© 2014 by Grace Livingston Hill
eBook Editions:
Adobe Digital Edition (.epub) 978-1-63058-188-6
Kindle and MobiPocket Edition (.prc) 978-1-63058-187-9
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced or transmitted for commercial purposes, except for brief quotations in printed reviews, without written permission of the publisher.
All scripture quotations are taken from the King James Version of the Bible.
This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are either products of the author’s imagination or used fictitiously. Any similarity to actual people, organizations, and/or events is purely coincidental.
Published by Barbour Books, an imprint of Barbour Publishing, Inc., P.O. Box 719, Uhrichsville, Ohio 44683, www.barbourbooks.com
Our mission is to publish and distribute inspirational products offering exceptional value and biblical encouragement to the masses.
TABLE OF CONTENTS
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
About the Author
Chapter 1
New York
Christobel got out of the car and went into the house alone. She had asked them to let her out. She did not want to go to the station with her stepmother’s parents and was glad that her father had not insisted upon it.
It had been all she could stand to drive from the cemetery with them. It had made her feel like screaming. They were a pair of incompetent, weak-faced jellyfish, she reflected as she slowly mounted the marble steps to her father’s pretentious home. It was all wrong, people like that being mixed up in any relationship with her wonderful father! How did it ever happen that he had got into such a mess? She tried to think back to the days when her father first met her stepmother, but it was all very vague, an indefinite part of her childhood, although she distinctly remembered her own mother, and the soft feel of her kisses, and her arms hugging her close.
These aliens, her stepmother’s parents, angered her. What right had they to come into a family affair and demand to be thought about and planned for and taken to the station just when the dreadful, ostentatious funeral service was at an end?
Of course, they were Charmian’s parents. That had to be considered. And as one looked at their shallow old faces, one could see resemblances to the vivid beauty that had been Charmian. Charmian! What a name to give a woman who had to at least pretend to be a mother. Yet that old woman’s face made it perfectly natural that her daughter should have been named Charmian. Just a silly, weak woman with a pouting bottom lip and a slightly retreating chin; she had never grown up, though her body was withering like an old garden hose that was turning brown at the edges. Light hair, bleached to a yellow gray. Weak blue eyes that took in everything, even from behind her impressive black veil.
She didn’t miss a thing, even with tears in her eyes, thought Christobel grimly. I suppose she did feel bad, maybe. Charmian was her own daughter, after all. Still, she hadn’t seen much of her for several years. Charmian’s death couldn’t weigh on her very heavily. I don’t believe anything ever weighed on her but herself anyway. She looks selfish!
Would Charmian have looked like her mother if she had lived to be an old wrinkled woman like that? Christobel went on idly meditating as she hunted in her handbag for her key.
Charmian had been very vivid, gorgeous, even in her coffin. It had seemed as if she were playing a part. There was that affected smile she always wore when in company, her lips delicately pursed, her eyebrows placid, the long lashes lying on rose-petal cheeks. Christobel could vaguely understand why her father had married her.
Yet looking at her as she lay there, almost smothered in those heaps of flowers, Christobel had not been able to forget the look of those coral lips when they had told her that she was to go away to school; the lifting of those exquisite eyebrows in haughty disapproval at Randall, her young brother, when he made a noise; the unloving, prideful expression of the spoiled beauty who had become her mother in the early days of her sorrow over the loss of her own precious mother.
Seated in the car opposite this Charmian-mother’s mother, Christobel had found herself tracing the same selfish lines exposed in the old face that she had never been able to forget in the face of the daughter. Oh, it was plain to be seen why the dead woman had grown up silly and petted and spoiled.
And the old father. He had a weak chin and watery eyes that had looked around on the strange city streets with an indifferent air. If he had any character of his own, he had long ago taken the easiest way out and given it to his peevish wife. Yes, it was easy to see Charmian in the two of them.
Christobel drew a long breath and tried to wipe them out of her memory. They were not her grandparents, anyway. She had always been eager for grandparents and had looked forward with some interest and not a little curiosity to their coming to the funeral. But these shallow old people had merely explained her stepmother, set her into her true background, and confirmed the feeling that Christobel had always secretly had about her, even at the first when she was trying to obey her father’s earnest request to love this strange, too-giddy mother that he had found to fill the empty place.
Oh, well, that was that, she reflected as she fitted her key into the lock and opened the huge door with its bronze fittings.
Christobel didn’t like that door, nor the big stone lions that crouched on either side of the entrance. They seemed too ostentatious. She didn’t like the big house with its high ceilings and modernistic furniture. It had nothing of home about it. It had been her stepmother’s choice. Christobel wondered if her father helped pick it out, whether he liked it.
Every vacation when she had come home for a few days to receive a new outfit and be hustled off to some girls’ camp, or get ready to go back to school again, the house had seemed less and less like a home, and more like a furniture display in a huge department store. There wasn’t a thing in it that one could feel like loving and keeping.
