“Don’t put it in all the way then,” I said, stroking his broad, muscular chest and abs. “Why not just put…I don’t know, an inch in. Just a little at a time to build the power. I…I don’t think I can come without you in me—at least a little bit,” I added. “I don’t know why, it’s just…just a feeling I have.”
“Well, you know your own body best, darlin’.” Grav frowned. “All right. But just a little at a time. I don’t know what an ‘inch’ is though—is that an Earth measurement?”
“It’s about like this…” I held my finger and thumb a little way apart to show him.
“All right.” He nodded. “Just an inch then—we’ll start with the head.”
“Just the head,” I agree breathlessly and spread my legs wider in anticipation.
“You’re eager, aren’t you?” Grav’s eyes were half-lidded with lust.
“I can’t help it,” I said honestly. “I…I need you, Grav.”
“Need you too, darlin’—so fuckin’ bad. But I don’t want to hurt you. Here…”
His hips shifted and I felt the broad, plum-shaped head finally push all the way inside me, past my pussy lips and into my channel.
Grav and I both groaned and I felt myself squeeze him involuntarily, my inner pussy stroking and massaging the thick invader.
“Gods, you’re tight,” he murmured, his hands still gripping my hips.
“It’s just that you’re so big,” I said. “I…I’ve never been with anyone your size.”
“Haven’t been with anyone your size either,” he admitted, grinning a little. “You Earth girls are so itty-bitty.”
“I am not ‘itty-bitty,’ I’m considered plus-sized on my planet,” I reminded him. “And I won’t break.”
“Not even if I do…this?”
With a slow roll of his hips, he thrust more of that long, thick shaft inside me. I moaned and spread my thighs even wider, trying to be open enough to take him.
“No,” I whispered. “You…you can’t break me that way. Although you can make me completely crazy. Grav, I feel the power—I feel it growing. I just need more.”
“How much more?” he asked, frowning. “How much will it take to give you what you need, darlin’?”
“All of it,” I said recklessly. “All of you, Grav. I need you all the way inside me.”
“Gods, Leah…” he groaned and then shut his eyes tight for a moment. When he opened them and looked up at me, I could see that the red spark burning in the back of them had grown.
“What is it?” I asked him. “Is it too much to ask?”
“No…” He shifted under me restlessly, making me give a little cry from the pleasurable friction. “This is the point of no return, darlin’. If I do this, if I thrust my cock all the way into your sweet pussy, I won’t be able to stop. So this is it, right here. If you want me to stop, say so because I can’t after this. I can’t.”
“Grav, please…” I tugged at one of his horns restlessly. “I don’t want you to stop,” I told him.
He gave a low groan that sounded like a man finally admitting defeat. Then he gripped my hips and with one long thrust, pushed the rest of his thick shaft all the way into me.
I moaned and gasped, loving the feeling of him stretching me to the limit. I could feel my inner walls opening to accommodate him, could feel the broad head of his cock deep inside me, kissing the end of my channel.
And then Grav flipped me over while somehow staying deep inside me.
I gasped at the sudden change of position. He had me pinned to the bed now, completely open for him, utterly penetrated and totally at his mercy.
It was the scariest situation I’d ever been in…and also the hottest.
I tried to say something but I could tell that even if I could get the words out, he wouldn’t understand me. The beast inside him had taken over—the red pinprick in the back of each eye had grown until it devoured his pupils and irises. Instead of white-on-black, his eyes were red-on-black now and they were filled with pure, animal lust.
I was in for a wild ride.
“Grav!” I moaned as he pulled out of me and then plunged back in, his thick shaft stretching me to the limit as the head of his cock gave the mouth of my womb a deep, hard kiss. “Oh God…Grav!”
His only answer was more deep, hard thrusting. I moaned and opened myself to him—what else could I do? I was pinned to the bed, my legs spread wide, my pussy completely penetrated and filled by his big, alien cock. He had said that he wanted to own me and now I knew this was what it felt like. Grav wasn’t just making love to me or fucking me—he was breeding me. Owning me. And I knew it wouldn’t be over until he filled me with his cum and I came along with him, all over his invading shaft.
