“How so?”
He looks at me, dead in the eyes and as serious as all hell. “I’ve got material that’ll make your knees turn to jelly, the floor liquefy under your bare feet, and your virginity beg for my cock all on its own.”
I tuck a lock of hair behind my ear and try hard not to blush at the word ‘cock.’
“Wow,” I deadpan. “You’re so charming.”
Little did he know, his oh so cocky words have my kneecaps wavering.
“Wash,” he orders and I grab more body wash and scrub myself from head to toe. As he dries himself and saunters around his bedroom, I rake shampoo through the tangles in my hair and finish off. As I shut off the water, Kade returns in a pair of low slung sweat pants and drops a pair of my own on the bench.
“What, no shirt?” I ask, as I step out of the shower and reach for a towel. I wrap it around my body as quickly as I can to ward off his lingering stare.
“I’d prefer it if you didn’t wear a shirt.”
“And you think that’s a good idea?”
He folds his arms over his bare chest. The rises and dips of his muscles become prominent and I try hard not to stare at the ridges in his forearms. I’ve never seen a man that looks like him before… not one that makes me wish I was allowed to lick of my own accord.
“Absolutely not, but I’m not about to let you out of my sight.” He taps the sweat pants he left for me. “Dry yourself. Put the pants on and then come to bed.”
He walks off and I proceed to dry my body. When I’m done, I put on the pants and double knot the strings so the pants don’t fall down. In the bedroom, the only light comes from a small, orb-like lamp on Kade’s bedside table and as I approach, I try not to stare at Kade, who sits against the headboard, watching me. When I reach out for the bed, he switches off the light. In the darkness, I can breathe better and I allow my body to relax as I slip under the sheets. I keep my back to Kade and remain perfectly still while he finds a comfortable spot. I just didn’t expect that spot to be right against my back. Strange tingles sear over my scalp and down my spine as he slips his large arms around me and holds me close to his body. I feel my eyes widen and my body tense. This feels good, so good that it makes it bad. He’s a Fortunate, the reason for my sad existence. I try to pull away, but Kade tightens his grip and I lose my breath. The pressure threatens to crush my ribs.
“I want to hold you.”
When I relax, he loosens his grip. “Why?” I ask. “I thought you don’t do sweet?”
“It’s not sweet. Don’t talk.” He yawns into my hair. “Just sleep.”
As much as I’d like to sleep, I can’t. I’m hungry—painfully hungry, and having Kade pressed so firmly against me, holding me so tight isn’t exactly conducive to sleep. The more my body relaxes into his arms the sicker I feel. I shouldn’t feel what I’m feeling. I shouldn’t feel safe with him. Safe. Protection. Defence. All are temporary words in this world… all can be taken away at a moment’s notice. Regardless of that, as I lay here in his arms, I’ve never felt safer. I’ve never felt so free in my life.
After a small eternity, Kade lets out a peaceful sigh and his arm grows heavy. As he sleeps, I press myself back into him and pretend for the briefest moment that we don’t live in this world… that we live in the before time. I wonder what it would be like, what Kade would be like if society hadn’t groomed him to be this way. Would we have ever spoken? Would I still be attracted to him if he didn’t hold power over me? More importantly, would he be kinder? Sadly, it doesn’t matter. The thoughts are exactly that… just pointless words floating around my head. In this world, whether I like it or not, Kade is a Fortunate, he is my master. Underneath that title, he’s also my protector. He’ll keep his word and let me live freely with him when he has everything he wants, I know he will… I hope he will. As my eyes grow heavy and sleep is falling over the cusp of my eyelids, Kade throws a leg over me and lazily presses his lips to the brand on my shoulder. I find myself smiling, because in this moment, even in his sleep, he knows I’m his and his only.
Chapter Nine
Nine
The sound of cutlery clashing with porcelain is enough to stir me from my sleep. Squeezing my eyes tighter shut, I stretch my legs and arch my back. I stay that way until the pleasurable tingles cease to dance along my spine.
“Yes, Master Kade.”
