Chapter VIII

  My messmates show me the folly of running in debt--Duty carried onpolitely--I become acquainted with some gentlemen of the homedepartment--The episode of Sholto M'Foy.

  Now that I have been on board about a month, I find that my life is notdisagreeable. I don't smell the pitch and tar, and I can get into myhammock without tumbling out on the other side. My messmates aregood-tempered, although they laugh at me very much; but I must say thatthey are not very nice in their ideas of honour They appear to considerthat to take you in is a capital joke; and that because they laugh atthe time that they are cheating you, it then becomes no cheating at all.Now I cannot think otherwise than that cheating is cheating, and that aperson is not a bit more honest, because he laughs at you in thebargain. A few days after I came on board, I purchased some tarts of thebumboat woman, as she is called; I wished to pay for them, but she hadno change, and very civilly told me she would trust me. She produced anarrow book, and said that she would open an account with me, and Icould pay her when I thought proper. To this arrangement I had noobjection, and I sent up for different things until I thought that myaccount must have amounted to eleven or twelve shillings. As I promisedmy father that I never would run in debt, I considered that it was thentime that it should be settled. When I asked for it, what was mysurprise to find that it amounted to L2 14s. 6d. I declared that it wasimpossible, and requested that she would allow me to look at the items,when I found that I was booked for at least three or four dozen tartsevery day, ordered by the young gentlemen, "to be put down to MrSimple's account." I was very much shocked, not only at the sum of moneywhich I had to pay, but also at the want of honesty on the part of mymessmates; but when I complained of it in the berth, they all laughed atme.

  At last one of them said, "Peter, tell the truth; did not your fathercaution you not to run in debt?"

  "Yes, he did," replied I.

  "I know that very well," replied he; "all fathers do the same when theirsons leave them; it's a matter of course. Now observe, Peter; it is outof regard to you, that your messmates have been eating tarts at yourexpense You disobeyed your father's injunctions before you had been amonth from home; and it is to give you a lesson that may be useful inafter-life, that they have considered it their duty to order the tarts.I trust that it will not be thrown away upon you. Go to the woman, payyour bill, and never run up another."

  "That I certainly shall not," replied I; but as I could not prove whoordered the tarts, and did not think it fair that the woman should loseher money, I went up and paid the bill with a determination never toopen an account with anybody again.

  But this left my pockets quite empty, so I wrote to my father, statingthe whole transaction, and the consequent state of my finances. Myfather, in his answer, observed that whatever might have been theirmotives, my messmates had done me a friendly act; and that as I had lostmy money by my own carelessness, I must not expect that he would allowme any more pocket-money. But my mother, who added a postscript to hisletter, slipped in a five-pound note, and I do believe that it was withmy father's sanction, although he pretended to be very angry at myforgetting his injunctions. This timely relief made me quite comfortableagain. What a pleasure it is to receive a letter from one's friends whenfar away, especially when there is same money in it!

  A few days before this, Mr Falcon, the first lieutenant, ordered me toput on my side-arms to go away on duty. I replied that I had neitherdirk nor cocked hat, although I had applied for them. He laughed at mystory, and sent me on shore with the master, who bought them, and thefirst lieutenant sent up the bill to my father, who paid it, and wroteto thank him for his trouble. That morning, the first lieutenant said tome, "Now, Mr Simple, we'll take the shine off that cocked hat and dirkof yours. You will go in the boat with Mr O'Brien, and take care thatnone of the men slip away from it, and get drunk at the tap."

  This was the first time that I had ever been sent away on duty, and Iwas very proud of being an officer in charge. I put on my full uniform,and was ready at the gangway a quarter of an hour before the men werepiped away. We were ordered to the dockyard to draw sea stores. When wearrived there, I was quite astonished at the piles of timber, the rangesof storehouses, and the immense anchors which lay on the wharf. Therewas such a bustle, every body appeared to be so busy, that I wanted tolook every way at once. Close to where the boat landed, they werehauling a large frigate out of what they called the basin; and I was sointerested with the sight, that I am sorry to say I quite forgot allabout the boat's crew, and my orders to look after them. What surprisedme most was, that although the men employed appeared to be sailors,their language was very different from what I had been lately accustomedto on board of the frigate. Instead of damning and swearing, everybodywas so polite. "Oblige me with a pull of the starboard bow hawser, MrJones."--"Ease off the larboard hawser, Mr Jenkins, if you please."--"Side her over, gentlemen, side her over."--"My compliments to MrTompkins, and request that he will cast off the quarter-check."--"Sideher over, gentlemen, side her over, if you please."--"In the boat there,pull to Mr Simmons, and beg he'll do me the favour to check her as sheswings. What's the matter, Mr Johnson?"--"Vy, there's one of them eremidshipmites has thrown a red hot tater out of the stern-port, and hitour officer in the eye."--"Report him to the commissioner, Mr Wiggins;and oblige me by under-running the guess-warp. Tell Mr Simkins, with mycompliments, to coil away upon the jetty. Side her over, side her over,gentlemen, if you please."

