“Au pair,” she corrected.
“Right. Right.” He smiled, revealing a row of yellowish teeth. “Who’s the lucky family?”
She told him about the Perrys and gave him their address on Lily Pond Lane. He looked impressed.
“Perry? Not Kevin Perry?”
She nodded.
“The lucky bastard,” Rupert said, now grinning broadly. “Maxine and I know them,” he said as he put a hand on her knee. “My wife, you know. We just got married last year. It wasn’t my idea,” he added as he ran a hand up her toned thigh, stopping just short of her denim miniskirt. He let his hand rest there—just below—to see what she would do.
It must have been the alcohol because even if she had expected this, Jacqui wasn’t as repulsed as she normally would be.
“We won’t get into East Hampton for another hour with this traffic,” he murmured, leaning in to smell her hair. “What do you say?”
Jacqui giggled into her glass. Really, men were way too predictable. “I don’t know, what do you say?” she asked, finally pushing his hand away.
“Well, I think we should get to know each other a little . . . “he began to suggest when they were both jostled by the limo swerving to miss a red convertible.
Jacqui looked out the window and saw a cute guy giving the limo the finger while a blond girl laughed beside him.
“Luca?” she called. It looked like him—from the back—was it? She couldn’t be sure. Thinking of Luca sobered her up. What the hell was she doing in the back of a limo with a guy twice her age?
It was time to take control of the situation.
“Rupert,” she said, turning around to let him know she needed to be dropped off in East Hampton pronto and she wasn’t about to play any more games. But Rupert was already on the other side of the car, answering his cell phone.
Thank God for Hollywood diva crises.
east hampton, new york: god, eliza missed this
THREE HOURS AFTER THEY SET OFF FROM PARK AVENUE, Kit and Eliza arrived on East Hampton’s main drag. Eliza felt a wave of nostalgia and affection at the sight of the familiar tree-lined shopping street with the shiny new Citarella anchored at the end of the block. The store stocked even better salmon pâté and stuffed grape leaves than the one on the Upper West Side. A few blocks away stood the Creed outpost, a pink jewel box of a store, where she had spent hours trying on perfumes last summer, finally selecting one especially made for the duchess of Windsor.
That’s what Eliza loved about the Hamptons—Manhattan’s most elegant boutiques and gourmet food stores supplanted to a gentler setting. The Hamptons were just like the city, except with only one-tenth of its inhabitants—the top one-tenth. It was like the social equivalent of Harvard, Eliza decided. Of course, there were too many of the hoi polloi these days—wannabes who piled into illegal fifty-person “share houses,” where the beds were stacked up right next to each other like the gyms that doubled as disaster-recovery zones whenever there was a flood or a fire or a tornado or one of those other terrible things that happened far, far from here.
Regrettably, the Hamptons were getting more media attention every year. There had been a number of cable specials, documentaries, and “exposés” on everything from the singles dating scene to the environmental problems. It was a favorite target of lazy lifestyle reporters who were forever sounding the death knell and declaring the scene “over” and the beach “spoiled by civilization.” Still, it didn’t keep the hordes of up-and-coming Hollywood stars, Grammy Award winners, sitcom royalty, rap impresarios, and literary lions as well as assorted social-climbing aspirants from calling the place home-away-from-home three months out of the year. After all, a forty-mile stretch of beach only four hours’ drive from Manhattan (make that two if you speed on Route 27 after dinner and The Sopranos on Sundays) was a total godsend.
“You can drop me off right here,” she told Kit. “I’m meeting my uncle by the windmill.”
“Okay.” Kit nodded, finding a spot by the curb. He popped the trunk and helped her with her bags. “So we’ll see you tonight?” he asked.
“Duh. Of course.”
“Rockin’. Don’t forget—if they ask, you’re on my list. Any problem at the door, buzz me,” he said, miming a phone call. He kissed her on the cheek. “Later.”
“Later.” She waved. She walked over to the bench where a Jitney was disembarking its passengers. A disgruntled girl wiping away a stain on the bottom of her shirt walked off the bus and sat down next to her.