Thirteen’s soft voice penetrates my skin and freezes my organs. In disbelief, I shoot up in bed. I move so quickly, the blankets slip from me and fall to the floor, leaving me clasping at my bare chest. Like a true Unfortunate, Thirteen doesn’t allow herself to be distracted. She carries on with her duties, serving breakfast on the coffee table. Sitting here like this, lying in my Fortunate’s bed in his pants while she’s doing her job makes me feel dirty… like I’m the worst person in the world. I don’t talk to her in fear of getting her into any trouble, so I watch instead. She looks like hell. Granted, all of her physical injuries seem to be healing extremely well, but her skin lacks colour and her beautiful, blonde curls lack bounce. For someone who has suffered at the hands of Vincent Sario, I’m surprised she finds the motivation to get up in the morning. The fact she does tells me that Thirteen, the girl I thought to be the weakest coming into this, is in fact the strongest of us all. Compared to her, I’m a coward. I hide behind my Fortunate and hope he keeps me safe. She doesn’t have someone like Kade to protect her. Finally, I open my mouth to talk to her, but the bathroom door opens and Kade steps into the room, adjusting a cuff on the sleeve of his shirt.
“That’s enough,” he tells her as she places the last strawberry into a bowl.
Thirteen grabs her large wooden tray and flees the room without a glance in my direction. I stare at the door, even long after she’s gone.
“Get out of bed,” Kade orders, lowering himself onto the couch, in front of the food. “We have a lot to work on this morning so come have breakfast.”
I slip from the bed and walk, covering my breasts, over to Kade. I sit on the floor across from him and fold my legs. The smell of maple syrup on pancakes floods my senses and my mouth pools. I’ve never tasted pancakes, only the syrup. A little while back, Portia spilled a drop on my dress and I couldn’t resist. I tasted it… and I’ve never tasted anything so glorious in my entire life. The sugar in that one little drop had my head buzzing for hours.
I pluck a slice of warm, buttered toast from the plate in the middle, but Kade sticks to the assorted berries and now that I think about it, he’s always eating berries.
“You like berries?”
He nods and sucks a small strawberry between his lips… never has a piece of fruit looked so good. The juice stains his lower lip and I can feel his eyes on my face as he uses his tongue to lick it up. I do my best not to stare at his mouth, but judging by the way his lips twitch knowingly, I guess I fail.
I clear my throat. “What are we working on this morning?” I ask, hoping to forget his lips.
“The usual.”
Oh. I take a bite out of my toast. I’m still no good at ‘seducing.’ Who would’ve thought a Fortunate needs to be persuaded into sex? We’re taught that it’s second nature to them. When they’re horny, we sate them. That’s it.
Even for a personal slave, they don’t teach how to please our Fortunate. They claimed everyone was different and we’d learn firsthand quick enough. Unfortunately for me (or fortunately, I haven’t decided yet), my Fortunate seems to be wired differently to the rest.
We eat in silence and I taste everything, from the pancakes to the juice, from the bacon to the hot bread rolls, right down to the smallest berries. I eat until my belly is full and stop only when I’m certain anything else will make my tummy explode. The whole time I ate, Kade watched me, amused with my reactions. I tried not to let it get in the way of my adventure.
“Are you ready?” It’s phrased as a question, but I get the feeling it’s not.
“Is that really a question?” I ask, despite my better judgement. “O
r do I have to be ready regardless of what I want?”
With the slightest smile, he straightens himself on the couch. “Stand up.”
I exhale and push myself to my feet. I’m hyperaware that I’m still topless, but I don’t cover my breasts. If he wants to see them, I can’t stop it. Besides, Kade has seen them more than enough times for me to be uncomfortable now.
“You need to straighten your posture.”
I roll my shoulders back and step forward, but Kade shakes his head and I stop.
“Your walk is too heavy. Try touching your toes to the floor first and don’t drop your heel. In fact, your heel should barely touch the floor. It sways the hips more and your legs will look longer.”