  I asked of a bystander who these people were, and he told me that theywere dockyard mateys. I certainly thought that it appeared to be quiteas easy to say "If you please," as "D----n your eyes," and that itsounded much more agreeable.

  During the time that I was looking at the frigate being hauled out, twoof the men belonging to the boat slipped away, and on my return theywere not to be seen. I was very much frightened, for I knew that I hadneglected my duty, and that on the first occasion on which I had beenintrusted with a responsible service. What to do I did not know I ran upand down every part of the dockyard until I was quite out of breath,asking everybody I met whether they had seen my two men. Many of themsaid that they had seen plenty of men, but did not exactly know mine;some laughed, and called me a greenhorn. At last I met a midshipman, whotold me that he had seen two men answering to my description on the roofof the coach starting for London, and that I must be quick if I wishedto catch them; but he would not stop to answer any more questions. Icontinued walking about the yard until I met twenty or thirty men withgrey jackets and breeches, to whom I applied for information: they toldme that they had seen two sailors skulking behind the piles of timber.They crowded round me, and appeared very anxious to assist me, when theywere summoned away to carry down a cable. I observed that they all hadnumbers on their jackets, and either one or two bright iron rings ontheir legs. I could not help inquiring, although I was in such a hurry,why the rings were worn. One of them replied that they were orders ofmerit, given to them for their good behaviour.

  I was proceeding on very disconsolately, when, as I turned a corner, tomy great delight, I met my two men, who touched their hats and said thatthey had been looking for me. I did not believe that they told thetruth, but I was so glad to recover them that I did not scold, but wentwith them down to the boat, which had been waiting some time for us.O'Brien, the master's mate, called me a young sculping,[1] a word Inever heard before. When we arrived on board, the first lieutenant askedO'Brien why he had remained so long. He answered that two of the men hadleft the boat, but that I had found them. The first lieutenant appearedto be pleased with me, observing, as he had said before, that I was nofool, and I went down below, overjoyed at my good fortune, and very muchobliged to O'Brien for not telling the whole truth. After I had takenoff my dirk and cocked hat, I felt for my pocket-handkerchief, and foundthat it was not in my pocket, having in all probability been taken outby the men in grey jackets, whom, in conversation with my messmates, Idiscovered to be convicts condemned to hard labour for stealing andp
icking pockets.

  A day or two afterwards, we had a new messmate of the name of M'Foy. Iwas on the quarter-deck when he came on board and presented a letter tothe captain, inquiring first if his name was "Captain Sauvage." He was aflorid young man, nearly six feet high, with sandy hair, yet verygood-looking. As his career in the service was very short, I will tellat once, what I did not find out till some time afterwards. The captainhad agreed to receive him to oblige a brother officer, who had retiredfrom the service, and lived in the Highlands of Scotland. The firstnotice which the captain had of the arrival of Mr M'Foy, was from aletter written to him by the young man's uncle. This amused him so much,that he gave it to the first lieutenant to read: it ran as follows:--

  "Glasgow, April 25, 1---

  "Sir,--Our much esteemed and mutual friend, Captain M'Alpine, having communicated by letter, dated the 14th inst., your kind intentions relative to my nephew Sholto M'Foy, (for which you will be pleased to accept my best thanks), I write to acquaint you that he is now on his way to join your ship, the _Diomede_, and will arrive, God willing, twenty-six hours after the receipt of this letter.

  "As I have been given to understand by those who have some acquaintance with the service of the king, that his equipment as an officer will be somewhat expensive, I have considered it but fair to ease your mind as to any responsibility on that score, and have therefore enclosed the half of a Bank of England note for ten pounds sterling, No. 3742, the other half of which will be duly forwarded in a frank promised to me the day after to-morrow. I beg you will make the necessary purchases, and apply the balance, should there be any, to his mess account, or any other expenses which you may consider warrantable or justifiable.

  "It is at the same time proper to inform you, that Sholto had ten shillings in his pocket at the time of his leaving Glasgow; the satisfactory expenditure of which I have no doubt you will inquire into, as it is a large sum to be placed at the discretion of a youth only fourteen years and five months old. I mention his age, as Sholto is so tall that you might be deceived by his appearance, and be induced to trust to his prudence in affairs of this serious nature. Should he at any time require further assistance beyond his pay, which I am told is extremely handsome to all king's officers, I beg you to consider that any draught of yours, at ten days' sight, to the amount of five pounds sterling English, will be duly honoured by the firm of Monteith, M'Killop, and Company, of Glasgow. Sir, with many thanks for your kindness and consideration,

  "I remain, your most obedient,

  "WALTER MONTEITH."

