I’m so freaking jealous I can’t stand to be next to myself. And I’m also pissed off that I got her those flowers.
Maybe the dance thing isn’t such a good idea. It’s a drag watching this emotional train wreck in action.
How can Rhiannon not know this was the worst possible idea?
On my way to class, I’m relieved I just went to the computer lab for lunch again. But I’m having this evolving conversation in my head that I can’t get out of. It’s taking place in this alternate universe where she didn’t write on the sidewalk. And where she doesn’t give a hang about Steve anymore.
The latest version goes something like this.
Me: I can’t believe you ever went out with that guy Steve.
Her: I know. I must have been deranged.
Me: That’s what I’m saying. No offense.
Her: Steve is the worst.
Me: Steve is a dumbass.
Her: Steve is the worst kind of dumbass.
Me: Word?
Her: Totally.
Me: Nice.
Her: Do you want to move tables and talk about that new computer program you’re working on? It sounded fascinating before.
Me: Let’s go.
As I pass a poster that says, DANNY TRAGER FOR PRESIDENT. HE STILL LIKES FRUIT ROLL-UPS, a girl coming out of the cafeteria bumps into me. She’s talking to her friend about something that just happened at lunch. Involving Steve. And Rhiannon.
And Gloria.
I’ve heard some rumors going around, but I didn’t really believe them. Because how can they be an item already? But now it sounds like they are.
Jeez. The girl moves lightning fast. It’s almost like how she approached me last month when I was with Jessica.
For some reason, Gloria and Jessica had a fight. All I know is, it wasn’t Jessica’s fault. Gloria came out of nowhere, accusing Jessica of spreading some rumor about her. But Jessica had no idea what she was talking about. And no one even heard that rumor, so Gloria definitely made up the whole thing as an excuse to get mad at Jessica. And then she approached me.
I was in the computer lab after school, trying to finish this endless research paper. Gloria came in and sat at the computer next to me. At first I didn’t even notice her. But then she started laughing.
So I said, “What’s so funny?”
“Nothing,” she told me. But she kept laughing.
“I wasn’t aware that nothing could be so funny,” I said.
“Listen to this.” And then she read this joke that someone had e-mailed her. It was actually really funny, so we were laughing at it together. I tried not to look at her breasts.
“Anyway,” she said. “I hear you’re going out with Jessica.”
“Yeah.” I focused on the computer screen.
“How’s that going?”
“Good. You know. Great.”
“Which is it? Good or great?”
“Both. It fluctuates.”
Gloria laughed. “I never knew you were so funny.”
“Neither did I.” I tapped some random keys on the keyboard. I hoped this wasn’t going where I thought it was.
But apparently it was already there, because then she said, “Well, if it’s ever less than good . . .” And she pulled my hand toward her and wrote her number on my palm.
“I have a girlfriend,” I said.
Gloria leaned over and put her lips against my ear. She whispered, “I don’t care.” And then she just walked out. Like she didn’t just disrespect Jessica by trying to steal me away. Like she didn’t just disrespect me by dissing my girlfriend.
It’s all so messed up.
When Rhiannon comes into Wash World, I almost don’t recognize her. She shakes off her umbrella, but it’s raining hard and she looks frazzled. And her eyes look different. Defeated.
She sees me sitting on the couch, waiting for a wash to finish. Her sneakers slosh and squeak as she comes over.
“Hey,” she says.
“Hey.” I’m really surprised she’s here. I left her a message, so I thought she’d just call back whenever. I actually wanted to leave her a few messages so she’d know I was worried about her. But I’m sick of playing that game. If she wants to talk to me, she can come to me.
And here she is.
The dryer dings.
Rhiannon’s like, “I, um. Are you mad at me or something?”
“No.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah.”
I go over and take the clothes out, piling them on the folding table. I start folding stuff. Rhiannon just stands there, watching me.
The truth is, I’m furious. Which is mad annoying when you combine it with being concerned. But mostly I’m angry. Because why is she doing this to herself? Why do girls always go for the ass-holes who treat them like dirt?
I’m trying to be strong. Strong and detached. All folding clothes.
But then she comes over and stands behind me and hugs me. I feel her cheek pressing against my back.
“You want me to wait with you?” she says. The clothes are all folded and I’m waiting for another load of wash to finish.
“Yeah.”
So we sit on the couch. She rests her head against my shoulder.
And eventually, my anger just melts away.
I notice the rain has finally stopped. “Tell you what,” I say. “Why don’t I put the clothes in the dryer and we can go for a walk?”
“You can’t just leave your clothes like that.”
“Why not?”
“It’s against Wash World regulations.”
“Says who?”
Rhiannon points to a huge sign. It says: DO NOT LEAVE CLOTHES UNATTENDED IN MACHINES.
“Oh,” I say. “Right. That’s okay, though. I have special permission.”
“From who?”
“That is top secret information.”
“Ah.”
