Page 8 of Defense


  “I’m on the pill,” I answered without thinking twice about it.

  “I’ll use a condom if you want, but I prefer not to. Not with you.” His hand softly stroked my cheek. “And if you’re worried about me not being clean, don’t be. I can assure you that this is something I don’t make a habit of.”

  “It’s fine,” I whispered. “I trust you.”

  His lips tangled with mine as he thrust inside me, until every inch of him was buried deep. Several moans escaped me as did the whispers of his pleasure escape him. He thrust in and out of me, skin to skin in all its naturalness. Glorifying, powerful, and completely controlled. We fucked for what seemed like hours and in various positions. Some were new to me and some I didn’t care for before, but with him, I enjoyed it. He took my body to a level I never knew existed.

  His movements began to slow after I orgasmed for the second time and then he halted, hovering over me and straining to pour every last drop he had inside me. My heart was racing and I was left breathless. He lowered his head while still buried deep within me and softly kissed my lips. It was at that very moment that I felt something; something more than just a connection. He climbed off me and fell on his back, extending his arm and motioning for me to snuggle against him.

  “That was incredible,” he spoke as my head lay on his chest.

  “It definitely was.”

  “The other night when you called me, you sounded off and upset. What happened?”

  I sighed as I tightened my arm around him. Just because we had slept together didn’t mean that I would tell him my life story.

  “Olivia told me that Julia called and asked if she had heard from me.”

  “Julia’s your sister, right?”

  I swallowed hard and nodded my head.

  “Did Olivia lie to her?” he asked.

  “Yes.”

  “Your family is obviously worried about you.”

  “I know. Now that I’m settled here and I’ll be taking the bar in a few days, I can start over. A brand new life where I’m the only one I have to worry about,” I spoke as I sat up and brought my knees to my chest.

  Luca sat up behind me and softly kissed my bare shoulder.

  “You’ll tell me all about it in time.”

  He climbed off the bed, grabbed my clothes from the floor, and handed them to me.

  “Get dressed and we’ll go grab some lunch. I’ve seemed to work up quite an appetite.” He smirked.

  “I have to unpack.”

  “Well, since you only have two suitcases, I’d imagine it won’t take you very long. You can do it after lunch.”

  “Are you always so damn bossy?” I arched my brow at him.

  “Yes.” He smiled.

  “Well, just so you know,” I pulled my shirt over my head, “I don’t tend to listen very well so I’m going to unpack first, and when I’m finished, then we’ll go to lunch.”

  He stood there and took the corner of his bottom lip between his teeth.

  “I’ll tell you what. We’ll compromise. You start to unpack and I’ll go to the deli around the corner and pick us up a couple of sandwiches and we’ll eat here. Then, later tonight, we’ll go out for a nice dinner.”

  “That sounds like a good plan.”

  “What kind of sandwich do you want?” he asked.

  “Corned beef and Swiss on rye with mustard on the side.”

  “Hmm. That sounds good. I think I’ll get the same.” He winked. “I’ll be back in a flash.”

  Chapter Seventeen

  Ariana

  Luca left to go get lunch and I walked around my apartment and examined my new furniture. I was speechless at the fact that he bought all of it for me. A part of me was grateful beyond words, but the other half of me was upset, disoriented, and confused. Why would he do it? How was I ever going to pay him back?

  I picked up my phone from the counter and closed my eyes for a moment while I took in a deep breath. As much as I didn’t want to make the call, I had to. It was something I needed to do and then move on with the rest of my life. New apartment, new job, new beginnings. Bringing my phone up to my ear, my heart started pounding when I heard her voice on the other end.

  “Hello.”

  “It’s me,” I spoke in a flat tone.

  “Ariana?”

  “Yes.”

  “We’ve been so worried about you. Did Olivia tell you I called her?”

  I knew what she was doing and I needed to be careful.

  “No. I didn’t know you got in touch with Olivia. I just called to let you know that I’m okay. I’m safe and there’s no need for you to worry.”

