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It was getting dark as Deadguy finished his classes for the day. He couldn't find anymore leads, and he hasn't heard a peep from Jill since he sent the text after lunch. The students were clutching themselves, trying to keep out the cold. He buttoned up his trench coat and started back to his dorm room. He couldn't get that Maria girl off his mind. Did he imagine that electric spark? Yeah, he reasoned with himself. It had to be imaginary. Maybe she broke one of those new electronic pencils. Do they even make electronic pencils? If they did, wouldn't they be a little hard to break?
"David," Marion's voice broke through his thoughts. He stopped, finally noticing the young lady beside him.
"Oh, hey Beautiful," he replied, still somewhat out of it.
"I'm sorry about earlier," she said.
"No, actually, it was my fault. I should have been honest about who I am."
"Oh," she said in an inquisitive tone.
He stopped and turned to her. "Marion, I'm not really David Green."
"O-okay," she replied, confused and concerned.
"I'm actually Deadguy, Professional Hero Extraordinaire." Marion looked at him in confusion. "You have no idea who I am, do you?" She just shook her head. "You've at least heard of the exploits of the Professional Heroes, right?" She shook her head again. "You're not a local girl, are you?"
"Nope," she answered. "I'm from Ohio."
"Ohio. Right. Nice place. Weirdly shaped state."
"Look," she said. "If you're with another girl, it's fine. I'm not going to make you choose."
"There is no another girl," Deadguy defended. "I mean, they're probably a lot of fan girls but..."
"Deadguy," Jill's voice called out from down the sidewalk. He turned to see her and Valkadaidan quickly coming up.
"Boss," he exclaimed, a bit relieved. "Glad you're here. Explain to the lovely, smart, and totally understanding Marion MacGuffin what our relationship is."
"He's my bitch," Jill said without missing a beat.
Deadguy started to nod in agreement, but stopped short once it registered what she said. "No. No. No. That's not even-"
"Listen, 'Hero', we have bigger concerns that you trying to get laid," their boss proclaimed.
"Not trying to get laid," he explained. "Trying to fix a potential relationship."
"Wait," Marion asked. "are you asking me to be your girlfriend?"
"He doesn't have time for a girlfriend," Jill answered, grabbing Our Hero's arm and starting to drag him away.
"No! Don't drag me away from the cute," DG yelled. "Valkster, buddy, give me a hand."
Valkadaidan started to slowly clap.
"Oh, now you've got jokes," Deadguy replied.
Valk stayed behind for a moment, noticing that all the students were watching the ordeal. He acted as if he was pulling something in front of his face and closed his eyes. "And scene," he announced. The students started laughing and applauding as he walked after Jill and Deadguy.
The Heroes barged into the dorm room to find Aaron hunched over a computer, typing like a mad man. "A-Bomb," Deadguy said. "Off the computer. In fact, unplug it and throw it out the window."
"What are you talking about," he growled, turning to see Jill and Valkadaidan with him. "You brought more of your friends.
"We're not his friends," Jill answered, pulling out her gun from behind her back and checking the bullets.
"Ouch," DG replied.
"Listen," she continued. "We're the Professional Heroes, and we're here to save your life."
"Wait, what," Aaron exclaimed. "How's my life in danger?"
"Does the name 'Maria Jones' ring any bells," she asked him.
"Uh...yeah," he answered. "She's been trying to seduce me ever since Jason was murdered."
"Not seduce," Valkadaidan corrected, looking out the window at the courtyard below. "Trying to find her next victim."
"Victim," he yelled. "She wants to kill me?"
"Yeah," Deadguy answered, heading towards the couch. "You mind helping me move this to the door?" Aaron quickly complied. "Ya see, Maria was kicked out about a week after the semester began. Something about 'creepy stalker vibes'."
"That's when the first body showed up," Aaron stated.
"Again, you should have told me this before," DG complained.
They planted the couch in front of the door. "Why is she wanting to kill me," Aaron asked, starting to panic.
"Did you break her heart at any point in the last twenty-four hours," DG asked, starting to unplug everything in the mini-kitchen.
"Yeah, but so what? I mean, it wasn't intentional. Aren't you guys just overreacting." He paused, thinking. "I mean, she's not going to try to kill me by electrocution."
"Not if we have anything to say about it," Jill replied.
"What makes you think she's going to come kill me tonight," Aaron asked. The lights in the dorm suddenly went out, almost as if to answer his question.
"That," Deadguy answered, pointing at the suddenly dead ceiling light.. "Alright gang, on your toes. This party's about to get interesting."
There was a quiet knock at the door. "Aaron," Maria's voice asked from the other side. "Can I come in? I just want to talk."
"Aaron's not here," Deadguy replied. "He's at...um, a bar mitzvah. In Thailand." There was silence for what seemed like eternity. Our Hero turned to the others and shrugged. "Maybe it worked," he mouthed. The door started to crawl with electricity, then shattered open. The couch went flying across the room. Valk quickly unsheathed his katana and sliced the couch clear in two. Maria stood in the doorway, electricity crackling off her body. "How the hell did you blow up a door," he asked. "That's physically impossible.
She quickly glared at him, then pointed. A shower of electricity shot from her finger and knocked him away. "Aaron," she growled, electricity affecting her voice. "I just want to talk about us. I know you love me." She started to walk across the small room towards him.
