Chapter 11
The next day, soon as school let out, Lori and I ran out to her car and drove to my house. She waited while I took a shower and got ready to go out, then we went to her house, and she got ready. We spent about an hour in her bedroom fixing our hair, putting on makeup, and calling people. We split up this bag of weed Lori had scored the day before from Calvin's brother and rolled a joint. Soon as we got back in her car, we lit it and started driving around town. We drove by the park where they play basketball and went by the SpeedMart telling everyone we ran into about Alley's party. Then we drove over to Terrence West High School.
When we pulled into the parking lot, Lori saw some black guys she knew sitting in a truck, so she pulled up beside them. These guys were old, probably in their late twenties. I don't know where Lori knew them from, but they seemed to know her. First thing she asked them, after she rolled down her window, was if they knew where we could find this guy, DJ. She said she wanted to buy some coke. I was confused because I thought DJ was one of the drug dealers Lori owed a lot of money to, and I was glad when these guys said they didn't know where he was. But they told us about a party over in Minnith and said if we went there later, we'd for sure find somebody selling.
When we drove away, I asked, "What the hell do you want to see DJ for?"
She said, "To buy some coke," real matter of fact.
I said, "Wasn't he one of the guys who was after you? Don't you owe him money?"
She said, "No, that's all over…no, we're straight."
I said, "But I thought you quit."
She said, "Well, I just wanna get some for the party." And all of a sudden, I did too. Just her mentioning the coke kinda made my spine tingle. That's how it was with some drugs. Soon as you start thinking about getting some, you start wanting it a lot more, and then you get anxious and start thinking, 'Well, what if we don't find any?' So now I was sort of irritated at Lori because she'd brought up the idea of scoring coke and got me thinking about it.
After we left the high school, we drove by the SpeedMart again, then got some food at Taco Bell and went over to Alley's. Her apartment was in a little stripmally place on the second floor above an insurance company, right off the main drag, and you had to park in the back and go up some steps to get to it. When we walked in, we saw a lot of people already there, and it was only about six o'clock. Keenan's brother, Dwayne, had gotten the keg for the party, and he was there with all his redneck friends. I saw a lot of other people I didn't know, mostly guys. They all looked the same, a lot of muscles, tight t-shirts, tattoos and earrings, which made me think they were all bouncers at the same strip club or something. When I went to get a beer, they were standing around the keg arguing over whether we should be listening to country or rap. Then they all began staring at me, looking me up and down. They asked me what I thought, country or rap. I told them that Alley liked country music, and it was her apartment. One of them said, "Well, there you go. Hey, Alley, you got some good country we'd could play?" Then I told them I always thought all those country guys were gay, and the rest of them start hooting and laughing and giving that guy a hard time. He wanted me to explain myself, but I ignored him, got a beer, and went into the kitchen to talk to Alley and Lori. I didn't like guys who seemed to spend more time worrying about their looks than I did about mine.
At first, the party wasn't much fun because we didn't know most of the people there. It was a lot of older, sicko guys, the kind who show up to high school parties for free beer and a chance to hit on high school girls—guys like Dwayne. Alley tried to collect money for the beer, but nobody wanted to pay, so I took over, told everyone to pay up or get out, and most people gave me something. Then I stood at the door and collected money from everyone who came in, and that's when the Lifegate kids started arriving. Chelsea, Tamiah, and Caitlin came in all decked out and already drunk along with Eric Cole, Trent, Russ, and Kyle. Keenan and Chad, who were ex-Lifegate students, showed up with their crew of ghouls all wearing tight t-shirts, gold chains and ball caps going every which way. They all stunk of cologne in an incredible way, which made me wonder how they were able to sit in a car with each other on the way over. Some kids from the Catholic school and regular high school were also arriving. I knew most of them. They were all associated with Lifegate in one way or another. Then a bunch of other kids from our school, kids you don't usually see at parties, started showing up. They were standing there in one big group, just inside the door, looking awkward and nervous. I told them where to get cups and where the keg was and made them move out of the way for the people coming in.
