Page 24 of Consequences


  He smiled. “Yes, this entire night has been leading to this proposal. I have watched you with me, in private and public, with my closest friends, and I want you there always. I love you.”

  Again, internal debate: Love? He keeps using that word. Love, do I love him? I think I do. When did that happen? Oh my, Claire needed to think about this. The napkin thing happened too quickly, this needed contemplation. “Please let me think. I promise you an answer soon.”

  He waited patiently. The carriage steadily moved through the cold crisp air. She saw her breath as she looked at her hand and at Tony. She thought about his patience as she healed from her injuries, about him risking public exposure with Dr. Leonard, about how he made her feel when she saw him walk into a room. Her contemplation took a while. They sat back in the carriage. She rested her head on his shoulder and thought. He didn’t say a word, he didn’t push. He held her hand.

  She could decide to leave and do what? Go back to Atlanta. Did she still have an apartment? He waited. There was a side of him that frightened her, but the idea of living without him frightened her more. She needed him. He told her that. Most importantly, she loved him, she really did. Sometime during the last eight months he’d become her everything. She couldn’t imagine life without him. Finally, she answered, “God help me, yes. Tony, I will marry you. I love you too.” He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her tenderly. She laid her head back on his shoulder as the carriage continued through the park. Claire looked again at her left hand.

  “If you don’t like the ring we can look at others. It is from Tiffany’s. We can go Friday and exchange it.”

  “Oh no! I love the ring. Besides, you chose it. It is exquisite. I am just so surprised.” She thought of something. “Does Catherine know you were planning this?”

  Tony said she suspected, but he hadn’t told anyone. He didn’t know her response. “I never go into a meeting that I don’t know the outcome of. I am always prepared for every situation. Tonight I wasn’t sure. You asked about your debt being paid a few months ago. I thought that perhaps you would take that option.” He leaned down to kiss her hair. “I can’t tell you how happy I am that you didn’t. I know Catherine will be too.”

  When the carriage arrived back at Seventh Avenue, Eric had the limousine warm and waiting. As Tony helped Claire down from the carriage and led her to the car, he told Eric, “My fiancée and I are ready to go back to the apartment.”

  “Yes, sir. Congratulations, Mr. Rawlings, and to you too, Ms. Claire.”

  That night after some of the most wonderful lovemaking Claire ever experienced, she began to consider the fact that she was getting married and that meant a wedding. “I don’t know how to plan a wedding to someone like you.”

  “Someone like me?”

  “You know what I mean. This isn’t your everyday Indiana or Iowa wedding. You are Anthony Rawlings. We can’t go to dinner without photographers. A wedding will be a national spectator event.”

  He chuckled. “My dear, that is what wedding coordinators and planners are for. We will hire the best. They will assist in everything.” That made her feel better. She wondered if the wedding was a catastrophe, wouldn’t that be a public failure? “By the way, how do you feel about a Christmas wedding?”

  Her mind went into overdrive. “Christmas? As in four weeks from Friday?”

  “I can’t wait any longer than that to have you be my wife, Mrs. Anthony Rawlings.”

  She knew from experience his mind was made up. With queasiness deep in the pit of her stomach, she said, “I feel that you must hire the world’s best wedding coordinator and planner.”

  Claire tried to sleep but the panic of planning a wedding in four weeks made her suffocate. She lay next to her fiancée and attempted to make sense of everything. Maybe she needed to compartmentalize, one thing at a time: wedding, reception, dress, and maid-of-honor. “I would like Emily to be my matron-of-honor.”

  He was almost asleep. “We can discuss it tomorrow. Good night.”

  “Good night.”

  This is the finest measure of thanksgiving:

  a thankfulness that springs from love.

  —William C. Skeath

  Chapter 25

  They talked into the early morning about the wedding. Therefore, Thursday morning, Claire slept soundly until after nine. Sensing that she was alone in the big bed, she focused her gaze on her left hand. On the fourth finger was a spectacular engagement ring. Smiling, she marveled at the reality; it wasn’t a dream. She was really marrying Anthony Rawlings.