The deep delicious thrusting seemed to go on forever. I wrapped my legs around his waist and cried his name again and again, scratching long furrows down his muscular back. I could feel my pleasure and my power both building to a peak. I couldn’t stop either one—nor did I want to. I was getting close…so close, if I could just have a little more stimulation…
Just then, Grav took another position. Grabbing my legs, he drew them up over his broad shoulders. I gasped as the new angle opened me even more and moaned as I felt his pelvis grinding against mine, pressing right against my swollen clit.
It was too much…and just enough. With a low moan I felt myself reaching the peak at last. My back arched, my toes curled, and I found that I was somehow holding onto his horns, dragging him down for a wild, hungry kiss as he pounded into me, marking me as his, claiming me completely.
“Grav!” I gasped as my orgasm finally hit, rolling over me like a tidal wave. “Oh God—yes! Grav!”
He must have felt my inner muscles contract around him because with a low roar, he pressed deep inside me and allowed my orgasm to trigger his own. I felt his thick shaft swell even thicker inside me and then something hot was filling me as spurt after spurt of his seed bathed the mouth of my womb, marking me as his in no uncertain terms.
Yes, I thought. Oh, yes…yes…yes!
Chapter Thirty
Leah
I had never felt anything like it—the intense feeling of being opened and penetrated and owned and the incredible rush of pleasure that came with it. I never wanted it to end.
At last, however, Grav pulled me close and rolled us over again so that I was lying on top of his broad chest, his shaft still half-buried in my pussy.
He was breathing deeply, his massive chest rising and falling like a bellows. I nuzzled against him, feeling warm and close and safe in a way I never had after sex before. It was so good…so right.
And so different from sex with Gerald. After sex with my ex—because that was how I thought of him now, even though I had yet to serve him with divorce papers—I only wanted it to be over. Only wanted to get away from the invasive feeling of having someone else inside me so I could clean myself up.
It wasn’t like that with Grav. I wanted to keep cuddling with him, cradled on his broad chest with his muscular arms around me. I didn’t even mind that his still-hard shaft was still piercing my pussy. In fact, I kind of liked it. I was all worn out from the incredible orgasm—so tired I almost thought I could fall asleep.
Then I heard Grav call my name.
“Leah? Darlin’?”
“Mmm?” I looked up and saw he was looking down at me anxiously, a worried look in his white-on-black eyes. Because they were white-on-black again. The berserker red had faded, leaving him looking like his old, normal self.
“Are…are you okay?” He stroked the hair away from my face. “I mean, did I hurt you?”
“Uh-uh.” I shook my head and gave him a dreamy smile. “Actually, I feel incredible.”
An incredulous little smile darted across his sensuous mouth.
“You liked it, did you?”
“I loved it,” I assured him. “Grav, that was hands-down the best sex I have ever had.”
He was
quiet for a moment, concentrating on my face but I couldn’t tell why. At last he said,
“Do you feel anything?”
“The power you mean?” I stretched languidly, feeling a tingling that ran from my fingers all the way down to my toes. “Oh yeah—I feel all charged up now. I’m sure healing Teeny won’t be a problem.”
“That’s wonderful, darlin’,” he rumbled. “But…that’s not what I mean. I mean do you feel anything from me?”
“Oh…Oh.” Suddenly I understood what he meant. I sat up, which pushed more of his still-hard length inside me. We both made little sounds of pleasure but I refused to let myself be distracted by it. Instead, I looked at Grav, concentrating hard, trying to see if I could pick up any of his thoughts or emotions. I tried my best to “tune in” on him, the way Zoe had told me she was able to tune in on her mate, Sarden.
Nothing.
I wanted to cry. Because when I looked at Grav, I could tell he was having the same experience. As much as we wanted to, we couldn’t catch each other’s emotions or thoughts.
Despite the incredibly intense sex, we hadn’t bonded.