  “Please tell me where you’re at. I promise I won’t try to come see you. I just need to know.”

  “Really? You just need to know? What about the things I needed to know?”

  “Ari, please. We need to talk. Please just give me a chance to make things right.”

  “You could have made things right years ago, but instead you decided not to tell me the truth. You all lied to me for twenty-five years,” I shouted uncontrollably. “Do you have any idea how that made me feel? How much you betrayed me?”

  “Please, Ari. I’m so sorry.”

  “Sorry that I found out? Anyway, I have to go. I only made this call so I could move on with my life. I’m putting the past to rest and I’m moving forward on my own. I suggest you and the rest of the family do the same.” Tears filled my eyes as I ended the call.

  I threw my phone down on the couch and, before I knew it, I felt two arms wrap around me.

  “Are you all right?” Luca asked.

  “I will be.” I wiped the tears from my eyes.

  “If you don’t want to be found, I hope you blocked your number.”

  “I did.”

  “Smart girl.” He smiled as he turned me around and kissed my forehead. “Let’s eat. Shall we?”

  As we were eating, there was a knock at the door. Giving Luca a confused look, I got up and answered it. Standing in the hallway was a tall thin man with a dolly that housed a very large brown box.

  “Ah, Yemin, thank you.” Luca smiled as he approached the door. “Just bring the box over here to the living room.” He pointed.

  “Now what did you do?” I cocked my head at him.

  Luca winked at me and then pulled some cash out of his pocket and handed it to Yemin. As soon as he shut the door, he sat back down at the table to finish his sandwich.

  “Luca? What is in the box?”

  “Why don’t you go open it and find out?”

  I sighed as I walked over to the box and ripped the tape off the top.

  “What is all this?” I reached in the box and pulled out a book.

  “Everything you need to study for the bar exam. You only have a few days, Ariana. Which to me is a ridiculously low amount of time. Law students usually spend months prepping for that exam. I know I did.”

  I couldn’t help but smile.

  “Thank you.”

  “You’re welcome. They’re on loan, so after your exam, I’ll arrange for someone to come pick them up.”

  After making love for the second time, we got dressed and went out for a nice dinner. After dinner was over, Luca dropped me off at my apartment.

  “Aren’t you coming up?” I asked as we stood outside my building.

  He brought his hand to my cheek.

  “No. Your study time officially starts now. The only thing I want you thinking about is the law.”

  “Do I have to?” I pouted.

  “Yes. Your future depends on it.” He smiled as his lips brushed against mine. “Now get upstairs and crack open the books. I’ll be in touch.”

  “Yes, sir!” I saluted him.

  When I walked into my apartment and turned on the lights, I took in a deep breath. I couldn’t stop thinking about sex with Luca and how he made me feel. It was something I had never felt before, not even with Harry. He was charming and irresistible and he knew it. Was I just another notch in his b
elt? I’d hoped not because I’d already fallen for him. As much as I tried to stop myself, I couldn’t help it.

  ****

  Luca

  After I dropped Ariana off at her apartment, I headed to Clement inside the Grammercy Hotel and took a seat at the bar.

  “Good evening, Mr. Russo. The usual?” Harvey, the bartender, asked.

  “Good evening, Harvey. Yes, the usual will be fine.”

  I picked up my double scotch and threw it back as if it was a glass of water. What happened to me after I fucked Ariana was unexplainable. My initial attraction to her was strong. Stronger than anything I’d ever felt before. But after today, the intensity of it terrified the fuck out of me. I knew she felt something for me. I could see it in her eyes and I felt it in the way she kissed me. Women fell for me all the time, no big deal. But with Ariana, it was a big deal. The biggest deal of my life because I had fallen for her.

  “Give me another, Harvey.” I set my glass down.

  “Coming right up, sir.”