I do as I’m told and walk the way he wants me to. I feel stupid acting as if I’m wearing an invisible pair of high heels. When I get closer to Master Kade, his eyes rake me from head to toe and he drags his index finger slowly across his full, bottom lip, pondering something.
“The pants,” he says, his voice low and smooth. “They bother me. Take them off.”
I pause, my nervousness spiking. “Then I’ll be naked.”
Kade gives me a look, a look so cold I immediately pull at the strings and hook my fingers around the band of the pants. I drag the fabric down my legs and step out of them.
“Now try it again.”
I turn around and pace four steps away from Kade, then I turn back to him. He keeps his eyes on my legs and my feet as I walk—just like he wanted me to. His eyes thin as he slowly drags his tongue over his lip. “Good.”
My legs brush against his knees and my chest rises and falls quicker than I anticipated. It feels heavy, like my breasts are weighing me down all of a sudden.
Kade lifts his stare to mine. “When you touch me, it should be soft and smooth. Your movements must be calculated. In a single caress, you should know exactly where I like to be touched.”
I swallow hard and my beating heart begins to sound in my ears. I reach out for him, slowly, and his lips twitch as I draw closer to his stomach. As my finger grazes his jacket, his arm shoots out and his fingers clamp around my nipple.
“Ah!” I wince, pressing myself against his hand to get away from the burning pressure.
“If you’re going to touch me there your next move better be to unzip my pants.” He releases me and I gasp. It hurts more as blood rushes to the tip and I reach up to caress my nipple, but Kade smacks my hand away.
“Fuck!” I hiss and Kade’s eyes flare.
“Start high and then go low. You should touch my shoulders, my chest and my arms first, not my stomach.”
“I can’t do it.”
“Of course you can. It’s not hard.” He unbuttons his jacket, shrugs out of it and tosses it to the side. “You have to convince me that you have what I want, not assume.”
He takes my hands in his and presses them to his chest. “Here is a good start. Keep your palms slightly off, using only the tips of your fingers. Drag them lightly, up and over my shoulders.”
Under the tips of my fingers, Kade’s body is warm… and hard. I drop my gaze from his and focus on the way I move my hands—carefully keeping my palms off of him. Though I don’t look at him, I can feel him watching my face. It makes my hands shake and I survey the way my fingers tremble against the white cloth of his shirt. My heart pounds in an uneven, but spellbinding rhythm and in the tips of my fingers, I feel the faint pulse of his heart, too. This is just an exercise. I don’t understand why this is affecting me more than it’s affecting him. He’s probably used to being touched, unlike me. I’m not used to touching, either. I trail my fingers up over his strong shoulders and move along them, feeling all of the rises and dips. His shoulders are much too large for my hands to cover adequately, as is the rest of his body.
“Eye contact is important,” Kade states.
I drag in an inhale, hoping to pick up some courage, too. I don’t. If anything, the inhale makes me feel light-headed. Finally, I lift my gaze to his and the second our irises meet, he locks me in place. There’s no emotion on his face, only pure intensity. I don’t know how else to describe it. Whatever it is… it sends butterflies swirling around my belly and I hope it’s the food that’s making me feel funny and not developing feelings. To feel something other than loyalty to Kade would crush me. There’s no way I’d survive being in love with him and he’s making it hard for me to decipher what I’m feeling. I’m a little uncomfortable, having never been in this situation before, but I’m not scared. I’ve spent my whole life preparing for moments like this. I’m aroused, I can feel it rushing through my veins and pooling in the only area true pleasure can be drawn from, but I’m also disgusted. Not with Kade, no, but with myself. The fact that in this moment I want to push Kade down and force my mouth on his disgusts me. The fact that I want him to lick me from head to toe without a breath disgusts me, and the fact that I think I would let him have sex with me at the drop of a hat disgusts me beyond anything I’ve ever felt. I’m not the same person I was when I first arrived here. I’m not the same girl that only wanted to feel the soft grass between her toes… now I want to feel different things. Harder things.