Now, as Lifegate kids, it was kind of our thing to be real loud and bring a lot of attention to ourselves whenever we were out in public. It might have been because we went to a really small school and were comfortable together and didn't have to worry about offending each other. It could have also been our way of letting everyone else know we weren't scared, and we were proud of where we were from. Whenever we showed up at a party, no matter where it was, it became our party. We'd try to take it over and do the best we could to turn it up a notch.
So real quick, the country music was off the stereo, replaced by T.I. Keenan and Chad carried the keg into the kitchen because the line was getting long and we needed more room. I quit working the door, and all of us girls started dancing in the middle of the room, bunched up in one big group the way we always do. People started sliding the furniture up against the walls, and everyone who wasn't dancing sort of cleared out of our way. The party was getting crunk. All the kids from Lifegate were acting crazy and hanging on each other and being overly sexual because we all knew each other and we knew how it freaked people out. The older creeps were loving it, but we weren't doing it for them. It's how we had fun. People were rolling joints and passing them around, and guys were wrestling on the floor. A bunch of freshman girls were sitting up on the back of the couch bouncing to music, and the place just got louder and louder.
I wasn't even drunk yet, but I was really enjoying myself. I was enjoying being around the kids from my school, even the ones who hadn't been real friendly to me over the last couple weeks. I wasn't thinking about Calvin or Corena or any of that shit. I wasn't even thinking about those dickheads Dwayne, Keenan, and Trent, who'd been telling people they ran a train on me that night when I was so drunk. Seemed like everyone was there to forget and have a good time and be kids again. For me, it'd been a long time since I'd been able to do that.
Then, right in the middle of it, Lori came up to me and said she wanted to go check out that other party to see if she could buy some coke. I'd forgotten all about the idea. I said, "No way, I'm having too much fun," but she started begging me. She had this way of talking to you, if she wanted something, that made you feel like you were her only hope or her only friend, and everything hung on you.
She said, "Please, Macy, I need you to go. I'm scared to go alone."
I said, "Why don't we go later?" But she wanted to go right then, and I knew she wouldn't stop bothering me until we did. I said, "Okay, but we're not staying long. We're just gonna go there and come right back."
We ran outside, got in Lori's car, and started driving across town towards Minnith. I got a CD out of the center console and put it in and started talking to Lori about all the people who'd come to the party. She didn't say anything back. She was staring straight ahead and kinda leaning forward with a real serious look on her face. I could tell, all she was thinking about was the coke she wanted to score.
We drove out of town past the trailer court, past the big trucking company and sewer district, until we were out in the country surrounded by cornfields. Every mile or so, we'd pass a rundown shack or trailer falling off its blocks, each one looking worse than the one before. You can't even tell when you arrive in Minnith—it's so vacant; it just sort of creeps up on you. At a bend in the road, we saw this bar we were looking for, Angelo's, and found the street where we were supposed to turn. We turned left and drove through a dark neighborh
ood until we came to a little white church, if you could call it that. It was the smallest church I'd ever seen—more like prayer box. We saw some G's sitting out front on BMX bikes, and they nodded at us like they wanted us to pull over. When we turned corner, we knew we were at the right place—it was a big party.
We saw cars lining the street for two blocks and a lot of people standing outside on the sidewalks and in the street. As we drove close to the house, we got stuck behind a line of cars that were cruising real slow. People were coming up and talking to the people in the cars, and for a while, we just sat there not moving, checking shit out. The party looked ghetto, real ghetto, and we didn't see anyone our own age; they were all older. Now, I'd been to ghetto parties before, but this was Minnith—it was worse than Bethel—so I was a little nervous, and I could tell Lori was plain scared. She didn't wanna park and go inside, so instead she pulled up to where the people were standing around and rolled down her window.
We could see the folks on the sidewalk eyeing us, wondering what these two white girls wanted. Then a big guy in a leather jacket, sporting one of those old school hats and a lot of jewelry, came up to our car. With a big smile, he said, "Ladies, how you doing tonight? My name's Melvin." He stuck his hand in the car, and it looked about as big as Lori's head. Lori let go of the steering wheel and put her hand in his. When he shook her hand, he held onto it and asked, "What's your name?" Her voice sounded weak and scared as she told him her name, which kind of embarrassed me because he didn't seem like someone to be scared of. So I reached across the car and shook his hand and said, "Hi, I'm Macy."
