“No, the orderly recommended that she go alone, and that’s what she wanted, too,” Mrs. Turner said. “It’s been hard for her, I think, adjusting to these new circumstances.”
“More than you know,” I muttered.
“What?”
“Nothing,” I said. So, either Mina and John were going to attempt to hijack her somewhere between her room and physical therapy…or the orderly was in on it. I remembered suddenly Lucy saying the hospital chaplain was involved. He, of all people, would probably know the hospital personnel well enough to find a true believer or someone willing to look the other way for a little extra green.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” she asked again. “You just seem…out of sorts.” She offered me a kind smile, so similar to Lily’s, and patted the bed. “You want to sit down and tell me about it?”
I swallowed a hysterical laugh I could feel bubbling in the back of my throat. Well, you see Mrs. Turner, your daughter is not actually your daughter, at least not right now.
I shook my head. “Thanks, but I’m okay.”
“You’re welcome to wait here for her, if you want. But I don’t know what kind of shape she’ll be in when she gets back.”
You could say that again.
“I know things have been tough,” she continued, “but your friendship means the world to her. You should have seen the way she lit up earlier when you walked in.” Mrs. Turner gave me a significant look.
Alona. My chest ached with the need to find her. If I didn’t find and stop them in time, and she was…boxed, then our last conversation would be the one we had this morning. No, I couldn’t let that happen.
“I know things have been tough between the two of you, but I hope you can figure it out.”
Me, too. “Mrs. Turner, do you remember anything about the orderly that picked up…Lily?”
She frowned at me. “Why?”
Oh, good question, one for which I didn’t have an answer. I thought quickly, trying to come up with something that would seem legit without causing a panic. The last thing I wanted was the entire hospital in an uproar. That might cause Mina to try to hurry, or worse yet, take Alona and Lily out of here, assuming they were here to begin with. “I was just wondering if it was the same guy I saw on the elevator this morning with a patient,” I lied. “He’s a diner regular, I think.”
“Oh.” She looked faintly confused. “I don’t know. He was tall with dreadlocks. But I didn’t catch his name.”
Crap.
She brightened. “His scrubs were adorable. They were dark blue with balloons and teddy bears in party hats on them.”
Yeah. That was helpful. Then I realized she was waiting for a response. “Oh, yeah, that sounds like him,” I said quickly. “Nice guy.”
She nodded again, still seeming baffled by the turn of our conversation.
“I’m just going to go walk around a little, stretch my legs, check things out, while I’m waiting for Lily.” Like I hadn’t already spent way too much time in this hospital. But right now, the only solid lead I had was the priest. I could probably track down his office easily enough, assuming he was there and not with Mina and John. He’d been the one to call them in, so I had a hard time imagining him sitting idly by, doing paperwork or something, while they worked to remove this—what had Lucy called it?—manifestation.
“Okay,” Mrs. Turner said, “but don’t get in the way or bother people while they’re supposed to be working.” She pointed a finger at me.
“Got it.” I spun on my heel and started back the way I’d come. I didn’t know the priest’s name, but I bet someone at the nurses’ station could direct me to the chaplain’s office. If I had to, I’d page him and make him come to me. From there, I’d have to figure out what to say, another lie, but at least I’d be headed in the right direction.
At the nurses’ station, a mother with three children clinging to her legs had the attention of both nurses as she expressed displeasure about something to do with a fourth kid and a lack of Jell-O on his lunch tray yesterday.
Come on, come on.
“Can I help you?” One of the nurses finally turned her attention to me. It was the same one who’d looked at me disapprovingly when I’d burst in from the stairs, and she didn’t seem any happier with me now.
“I’m looking for the—” A flash of color, red on a dark blue background, passed by at the edge of my vision.
I turned quickly to see a tall man with short dreadlocks moving down the opposite branch of the hall, pushing agurney ahead of him. His scrub shirt was dark blue withteddy bears in party hats and red balloons printed all overthem.
Yes! My heart picked up an extra beat in the rush of adrenaline. This had to be him, right? The orderly who’d taken Alona to wherever she was.
“Young man?” the nurse asked, her mouth pursed tightly.
“Never mind,” I said quickly, and chased after the orderly. “Hey, wait, stop.”
He froze and then turned to give me a wary look over his shoulder.
Yeah, this was the guy.
“Listen.” I moved a little closer. “I got separated from the others, but I’m supposed to be helping.”
He shook his head, his eyes still watchful. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I got to get back to work, though, so—”
“The situation with room 512 and the Order,” I said in a voice just above a whisper. If I was wrong, and he had no idea what I was talking about, I was going to resemble a serious brand of crazy.
But recognition flashed over his expression. “Yeah. Yeah, okay.” He leaned toward me. “They’re downstairs.”
I felt a huge rush of relief. They were still in the hospital. “Where?” I asked, trying not to sound desperate and like I was ready to shake him for the information.
I must have only partially succeeded, though, because he pulled back slightly to frown at me.
“I’m going to be in so much trouble for being late. I’m supposed to be training, but I screwed up the time, and then I couldn’t find my notes on where we were supposed to meet, and you know how the Order is about punctuality.” I could hear myself rambling, saying too much, anything I thought might open the door to the information he held that I needed.
