Chapter 17
The roads were quieting down, most people settling down into their weeknight routines. I was the only one who was out of mine. If it had been an ordinary night, I would have been heading out from the office with a stack of papers from Ruben and a night of blood and guts ahead of me.
I wanted to go back to that. It hadn’t been a great job, and I’d always been a little torn. But it was familiar. Safe, ironically. It was my life.
What did I have now? A big mess to clear up before it was all too late.
The neighborhood felt like it always did, with so many suburban families at home. The neighborhood buzzed with vibrant life – if not happiness, then at least contentment. Families were together; I could feel the strength of their bonds as I passed the houses. It made me feel strangely untethered, like an island. Surrounded by nothing but ocean. Disconnected from everything else like me.
I cut the engine before I got to Connor’s house and rolled the last couple of feet. But who was I fooling? He had probably heard me coming. He was a purebred, with hearing that outmatched my own. But it made me feel better to do it this way. It made me feel like somehow I still had control.
I parked my bike and slid off it, then walked up the dark driveway. I was aware again of the strong scent of night flowers. The jasmine hung the thickest in the air, and I couldn’t decide if I liked it or hated it. Smells brought with them so many memories, both good and bad.
I tried the front door, the only entrance to the house I hadn’t used before, and found it unlocked. That was a surprise. If Connor was home, I expected him to have stronger security.
Clyde, the mean old housecat, came to the door making a low moaning sound that warned me off.
“Get over it,” I sneered. I worked from the one room to the next, systematically checking each of them. I had my SIG out, gripped in two hands and pointed toward the floor. I didn’t want to shoot Connor, for once, but I didn’t want to run into unwanted company either. After all, the door had been unlocked.
When I got to the office, a room I’d only been in once before, I found Connor standing in it with his back to me. “So, you’ve decided to have another run at it,” he said, not looking at me.
His voice was dull, empty. He sounded bored. But the muscles in his back were tense, both his feet were planted firmly on the floor, and I knew all his attention was on me, not on the papers he was flipping through.
“I’m not here to kill you,” I said. My voice sounded thin. I didn’t feel capable and tough tonight. I had three guns on me, but I’d never been so nervous in my life.
I tucked my SIG back into my waistband to prove my point. Connor still wasn’t looking at me, but I didn’t doubt that he’d heard me.
“I know you’re not,” he said.
Finally, he turned to me. His face seemed paler than it had been before, and his eyes had faint circles underneath them. He looked taller, and the skin on his face clung to the bone underneath so I could see the structure of his skull. I wanted to ask if he was all right, but it wasn’t my place to do that.
“I need your help,” I said.
“What for?”
I’d expected an immediate no. His answer sparked a little hope inside of me.
“I need to find the masters. I need to know how to find them. They’re angry, and at some point I’m going to have to face them.”
“Well, that can’t be due to any failure on your part,” he said, his voice cold and hard. “After all, you did shoot me. I was just lucky enough to be faster than the bullet.”
“Connor…”
“I’d like for you to leave,” he said, then he walked past me.
“Connor, please. I… they have Aspen.”
I hated to admit my weakness. I hated that I was begging for help. But there was nothing I wouldn’t do for my sister. If I had to give the upper hand to my mark… well, I’d do that.
“At this point, Adele, I don’t really think I want to help you. I’ve done more than enough to show you that you’re above all this. That you’re worth more.”
And all this time I’d thought he’d intentionally been driving me crazy. A sharp pain shot through my chest.
“I fell for you,” he admitted. “God knows that was the biggest mistake in the world. Who falls for the girl who’s trying to kill you?”
“Why did you?” I asked, because suddenly I was dying to know what anyone could see in me other than a monster. That was all that I saw in the mirror anymore. I had that horrible scar and eyes that promised nothing but death, and I dressed it all up in leathers and guns that drove the point home.
“How can someone like you think anything… good… about me?”
