all that was going to happen."
He squeezed her arm. "All the same--you promised. So don't be silly!"
She turned suddenly and clung to him.
"Gerald! I want to stay with you. Let me stay! I can't bear the thoughtof you alone and in danger."
He stared for a moment in astonishment. Demonstrations of affection werealmost unknown between them. Then, with a shamefaced gesture, he bentand kissed her.
"What a silly old woman!" he said.
That ended the discussion and she knew that her plea had been refused.But the fashion of its refusal brought the warm colour to her fadedface, and she was even near to laughing in the midst of her woe. Howdear of Gerald to put it like that! She did not feel that she had everfully realized his love for her until that moment.
Seeing that her presence in her own bungalow was not needed just then,she betook herself once more to Stella, and again the afternoon silencefell like a spell of enchantment. That there could be any element ofunrest anywhere within that charmed region seemed a thing impossible.The peace of Eden brooded everywhere.
The evening was drawing on ere Bernard slowly emerged from his sereneslumber and looked at the child beside him. Some invisible influence--orperhaps some bond of sympathy between them--had awakened her at the samemoment, for her eyes were fixed upon him. They shone intensely,mysteriously blue in the subdued light, wistful, searching eyes, whollyunlike the eyes of a child.
Her hand came out to his. "Have you been here all the time, dear?" shesaid.
She seemed to be still half-wrapped in the veil of sleep. He leaned toher, holding the little hand up against his cheek.
"Almost, my princess," he said.
She nestled to him snuggling her fair head into his shoulder. "I've beendreaming," she whispered.
"Have you, my darling?" He gathered her close with a compassionatetenderness for the frailty of the little throbbing body he held.
Tessa's arms crept round his neck. "I dreamt," she said, "that you andI, Uncle St. Bernard, were walking in a great big city, and there was achurch with a golden spire. There were a lot of steps up to it--andScooter--" a sob rose in her throat and was swiftly suppressed--"wassunning himself on the top. And I tried to run up the steps and catchhim, but there were always more and more and more steps, and I couldn'tget any nearer. And I cried at last, I was so tired and disappointed.And then--" the bony arms tightened--"you came up behind me, and took myhand and said, 'Why don't you kneel down and pray? It's much thequickest way.' And so I did," said Tessa simply. "And all of a suddenthe steps were gone, and you and I went in together. I tried to pick upScooter, but he ran away, and I didn't mind 'cos I knew he was safe. Iwas so happy, so very happy. I didn't want to wake again." A dolefulnote crept into Tessa's voice; she swallowed another sob.
Bernard lifted her bodily from the bed to his arms. "Don't fret, littlesweetheart! I'm here," he said.
She lifted her face to his, very wet and piteous. "Uncle St. Bernard,I've been praying and praying--ever such a lot since my birthday-party.You said I might, didn't you? But God hasn't taken any notice."
He held her close. "What have you been praying for, my darling?" hesaid.
"I do--so--want to be your little girl," answered Tessa with a break inher voice. "I never really prayed for anything before--only the thingsAunt Mary made me say--and they weren't what I wanted. But I do wantthis. And I believe I'd get quite good if I was your little girl. I toldGod so, but I don't think He cared."
"Yes. He did care, darling." Very softly Bernard reassured her. "Don'tyou think that ever! He is going to answer that prayer of yours--prettysoon now."
"Oh, is He?" said Tessa, brightening. "How do you know? Is He going tosay Yes?"
"I think so." Bernard's voice and touch were alike motherly. "But youmust be patient a little longer, my princess of the bluebell. It isn'tgood for us to have things straight off when we want them."
"You do want me?" insinuated Tessa, squeezing his neck very hard.
"Yes. I want you very much," he said.
"I love you," said Tessa with passionate warmth, "better--yes, betternow than even Uncle Everard. And I didn't think I ever could do that."
"God bless you, little one!" he said.
Later, when Major Ralston had seen her again, they had anotherconference. The doctor's suspicions were fully justified. Tessa wouldneed the utmost care.
"She shall have it," Bernard said. "But--I can't leave Stella now. Ishall see my way clearer presently."
"Quite so," Ralston agreed. "My wife shall look after the child atBhulwana. It will keep her quiet." He gave Bernard a shrewd look."Perhaps you--and Mrs. Monck also--will be on your way Home before thehot weather," he said. "In that case she could go with you."
Bernard was silent. It was impossible to look forward. One thing wascertain. He could not desert Stella.
Ralston passed on. Being reticent himself he respected a man who couldkeep his own counsel.
"What about Mrs. Ermsted?" he said. "When will you see her?"
"To-night," said Bernard, setting his jaw.
Ralston smiled briefly. That look recalled his brother. "No time likethe present," he said.
But the time for consultation with Netta Ermsted upon the future of herchild was already past. When Bernard, very firm and purposeful, walkeddown again after dinner that night, Ralston met him with a wryexpression and put a crumpled note into his hand.
"Mrs. Ermsted has apparently divined your benevolent intentions," hesaid.
Bernard read in silence, with meeting brows.
DEAR MARY:
This is to wish you and all kind friends good-bye. So that there may beno misunderstanding on the part of our charitable gossips, pray tellthem at once that I have finally chosen the broad road as it reallysuits me best. As for Tessa--I bequeath her and her little morals to thefirst busybody who cares to apply for them. Perhaps the worthy FatherMonck would like to acquire virtue in this fashion. I find the task onlybreeds vice in me. Many thanks for your laborious and, I fear, whollyfutile attempts to keep me in the much too narrow way.
Yours,
NETTA.
Bernard looked up from the note with such fiery eyes that Ralston whowas on the verge of a scathing remark himself had to stop out of sheercuriosity to see what he would say.
"A damnably cruel and heartless woman!" said Bernard with deliberation.
Ralston's smile expressed what for him was warm approval. "She's nothingbut an animal," he said.
Bernard took him up short. "You wrong the animals," he said. "The veryleast of them love their young."
Ralston shrugged his shoulders. "All the better for Tessa anyhow."
Bernard's eyes softened very suddenly. He crumpled the note into a balland tossed it from him. "Yes," he said quietly. "God helping me, itshall be all the better for her."