Jill fired a few shots, but Maria's electric shell fried it before the bullet could make contact. She turned to glare at the red-headed Hero. "Step away from the kid," she ordered. "You're not claiming any more lives." Maria shot out another spark, but was absorbed by Jill's gun. "It's plastic," she remarked. "You didn't think I would bring a metal gun to this fight?"
"I was hoping you were brighter than that," Deadguy said, standing up. Maria looked back at him in disbelief. "Oh, that's clever. A shocked shocker."
"What? How," Maria asked. "That blast should have killed you?"
"Yeah, well, no," he answered. "Now, are you going to calm down or are things going to get annoyingly difficult?"
Maria yelled, sending out a pulse of electricity to hit everyone. Valkadaidan quickly shook off the effects, charging at her. He went to cut her, but she moved almost instantly. A few more slices were met with the same effect. She waved her hand and shot a few bolts at the Dragon-Blooded, sending him flying back.
As she was distracted, Jill tackled her and pinned her down. She was wearing thick, rubber gloves to pin Maria's arms down. "Give up," Jill ordered. "There's no way you can win."
"Oh, I beg to differ," she replied. Electricity started to crawl over her body, finding it's way to Jill's. The result was Jill getting electrocuted. She screamed in pain until Deadguy grabbed her and pulled her off.
"Boss? You still with us," he asked, She didn't respond. A quick check of her pulse told him that she was still alive, just out cold. "That's a relief," he said to himself. Maria stood up and started walking towards Aaron again.
"I tried to be nice about this," she said. "I tried to make you like me, but if I can't have you, no one can!"
"Hey, Overly-Attached Psycho," Deadguy called out. Maria turned to see him aiming the sprayer attachment from the kitchen sink at her. "You need to cool off." He pushed the handle, causing water to spray out. Unfortunately, it fell far short of hitting Maria. "Okay," he remarked. "That could have gone better."
Maria screamed as she shot out a flurry of
electricity at him. He ducked behind the mini-bar while she concentrated her anger and frustration on him. He fumbled in the sink for a few dirty glasses and tried to fill them with water as she started closing in. She stopped, waiting for him to stand up or duck out from the side of the mini-kitchen..
Our Hero shot up suddenly, almost catching her off-guard. "Alright, better pun," he remarked. "You need a drink." He tossed both glasses of water on her. The reaction was exactly what he was hoping for. She started to become overcome with electricity. Howled in pain and fury, she staggered towards the window. "Everyone hit the deck," he yelled. "I think she's about to blow." He ducked behind the kitchen counter and pulled Jill's body behind there.
Maria screamed at the top of her lungs, sending out a huge wave of electricity before crashing through the window and landing on the snowy ground below. Deadguy and Valkadaidan rushed to the window. "Go check on her," Deadguy said.
"You did this," Valk replied. "You go check on her."
"Both of you go," Jill ordered, waking up.
"Glad you finally decided to come back," DG commented.
"Body. Check. Now," she commanded.
The guys shrugged, then jumped out of the window. Valkadaidan landed on one side of her and Deadguy landed on the other. Our Hero leaned down to check her pulse. It was slow, but steady.
"Prognosis," Valk asked.
"She's still alive," he answered. "Don't know how she survived that fall, but she did." The sound of police sirens in the distance took the Heroes attention away from her body. "Quick, dump some snow on her," he suggested.
"Excuse me," Valk questioned.
"Dump snow on her.
"Won't that put her into hypothermia?"
"I didn't say bury her in it. The snow will keep her wet for a while, and she won't be able to use her powers during that time," Deadguy explained. "Hopefully, it will keep her soaked long enough that the cops can get her into some type of restraints."
"You made that up," Valk said.
"I just doused her with two cups of water and you saw what it did," DG replied, dumping some snow on her arms. "I'm taking a guess that the snow, which is water, might have the same effect.
"What's going on down there," Jill asked. The Heroes looked up to her and Aaron looking back down at them.
Deadguy gave her a thumbs up. "We've got a clean victory. Zero casualties."
Jill nodded, still a little groggy from being knocked out. "Sorry about the window," she said to Aaron, patting him on the shoulder as she turned to leave.
Dean Stockwell sat at his desk, writing a check out to the Professional Heroes. He paused, looking up at them and grimaced. "You know," he started. "for all the damage that man has done to my school,” He stabbed the air with his pen at Deadguy. “you should be writing me a check."
"Mm, maybe," Jill responded. Deadguy sat next to her, grinning like a madman. "Of course, we can always go to the police and tell them how you tried to cover up a multiple homicide."
The dean blinked. "What...what do you mean?"
"You honestly expected us to believe that any of the thousands of heroes running around Davenshire, not one would take the trip up here to New Tao and take her out," Jill questioned.
"You didn't want the public scandal involved with having a super hero swoop in and take out Maria," Valkadaidan commented.
"Not to mention the far greater collateral damage and danger to the student body that would have come from such a battle," Deadguy added.
"This is blackmail," Stockwell exclaimed.
"No," Jill said calmly. She leaned forward. "This is business. Now, if you will just finish writing that check, we'll be on our way and no one will have to know the truth."
He glared at her, then quickly finished writing. He tossed the check at her and turned around to look out the window. "Get out," he growled. "If I ever see any of you set foot on my campus again, I will have you arrested for trespassing."
The Heroes started to leave. "Oh, that's okay," Deadguy replied. "I've always been more of a New Tao Tech fan anyway." Dean Stockwell turned. He was pissed. "Go Mechas," he said, giving a thumb's up before laughing and running off.
END
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