"Macy, that's a pretty name."
Then Lori, her voice still shaking, asked him if he knew anyone who was selling coke. He laughed and said, "Oh, I knew there was some reason for you girls being in the hood. Well, I don't know anybody personally, but I'm sure I can find someone." Then he yelled at one of his friends, and some other guys came over to the car. They were all dressed real sharp, and the way they looked at us through the windows with their big, curious smiles made me feel like we should be asking for directions back to the highway or something—not "where can we get some coke?" They didn't know anybody personally, either, but they said if we were to go inside, there was bound to be someone selling. Other guys were coming around now and looking us over through the windows. Lori talked to them and said some names, but nobody knew any of the people she was asking about. Then we heard the car behind us honk, and Lori took her foot off the brake and drove abruptly forward, away from the crowd of guys. "Let's get out of here," she said.
I said, "You mean we drove all the way over here so you could talk to some guys out the window?"
She said, "Don't start with me, Macy," and I could tell she was getting in one of her moods. I didn't want her to snap on me when we were all the way over in Minnith because you never knew what she might do, so I kept my mouth shut. She was driving fast now, wearing a big frown on her face and staring straight ahead. I figured she was in a hurry to get back to Alley's so she could get drunk. She stopped at the Arab liquor store, which was on the way, and bought a bottle of vodka. She said it was for when the beer ran out.
When we got back to the party, we couldn't find a place to park in back, so we had to park in front of the strip mall and walk around. Halfway up the steps, we eased our way around a freshman girl who was throwing up over the railing. We could hardly squeeze through the back door because the apartment was so packed with people. Nobody was dancing anymore; there wasn't room, and the place smelled of vomit. There was a line for the keg and a line for the bathroom, and people were yelling through bathroom door to the people inside, saying, "Go outside if you have to puke." Cassidy Catrell and her friends were playing CDs on the stereo, but it was all pop, girly stuff. Every time they put something on, someone would yell across the room that it was weak and they wanted to hear some hard beats. I saw Makayla and her boyfriend, Bobby, standing in the corner. I went and said hi to them, then went looking for Alley.
In the kitchen, Tamiah and Caitlin were trying to play quarters with two guys I didn't know while everybody else stood around watching. Chelsea was laid out face-down on the kitchen counter, wasted. She had her eyes closed with her head resting on her folded arms, her knees were bent, and her feet were perched against the refrigerator. I asked someone, "Is she sleeping?"
Without opening her eyes, Chelsea drawled, "My stomach hurts, and I wanna keep my head close to the sink."
Then I saw Alley, looking mad as hell. She came up to me, grabbed me by the shoulders, and yelled in my face, "I want these people out of here! Those damn girls threw up on my floor, and they won't even clean it up."
I asked her, "You want me to start telling people to leave?"
She said, "Would you, please?" But I didn't have to because the keg ran out of beer, and a lot of people started clearing out.
The older crowd was the first to leave—the strip club bouncer fags and other people who nobody seemed to know. What was left were a lot of Lifegate kids, Lifegate dropouts like Keenan and Chad, and Keenan's brother, Dwayne, and a couple of his friends. Everyone was drunk and sweaty, stumbling around, talking about where they could get more alcohol. Lori had gotten her bottle of vodka out of the car and was making a drink for herself and telling everyone else they couldn't have any. Alley was huffing around the apartment picking up half drunk cups of beer and getting more and more angry as she surveyed the damage.
It'd gotten to the point that most parties get to where everyone is too drunk to have fun, but they haven't figured out yet that it's time to go home. I thought about how when Calvin and I were dating and the party would get like this, we'd get in his car, smoke a joint, and go have a different kind of party. I felt kind of bummed out and sad. I'd been feeling that way ever since Lori and I started driving back from Minnith. I guess I realized that all I had now were my friends, and sometimes they weren't much fun to hang out with. It's not that I was missing Calvin so much as I was missing having that someone you could go with when the party was over—someone besides Lori.
