Page 21 of Winter Door


  Suddenly a terrific starburst of pain filled with shocking heat and color struck her. She reached out and clung to the pain, knowing it was a lifeline back to her body. She clawed her way up, climbing the pain, feeling it more fiercely and welcoming it. Then, just as suddenly, there was no resistance, and she was slammed back into her flesh with such force that she woke gasping and aching all over. It was difficult to open her eyes, as if she had not made it all the way back into her body, but she forced her eyelids apart.

  Logan Ryder was peering anxiously into her face.

  Rage screamed.

  Logan jumped back, a look of such comical fright on his face that Rage started to laugh hysterically. Sitting up, she realized that she was lying by the fire and not in her bed. There was no Billy beside her, which opened the wound of sorrow.

  “Oh, Billy,” she said brokenly, and began to cry.

  “Jeez,” Logan murmured, sitting heavily on the nearest chair. “Is this the way you always wake up?”

  “You don’t understand,” Rage wept.

  “I guess not,” Logan admitted. “I tell you, Rage, getting to know you has been some roller-coaster ride. First there are those things that chased us, then I’m in the middle of a dream about hiking in the hills, and all of a sudden I’m dreaming I’m in that playground opposite the school and there’s you and this boy I never saw before but he thinks he knows me. You keep calling him Billy, like your dog. Then we hear those werepigs howling, and you and the boy Billy start talking all of this crazy stuff. Then you tell me to wake up and just like that, I do. That was weird enough.

  “I tried to call you the next day, but there was no answer. Then Mrs. Do-gooder tells me the power is out all over the area because of the storms, so I think that’s it. But then last night I dream of you again and this time you’re lost in a storm. So I start feeling like maybe the dreams are some kind of message and you really are in trouble. I called and called but no answer, and I think what the hell, the storms have stopped for now, so I hike out of town and boost this trail bike from a guy I know and come up here. It was a hellish ride and I nearly wiped out about ten times, but I finally get here. There’s no light but I hammer like crazy at the door, then I come round the house tapping on the windows.

  “All of a sudden Billy Thunder leaps through the curtain and bashes against the glass so hard it’s a wonder he didn’t smash it. I swear I nearly had a heart attack. He was barking like a maniac, and I thought at first he must be rabid, but then I saw his tail was wagging, and he runs to the door, and you’re not gonna believe this but he flips the latch from the inside and lets me in! Like Lassie or Flipper or something, and then he’s dragging at my leg. He herds me in here and you’re laying there like…Well, I come over and you weren’t breathing. I shook you and I called your name and finally, I got scared, and I slapped you. I guess you’ll have a bruise, but you groaned and started breathing. It was still hard to wake you, but then you do wake and scream and laugh and start crying all in about five seconds.”

  Rage was staring at him with open-mouthed astonishment. She had never heard him say so many words all together before! Then something in his amazing monologue penetrated her astonishment.

  “You said Billy…jumped at the window?” Rage whispered, hardly daring to move. Dimly she was aware that her cheek was throbbing.

  Logan nodded. Then he turned and looked around. “He was here just a second ago. Hang on.” He got up just as Billy hurtled through the kitchen door and ran straight at Rage like a catapult. He knocked her back and licked her face frantically, whining and barking and huffing. Rage hugged him and kissed him, weeping and laughing.

  “Wow,” said Logan, who was still standing. “This is too much. If you go on like this every time you see one another, I don’t know how you have the energy to do anything else in a day.”

  Rage started to laugh. She laughed so hard her stomach hurt, but she couldn’t stop. Logan ended up laughing, too, though he still looked confused. At last, Rage managed to gasp to a halt, and then she looked back at Billy, who had not taken his eyes off her face, and sobered abruptly.

  “You’re alive,” she told him, and she wrapped her arms around his neck and began to cry again. Not the wild tempest of tears she had first shed out of sheer joy and relief, but quiet, desperate tears, because she really had thought he had died. Hard tears, Mam always called tears like that because they felt like stones melting in you and running out.