Eliza barely noticed. She was oblivious to the outside world and already plotting how she would ditch work to go to the party. She wasn’t totally clear on the rules per se, but if the party started at midnight, there was no reason she wouldn’t be able to go, right? Kevin was just doing this as a favor to her dad. It wasn’t as if the Perrys actually expected her to watch their children.
ryan perry is adonis in board shorts
“YECCH. IT’S NO USE!” MARA COMPLAINED, MAKING one last effort to clean up the mess. She threw the tissue away in disgust, making a perfect arc into the trash can. It was her best going-out shirt, too. A nice rayon-poly blend she’d gotten at the Sturbridge Mall for, like, thirty bucks! It wasn’t so pretty now that the little beast Muffy had peed all over it.
Mara looked around, blinking at the quaint small-town storefronts that announced exclusive brand names. A white summer cottage read Tiffany & Co. in the window; another rustic shack read Cashmere Hampton. A glittering assortment of Mercedes-Benzes, Jaguars, BMWs, and Porsches made a slow, rumbling parade down the center of town, where a giant windmill towered at the intersection. Mara had never seen a Bentley in her life—and in two minutes in East Hampton, she had already counted two.
Everyone moved at a leisurely, languid pace. Elegant women with psychedelic silk scarves wrapped around their heads carried fluffy white dogs in their Hermés pocketbooks. Balding men with women less than half their age walked arm in arm down to the nearby park. Giggling teenagers wearing nothing but the tightest tube tops and the highest platform wedges darted in and out of traffic.
“Do you have the time?” asked the girl beside her. Mara did a quick double take. The long blond hair, the annoyed expression, the tennis racket . . . She’d seen this girl before, but where?
“It’s ten after five,” Mara replied, discreetly checking out the girl’s outfit. Mara wished she had thought to wear a little skirt and flip-flops. She was wearing her leather cowboy boots in a misguided attempt to impress. It was ninety degrees and she was boiling.
The girl nodded and started paging through her PalmPilot.
“Excuse me,” Mara said.
Blondie raised an eyebrow without looking up from her task.
“Weren’t you in Port Authority this morning?”
“No.”
“Oh. Sorry. I thought I might have bumped into you this morning. . . .”
“No. Wrong person,” she said curtly, sliding down to the opposite end of the bench to make her point.
“Oh, okay. Sorry,” Mara said. They lapsed into an awkward silence.
The two of them sat on the bench and studiously ignored each other.
A silver Aston Martin Vanquish convertible pulled up in front of the bench, and the two girls immediately sat up a little straighter. A tall, tanned guy wearing a holey Martha’s Vineyard T-shirt and cutoff board shorts eased out and walked barefoot on the sidewalk. Cue: dreamboat music.
Guys that like that are so out of my league, Mara thought. Not that she was in the market for one—she did have a guy at home. What was his name again? Jim. Right.
Of course, the hottie went straight up to that prissy blonde who’d been so rude to her earlier. It just made sense.
“Ryan Perry! It’s been too long,” she cooed.
“Hey!” Ryan said, bending over for a quick hug. “How was the Jitney?”
“What Jitney? I rode in with Kit.”
“Very cool. How’s he doing?”
“Not bad. There’s a party ton
ight. At Resort,” she said, self-importantly flipping her hair.
“Yeah, yeah. I heard.” He grinned. “I got the e-vite.”
“Maybe I’ll let you be my date,” she teased, basking in the glow of his attention.
Ryan Perry was the type of guy girls swooned over and guys considered their best buds. That he was superlatively good-looking was intrinsic yet somehow irrelevant to the totality of his charm. He had that sunny, good-natured disposition that came from being incredibly lucky both in looks and in life. He wore the mantle of privilege carelessly and would have been just as appealing driving a Pinto as a Porsche. He was the kind of guy who was loyal to his girlfriends and could always be counted on to provide the biggest liter of tequila to any party. Of course, he could also be counted on to empty it.
Mara watched them flirt without the slightest bit of envy. They might as well have been from another planet as far as she was concerned. Mara was always afraid she was just a “sorta.” You know, “sorta cute,” “sorta smart,” “sorta popular” but nothing special. So when Ryan suddenly called her name, he had to repeat it three times since she was so shocked to have even been noticed, let alone recognized. She wasn’t the only one. The other girl was now looking at her with renewed, if slightly hostile interest.
“Mara? Mara Waters?” Ryan asked, giving her the full benefit of his dazzling dimples. One on each cheek. Mara could hardly bear it.