Caitlin and I were standing in the living room talking to Makayla and Bobby, who were, by far, the most sober people there. Makayla seemed real calm, like she does on those few occasions when she takes her ADD medicine. Bobby was acting real low-key as well, which was unusual. Makayla was telling us about her stepsister, who'd gotten pregnant, talking about how she was gonna help take care of the baby and how they hadn't decided yet what to name it. Bobby wasn't saying anything. He looked worried like he was thinking about something real hard. I noticed his eyes kept wandering around the room, and I began to wonder what was up with him. Then I saw Keenan, Chad, Trent, and some other guys all huddled up on the couch whispering and looking our way. I remember standing there listening to Makayla's voice, which sounded so calm and grown up, and feeling a strange sensation coming over me. It was like I had understanding, but I hadn't yet formed a picture in my mind or assigned any words to describe it. I felt caught between Makayla's words and some unformed thought, like a cat when they're confused and their ears start twisting in different directions.
Then I watched Keenan and the rest of them get off the couch and walk over to where we were standing. They had strange looks on their faces—sly smiles, or maybe what people call shit-eating grins. Then, all of a sudden, I got a sick feeling in my stomach because I knew what was gonna happen. I understood now, and it was bad. Trent said something to Bobby. He asked him a question, and as Bobby began answer, Trent stood there with a big smile on his face, nodding his head. And the way he stood there, smiling and nodding, I could tell he wasn't even listening to the answer. I wanted to do something. I wanted to jump in between them and stop it before it happened, but I knew there was no stopping these guys once they got an idea in their head. And then, like a flash, Trent hit Bobby in the face sending him stumbling backwards. In the same instant, Keenan, who was standing behind Bobby, hit him in the side of the head, and Bobby went down. Bobby tried to scramble back
up and away from the guys, but Keenan, Trent, Chad, and Jeff Shikes all jumped on Bobby and started punching and kicking him, knocking him back to the floor. Then other guys started coming across the room and jumping in like they knew it was gonna happen, like they were just waiting for a signal.
Makayla let out a high pitched scream and started jumping up and down with her hands in front of her face. Me and a bunch of other girls started yelling at the guys to get off Bobby. Then Chelsea, Alley, and Tamiah came running out of kitchen to do the same, but the guys just ignored us. We tried pulling some of the guys off of him, and right away, I got an elbow in the face. I jumped right back in there and started pulling on people, and the more we tried to break it up, the more the guys started pushing us away, and the more mad and aggressive us girls got. We started pulling hair, grabbing guys around the necks, double-teaming them, and doing whatever we could to get them off Bobby. Chelsea and I pulled Chad halfway across the room, but he just broke free and jumped back into the pile. Then Trent turned around and started pushing girls away, one at a time, yelling, "Get out of here, you fucking bitches." Chelsea, Alley, and I started swinging at Trent. He stepped backwards and tripped over the coffee table, and I kicked him in the stomach. He got up with a crazy look in his eyes and charged at me, and Chelsea and Alley grabbed his shirt and started clawing at his face until he pulled away.
The guys weren't letting up on Bobby. It seemed like every boy in the room was over there taking turns punching and kicking him and calling him names. You couldn't even see Bobby there were so many guys around him. And the way they were beating him, they were so serious about it, like they were taking part in some sort of ritual. Me and the other girls kept trying to stop them, and after a while, some of the guys backed off. Then I saw Trent punch Lori in the face and watched her fall down. I ran over with a clenched fist to hit Trent, but he punched me in the mouth first, which sent me backwards, and I landed on my ass. He was about to jump on me when Dwayne grabbed him from behind and carried him away. Then I saw Eric Cole, who was the only guy trying to break it up, fighting with Keenan. Eric tackled Keenan and tried to put him in a head lock, but Dwayne, who was a lot bigger than Eric, went over and picked Eric up and dropped him on his head. Eric held up his hands, signaling that he was done, and just sat there on the floor shaking his head.