  Until last night, Claire hadn’t allowed herself to think of Tony in terms of emotions or endearments. She knew she was having feelings, but she wouldn’t let herself elaborate. However, when he said he loved her, it opened a floodgate. She thought about her feelings and how she missed him when he’s gone. How she enjoyed having him around to talk with. How he could make her feel special, and how she thought about him when they were apart. She realized, to her own amazement, she really did love him! She couldn’t contain her smile; this revelation was so astounding!

  Claire wrapped herself in a thick long robe and walked downstairs to the dining room. As she approached, the rich poignant aroma of fresh coffee filled her lungs and brought her senses to life. Jan had coffee warm and ready for Claire. Tony wasn’t there either. “Mr. Rawlings is in his office, Ms. Claire. And if I may? Congratulations.”

  “Thank you, Jan. I’m sorry you have to work on Thanksgiving,” Claire offered as Jan poured her coffee.

  “It is all right, miss. I am looking forward to having guests this afternoon for dinner. We rarely entertain here.”

  “Guests? I am sorry. If Mr. Rawlings mentioned guests, with the excitement of our engagement, I’ve forgotten. Do you remember who is joining us for Thanksgiving dinner?”

  “I am sorry. I don’t believe he told me names. I know there will be two, and they are scheduled to arrive at one thirty.”

  Jan convinced Claire to eat an English muffin and grapefruit. After breakfast, Claire went to Tony’s office. She could hear him speaking behind the closed door. She may be his fiancée, but interrupting him uninvited in his office didn’t seem like a good idea. Perhaps some rules would change, but she decided that he would choose which ones. She went back to their bedroom, showered, and thought about how glad she was she’d bought new clothes. If she needed to be the perfect companion for some business associates, she felt better in well-fitting clothes. She decided on a black pair of wool slacks and a pink knit sweater that came from Neiman Marcus. The black boots had high heels, Tony wouldn’t seem as tall. Dreamily, she thought about fuzzy socks and her new hoodie—being Mrs. Rawlings would teach her to keep up appearances. Actually, being Claire Nichols had taught her that.

  As she straightened her hair, she marveled at the new even lighter shade. The auburn showed through enough to be considered low lights, but she was definitely a caramel blonde now. Although Catherine packed many pieces of Claire’s new jewelry, she wanted to wear her grandmother’s necklace and the O earrings Tony brought her from Europe. She shook her head; that seemed so long ago. Once she was completely dressed, she relaxed on the bed and let her mind wander.

  Internal monologue: I’m going to marry Tony. I’m going to marry Tony in four weeks. I need a wedding dress. I need to call Emily. There were guests coming to dinner. Perhaps after dinner I can approach the Emily subject with Tony. Where will we marry? Who will we invite? Suddenly, a nice destination wedding anywhere seemed like a good idea.

  Then her mind went from the wedding to Thanksgiving. She could hardly believe it truly was Thanksgiving. She’d arrived at Tony’s house on March 20. Now she’d be eating Thanksgiving dinner with him and some associates and planning her wedding. She imagined drowning in chocolate sauce, too much of a good thing!

  As a means of escape she let her mind float to childhood Thanksgivings. They usually went to her grandparents’ home, where Grandma made all the traditional foods. She remembered helping h
er grandma and mother bake pies. At Thanksgiving they usually had pumpkin, apple, and sometimes pecan pie, and always too much food. Even when she lived with Emily and John she baked pies and helped Emily with cooking. Part of her wanted to go down to the kitchen and offer to help. But she knew that wouldn’t be appropriate.

  She was somewhere deep in her memories when Tony entered the bedroom. He wore slacks and a burgundy ribbed turtleneck sweater which looked wonderful stretched across his broad shoulders and chest. He wore suits so often. Claire liked seeing him in something other than a jacket and tie. He smiled and joined her. “Good morning, my fiancée.” He kissed her lips. “How are you feeling today?”

  Claire propped herself up. “Good morning, to my fiancé, I feel well. I was just thinking about Thanksgivings when I was young. Did you eat all the traditional Thanksgiving foods when you were young?”