I’m startled back to reality when I feel his hands on my bare hips. Heat seeps into my cheeks at the touch of his skin. His hands are hot and they ignite my skin as they slide around to the small of my back. His warm breath collides against mine as he brings his mouth closer.
“I want to try something,” he whispers against my lips. “But you have to trust me.”
I pull back and search his eyes. There’s no authority there, but the glistening anticipation I see makes me just as nervous. In spite of that, I know he won’t hurt me. He slips away from me and I remain still as he digs through a drawer in his bedside table. When he turns around, I zero in on the lacy, red cloth in his hands. My heart rate spikes and I take a step back, no longer caring about being graceful on the tips of my toes.
“Relax,” he orders in a smooth, calming tone.
I don’t relax, especially when he toys with it, wrapping it around his hands and letting it slip between his fingers. He swallows the distance between us and my legs lock in place. I’m unable to walk away, even if I wanted to, because there’s a teeny, tiny part of me that wants to see exactly what he has planned. I suck in a breath as he unravels the scarf and brushes the soft fabric against my nipples. They harden further and ache like nothing I’ve ever felt before.
“Will you let me cover your eyes?”
Do I have a choice? The longer I look at him, the more I believe that maybe, just maybe, he is giving me a choice. But if I say no, I’ll disappoint him. He approaches me. He keeps coming until his chest is almost flush against mine.
“Yes,” I answer, shocking even myself.
Kade drapes the scarf over my breasts and my breath hitches in my throat, deepening into a heavy pant. He begins to circle me, dragging the soft fabric up over my bare shoulder.
“You’re having difficulty with my lessons because you haven’t experienced pleasure. I’m going to give that experience to you and you can see for yourself just how powerful arousal is.”
“Wait.” I attempt to turn around, but his heavy hands whip to my shoulders, keeping my back to him, so I peer over my shoulder. “You’re going to touch me? There?”
He smiles a full smile, filled with perfect white teeth. “Yes.” I feel his lips against my shoulder and jump as he nips me with his teeth. “And I promise you’ll like it.”
Kade grabs the sides of my head and straightens it, so I’m no longer looking at him. Then, he covers my eyes with the scarf and I’m blind. He’s doubled it over so I can’t see a thing… and it scares the shit out of me. A cool breeze blows over my exposed skin when I realize I can’t feel him anymore, and goosebumps spring to life. Behind the lacy veil, I blink rapidly, trying desperately to see through it and figure out where the hell he is. It’s then I feel his warm palm glide over the curve of my ass. I gasp and jolt forward, only to
be caught by the palm of his other hand as he flattens it against my belly.
“I told you to relax.”
“I can’t. Shouldn’t I least see what you’re doing to me?”
He laughs once. “You know what I look like, imagine it.”
His hands fall away from me, taking his warmth with it and my entire body begins to tremble as I urgently try to foretell where I’m going to feel them next.
“You’re scared?” I jump at his low voice as it bounces around my head. I don’t know where he is… but I can feel the heat of his body crashing over me in waves. I nod my head minutely and not a second later, I register the slight touch of his fingertips as he tucks a lock of my hair under the fabric that shields my eyes.
“I want you to be scared…” His voice is close now and my skin buzzes as I feel his breath brush over my lips. “I want you to be petrified, so you remember the exact moment I take that feeling away from you and make you feel safer than you have ever felt in your life.”
His full lips graze across mine and I struggle for breath as my body hums with electric energy.
“This is the moment I replace your fear of me with lust. This is the moment you truly learn what it feels like to be touched, and I want you to learn… I want you to memorise as much of this as you can.”
Kade softly licks my top lip and soothingly kisses my bottom one. My heads swims and rolls with new thoughts and feelings as his lips skim over my cheek and right to my ear.
“I will not ask your permission for anything, if you don’t want me to touch you, take the blindfold off now and we can try again later. Once I start, I won’t stop until your body is shaking and you’re panting my name.”
His breath is a heady blow of anticipation against my flesh and it flows through me, igniting my blood. I bite my lip, stilling my trembling fingers against my thighs. A few small eternities pass and I swear I hear him smile against my earlobe.