  Logan came and knelt on the ground beside them. “Rage…,” he said helplessly, reaching out to pat her shoulder awkwardly. “I…what’s wrong? Can I help you?”

  Rage looked at him through puffy eyes and felt a wave of affection for him. No, not just of affection. Because he had come, and because he had been scared for her, and because it must have been him who woke Billy in time. He had saved Billy’s life, and it sounded as if he had saved her life as well, because for a while there she hadn’t wanted to live. It chilled her to admit that to herself, because maybe that was how Mam felt.

  “You have helped, Logan,” she said huskily. More tears threatened then, but she blinked hard and wouldn’t let them fall. “I guess you’d better try to call your foster parents to let them know where you are.”

  He nodded. “Yeah. I’ll tell them I came up with your uncle and that the storm means I have to stay the night. They’ll have a fit if I tell them about the motorbike. Where is your uncle?” he added. “Is it going to be okay with him that I stay?”

  Rage licked her lips. “He went off early yesterday morning and he didn’t come home last night or tonight, and he didn’t call, either.”

  “Maybe he couldn’t call because of the blackouts, and he couldn’t make it up here.”

  “You made it!”

  “Yes, but I was on a trail bike with snow spikes. Parts of the road were so narrow that only a bike could have come through.”

  “Maybe he called,” Rage said, but there was no conviction in her voice. “You phone your parents and I’ll make us something to eat. I guess you’re hungry?”

  “Does a dog bark?” Logan asked, and Billy gave a bark that made them both laugh. “He’s a pretty smart dog, isn’t he?” He went to the phone. “Hey, they could make a television show of him. Billy Thunder, Dog Wonder.”

  Rage looked at Billy and said softly, “You are a wonder, Billy, and I love you so much it hurts, so never, never do that again.” Billy licked her right on the mouth. “Yuck,” she said, and went to fill the kettle, trying to get her thoughts in order.

  She heard Logan give a self-conscious cough and realized he must have got through to his house. “Uh, it’s me, Mrs. Stiles. I’m at Rage Winnoway’s place….” Hestopped and listened. “She did? Oh yes, well, I called her again from town, and she said her uncle was in Hopeton, so I met up with him and he brought me up. Yeah, well, he was going to bring me down but it’s pretty bad weather. He thinks I ought to stay the night….” Another pause. “He’s next door at the moment, but I can get him to call when he comes back. Oh. Okay, then. Well, I’ll call you in the morning. Yeah, okay. Thanks. No, that’s okay. Yes. Thank you. I have to go now. Okay.” He gave Rage a look of exaggerated desperation and she smothered a laugh.

  “Okay, I will. Yes, I better go. Okay. Bye.” He hung up and rolled his eyes at Rage. “Boy, can she talk! She said you called yesterday.”

  “I called because I figured out that you called. She invited me to dinner sometime.”

  Logan looked pleased but embarrassed. Then his expression became thoughtful. “Look, Rage, do you have asthma or some sort of heart thing, because you were really not breathing, and when you started to wake up, you gave this great gasp like someone had been strangling you.”

  Very seriously, Rage said, “Logan, I’m fine, but I have to tell you that I don’t know if the Logan Ryder method of resuscitation will catch on.”

  He gave her a lopsided grin. “The truth is, I was so mad to think that my first-ever pal was going to cut out on me that I let you hav
e it. So remember, there is no way out once you have me as a friend. It’s a lifetime thing.”

  “Friendship forever,” she said, and felt warmed by the words. She turned to the sink and started getting out tea things. She made toast and opened a can of baked beans. She fed Billy, who ate hungrily. He did not take his eyes off her. She longed to be able to talk to him about all that had happened, but in this form, he could only listen.

  Over beans on toast that tasted delicious after the bland fare of Null, she found herself telling Logan about her uncle’s notebook entry.

  “So he really is leaving. I can’t believe he would just go without even leaving a note for you,” Logan said. “I know he took off years back, but he’s not a kid now.”

  “A man doesn’t have to be any more responsible than a child,” Rage said.