“Uh. Me?” Mara squeaked.
“I’m Ryan Perry,” Ryan said, offering his hand. “My dad was supposed to come get you guys, but he had to do something for Anna. This your suitcase?” he asked, picking up her oversized roller bag.
“Uh-huh.” Mara nodded, dying as her bag went clackety-clackety-clack all over the cobblestone tiles. She almost wanted to disappear when the bag careened wildly and the magazines she’d stuffed in the back pocket went flying. She swore the first thing she would do when she got paid was find out where to get her hands on one of those cute canvas monogrammed tote bags everyone seemed to carry around here.
Ryan held his door open so Mara could climb inside.
“So . . . have you guys met?” Ryan asked.
“Yes,” Mara replied.
“No,” the other girl said.
“Oh-kay.” Ryan laughed. “Eliza, Mara, Mara, Eliza. We’re all really glad you’re both working here this summer. God knows Anna has been totally freaked out the past couple of days.” He drove off the highway into a road with a Private Property: No Trespassing sign. Seeing the concerned look on Mara’s face from the rearview mirror, he said, “Oh, don’t worry. The Mortons let us use it all the time. The traffic’s so bad here, everyone has to use the back roads to get anywhere.”
“Don’t I know it,” Eliza agreed.
Mara nodded. But her mind was still on what Ryan had said earlier. We’re so happy you’re both working here? Huh. Looked like there was more (or a lot less) to this Eliza girl than she had first thought.
mara is the odd girl out on lily pond lane
THEY DROVE PAST A PRACTICALLY UNENDING LINE OF ten-foot-tall hedges—Mara could barely see the roofs of the houses. Ryan steered the car steadily down the one-lane back road, occasionally calling out hellos and waving. Several groups walked on the side of the road, carrying surfing or water sport gear. Others pedaled on English Raleigh bicycles, shopping bags from Dreesen’s tucked in their baskets. Practically every other car was a convertible. Eliza spent the entire time glued to her cell phone, making calls to various friends and updating them on her plans for the evening.
“Hey, was that . . .?” Mara asked, turning around so quickly she almost gave herself whiplash.
“Yeah, that’s Steven Spielberg. They have a house near us on the pond. We always see him at Nick and Toni’s,” Ryan mentioned offhandedly. His dad had a standing table at the restaurant, one of the most popular gathering spots for bold-faced names.
“Oh.” Wow. Mara tried not to look too impressed. “I saw Tom Hanks once,” she offered.
“Really? Where?” Ryan asked, sounding genuinely intrigued.
“The airport,” she said sheepishly. “He gave my sister an autograph. She chased him all the way to the men’s room.”
Ryan laughed.
“Tom and Rita used to come to your mom’s fund-raisers all the time, didn’t they, Ryan?” Eliza lifted her chin from her phone and asked in an extremely bored voice.
Mara felt slapped in the face.
They drove up to another row of hedges into a private driveway that snaked up to a white mansion with huge Grecian columns. In the driveway were a Mercedes SUV, a Range Rover, a vintage Corvette convertible, a Porsche Cayenne SUV, and two motor scooters. Talk about an auto show.
“Here we are,” said Ryan, bringing the car to a stop on the gravel drive.
A stretch Hummer limousine with rims that spun in reverse even when the car was stopped was parked out front.
“Oh my God! Look at that!” Mara hooted. “What a dumb car.”
“It’s an H2 stretch. Top of the line,” Eliza said in an irritated tone.
A chauffeur emerged from the front seat and walked the four car lengths to the back to hold the door open. A pair of mile-long tanned legs that ended in white furry sheepskin boots swung out. Jacqui Velasco certainly knew how to make an exit, or an entrance, if you will. She let the newcomers take in her presence, then turned around and hitched her hip to the side, kneeling on the car door to say good-bye to her patron.
“Obrigado,” she said, a little unsteadily from the numerous cocktails on the ride.
“No, thank you, bellisima.” Rupert Thorne winked, pulling her in for a kiss.
“Naughty boy,” Jacqui said, wagging her finger when Rupert licked rather than pecked her cheek.
“I’ll see you around,” he promised.