“I…I’m sorry,” I whispered, biting my lip. “I want to be bonded to you, Grav—I want to feel what you feel, want to have that connection but, well…it’s not there.”
He sighed. “For me either, darlin’. I can’t feel a damn thing from you.”
“Does it really matter so much?” I asked, pleadingly. “Do we have to be bonded? We don’t bond on Earth, you know, and lots of people still make happy marriages together.”
“Like you and your mate you mean?” he growled.
The sarcasm in his words hurt—I felt like he’d punched me.
“That’s not fair and you know it,” I said softly.
“I’m sorry.” He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “That was a fucked-up thing to say. It’s just…without a bond, this won’t work. Not for me, anyway. Look what happened to my parents.”
“Do you really think we’d end up like them?” I asked. “Because I don’t. I’m not afraid of you, Grav, even though you’re the biggest guy I’ve ever seen. I know you’d never hurt me.”
“No, but you’d never be completely sure of me either,” he said, frowning. “You’d never know the deepest part of my heart—the way I’d never know the deepest part of yours. After a while it would hurt us—drive us apart. I’ve seen it happen, Leah. Not just with my parents, with other couples of the Twelve Peoples who tried to make it without a bond. Because it just doesn’t work. Not in the long run.”
“So that’s it? It’s all over?” I pulled away from him and sat on the edge of the bed. Wrapping my arms around myself, I tried not to cry.
“I’m sorry, darlin’,” he rumbled. “So damn sorry.”
I didn’t want to give up. Despite the finality in his eyes, I wanted to try one more time. I looked up at him, putting my heart into my eyes.
“Grav, please, I…I love you. And I don’t have to feel your emotions to know you care for me too. Can’t that be enough?”
His strange, beautiful, alien eyes were filled with sorrow when he shook his head.
“I’m sorry, Leah—no. It’s not enough. Please believe me—I’m tryin’ to save you a heartache in the long run.”
“Really?” I said icily, my hurt feelings turning from sorrow to anger. “Because it seems to me you’re trying to save yourself one.”
I got off the bed and started pulling on my clothes. Grav watched me, frowning.
“Where are you going?”
“To heal Teeny. That was the point of all this, in case you forgot,” I snapped. “Not to try and achieve some ridiculous, unattainable relationship goal. Just to heal a sick little girl.”
“It’s not unattainable,” he growled. “It’s necessary for a healthy, long-term—”
“Oh, just shut up!” I exclaimed. “If you don’t want to be with me, just say so. You don’t have to make excuses.”
“Is that what you think?” He was out of the bed in an instant and taking me by the shoulders. “Leah, I want you more than any female I’ve ever seen. The minute I saw your beautiful image on the AMI light screen, you were all I could think about. I do want to be with you—so much it fuckin’ hurts.”
“But you won’t,” I said, knowing it was true.
“No.” He dropped his hands and sighed. “No, I won’t.”
“All right, then.” I took a deep breath and ran both hands through my hair, trying to get hold of myself. This wasn’t like me, all this snapping and sarcasm. No matter what happened or how much he hurt me, I wanted to carry myself with dignity and grace.
“Leah,” he began but I held up a hand to stop him.
“I’m going now,” I said. “I want to heal Teeny and then I want to get some sleep. I’m really tired right now.”
“All right.” He looked down at his hands. “Uh…maybe you’d prefer me to change the hopper’s course and take you back to Earth before I drop off Teeny?”
“Just can’t wait to get rid of me, huh?” I said, forgetting my promise to myself not to be sarcastic.
“Leah—” His deep voice was anguished but I refused to let it melt me.
“No, no—don’t say anything.” I shook my head. “Actually, I think that’s a really good idea. If Teeny’s grandfather doesn’t mind.”
“Earth is actually kind of on the way,” he rumbled. “So it shouldn’t be a problem.”
“Well then by all means, please do change the course.” I drew the shreds of my dignity around me and lifted my chin. “I’ll be happy to go home a little early. I have a lot of things to take care of.”