He chuckled, without humor. “I don’t know the answer to that,” he said, and his words stung. “You see, there was a time when I believed I could see the beauty in you, despite all the ugliness you’re trying to bury it under. I wanted to believe that I could change you, that I could show you what it’s like to have something to live for again. Something that would stop you looking over your shoulder, back at your father.”
I suddenly felt like there wasn’t a single bone in my body. I reached out for the wall to steady myself before I lost my balance.
“How did you know?” I asked, my voice brittle.
“Your secrets may not be in the news now, Adele, but they were once upon a time. It didn’t take a lot of digging to get the story. Not that I can even begin to imagine what you’re dealing with, but I told myself that what you were doing was justifiable.”
“And still you think I’m the monster,” I sneered. I was getting closer and closer to crying, and I had to come up with a plan to make the tears go away, fast. Being mean was the only way I knew, even if it meant I got hurt even more.
“I don’t think you’re a monster. At least I didn’t. But it takes a lot for someone to shoot the man she’s just slept with point blank. I’m not so sure anymore.”
I took a deep breath, and it was shaky. It made me sound weak. I looked weak. I knew that. And I hated it.
“Please just help me with Aspen,” I said. “Then you can hate me forever.”
Connor smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes.
“I’m sorry, princess,” he said, and then he disappeared. I was left alone in the empty house.
Clyde padded into the room silently and mewed.
“Shut up,” I said, and left the house.
My eyes burned as I tore full throttle down the road. Everything around me faded to a blur and the wind whipped around me, yanking at my emotions. I prayed they would blow away behind me.
I made it to the ugly side of town in under five minutes, sure there were about six cameras with pictures of my plates on them now. But I didn’t care. Joel could squash them for me again.
Joel.
My stomach contracted, and I felt like I was going to throw up. If he was dead…
I didn’t even want to think about it. I was becoming more and more aware that I was completely alone. I had no one left. I wasn’t one of those people with a huge social life. But I did have a few people I held dear.
And one by one, they were being ripped away from me. That was why I was in this filthy neighborhood where the streets were full of garbage, a twisted insight to the type of people who lived here. The night was quiet, and there wasn’t a light on in any of the windows I passed. Not even the streetlights were on despite the fact that it was going on eleven o’clock.
I parked in front of the rundown building where Carlos lived. At night it was even worse; the whole place seemed to have sunk in on itself. When I stepped into the lobby, it really did feel haunted. Everything was dark; the counter where the doorman should have been was a gaping black hole. I hurried through the lobby towards the hallway where I would find Carlos’s door.
When I reached it, I stretched out my hand to knock, then I caught myself. The door wasn’t closed completely. It was slightly ajar. The apartment
inside was quiet, no music blaring like the last time I’d been here.
“Please, no,” I whispered. Not Carlos too…
“Well, we didn’t expect to see you here,” a voice purred around me. I couldn’t tell where it was coming from, but I recognized its echoing quality and soft, seductive tone.
I spun around. She laughed, and it danced around me like chimes in the wind.
“You’re just a surprise every time, aren’t you?” she said. Her words echoed in a whisper that made my skin crawl.
I looked up and down the hallway, relying on my other senses because I couldn’t see in the dark, but it was difficult to tell where she was. She was very good at making it sound like she was everywhere at once.
“What’s wrong, Celia?” I asked, using her name for the first time. “Too scared to come out and face me? Is that why you’re hiding?”
She laughed again, and this time it was laced with malice. I knew she wasn’t scared. There was arrogance in the air, and a lot of confidence. If there was any fear, it was mine. I needed her to come out and show herself because as much as I hated to admit it, I couldn’t find her.
I knew she wasn’t inside the apartment, so I stepped back toward the lobby. As I got closer, Celia laughed again, and this time it came from one place: the dark area where the counter was.
I took another step, and then I saw a dark shape, crouching on the counter. Her eyes were glowing green, which gave her away. I reached behind my back to pull my gun, but she launched herself toward me and she was quicker than I was. She managed to knock me to the floor even though I attempted to duck. I hit the floor, and for a moment I couldn’t breathe.
“You shouldn’t challenge me if you’re not ready to face me,” Celia said, her voice sweet and sultry.