Christobel closed the door softly, as one should a door whose mistress had gone out of it, never to return, and went and stood in the great doorway of the reception room on the right.
She stepped softly, within the heavy hangings of the silver cloth backed with velvety black and took in the whole barbaric effect of silver and black and startling splashes of scarlet that made the room look like some strange, alien, fantastic world. Weird lights in odd places; angular, pyramid-shaped mirrors like flashes of bright sabers; boxlike furniture that gave one the odd sense of being in a dream and finding the world upside down. It was not like a home at all, this great uncanny room.
This was the place that Charmian had created herself, a world of unrealities, and now she was gone out of it all! Here were the things she had brought together, but she had had to leave them all and lie in a bed of roses and be put away under the ground.
Where was she now? Was this all that was left of her?
Some of the teachers at school had openly said that there was no other life than this. But Christobel had never been willing to accept that theory. She had always thought of her own mother as being somewhere, in some definite place, watching her perhaps, and surely waiting for her to come someday when she was an old woman.
But now, this other woman, who was not in any sense a mother,
who had insisted upon being called Charmian by the children of her husband, who had packed them off to a school in almost babyhood and made a strange alien world of home, where was she now that she was gone out of life?
Was there anyone for her to be with? Or was she all alone? Did she have to wait somewhere for that unpleasant old weak-chinned father and mother whom she had never noticed much on earth? Oh, life was an odd tangle! A problem that could never be solved till one went out of it.
Of course, there were people who could throw all that off and just not think about it. Eat, drink, and be merry. Most of her classmates were like that. They laughed at her when she asked serious questions. They said, “Why worry? You can only be alive once!” and danced merrily on.
But Christobel had never been able to do that. She had made merry with the rest, had been fairly feverish in trying to have every minute filled with something bright and cheerful so that she would not have time to think. But underneath there had always been that question, that wonder, that hope that would not be stilled; yes, and that fear, too, that this life was not all that she ought to be doing about it, though she had not an idea in the world what it was that she might do. Nobody else seemed to be worrying about it. Not even death seemed to stir many of them seriously. They hurried to get the funeral over with and get back to life, merry, bright, breath-taking life! Charmian had been that way, too. She had hated funerals. She had hated even the very mention of funerals.
Though Christobel had spent very little time with her stepmother in the ten or eleven years Charmian had been married to her father, she knew a great deal about Charmian’s likes and dislikes, her fears and contempts. Every contact with the handsome stepmother seemed graven deep into her sensitive heart. For instance, she would never forget the bored drawl of Charmian’s voice the night she crept from her lonely little bed, put to sleep unkissed. Christobel had come weeping to find her father, who had always remembered the good-nights before, only to discover he and Charmian in the midst of the discussion about sending Christobel and her brother Randall off to school.
“But they are only babies yet,” she heard her father say in a shocked voice.
“That’s it,” Charmian had drawled insolently. “I can’t be bored with babies, certainly not some other woman’s babies. That wasn’t what I married you for.”
In the midst of the awful silence that had followed those words, Christobel had crept trembling to her little bed and wept herself to sleep. But she had never forgotten Charmian’s voice, nor the white angry look on her father’s face.
Another time later, when Christobel was at home for a few days, Charmian had revealed a great fear. The cook had been sick, terribly sick, and the doctor had sent for Charmian, telling her the servant was dying. Charmian had looked at Christobel, then only about thirteen, and wrung her hands together and cried out:
“Oh, I can’t go, Chrissie! It would make me ill. I never could bear sickness, and I’m afraid of death. You go, that’s a good girl.”
And Christobel, with a great wonder and a growing contempt and a secret dread, went. Out of shame for Charmian, Christobel had gone and held the hand of the dying cook, patting her cold wet brow, holding up the hand that had tried to make the sign of the cross at the last moment.
Now, as Christobel looked about the great grotesque room, forcing herself to walk softly, as if still in the presence of the dead, entering the little inner room that had been Charmian’s special sanctum, she was summing up all her impressions of her stepmother and wondering what there could be for her in that other life to which she had gone—if there really was another life.
White velvet here in this inner room, white velvet lining to the silver draperies, white velvet rug, marble and onyx in the floor and tables; white-shaded, white-pedestaled lamps of alabaster, wildly lovely, with a glow like hidden fire in their white, white depths; white velvet draperies at the windows about a frostwork of handmade lace. Could anything be more exquisite, pure, simple, lovely, like driven snow? Crystal flowers in great costly sprays of well-placed mirrors, voluptuous bits of statuary, modern to the last degree, the only bit of color a lank slim devil of a doll in sumptuous taffeta of palest green and rose, lolling with abandoned air over a white velvet chair. The room might have been a lone iceberg at the North Pole, with a faint tinge of sunset in the sky, so white and lonesome it looked.
Yet in all that whiteness there was not a suggestion of purity or holiness. It rather seemed like something lovely gone astray, dishonored, put to wrong use.