Not if I can help it, Jacqui thought grimly. She straightened up, slammed the door, and found Ryan, Eliza, and Mara watching her, all with different expressions on their faces. Ryan looked amused, Mara intimidated, and Eliza impressed.
“Kick-ass boots!” Eliza said to Jacqui.
Apparently boots in summer were okay after all, thought Mara.
“Thank you,” Jacqui said with a slight accent. “We just got them in from Australia the other day.” She smiled at Eliza. “Jacqui Velasco.”
“Eliza Thompson. That’s Ryan Perry, our boss.” She snickered. “And, uh . . . I forgot your name. Mary, right?”
“Mara,” Mara said with steel in her voice. She wasn’t going to Blondie here push her around. “Mara Waters, nice to meet you.”
“So did you have to go on a wait list or something to get those? I’ve been dying for them!” Eliza said, falling in step with Jacqui.
The two headed inside the house, chatting about footwear, their nearly identical wraparound sunglasses pulled up on their heads. Mara stood somewhat at a loss, wondering if she should follow them, already feeling completely out of place.
Ryan pulled her battered nylon suitcase from the trunk and handed it to a white-jacketed butler. “Don’t let Eliza bother you too much,” he said. “She can be a pain, but she’s actually really nice. She’s just going through a lot right now.”
Mara couldn’t fathom how “really nice” could ever apply to the Attitude Queen, but she wanted to be agreeable. If only she wouldn’t blush every time he looked at her.
A chubby ten-year-old girl with unruly curls ran out of the side door, wearing a bright pink bathing suit, goggles, and flippers. “You’re IT!” she said, barreling into Ryan.
“Madison Avenue!” he said, lifting her up and spinning her around.
“Stop! Stop!” She giggled. “Put me down!!”
Ryan let her go and said, “Hey, say hi to Mara. Mara, my little sister Madison.”
Madison scooted inside the front door, Ryan and Mara following.
“By the way,” Ryan said, holding the door open. “I thought that limo was a dumb car, too.”
Mara couldn’t stop smiling even after
he had left.
This is what “Let’s burn the money to keep warm” looks like
“HI! WELCOME TO CREEK HEAD MANOR!” A FROWSY, overweight woman in a pink sweatshirt with a Nokia hanging on a chain around her neck beamed at them as they entered the house. “I’m Laurie, Anna’s personal assistant. Anna’s not back from her Reiki session yet, so she asked me to welcome you and give you a tour of the house.” She clucked at the sight of their footwear. “Sorry, but I’m going to have to ask everyone to take off their shoes before entering. The zebrawood hasn’t been oiled yet.” Laurie proudly explained that Anna had flown in an artisan from South America to work with I. J. Peiser and Sons on the floor design. According to Laurie, they did everyone’s floors, though it occurred to Mara that “everyone” must not be anything like anyone Mara knew.
Eliza grumbled at the inconvenience, Jacqui laughed, and Mara felt embarrassed to take off her cowboy boots—one of her gray socks had a huge hole in the toe. Laurie kept up the chatter as they tiptoed around the edges of the vast living room, which was dominated by an enormous floor-to-ceiling picture window that stretched from one end of the house to the other. “I love this feature!” she gushed as she pressed a button on the wall and automated curtains revealed an uninterrupted view of the Atlantic coast. The waves lapped gracefully by the shore, and seagulls waddled across the sand.
“We’ve been putting out poisoned bread to keep them off, but it’s not working.” Laurie sighed. “Shoo! Shoo!”
Mara’s eyes widened at the view—it was amazing. Eliza picked at her cuticles—
she’d been a guest at the house before, and besides, the Thompsons’ old place had almost the same view (maybe even better since their next-door neighbors, a prominent Hollywood actor and his starlet wife, had liked to sunbathe nude on their terrace). Jacqui yawned—the sight didn’t hold a candle to the golden beaches of Angra dos Reis in Costa Verde. No one braved a comment on the seagullicide program.
The house smelled sweet but slightly suffocating. Immense bouquets of freshly cut flowers were placed everywhere in carefully considered arrangements. The sculpted glass coffee table was decorated by a spray of fat, blooming, Georgia-peach-colored roses in a crystal decanter, matching sideboards spilled over with hollyhocks, irises, and calla lilies, and an enormous Ming vase in the foyer held a magnificent cluster of six-foot-tall acid yellow sunflowers.