“Fine.” His features hardened like granite. “I’ll change the course.”
“Thank you.” I turned to go but he called me back.
“Leah…I’m sorry.”
“Not sorry enough,” I said and left the room.
Grav
The rest of the trip to Earth was a fuckin’ nightmare—mostly because I was so miserable I could hardly function. Part of me thought I was a fool, letting the perfect female slip through my fingers—letting the only female I had ever loved go. But there was a little voice at the back of my head, a nagging little whisper that wouldn’t shut up.
It’s better this way—it’s the only way, that little voice told me. You don’t want to condemn Leah to a loveless joining, do you? Oh sure, it would be fine for a while but then the doubts set in, the wondering what the other person is really feeling, the jealousy over the fact that all her friends are bonded to their mates and she can’t have that. No, it’s better to let her go—she was too good for you anyway, Grav. Let her be free to find a mate she can bond with. One that’s not a murderer and an escaped con. Just let her go.
I couldn’t ignore that little voice—or deny the truth of what it was saying. It was better to let Leah go, I told myself, even as my heart ached for her. It was better for both of us but especially for her. I was a hybrid—not meant for that special love that others felt. And I couldn’t condemn Leah to a life without it just because I was unable to bond with her.
So I kept telling myself as my hopper made its way through the galaxy to the small blue and green planet Leah called home.
Leah healed Teeny—completely this time, without even a trace of the Biter’s mark left on her arm—and the two of them spent most of their time together. I could see that Teeny was growing attached to my little Earth female—well, not mine anymore but still, I couldn’t help feeling possessive of her. And Leah, for her part, treated Teeny like a daughter or a beloved, much younger sister. It was clearly an affection that both of them needed and I thought sadly that when we dropped Leah off it would hurt Teeny almost as much as it hurt me to say goodbye.
To me, Leah was extremely polite and distant, as if we were acquaintances who barely knew each other. It hurt but I didn’t complain about it. After all, I understood why she was doing it—she was hurting too and I
was the cause of her pain. This whole fucked-up situation was all my fault and yet I didn’t know how to solve it…how to make it better.
Almost before I knew it, the Earth was hovering in my viewscreen. And then I saw the Commercian’s station, carefully camouflaged amongst the space junk floating around the little planet. I shook my head—it was a pity they didn’t take better care of what the Goddess had given them. But then again, if they had, I never would have met Leah.
“Is that it? Is that Leah’s home planet?” Teeny asked in my ear.
“Uh, yeah. Yeah it is.” I heaved a big sigh and nodded at her.
“Grav…” She put one little hand on my arm, looking up at me. “Can’t you two, I don’t know, make up somehow?”
“I wish we could, Teeny,” I said. “But it’s complicated.”
“What’s complicated?” Leah came into the control area, apparently looking for Teeny. “Oh…” She caught sight of the Earth spinning in space before us. “I…I can’t believe we’re finally here.”
“Yup.” I heaved a sigh and set the ship’s coordinates to stay in orbit around the far side of the Earth’s small moon so the humans wouldn’t detect it. “Come on—we’ll have to take the second best shuttle. It’s going to be crowded.”
“So that’s it—we’re going? I mean…you’re going to drop me off and leave me? Just like that?” Leah’s big brown eyes were bright with unshed tears. But what could I do?
“Best not to drag it out,” I growled. “Get your stuff. I’ll go prepare the shuttle.”
As I walked past them, Teeny rushed to Leah and threw her skinny little arms around her.
“Leah…Leah…” She was crying. “I don’t want you to go!”
“I don’t want to go either,” I heard Leah say. “But we don’t always get what we want, Teeny. I’m so sorry.”
Gods, this was fucking unbearable. I quickened my step as I headed for the shuttle bay. I had to get away from here before I lost it. I just prayed I could keep myself together until Leah was safely back on Earth.
Leah
It was hard, going home. Harder than I had ever dreamed possible. But it was necessary. I needed to get things settled with Gerald and check on Charlotte.