  I took a sip of my second drink. With my hands tightly clasped around the glass, I knew what I had to do. I had to protect her. Protect her from me, my past, and the things I’d done. I cared deeply for her, possibly even loved her, and that was more than enough reason for me to have to let her go.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Ariana

  I’d spent the last few days locked up in my apartment studying for the bar exam. I hadn’t heard from Luca at all and that bothered me. I had sent him a few text messages, only to go unanswered. I was worried about him, so I called Olivia.

  “Shouldn’t you be studying for the bar?” she answered in her perky voice.

  “Have you seen Luca?” I asked.

  “Of course. I see him every day at work. Why?”

  “I haven’t heard from him since Sunday after he dropped me off. I sent him a few text messages and he never texted me back.”

  “That’s odd. I know he’s been busy with court and some new cases that came in this week. Maybe he’s just keeping his distance so you can focus on your studies.”

  “Yeah, maybe you’re right.”

  “Good luck tomorrow,” she spoke. “I know you’ll ace it.”

  “Thanks, Olivia. I’ll talk to you soon.”

  Something wasn’t sitting right with me. It was a feeling I had in the pit of my stomach. I missed him and I wanted to see him, so I tried one last time.

  “I’m going to Dooley’s for a drink at seven o’clock. I’m hoping you’ll meet me there. I really need to calm my nerves before tomorrow.”

  The truth was I wasn’t nervous at all about taking the bar. It was the only thing in my life at the moment that I was confident about. I waited for a response and one never came. Maybe he was in a meeting and hadn’t seen it yet. Maybe he was on the phone, or maybe he was just flat out ignoring me for some fucking reason. I grabbed my purse and headed to Dooley’s. He’d meet me there, I was sure of it. After everything he’d done for me, he wouldn’t not wish me luck.

  “What can I get you, Miss?” a hot young male bartender named Kevin asked.

  “Vodka on the rocks. Make it a double, please.”

  “Tough day?” he asked with a smile as he poured the vodka with finesse into the glass.

  “Tough week. I’ve been studying for the bar exam that I’m taking tomorrow.” I smiled.

  “Ah. Good for you. Good luck.”

  “Thanks.”

  I sat there with my phone on the bar, sipping my drink, waiting for Luca to either call, text, or show up. An hour and a half had passed and still I heard nothing from him.

  “Can I get you anything else?” Kevin asked.

  I pulled my credit card from my wallet and handed it to him.

  “Just cash me out.”

  It was a beautiful night out and my apartment was only a couple of blocks away, so I decided just to walk home instead of taking a cab. I was hurt and on the verge of tears at the fact that he couldn’t bother to show up at Dooley’s or that he couldn’t be bothered to text me back. I walked past his building on the way to mine and saw Emil standing outside holding the door open for someone as they brought in some packages.

  “Hi, Emil.” I waved as I walked by.

  “Ariana, wait! How are you?”

  “I’m okay. How are you?” I asked as I turned around.

  “I’m good. I haven’t seen you around in a while.”

  “I’ve been busy studying for the bar exam.”

  “Oh wow. I didn’t know you were a lawyer.”

  “Almost.” I smiled. “Hey, is Luca home by any chance?”

  “I don’t think so. I haven’t seen him.”

  “Oh. Okay. Well, I better get home. Only a few more hours left for studying.”

  Just as I turned around, I saw Luca climbing out of his Bentley. Shit. I quickly turned the opposite way and ran right into Brad. Double shit.

  “Hello there, Ariana.” He smiled brightly.

  “Brad.” I nodded. “Excuse me, but I have to get home,” I spoke in a panicked voice.

  “Ariana.” I heard Luca’s voice from behind.

  I could feel my rapid heart beating faster by the second. I swallowed hard before I turned around to face the man that I hadn’t heard from in three days. The same man who stood me up tonight. Suddenly, out of nowhere, an anger rose inside me.

  “Luca. Did you get my text messages?”

  He cleared his throat before answering.

  “Yes. I’ve just been really busy.”

  “Too busy to take five seconds to let me know that you wouldn’t be able to make it to the bar?”