  He sat next to her on the edge of the bed. “Claire, don’t talk about the past. We have a future ahead of us, let’s look ahead.”

  “I’m sorry, I guess I’m reminiscing.” She touched his arm. “Tony? Who is coming to dinner?”

  “First, let me tell you . . .” his voice was brimming with excitement, “I have been on the telephone all morning. Patricia is going to contact Shelly, and a statement regarding our engagement will be released tomorrow. Also, you have an appointment tomorrow at a very exclusive bridal boutique in Manhattan for a wedding gown. They are expecting you, the future Mrs. Anthony Rawlings. They want to meet your every need.” He kissed her lips and continued to hold her gaze with his chocolate brown eyes. “I want you to have the dress of your dreams. Patricia will also choose a wedding planner and coordinator to meet with us when we return to Iowa. Since Christmas is on a Saturday, the wedding will be December 18, which too is a Saturday. I hope you don’t mind, but with the wedding only three weeks away I decided to have it at the estate. Now we don’t have to worry about booking some place, and security is already set. We just need to decide how many guests and where on the estate to hold the ceremony and reception. I did reach Catherine. She is thrilled, and told me to tell you so.”

  Claire felt inundated, information overload! She laid her head back on the pillow. “Maybe this is all happening too fast.” Tony didn’t say anything, but his smile became subdued. “It isn’t that I don’t want to marry you, I do. But three weeks, that seems very rushed.”

  He scooped her into his arms. “I promise you, money can make anything happen. Don’t worry about it. We will marry on December 18, and it will be amazing.”

  “I just worry about disappointing you.”

  “Claire, this is your wedding. I want you to be happy. I also know you are not back to yourself. I don’t want you to overdo. Just enjoy all the things your money can buy and watch the wedding take shape. It will be spectacular.”

  “My money can’t buy us a piece of gum.”

  He laughed and kissed her. “My dear, in three weeks and two days you will be able to buy a gum factory if you want. I want you to share all that I have. You will have everything the world has to offer.”

  Claire struggled with the meaning of his words. “Tony, I don’t want your money. I have not done anything to deserve part of your fortune. I’m happy to share your name, I don’t need any more.”

  “My love, you have done more than you will ever know. And I am pretty sure you will do more.” He leaned down to kiss her, and his hands were busy with the buttons on her slacks.

  “Don’t we have guests coming?”

  “They aren’t due until 1:30. I am pretty sure we can be successful multiple times before then.” He removed her slacks and started removing her sweater. He straddled her legs as he removed his sweater and undid his slacks. His smile was seductive and his chest moved with his breaths of anticipation. Claire could smell his cologne and knew that if he bent down she would taste the scent on his neck.

  “But, Tony—” He put his finger to her lips.

  “Shhh, I have better things for those beautiful lips to do than talk.”

  They left the bedroom together just before 1:30, and Tony spoke. “I am sure you realize, but I am going to say it for the sake of clarification. Just because we are engaged, divulging private information is still forbidden.”

  Claire looked up at his eyes and wondered what he possibly thought she would say to his associates. “I promise I know that.” They continued to the front stairs, where muffled voices could be heard from the sitting room. “Now who am I meeting?” As she asked, the voices came into range, her eyes moistened, and she looked to Tony for confirmation. “Is it really them?”

  He gently held her shoulders, “Yes, I invited them to surprise you for Thanksgiving but now you have even bigger news to share.”

  “I can tell them about our engagement?”

  He smiled. “Of course, didn’t you say you wanted Emily to stand with you?” She wanted to run down the stairs or cry out, but his grip on her hand tightened. “Claire, follow my rules.”

  “I will.”

  When the soles of their shoes hit the marble floor, John and Emily turned toward them. They’d been enjoying the view from the sitting room windows. Her family looked just as Claire remembered: John tall with dark blond hair and playful blue eyes, and Emily with the Nichols brown hair, cut short and sassy, and Claire’s sparkling green eyes. Claire ran to Emily and hugged her.