Walking down the zigzag streets of our neighborhood, we can see in people’s windows with no problem. So we just do that for a while, pointing out the wild palm trees and spiral staircases in all these sick apartments. And then we’re standing in the middle of a really quiet street. And suddenly I realize I should do the thing I wanted to do before.
“Hey, so . . .”
“Yeah?”
“About that dance. You know. On Friday?”
“Yeah?”
“I was thinking . . . it might be cool if we go together . . . as, like, a group thing. I mean . . . if you want . . .”
“Oh. With who?”
“Danny and . . .” I can’t exactly tell her that Danny wants to ask Nicole. Rhiannon would definitely tell her before Danny gets a chance to ask. “I’m not sure. Whoever he’s taking.”
“Sure. That sounds like fun.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
“Nice.”
“Oh!” Rhiannon yells.
“What?” Did she figure out I’m full of it? That the group thing is bogus?
“Check out that stained-glass window!”
I relax. Apparently, she doesn’t know how I really feel.
CHAPTER 20
Thursday
I KNOCK ON the lighting-booth door. Miguel lets me in.
“Dude,” I go.
“What’s good.”
“Everything ready for tomorrow?”
“Yeah. It’s all set.”
“Nice.” I look around at all of the lighting controls. “Just like we talked about?”
“Exactly.”
“Okay. So here’s how it’s going down.”
Sheila and Brad are fighting in the hall again.
They’re too far away to hear what they’re saying. Except for two things. At one point Sheila yells, “That’s the last time you say you’re sorry, because you’re done!”
Then Brad talks all low. You can tell from his body language that he’s trying to persuade her about something. A lot of kids are standing around. Some of them are trying to b
e all undercover about it, but others are blatantly staring.
I hear Sheila say, “It’s over.” And she storms off.
She rocks. I tell everyone about it at Westville.
“Finally,” Rhiannon says. “I can’t believe how much he changed her!”
“I know!” Nicole agrees. “How scary was that?”
“I wonder what was really going on between them, you know? Like how a person lets that happen.”
Nicole looks like she’s about to say something. But then she doesn’t.
After we tell Rhiannon about the plan for Gloria’s enlightenment, there’s a debate about involving Jackson.
“It’s not fair to him,” Rhiannon worries.
“Are you kidding?” Danny says. “Do you have any idea how much it’ll improve his street cred when everyone finds out a hottie like Gloria was into him?” Then he cringes. “Sorry.”
But Rhiannon just says, “No, I get it.”
“And think about it,” Danny pushes on. “Why was Jackson carrying around the note in his binder like that?”
“What do you mean?” I say.
Danny goes, “It just seems like . . . I don’t know, maybe he wanted someone to find it. Like what—it just falls out of his binder? And he doesn’t even notice when he gets up?”
“Hey yeah,” Rhiannon says. “That was sort of weird.”
“If I had a note like that and I wanted to keep it a secret, there’s no way I’d bring it to school,” Nicole adds.
“What are you saying?” I ask. “That Jackson wanted someone to find it?”
Nicole goes, “I don’t know. Maybe.”
“Oooh,” Danny says. “Scandalous.”
We keep debating about it. I can’t tell yet if Rhiannon will go for it, but I think she will. Because I get the feeling she wants to finally stand up for herself, too.
There isn’t a lot of time before I’m supposed to pick up Rhiannon and get back to school by seven thirty. So I tell Danny to hurry up with the master copy.
He thought it would be more effective to title the note instead of just copying it. Something to get people’s attention. Something that summarizes what this is about. So Danny, the relentless Beatles fan, decided to title it INSTANT KARMA! He’s typing that now. Then we’re going to arrange that page with the note on the copier glass.
“Done,” Danny announces. He snatches the paper from the printer. “We’re in.”
“Let’s just get this copied and get out of here.”
“What’s the rush? Got a hot date?”
I glare at him.
At this Kinko’s, two out of the five copy machines are usually out of order. Like they are right now. Which of course would happen when we need them the most. Just my freaking luck. We should have gone to the other Kinko’s. But that one’s farther away and we didn’t really have time. And we can’t make the copies at Carl’s dad’s place, because his dad can’t know what we’re doing. There’s a chance we could sneak it in, but it’s not worth the risk. Even if he offered to do them for free.
There’s a middle-aged guy in a suit hogging one of the machines. Who should obviously be doing these copies at the office. The other two machines have girls on them.
Mr. Inappropriate Alert Guy should be here to tell everyone to get the fuck off the machines.
“Should we go to the other Kinko’s?” Danny asks.
“Let’s just wait. One of them should be done soon.”
The girls are laughing over some story they’re yelling between them. Which is making everything take way longer, because they’re not paying attention to what they’re doing. They copy a page, and then they’re all talking and laughing so they don’t notice the copy is done, and at this rate we’ll never get a machine. Plus it looks like they’re copying entire notebooks. As if that weren’t annoying enough, I notice someone else was waiting before us. He gives us a look like, I was here first. So don’t even think about it.
I shift from one foot to the other.