  The letter brought on board by M'Foy was to prove his identity. Whilethe captain read it, M'Foy stared about him like a wild stag. Thecaptain welcomed him to the ship, asked him one or two questions,introduced him to the first lieutenant, and then went on shore. Thefirst lieutenant had asked me to dine in the gun-room; I supposed thathe was pleased with me because I had found the men; and when the captainpulled on shore, he also invited Mr M'Foy, when the followingconversation took place.

  "Well, Mr M'Foy, you have had a long journey; I presume it is the firstthat you have ever made."

  "Indeed it is, sir," replied M'Foy; "and sorely I've been pestered. HadI minded all they whispered in my lug as I came along, I had need beenmade of money--sax-pence here, sax-pence there, sax-pence every where.Sich extortion I ne'er dreamt of."

  "How did you come from Glasgow?"

  "By the wheelboat, or steamboat, as they ca'd it, to Lunnon: where theycharged me sax-pence for taking my baggage on shore--a wee boxy naebigger than yon cocked-up hat. I would fain carry it mysel', but theywadna let me."

  "Well, where did you go to when you arrived in London?"

  "I went to a place ca'd Chichester Rents, to the house of Storm andMainwaring, Warehousemen, and they must have another sax-pence forshowing me the way. There I waited half-an-hour in the counting-house,till they took me to a place ca'd Bull and Mouth, and put me into acoach, paying my whole fare: nevertheless they must din me for money thewhole of the way down. There was first the guard, and then the coachman,and another guard, and another coachman; but I wudna listen to them, andso they growled and abused me."

  "And when did you arrive?"

  "I came here last night; and I only had a bed and a breakfast at the twaBlue Pillars' house, for which they extortioned me three shillings andsax-pence, as I sit here. And then there was the chambermaid hussy andwaiter loon axed me to remember them, and wanted more siller; but I toldthem as I told the guard and coachman, that I had none for them."

  "How much of your ten shillings have you left?" inquired the firstlieutenant, smiling.

  "Hoot, sir lieutenant, how came you for to ken that? Eh! it's my uncleMonteith at Glasgow. Why, as I sit here, I've but three shillings and apenny of it lift. But there's a smell here that's no canny; so I'll justgo up again into the fresh air."

  When Mr M'Foy quitted the gun-room they all laughed very much. After hehad been a short time on deck he went down into the midshipmen's berth;but he made himself very unpleasant, quarrelling and wrangling witheverybody. It did not, however, last very long; for he would not obeyany orders that were given to him. On the third day, he quitted the shipwithout asking the permission of the first lieutenant; when he returnedon board the following day, the first lieutenant put him under anarrest, and in charge of the sentry at the cabin door. During theafternoon I was under the half-deck, and perceived that he wassharpening a long clasp-knife upon the after-truck of the gun. I went upto him, and asked him why he was doing so, and he replied, as his eyesflashed fire, that it was to revenge the insult offered to the bluid ofM'Foy. His look told me that he was in earnest. "But what do you mean?"inquired I. "I mean," said he, drawing the edge and feeling the point ofhis weapon, "to put it into the weam of that man with the gold podge onhis shoulder, who has dared to place me here."

  I was very much alarmed, and thought it my duty to state his murderousintentions, or worse might happen; so I walked up on deck and told thefirst lieutenant what M'Foy was intending to do, and how his life was indanger. Mr Falcon laughed, and shortly afterwards went down on themain-deck. M'Foy's eyes glistened, and he walked forward to where thefirst lieutenant was standing; but the sentry, who had been cautioned byme, kept him back with his bayonet. The first lieutenant turned round,and perceiving what was going on, desired the sentry to see if Mr M'Foyhad a knife in his hand; and he had it sure enough, open, and heldbehind his back. He was disarmed, and the first lieutenant, perceivingthat the lad meant mischief, reported his conduct to the captain, on hisarrival on board. The captain sent for M'Foy, who was very obstinate,and when taxed with his intention would not deny it, or even say that hewould not again attempt it; so he was sent on shore immediately, andreturned to his friends in the Highlands. We never saw any more of him;but I heard that he obtained a commission in the army, and three monthsafter he had joined his regiment, was killed in a duel, resenting somefancied affront offered to the bluid of M'Foy.

  [Footnote 1: Peter's memory is short, p. 9.--ED.]