“Oh, I’m ready,” I said, pushing myself up.
I was more than fed up with this woman. I’d taken out the S&W and held it tight, my fingers curling around the butt like it was a lifeline. She was quick, but if I could get this one shot fired, she wouldn’t live to laugh about it. I took aim at the dark shadow with the gleaming eyes and pulled the trigger.
The shot rang out, and the plaster splintered. A big hole in the wall showed me where the bullet had hit.
And she laughed again. Dammit.
Then, out of nowhere, she kicked me on the jaw and I saw stars. The gun fell and bounced away, and I heard a dull thud in the darkness as the world tilted. A second later my head hit the floor.
I lay there stunned, trying to get my bearings. The carpet was rough and gritty under my cheek. When I tried to get up, my head spun and I felt sick. That was definitely a concussion.
She waited for me to pull myself together and get back up before she struck again. I was ready for her this time, and I got in a blow. I imagined I’d given her a bloody nose, at least, but I wasn’t sure.
I unsheathed the knife at my thigh and held the blade away from me. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a shadow move, and I slashed without thinking.
I cut something. She screamed an unearthly howl and my blade had blood on it. Where I’d gotten her, I didn’t know.
“You have to stop doing that,” she sneered.
I knew she was hurting. I could hear it in her voice. There were very few supernatural creatures that could withstand silver – and she wasn’t one of them.
I reached behind my back for my SIG. I wanted to kill the bitch.
Her next attack was slower, which told me I’d cut her somewhere that mattered, but again she was faster than I was and she knocked the SIG out of my hand too. She was still putting up a damn good fight, and she came in with her claws, ready to scratch my eyes out.
I was just as eager to get to hers, so I punched her in the face. She managed to scratch me down the throat, but I already had a scar there and it wasn’t going to slow me down. I managed to elbow her in the gut, and she doubled over, gasping for breath. I jammed my knee up to hit her in the face, but she’d already recovered and straightened out. She slammed into me and I lost my grip on the knife. It clattered away in the dark. I still had the Glock on me, but she wasn’t giving me time to draw it. She thrust out her arm faster than I’d seen her move before, grabbed my hair, and yanked it.
Pain shot through my head as I bent over backwards, trying to escape her grip. I fell to the floor, but she didn’t let up. She kicked me while I was down: in the ribs, in the stomach, two kicks to the head. I couldn’t think about moving anymore. I curled into a ball and let her kicks rain on me. There was nothing else to do but hope I survived.
After what felt like forever, she finally stopped. I lay there, curled in a ball, for a long time. I guessed she was gone, but I didn’t know for sure. Every bone in my body ached, and I knew from experience that I would have a whole collection of bruises. I was sure I was bleeding somewhere, too. I could feel the blood draining out of me, taking my energy, my strength, along with it.
I heard footsteps. I didn’t have the energy to face anything more, so I closed my eyes and let the darkness surround me. If it called me home, I would go.
I woke up in a blue room. The covers over me were heavy, and when I moved to get them off me, the pain made me groan. Everything hurt. It felt like I’d been dragged for miles. I couldn’t open my right eye all the way. I figured it would be bruised too.
I did a quick inventory. Nothing broken. I could deal with the rest of it.
“You’re up,” someone said from the doorway, and when I looked I saw Carlos standing there, leaning against the doorframe with his arms crossed over his chest.
“What time is it?” I asked.
Carlos frowned, but he looked at his watch. “Eight,” he said.
“Tuesday?” I asked. My worst fear was losing days. I couldn’t afford that.
But Carlos nodded. “You took quite a beating,” he said.
“She was here,” I answered, and swallowed. Talking hurt.
“I tried to tell you not to come. The masters were checking me out.”
“Am I going to get you in trouble?” “I think it’ll be okay. I’m pretty sure they think you’re dead. I thought you were dead when I found you.”
I pushed myself up and groaned.
“You really shouldn’t be up,” he said. “You can stay at least until you can move.”