  “I know that better than anyone,” Logan said. “Just the same, your uncle Samuel didn’t seem the type to run out on you. But what do I know?”

  Rage laughed because he had slipped into the comical voice he had adopted when he had read the play.

  Over tinned pears and ice cream, they fell into a silence, which Logan finally broke by asking Rage if she believed you could dream things that were going to happen.

  “You think I might get lost in a snowstorm?” she asked, smiling.

  But he didn’t smile back. “It seemed so real, Rage. I really felt like it was more than just a dream.”

  “I think you can dream real things,” Rage said slowly.

  Logan turned to look into the fire, where the flames were now leaping against the sooty glass. “Have you ever heard of astral travel?”

  To Rage’s relief, the phone rang. “Don’t answer it,” she said quickly. “It might be Mrs. Somersby.”

  “What if it’s your uncle calling? Or my foster parents. I didn’t give them the number, but they could easily look it up in the phone book and call just to check with your uncle.”

  “We’ll hear who it is when the answering machine—” Rage began, then she stopped because the tape of her voice had ended. Mrs. Johnson was saying that she and Mr. Johnson were staying in town as he had suffered a mild attack. Could Rage be a dear and feed the fish, and they would call in the next few days. “My love to you both,” Mrs. Johnson ended, and hung up.

  “Your next-doors?” Logan ventured. Rage nodded and took their plates to the sink to wash. Logan came over and took the tea towel from the rack to dry. “You know, I didn’t tell you something yet. I didn’t know how to.” Rage looked at him. “When I was coming up here, I saw some of those things that chased us.” Rage’s pulse quickened. Had the Stormlord sent them after her? Her thoughts must have shown on her face because Logan said, “Rage, do you know something you haven’t told me about those things?”

  Rage looked over at Billy. “What do you think? Will I tell Logan everything?”

  Billy got up, walked over, reached up, and pawed decisively at her leg. Then he returned to the fire. Rage took a deep breath. “All right.” She let out a long breath and peeled off the pink latex gloves, hanging them over the edge of the sink. Logan was staring dumbfounded at Billy.

  “That was amazing. How did you train him to do that?”

  “I didn’t train him to do anything. That’s part of what I’m going to tell you. Let’s sit down.”

  Logan laid down the tea towel with an almost ritual air, then they both went to sit back by the fire. He took the chair and Rage curled up on the floor beside Billy, who settled his gaze on Logan. “It’s a long story,” she warned.

  “I haven’t got any appointments.”

  Rage sighed. “I guess I’m stalling a bit because now that I come to it, I’m kind of nervous about telling you.”

  “Telling me what?”

  “Something you’re going to find hard to believe.”

  “I have a very broad mind,” Logan promised.

  “Maybe,” Rage murmured. She took a deep breath and began to speak.

  The first thing Logan said when Rage finished was, “So you’re saying that was you in my dream?”

  “I’m saying that was you in my dream,” Rage said. “The part of you that travels in dreams, I mean.”

  Logan nodded at Billy. “And he was in the dream, only he wasn’t a dog?”

  “I told you, I called him into my dream just as I called you. And Billy can be human shaped when we dream-travel if I think of him that way.”

  “Could you make me a tiger?”

  “Logan, Billy was a human for a while, that’s why he can be that shape as well as a dog.”

  “This is pretty out-there stuff.”

  “I know.” Rage was disappointed.

  “The most far-out-there thing is that I actually believe you,” he continued, speaking more to himself than to her. “I mean, I want to believe you because it means there really is magic, and monsters and great quests and other worlds. Also, I don’t think you’re a nut or a liar who would make up such a far-fetched story and try to say it was real.”

  Rage wasn’t sure that came out to unqualified belief.

  Logan went on shyly, “Besides everything else, I want to believe it because in your story I come out as a bit of a hero.” He reached out and patted Billy. “I saved him, in your story.”

  Rage nodded, feeling herself flush. She had not told Logan that he had saved her as well because it meant admitting that for one awful, shameful moment she hadn’t wanted to live.

  “No wonder those monsters didn’t faze you after that black city and that evil head keeper.”