  “I didn’t know you were coming. It is a wonderful surprise. Oh, Emily, it is so good to see you!” And then she hugged John. “And, John! Oh, let me introduce you to Anthony.”

  Emily told Claire it was good to see her too. However, she and John made eye contact, sharing an expression of concern. Claire looked so different. They proceeded politely as Claire made introductions. “Anthony, this is my sister Emily. And, Emily, this is my fiancé Anthony Rawlings.” Emily and Tony shook hands. Anthony emitted charm.

  “Very nice to meet you, Mr. Rawlings.” Her brain made sense of Claire’s words. She looked at her sister in disbelief. “Did you just say fiancé?”

  Claire continued with introductions, “And, Anthony, this is Emily’s husband, my brother-in-law John Vandersol. John, please meet my fiancé Anthony Rawlings.” The two men shook hands and exchanged greetings.

  Gracious as ever, Tony said, “Please, we are about to be family. Call me Anthony.” Claire smiled and they all sat down to chat before dinner. Jan entered the room to offer some hors d’oeuvres and drinks. Claire showed Emily her engagement ring and told them about his romantic proposal in Central Park. John and Emily were speechless, perhaps in shock. Tony was very attentive, holding her hand, putting his hand on her shoulder or thigh. Claire rambled on, cautious to not divulge any personal information.

  During Thanksgiving dinner, Claire learned Emily had attempted to reach Tony around her birthday. She didn’t know what else to do. She had no way to reach Claire, and she saw pictures of the two of them together in magazines. Apparently, it is not easy to get calls or e-mails through to Anthony Rawlings. Just recently an e-mail finally reached him and he had called. It was during a telephone conversation about a week ago that Anthony invited them to NYC for dinner.

  Claire apologized for her inconsiderate behavior. She should have done a better job staying in touch. Life had been a whirlwind since she started working with Tony. The important thing was that they were together now. She asked them if they were driving home to Troy tonight or staying in the city. John said they decided to spend some time in the city, after all it was a three-hour drive home.

  Tony then surprised Claire again. “Well, Emily, Claire has a reservation tomorrow at a bridal boutique in Manhattan. I am sure she would love to have you join her to look at wedding dresses.”

  Claire tried not to stare at him. She looked to Emily. “Yes, I would love to have you join me if the two of you don’t have plans.”

  Emily looked at John. “Of course, I would like to help you.”

  “Emily, I would also like you to be my matron-of-honor. Would you please
stand with me at our wedding?”

  “You want me? Of course, I will.” Emily sounded cautiously enthusiastic. “But did you say the wedding will be the eighteenth of December?”

  “Yes, it will be. That is all the more reason to find some dresses soon.” Claire smiled at her sister. “Hopefully they will have some bright pink puffy bridesmaid’s dresses.” Emily laughed.

  From her peripheral vision Claire could see Tony’s fleeting expression of disbelief. She turned to her fiancée and smiled. “Tony, it is a long-standing joke. Emily made me wear a green dress at her wedding. Since pink is my favorite color, I have long threatened to have her wear the puffiest bubblegum pink dress I could find when I married.” He exhaled and smiled, relieved she wasn’t serious.

  Once they finished eating Tony invited John to the living room for the four o’clock football game. He asked the ladies if they would like to join them, but Emily said she would rather catch up with her sister. Tony kissed Claire before leaving the room. It appeared very sweet, but Claire saw the warning in his eyes.

  Jan poured the ladies coffee and cleared the table. Claire and Emily sat at the table, drank coffee, and tried to catch up. Once they were alone Claire knew the conversation would be more difficult to dodge. Emily was full of questions. How was her little sister, a meteorologist in Atlanta, suddenly engaged to one of the wealthiest men in the country? How did they meet? Where has she been living? Why hasn’t she been in contact? Why is she so thin? Why is her hair blonde? Did she really like living this way, being waited on and having house staff do everything? She always liked cooking. Now she says she hasn’t cooked, why? What is Anthony like? Why were they marrying so fast? Is she pregnant? Wasn’t he much older than her? Did she love him?