Produced by Sankar Viswanathan, Greg Weeks, and the OnlineDistributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net
Transcriber's Note:
This etext was produced from Analog Science Fact & Fiction November 1960, December 1960, January 1961, February 1961. Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that the U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.
OCCASION ... for DISASTER
By MARK PHILLIPS
Illustrated by van Dongen
_A very small slip, at just the wrong place, can devastate any enterprise. One tiny transistor can go wrong ... and ruin a multi-million dollar missile. Which would be one way to stop the missiles...._
"_We must remember not to judge any public servant by any one act, and especially should we beware of attacking the men who are merely the occasions and not the causes of disaster._"
Theodore Roosevelt
* * * * *
In 1914, it was enemy aliens.
In 1930, it was Wobblies.
In 1957, it was fellow-travelers.
In 1971, it was insane telepaths.
And, in 1973:
"We don't know _what_ it is," said Andrew J. Burris, Director of theFBI. He threw his hands in the air and looked baffled and confused.
Kenneth J. Malone tried to appear sympathetic. "What what is?"
Burris frowned and drummed his fingers on his big desk. "Malone," hesaid, "make sense. And don't stutter."
"Stutter?" Malone said. "You said you didn't know what it was. And Iwanted to know what it was."
"That's just it," Burris said. "I don't know."
Malone sighed and repressed an impulse to scream. "Now, wait a minute,Chief--" he started.
Burris frowned again. "Don't call me Chief," he said.
Malone nodded, "O.K.," he said. "But--if you don't know what it is,you must have some idea of what you don't know. I mean, is it largerthan a breadbox? Does it perform helpful tasks? Is it self-employed?"
"Malone," Burris sighed, "you ought to be on television."
"But--"
"Let me explain," Burris said. His voice was calmer now, and he spokeas if he were enunciating nothing but the most obvious and eternaltruths. "The country," he said, "is going to Hell in a handbasket."
Malone nodded again. "Well, after all, Chief--" he started.
"Don't call me Chief," Burris said wearily.
"Anything you say," Malone agreed peacefully. He eyed the Director ofthe FBI warily. "After all, it isn't anything new," he went on. "Thecountry's always been going to Hell in a handbasket, one way oranother. Look at Rome."
"Rome?" Burris said.
"Sure," Malone said. "Rome was always going to Hell in a handbasket,and finally it--" He paused. "Finally it did, I guess," he said.
"Exactly," Burris said. "And so are we. Finally." He passed a handover his forehead and stared past Malone at a spot on the wall. Maloneturned and looked at the spot, but saw nothing of interest. "Malone,"Burris said, and the FBI Agent whirled around again.
"Yes, Ch--Yes?" he said.
"This time," Burris said, "it isn't the same old story at all. Thistime it's different."
"Different?" Malone said.
Burris nodded. "Look at it this way," he said. His eyes returned tothe FBI Agent. "Suppose you're a congressman," he went on, "and youfind evidence of inefficiency in the government."
"All right," Malone said agreeably. He had the feeling that if hewaited around a little while everything would make sense, and he waswilling to wait. After all, he wasn't on assignment at the moment, andthere was nothing pressing waiting for him. He was even betweenromances.
If he waited long enough, he told himself, Andrew J. Burris might saysomething worth hearing. He looked attentive and eager. He consideredleaning over the desk a little, to look even more eager, but decidedagainst it; Burris might think he looked threatening. There was notelling.
"You're a congressman," Burris said, "and the government isinefficient. You find evidence of it. What do you do?"
* * * * *
Malone blinked and thought for a second. It didn't take any longerthan that to come up with the old, old answer. "I start aninvestigation," he said. "I get a committee and I talk to a lot ofnewspaper editors and magazine editors and maybe I go on televisionand talk some more, and my committee has a lot of meetings--"
"Exactly," Burris said.
"And we talk a lot at the meetings," Malone went on, carried away,"and get a lot of publicity, and we subpoena famous people, just asfamous as we can get, except governors or presidents, because youcan't--they tried that back in the '50s, and it didn't work verywell--and that gives us some more publicity, and then when we have allthe publicity we can possibly get--"
"You stop," Burris said hurriedly.
"That's right," Malone said. "We stop. And that's what I'd do."
"Of course, the problem of inefficiency is left exactly where italways was," Burris said. "Nothing's been done about it."
"Naturally," Malone said. "But think of all the lovely publicity. Andall the nice talk. And the subpoenas and committees and everything."
"Sure," Burris said wearily. "It's happened a thousand times. But,Malone, that's the difference. It isn't happening this time."
There was a short pause. "What do you mean?" Malone said at last.
"This time," Burris said, in a tone that sounded almost awed, "theywant to keep it a secret."
"A secret?" Malone said, blinking. "But that's ... that's not theAmerican way."
Burris shrugged. "It's un-congressman-like, anyhow," he said. "Butthat's what they've done. Tiptoed over to me and whispered softly thatthe thing has to be investigated quietly. Naturally, they didn't giveme any orders--but only because they know they can't make one stick.They suggested it pretty strongly."
"Any reasons?" Malone said. The whole idea interested him strangely.It was odd--and he found himself almost liking odd cases, lately. Thatis, he amended hurriedly, if they didn't get _too_ odd.
"Oh, they had reasons, all right," Burris said. "It took a littlecoaxing, but I managed to pry some loose. You see, every one of themfound inefficiency in his own department. And every one knows thatother men are investigating inefficiency."
"Oh," Malone said.
"That's right," Burris said. "Every one of them came to me to get meto prove that the goof-ups in his particular department weren't hisfault. That covers them in case one of the others happens to lightinto the department."
"Well, it must be _somebody's_ fault," Malone said.
"It isn't theirs," Burris said wearily. "I ought to know. They toldme. At great length, Malone."
Malone felt a stab of honest pity. "How many so far?" he said.
"Six," Burris said. "Four representatives, and two senators."
"Only two?" Malone said.
"Well," Burris said, "the Senate is so much smaller. And, besides, wemay get more. As a matter of fact, Senator Lefferts is worth any sixrepresentatives all by himself."
"He is?" Malone said, puzzled. Senator Lefferts was not one of hisfavorite people. Nor, as far as he knew, did the somewhat excitablesenator hold any place of honor in the heart of Andrew J. Burris.
"I mean his story," Burris said. "I've never heard anything likeit--at least, not since the Bilbo days. And I've only heard aboutthose," he added hurriedly.
"What story?" Malone said. "He talked about inefficiency--"
"Not exactly," Burris said carefully. "He said that somebody was outto get him--him, personally. He said somebod
y was trying to discredithim by sabotaging all his legislative plans."
"Well," Malone said, feeling that some comment was called for, "threecheers."
"That isn't the point," Burris snapped. "No matter how we felt aboutSenator Lefferts or his legislative plans, we're sworn to protect him.And he says