“It’s all right,” he said, his hands out as if to calm me. “We’ll get you there. Just take the elevator to the basement. Turn right into the hall, and then left down the first hall. First door with no windows.”
Yeah, that didn’t sound ominous at all. “Thanks, man, I really appreciate it.” The relief in my voice, at least, was genuine.
“You better hurry, though,” he said. “Father Hayes said it wouldn’t take very long. And I gotta be down there in a little while to pick her up and bring her back.”
I couldn’t help but wonder how much he knew, what he would think when he went to pick up Lily from that windowless space and found her an empty shell once more. Was he expecting it? Or would it give him second thoughts about his involvement in something he probably didn’t completely understand?
Either way, I didn’t want to wait around to find out.
I nodded my thanks at him and took off for the elevator.
Father Hayes looked alarmed. “Someone will hear her screaming, even down here.”
Good. I took another deep breath and continued at the top of my lungs, even though my voice had already faded into something less of a scream and more of an annoying screech.
Mina seemed flustered, caught between keeping the disruptor aimed at me and moving faster to get the boxes laid out. “Just help me,” she ordered the priest. “Put the boxes on the floor and—”
Behind me, I heard the door open abruptly. Both Mina and the priest jumped. “What the hell are you doing?” a man’s voice demanded.
Yes! I was saved. I tried to crane around to see him but could only catch a glimpse of jeans and the cuff of a faded flannel shirt. “They kidnapped me,” I said, my voice croaking. “Call the police.”
“You’re g
oing to have half the hospital down here, Mina,” he said, clearly irritated.
My heart fell. The man, my potential rescuer, was evidently part of Mina’s crew.
A second later, hands shoved rough fabric smelling heavily of bleach and laundry detergent into my mouth, pulling it tight and tying it off at the back of my head, catching some of my hair painfully in the process. Thematerial sucked all the moisture out of my mouth, and it tasted horrible.
“If you’re going to survive as a full member, your planning skills need improvement,” he said, sounding reproving.
I was only half-listening, focused more on trying to get the gag to loosen. He’d pulled it so tight I couldn’t even bite down on it. Not that I even had a chance in hell of chewing through it in hours, which was way more time than it would take for them to do what they were going to do.
“I would have had it,” she said plaintively. “I just needed a few more seconds.”
He made a sound of disgust, and she flinched a little. That caught my attention. Whoever this guy was, Mina was afraid of him.
“Get on with it,” he said. “Or do you need me to do that, too?”
She shook her head rapidly, her hair flying around her pinched white face.
With Mina’s guidance, the priest finished laying out the boxes and connecting the individual cords to one larger one that lay on the floor near an available wall outlet, and then Mina moved to stand at my side. She brought the disruptor closer, pressing it hard against my shoulder. The wires on the open end dug into my skin through the hospital gown.
I squirmed in my chair, but my lower half was still astonishingly uncooperative. There was no way I would be getting out of here under my own power, even if I could somehow get past the three of them. I screamed against the gag, but the muffled sound that emerged would never travel past the closed door. So…this was it.
My heart was beating a thousand times a minute, shaking me with it. I wondered if it hurt to be boxed, or if I just wouldn’t feel anything more. Tears trickled down my face to be absorbed by the fabric around my mouth.
Will. I wanted him here so badly. I mean, if this was it, then at least I wouldn’t be alone.
“Ready?” Mina asked.
The priest nodded anxiously, his face covered in a light sheen of sweat.
“It’s your show,” the man behind me said, sounding impatient.
She took a deep breath and pressed buttons on her device.
A faint blue glow emerged, and electricity ran through me, clamping my jaws shut and arching my back. The pain felt like fire over my whole body. Agonized whimpers escaped my mouth despite my best efforts.
Then the strangest sensation suffused me, a separating, one becoming two, like peeling the backing from a sticker or removing that layer of dead sunburned skin. I could feel myself, distinct once more, within Lily.
Mina skimmed her free hand over the surface of my arm. My actual arm, not Lily’s. Staring down at myself, I could see the ghostly—no pun intended—outline of my own body overlaid on Lily’s. I might have cried with relief except I knew this meant I was likely one step closer to those damn boxes on the floor.
I struggled to pull myself free of Lily’s body, but it heldme as securely as a mouse on one of those nasty glue traps my step-Mothra had insisted on using in the garage at their house.
“Get ready, or you’re going to lose it,” the man behind me said, but he made no move to help her. “It’s going to fight you.”
It? Oh, hell no. And you bet your life I was going to fight.
Mina nodded, but didn’t look up. Her hand hovered above my wrist, just barely making contact, and the next time I lurched upward in an attempt to free myself, her fingers closed around my arm.
I watched in astonishment as she set her feet on the floor, bracing herself, and began to tug at me with one hand—none too gently, I might add—while using the other to keep the end of the disruptor pressed against the shoulder where Lily and I were still joined.
In a few seconds, she’d pulled me out from the waist up. I could see my white shirt with the treadmark again, and my long blond hair brushed against my cheek. I was almost free! It felt strange after so many hours as Lily.