Then it was over. People were still yelling, and girls were still pushing, but all the guys started grabbing their coats and heading out the door. They were leaving quick because I guess they were afraid the police might show up soon. The thing I remember, when I think about them hurrying out of the apartment, was that not one of them looked back at the lump of Bobby they left lying on the floor. Makayla was still screaming. It wasn't until my head cleared a little that I realized she'd been screaming the entire time. She was sitting in a chair having some kind of panic attack, holding her head in her hands, breathing real fast and rocking back and forth. I think she thought Bobby was dead, and my god, he looked dead. He was just laying there in a little pile, curled into a tight fetal position and not moving. Eric Cole went over, got down next to Bobby, and asked him if he was okay. He asked Bobby if he could hear him, saying, "Move your hand if you can hear me."
Bobby's face was covered with blood. It was in his hair and smudged all over his t-shirt. I stood there watching Eric and looking at Bobby, wondering if he was even alive. It was hard to look at him, but I made myself. His face was twisted, and it was hard to see where his eyes were because of all the blood. I thought I saw him move his arm, and as I watched him for a while longer, I could see him breathing. Then he mumbled something to Eric, and it came out all wet and gurgley. I didn't know what we should do, but Eric was acting like he knew and was checking Bobby over. Then all of a sudden, Bobby lifted his head and tried to get up, and Eric told him not to. Bobby struggled to his knees, but Eric put his arms around him and said, "Just lay back down, man," and Bobby did. Then Bobby started moaning and saying his head hurt.
I ran to the kitchen to get a towel, but I couldn't find one, so I ran to the bathroom, grabbed the first one I saw, and went back to the living room. Lori, Alley, and Tamiah were trying to calm down Makayla, who was sitting there with her eyes rolled back in her head, making whining sounds. I'd never seen anyone act like that before—it was like she'd checked out of reality and wasn't ready to come back in. Bobby was sitting up now, and Eric was talking to him, telling him not to move. I went back to the kitchen to look for ice, but there was none, so I got another towel from the bathroom and put cold water on it. Bobby's face was all fucked up, and as we started wiping the blood away, I could feel my stomach turning. He was bleeding from a lot of places, especially around his left eye, and there was a place on the side of his head where skin was hanging off. When he tried to talk, we found out he had a broken jaw, and that's when we decided to take him to the hospital.
Eric and a bunch of us girls got Bobby up and walked him down the steps to Eric's car. We put him in the front seat and went back up to get Makayla. She had calmed down some. Now she was just sobbing and blubbering, sitting there with her hands in her lap, staring at the carpet. I think if we hadn't helped her up and led her down the back steps, she would've sat there crying until she passed out from exhaustion. We put her in the back of Eric's car with Chelsea, and the four of them drove off.
Lori and I got in her car because we were going to follow them to the hospital. Then Lori remembered her vodka and ran back inside to get it. Once we got on the road, Lori decided she didn't want to go to the hospital—said she was too pissed off and that we wouldn't be any help, anyway. I didn't argue with her because I didn't feel like going to the hospital, either. We parked around the corner from Lori's house in a dark area away from the streetlamps and sat there smoking cigarettes and drinking the rest of her vodka. We drank a lot of vodka, chugged it right out of the bottle like we were trying to forget about what just happened. After about an hour, I called Chelsea on her cell phone. She told me they were at the hospital, and the nurses were working on Bobby. She said the police were there and asking questions, and that she and Eric had made up a lie. We only talked for about a minute because Chelsea wanted to get off the phone. They were gonna split before the police could ask them any more questions.
Lori got so drunk she was falling asleep right there in the car. All I wanted to do was go home. I wanted to go home, go to sleep, and not wake up for a long time. And the thought of sleeping on Lori's couch with all the dog hair and the smell kinda made me sick to my stomach because I was already imagining the hangover I was gonna have the next day. So I got out of the car, went around to the other side, and sort of rolled Lori over the console and into the passenger seat. I didn't have a license, but I didn't care. I drove as carefully as I could, trying to stay in the neighborhoods and off the main roads where there might be cops. By the time we got to my house, Lori was completely passed out and starting to snore. It took me twenty minutes of coaxing and dragging to get her out of the car, up the steps, through the front door, and finally, over to the couch where I let her collapse. Then I went to bed.