Christobel shivered and wondered at her vague thoughts. She could not reason out all these things—she was too young and inexperienced, yet she felt them, like balls of ice against her young consciousness, and tears stung her eyes and made a lump in her throat.
Charmian had surrounded herself with all this, for herself to enjoy. And suddenly, without warning, just a sharp pain in the night, some power rushed her out of it all, rushed her to the hospital in terror, through a frantic operation that was too late, and herself, her little petted self, had been snatched away from the white velvet life she had planned. Planned, not because she liked things white and pure and sweet, but because she delighted to take a precious costly thing and desecrate it for herself. This was the great thought that hovered crushingly over Christobel’s overstrained consciousness. Where, where, where had Charmian gone? Almost she felt a passing pity for the woman she knew had hated her.
Sudden distant voices in the other part of the house brought Christobel back to the present. She turned swiftly and moved noiselessly over the deep priceless rugs, back to shelter of the heavy draperies and into the wide hall. Those were the servants’ voices, and she did not wish to get caught here looking into Charmian’s personal sanctum as if she were curious.
The voices came from the dining room, diagonally across the wide hall, but the silent, empty house carried words clearly. Indeed, the voices were not hushed. It was evident from the clinking sounds that silver and crystal were being placed upon the table and sideboard. Probably the dinner table was being prepared for the evening meal.
Christobel was not very well acquainted with the servants in the house. She had arrived only the day before, and all were new since her last homecoming. Charmian had a way of changing her minions often.
“Well, and now I wonder what’ll be next?” said a voice with a decided Irish accent. Christobel wondered if it might be the cook, only what would a cook be doing in the dining room? Her province was the kitchen. It must be the parlormaid.
Then it sounded as if the someone else entered and put something down on the sideboard.
“Oh, now,” giggled the parlormaid, “I suppose we’ll have to have a spell of Mrs. Romayne.”
“What’s Mrs. Romayne got to do with it?” asked the lofty voice of the butler, who was new in the house and had not gotten the way of things yet.
“Oh, you don’t know Mrs. Romayne yet, do you, Hawkins?” giggled the parlormaid knowingly. “Wait till you see. She’ll have very much to do. She’s come back from Florida especially to look after things. She called up this morning when they were all out and said she’d be in this afternoon after the service. Oh, you’ll find out. She’ll meddle in every blessed thing. She’s that kind. You ought to have heard her nosy questions this morning.”
“But who is she?” demanded the butler.
“Oh, she’s a pretty widow lady that’s crazy about the master,” responded the parlormaid. “Wait till you see. Honey on her tongue, and a laugh like a young bird.”
“Is the master fond of her?” asked the butler.
“Who can tell?” chirped the parlormaid. “What difference would that make, anyway?”
“All the difference in the world,” said the butler wisely.
“Ah, but you don’t know the lady, Hawkins,” giggled the girl. “She’s clever, that woman is. She knows what she wants and she gets it. I’ve seen her work before.”
“Well, it’s not likely I’ve met her before. I’ll look
her over. If I don’t like her, I’m leaving,” announced the butler.
“Shh! There’s Marie comin’ in from the funeral,” warned the cook. “Better not talk in front of her. She’s a sneak. She’d likely tell the master, if what she heard served her own interests. They certainly had a long service. I hope the proud lady is well buried and deep.”
Christobel, in her shelter of the silver draperies, shivered. There was something uncannily harsh in the tone of the woman. She felt as if she ought to rebuke her, yet what would she say? She shrank from having anything to do with them. She could wait a moment until they all went back to the kitchen. They evidently did not know she had come in. She had no position in her father’s house yet. The spirit of Charmian still lingered in those grotesque rooms.
“Hi, there, Marie!” challenged the parlormaid. “Have a pleasant funeral? What was she like? Was there a lot of flowers?”
“Oh, sure,” said the lady’s maid loftily, “a grand funeral. And she looked as lovely as life.”
“Say, Marie,” asked the furtive voice of the cook. “What come o’ them fur coats she bought the day she was took sick? Did she keep ’em?”
“Sure she kept ’em. She was just crazy about ’em. I’m goin’ up now an’ try on that sable wrap. If there’s time before the family gets back, I’ll come down an’ show ya.”
There was a sound of the swinging door into the butler’s pantry.
“Do that,” encouraged the cook. Evidently the butler and parlormaid had gone out. “An’ say, Marie, if ya happen ta come across that there string of purple beads she useta wear, just bring ’em along. I’d like ’em as a souvenir! You do that fer me, an’ I’ll say nothin’ about what I know! See?”
“All right,” agreed Charmian’s maid. “I s’pose you know those beads are real amethyst. They’re worth a lot. But I ain’t goin’ ta do a thing till after Miss Christobel goes back ta school. She’s got eyes like a cat, that girl. She’ll likely go back tanight ur tamorra, and then I got clear sailin’. The master’ll leave it ta me to put things in order. He doesn’t know what she had. He’ll never miss anything.”