“Look, it was an accident,” I said quickly, twisting my wrist in Mina’s grasp, trying to break free. “I’m out now. I promise I’m not going back in. Trust me.” I was sweaty with panic. I couldn’t run. I was still merged with Lily’s body from the waist down,
“Transition, Mina. Switch over, or you’re going to lose it,” the man ordered.
Behind me, I sensed movement and looked to see Lily slumping against the side of her chair. Oh, God. I flashed back to the memory of Mrs. Turner holding me/Lily against her shoulder. She would be destroyed to see her daughter like this. My heart ached for the girl who would never wake up to see the flowers her father had brought her, the way her mother took care of her, and even her brother returning something to her that he knew she would want.
The priest was staring at Lily and looked sickened. “Is this normal?” he asked. The priest had a point. Lily didn’t look good, and I didn’t think it wasn’t just the absence of vitality and movement. Actually, she seemed worse than before. She was paler, her skin grayer.
The man in the flannel shirt shook his head grimly. I could see more of him now. He had wiry dark hair that looked like it would be curly if he let it grow. His face was hard with deep lines carved in his forehead and on either side of his mouth, like he worked outside or had lots of stress. “They must have bonded. If the entity is embedded long enough, the host becomes dependent on the entity’s energy. And the entity—”
Everyone shifted their gazes to me.
“—becomes dependent on the host, feeding on the electrical energy provided by the body. It’s a cycle.”
I looked down at myself and saw that my arms were disappearing. I gasped. They weren’t flickering, not like all the times before, just slowly vanishing like they’d never been there. And I didn’t feel a thing.
Behind me, Lily began gasping for air, a horrible thick sound. She was dying, I was disappearing, and it was all my fault.
“Hurry up,” he snapped at Mina. “The possession drained it. If it disappears now, it’ll be gone for good. The Order wants a chance to study it first,” the flannel-shirt guy said.
Study me? Why? For how long? Would I be caged up or in pieces? My throat closed with fear. I wanted to struggle, but I had no means for it. I couldn’t even push myself away.
Mina fumbled with the disruptor, moving it up to my neck. “I’m working on it,” she snapped to the guy behind me, who seemed to be a boss of some kind. “Can you just let me do this?”
She bent down and plugged the giant cord into the wall. Instantly, the boxes on the floor began to glow with a sickly yellow light that spilled out of a thin crack along the tops. Then the tops began to retract, and that awful parody of the white light began to seep out toward me, like long creepy fingers reaching.
I screamed, but no one even flinched.
In the midst of this chaos, the door burst open once more. As one, everyone, except Lily, turned to look.
As if my desperation had summoned him like a homing beacon, Will Killian stood in the doorway, out of breath, normally pale cheeks flushed with color.
The guy in flannel smiled. “Will,” he said, sounding pleased. “What are you doing—”
Will ignored him. “Stop,” he shouted at Mina. “Turn it off.” He rushed forward and shoved at her, knocking her hand away from me, sending the disruptor flying across the room toward the priest.
But it was too late. I could feel the light from those boxes pulling me in, each one a slightly different sensation. Some prickly like pins, some hot like the blistering heat rising from fresh asphalt, all painful. It was sectioning me into pieces.
In that second, everything slowed down, becoming very quiet and clear.
I could let the boxes take me in and pull me apart, and the Order would study
me, whatever hellish ordeal that might involve.
I could just let myself go. Just be gone. It wouldn’t be so bad, would it? Being nothing would be nothing…right?
Or, I could try. Lily’s body would protect me from the boxes. That’s why they’d had to use the disruptor in the first place. But to voluntarily return to her dying body, knowing I’d be stuck? I felt sick at just the idea. That would make me what Will had accused me of being, a body snatcher, and not even of a body I wanted. I couldn’t be Lily Turner.
But if flannel guy was right about Lily and me being dependent on each other, she might survive with my help. She might live because of me. There had to be a reason I’d been sent back from the light, right? Maybe this was it. Maybe we could save each other. And if we lived through this, there might be another chance for us. An opportunity for Lily to keep living and me to be me again, right? But if I didn’t take this chance now, we were both done for. And I couldn’t just let her die, not when I’d caused this to happen and might be able to stop it.…
In my mind, I saw Mrs. Turner’s tear-stained face before me again, the moment she realized her daughter was awake.I knew you would come back. I knew there was a reason to keep hoping.
I turned my head and met Will’s gaze. Eyes wide, he shook his head at me as though he could hear what I was thinking.
I’m sorry. Then I wrenched myself backward toward Lily, praying Mrs. Turner had been right.
“No!” I shouted. But Alona was gone.
The boxes remained open and glowing, though, and none of the others in the closet seemed sure where to look. But I knew. I knew Alona. Self-preservation was never very far down on that girl’s list.
I stared down at Lily. She appeared no different, still struggling to breathe and so pale she might as well have been translucent. But I was almost positive that’s where Alona had gone. She’d taken Lily to use for her own purposes again, and this time, it might kill Lily.
Damn it.
But oddly enough, that last look she’d given me had not been one of triumph. Not at all. She’d seemed sad, desperate maybe, and…resigned, if I had to describe it.