  “He wasn’t really evil,” Rage felt compelled to say. “And Fork isn’t black anymore. Now it’s—”

  “It’s in love with Elle.”

  “In love?” Rage gaped a little at him. “I didn’t say that.”

  Logan seemed not to hear her. “It must have fallen in love with her when she was helping it to fight the winter. She sounds pretty stunning. I wish I could meet her.”

  Logan suddenly sat bolt upright. “Wow, I’ve just had a thought! If you can take Billy Thunder dream-traveling, maybe you can take me!”

  Rage blinked at him. “I could, I think,” she admitted. “But I don’t know if I should. You see, I thought the wizard gave me the power but—”

  “He might still have done,” Logan broke in eagerly. “He didn’t actually tell you he didn’t, did he? Anyway, maybe you had the power all along but you just didn’t know it. Maybe your father was a wizard and you have wizard blood in you! You said you didn’t know who he is.”

  Rage flinched. “I don’t want to know who he is. It doesn’t matter to me. Anyway, you’re talking like this is a story in a book. I don’t have wizard blood. If I did, I would have been dream-traveling all along.”

  “Maybe not. This firecat thing could have been a sort of—what’s the word? A catalyst.” He looked impressed with himself.

  Rage couldn’t help but laugh. “It’s a catalyst, all right, but it never makes anything good happen.”

  “Well, what does it matter, anyway, how you got the power? You’re going to use it to go back to Null. I mean, you have to, right?”

  “Maybe I don’t have to,” Rage said slowly. “The wizard can tell Elle and the others everything I heard….”

  “But you’re supposed to be there for them to be able to shut the winter door? That’s what the witch queen said, right?”

  “Witch Mother,” Rage murmured.

  “Whatever. She said you were part of it.”

  “There were supposed to be eight other than me, but there were only seven, so—”

  “Maybe I am the eighth!” Logan looked elated. “I’ll go! I’ll fight alongside Elle and Thaddeus and the others. They’ll need everybody they can get if they are going to storm the castle.”

  “It’s a fortress, Logan, and no one’s going to storm it. There’s no need, now that the wizard is free.”

  “Yes, but they have to get the Stormlord out, too, so they can make him close the door. He’s the key, isn??
?t he?”

  “I don’t know how we can close the door. The wizard says there is no way.”

  “The witch Mother said there is a way, and besides, you have to go back so they can find out that Billy didn’t die.”

  “Logan, I can’t take you. I’ve only ever taken Billy, and if I try to take the three of us, it might go wrong. We might all end up somewhere else.”

  There was a silence, and outside the wind howled.

  Logan straightened up. “Okay, I’ll stay here. Someone should be here to watch over you two sleeping beauties. But you have to go.”

  “I know,” Rage said. “But after what almost happened to Billy, I guess I’m scared.”

  “You’d be dumb if you weren’t,” Logan said. “But I bet that Elle will have figured out a plan by now, her and the wizard.”

  “I hope so.” She took a deep breath. “I guess we’d all better stay in Uncle Samuel’s room tonight. It’s solid brick, and if those things come again, they won’t be able to break in. We’d better push the wardrobe against the window. And we should take in a thermos of drink and something for you to eat, too. And candles and something to read…. Oh. Sorry, Logan.”

  He gave her a lopsided grin. “I’ll practice. Maybe I’ll surprise you.”

  Rage gave him an impulsive hug. “After this is over, I promise I will take you dream-traveling if I can.”

  “It’s a date,” Logan said lightly, then he flushed. “I mean, I didn’t mean…”

  “Come on,” Rage said.

  It took them an hour to get the extension ready. Logan had a mattress with piles of bedding, a portable radio, and candles. Billy and Rage would sleep on Uncle Samuel’s bed. They had a thermos of hot coffee, sandwiches, biscuits, and a couple of apples. Finally, they banked up the fire in the kitchen. Then they sat talking in front of it, because there was no point in lying down to sleep if they were wide awake. But Rage didn’t think it would be too long before she slept because she was already drained by all the emotions she had experienced.