“How many copies are we doing again?” Danny says.
“A thousand.”
“So that’s like . . .”
“A hundred bucks. I got it.”
“Since when? You’re Mr. PermaBroke.”
“Yeah well. Not today.” The truth is, I took the money out of my savings. Which is supposed to be exclusively for college. But drastic times and all.
I shift onto my other foot.
Now the girls are laughing so hard one of them drops her notebook. It smacks onto the tiles. Random pages spill across the floor. This makes them crack up even harder.
“Dude,” Danny says. “We need to stage an intervention.”
“Now would be a good time for that.”
The thing about Danny is that brainy chicks love him. When he goes into flirt mode, no girl with at least half a brain cell stands a chance.
It doesn’t exactly suck to be him.
I watch as he approaches the girl who glanced at him when we came over. His strategy is flawless.
As soon as he says something to her, she’s hooked. He has her laughing harder than she was with her friend in under ten seconds. Then he tones it down a little, moving closer to her. I see him touch her arm. A minute later, she moves over to the other machine with her friend. Danny waves me over.
The guy who was in front of us gives me the evil eye. I smile and shrug like I had nothing to do with it. He scowls. For a second I worry that there’s going to be some major confrontation. But then the suit finishes up on his machine, so we’re saved.
“Incredible,” I tell Danny.
“As always.” He lifts the cover of the copy machine and lines the note up evenly on the glass.
“What did you say to her?”
“Not much.” Danny pulls out the paper drawer. I hand him a ream of colored paper I bought before. “Just how you’re desperate to make a certain girl really happy. And how making these copies is essential for your somewhat questionable success.” He rips the cover off the paper. “And how it would mean a lot to me if she could help us out.” Danny looks over at her and winks. She giggles.
“Thanks, man.”
“Don’t mention it.”
The copies look great. With a thousand of these, we’re going to cover the entire school with no problem.
After we put the second ream in, the girl comes over. She goes, “Danny, right?”
“Right. Kim.”
“You remembered!” She giggles again. She attempts to pull her T-shirt down. Which is pointless since it barely covers her belly button.
“Of course I did,” Danny says, all smooth. “What do you think I am?”
“I don’t know!” She looks over her shoulder at her friend. Who’s trying desperately not to crack up. “Yeah so . . . where do you go?”
“Eames Academy. And this is James. He goes there, too.”
“Isn’t that the design school?”
“Yeah. Well, it’s supposed to be. You know how it is.”
“Totally. We go to Environmental Studies? And it’s so not for that.”
“Word?”
“Yeah. It’s so lame. There’s, like, two environmental electives and that’s it.”
“Drag.”
Kim looks over her shoulder again. Her friend apparently finds the whole thing so hilarious she can’t even look at us anymore. “Um, so, anyway . . . I’ll just . . . be over there.”
Danny’s all, “I’ll be watching.”
I check the screen. The copies are almost done.
“You interested?” I ask.
“In?”
“Kim, yo.”
“Nah. Just having fun.”
“She’s cute.”
“Yeah, but I think she has a boyfriend.”
“She told you that?”
Danny shakes his head. “Just a feeling.”
But I know the real reason. All he can think about is Nicole.
That’s the thing about being hooked on a girl. You see what els
e is going on around you. You notice other girls. But it doesn’t register the same way it used to. You only care about one thing, one goal. And sometimes, being so focused on what you want, you can’t see what everyone else does.
“I’m doing it,” Danny says. He tapes a copy of the note on the wall above the water fountain.
“Doing what?”
“Asking Nicole to the dance.”
“Nice.”
I tape copies on some lockers. Danny moves to the other side of the hall to get the lockers over there.
“So here’s my angle. Tomorrow night’s all about doing this like a casual thing.”
“Copy that.”
“And after I blow away the entire school with my unbelievably impressive speech, I’ll be getting some definite attention.”
“Affirmative.”
“But I won’t push it too far. You know, keep it real light. See if we can hang as friends first. And then we’ll get back together.”
We tape up more copies.
Danny’s like, “And I’m calling that chick from Millennium for you.”
I stop taping. “No.”
“Dude. What’s the problem?”
“I told you I didn’t want to be fixed up.”
“Why not?”
“I don’t want to get into a whole thing with some other girl right now.”
“But that’s such a lame reason.”
I glare at him.
“She’s hot,” he says. “You’ll see.”
“No I won’t, because you’re not calling her.”
“Why not?”
If I just come right out and tell him I asked Rhiannon, he’ll still want to set me up. But there might be a way to work this so Danny drops it.
“You’re playing this off like a casual friends thing, right?”
“Yeah . . .”
“So what if you ask Nicole as a group thing?” I say. “Then it’ll be even more legit.”
“I feel you. But then who else is in the group?”
“Okay well, me. And . . . it can’t be that girl you want to set me up with.”
“Why not?”
“Because then it will look like a double date. You setting me up? The four of us going together?”
Danny nods. “Okay. So who else?”