  “I’ve been in back to back meetings all day and in court.”

  “Okay.” I lightly nodded with a smug tone. “I have to go.”

  “Good luck tomorrow.”

  I stuck my middle finger up at him as I walked away. An involuntary gesture that I simply had no control over. I could still hear Brad’s laughter as I turned the corner. The moment I stepped into my apartment, I lost it. The tears I had been fighting flooded my eyes as I curled up on the couch into a ball and cried myself to sleep.

  I slowly opened my swollen eyes, and for a brief moment, I felt disoriented. Realizing that it was the middle of the night, I dragged my ass off the couch and reached into my purse to get my phone to check the time. It was one thirty in the morning. Walking into the bathroom and flipping on the light, I washed my face, changed into my nightshirt, set my alarm on my phone, and then climbed into bed. My stomach was a knotted mess. It was as though he was a totally different man. A man whom I didn’t like very much at the moment.

  ****

  The first part of the exam was over and it was time to break for lunch. Grabbing my purse, I headed to a small café down the street for a sandwich and much needed coffee. I had approximately an hour and fifteen minutes to myself before heading back and taking the second part of the exam. I pulled my phone out of my purse and noticed a text message from Olivia.

  “How did it go? Did you survive the first part? Was it hard? Was it excruciating? I need details!”

  I couldn’t help but smile as I dialed her number.

  “So, how did it go?” she asked as she answered.

  “Piece of cake.”

  “You’re weird, Ari. Have you by any chance talked to Luca?” she asked.

  “No. Why?”

  “He’s in a foul mood today. Like a woman with severe PMS.”

  “Glad I’m not there.”

  “Any idea what his problem could be?”

  “No. Sorry, I don’t. Listen, I have to go. I’ll call you soon.”

  I ended the call and held the white round coffee cup between my hands. Maybe his mood had something to do with me flipping him off yesterday. After finishing off my sandwich, I headed back to take the second half of the bar exam.

  ****

  Luca

  I thought about her all day and I wondered how her exam went. Today was the last day and David told me th
at she would find out her results on Tuesday at the latest. The night I ran into her outside my building, she was pissed and I didn’t blame her. She had every reason to be. All the things I had done for her, I did because I wanted to. Why I wanted to I had no clue. I’d never done anything like what I did for her before. I needed to explain to her that things would never work out for us. If we talked like two adults, then maybe things at the office wouldn’t be awkward. What the fuck did I do?

  It was Sunday and on the way home from visiting my grandfather, I stopped by Ariana’s apartment. Taking in a deep breath, I knocked on the door. Hell, I didn’t even know if she was home or not. I stood there, my nerves getting the best of me as I patiently waited. Then, I heard the deadbolt unlock and the door opened.

  “What are you doing here, Luca?” she asked in a stern voice.

  “I need to talk to you.”

  “I have nothing to say to you.” She went to shut the door and I stopped it with my hand.

  “Ariana, we need to talk,” I spoke in an authoritative tone.

  “Fine. Come on in.” She waved her hand and sighed.

  I stepped inside her apartment and she immediately went and sat down on the couch. After shutting the door behind me, I approached her.

  “How did the exam go?”

  “It went fine.” She refused to look at me.

  “Listen, Ariana, I’m sorry.”

  “I’m sure you are. It seems that everyone in my life is sorry when they hurt me.”

  “Not fair.” I shook my head.

  “Luca,” she got up from the couch, “what do you want? Why did you come here? I don’t hear from you for a week and now you think you can just waltz into my apartment and think that I even want to talk to you?”

  “I know you’re pissed off and I’m sorry about that. There’s some things I need to say.”

  “Then by all means, say them.” She threw her hands in the air as she walked to the kitchen and pulled a bottle of wine from the refrigerator.

  “I like you, Ariana. I really do. But things could never work out for us.”

  She pulled a glass down from the cabinet, poured some wine into it, and took a sip before speaking.