“I can move,” I said, but it took everything I had to get myself out of the bed. “I have a training session at nine.”
“I don’t think that’s wise,” he said.
“And yet, you’re working for vampires and I’m killing people.”
He shut up because it was true.
“I owe you money,” I said.
Carlos shook his head. “Don’t worry about it. You got assaulted in my building. I think we can wait with that.”
I nodded… and regretted it. My head thumped painfully. I tried to stretch myself out. Everything ached. My ribs were badly bruised – I could feel it when I moved – and there was something wrong with my wrist. I couldn’t move my hand without it hurting.
“Maybe I’ll take it slow on the hand-to-hand combat today,” I said to Carlos.
He just shook his head.
It took me a full hour to make my way to the Academy, where Sensei was waiting for me. When he saw me, he raised his eyebrows. Then he put his hands on my shoulders, looking at me with a lot of worry on his face.
I was pretty sure I looked like hell. I could feel it.
“Want to tell me what’s going on?” he asked.
I lowered myself to the floor, slipping out from underneath his hands, and managed to lie down with Sensei standing over me like a towering sentry. I winced, moving around until I could lie flat on my back. Nothing hurt if I didn’t move.
“Not really,” I answered.
“Let me rephrase. Tell me what’s going on.” He sat down next to me, watching, and he clearly wouldn’t take silence as an answer.
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. A
nd then I told him – about my job, about Jennifer and her strange request, and my ridiculous act of kindness where I had saved the vampire I should just have killed. I told him about Ruben, the man who had been so arrogant I couldn’t stand him, but now that he was gone, I missed him. Aspen and Joel were lost to me; I was sure of that, and I might have dragged more people into this situation by going to Carlos and promising Carl he could have a hand in what was going on. Sonya was involved too, of course.
When I finished, there was a moment of silence. Sensei was just looking at me, and I wondered if he hated me now.
“You’ve been training to fight supernatural creatures all this time?” he asked. I nodded as well as I could manage, which wasn’t very well at all.
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Would you have believed me?”
“I would have trained you differently,” he said after a moment. “I don’t think you should train today, though.”
I chuckled, and a sharp pain shot through my chest. I groaned. “I didn’t really come here to train.”
“Then why did you come?”
I sighed, a lump rising in my throat. “You’re all I have left.” My voice was thick and my throat felt tight, like I was having an allergic reaction. Yeah, I was allergic. To grief. “Aspen and Joel might be dead by now. I’ve lost Ruben and Zelda, and I won’t be surprised if Sonya and Carlos turn up dead too. I just can’t…” I took a deep breath and blew it out again. “I can’t save everyone. I can’t save anyone.”
I blinked furiously, trying to get the tears that were stinging my eyes to go away.
“Can I ask you a question?” Sensei’s voice was soft and calm.
“What?” I asked.
“Why do you do it?”
“Kill vampires?”
He nodded.
“Because I have to make sure my sister is safe. My father… I can’t let it happen again.”
“You need help,” Sensei said.
“Yeah, thanks for that,” I snapped. Then I took a deep breath and forced myself to calm down. It was hard to be angry and aggressive with so many injuries. “You’re probably right, though.”
He chuckled. “I didn’t mean professionally, although I don’t think you’ve been handling it quite the way you should have. I meant that you need people who back you up so you can end this.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, you have friends who are willing to help you. So, let them.”
I pushed myself up and wiped my good eye with the back of my hand. “I can’t let more people sacrifice their lives for me. I’ve lost too many already.”
“Have you asked them?” he asked. “Maybe they want to do this for you.”
I shook my head, and Sensei got up and stood in front of me. He looked tall, from where I was sitting on the floor.
“I know I would,” he said, and smiled.
“Why?” I asked.
“Some things are worth fighting for.”
This was the second time in two days that someone had mentioned my worth. It was a difficult pill to swallow. Since the night my mother died, I’d figured I was worthless. It’s easy to flirt with death when you feel like you’re disposable.
“Come on,” Sensei said, and held out his hand to help me up.
“Where are we going?”
“You need real medication.”