He was the only one who knew where she was.
***
“Chris!” May called.
Aiming her Maglite into the night, it did little to penetrate the thick darkness and whirling snow. If only they’d found her before nightfall. The blizzard was in full force now. Would it ever let up?
The first thing May did when the riderless Spirit returned was call Beth’s cell phone. Since the stirrups on Spirit’s saddle were way too short for a man, they knew for sure Chris had been the one riding him. And if a search was to be conducted, she couldn’t count on anyone more than Beth and her parents, Sam and Peggy. They’d arrived in record time, followed by their neighbors Jan and Keith Mercer.
Now they had to search in the dark. Beth rode beside her, the beams from their flashlights intertwining over the hills. Following Spirit’s returning tracks had been easy enough at first, but the tracks had deteriorated until eventually the wind wiped them out entirely. Which meant all they had to go on was the general direction from which he’d come. They’d split into four teams of two with May and Beth on horseback and the others in their vehicles.
Everyone was keeping in touch by radio, and May reported into her handheld, “This is May. Nothing yet, guys.”
“Same here,” came Jim. “But we’ll keep going.”
A burst of static, then Peggy echoed the same.
“We’ll keep looking,” Keith replied.
May clipped the radio back onto her jacket. “Let’s head up there,” she said, pointing in the direction of Squatter’s Mountain, trying to keep her worries under control.
This land wasn’t too kind to folks who didn’t know it, and she kept thinking of the horrific accidents many of her neighbors had endured. There was that experienced foreman whose horse spooked at a jackrabbit and dragged him to his death. The cowboy who barely made it back alive after being jumped by a starving cougar. The rancher whose horse threw him and left him paralyzed from the waist down. And then there was Ruth’s husband. All of them were men who knew the ways of horses and knew their ranches even better than they knew their wives.
May desperately wanted to believe and trust the Lord that her sister was all right and that this nightmare would end better than those other disasters. At first she’d been okay, managing to convince herself that at any moment Chris would appear, maybe a little bruised, but none the worse for wear. But Chris hadn’t shown up, and fear now seized her. Not only were the elements against her sister, but none of them knew where Vince was, either.
Was he hurting Chris right now?
***
Christy had to get warm. Her teeth chattered as she dragged her body inch by inch toward the trunk of the nearest tree. It was excruciating, but she had to have the little shelter it would provide. So this is what it feels like to freeze to death.
Another blast of wind. She willed her body toward the tree, only aware of its vague outline. Two last drags and she was underneath it. Clenching her jaw, she swore at the pain.
A series of eerie howls that sounded like a bunch of teenage boys pretending to be wolves set her nerves on edge. Coyotes. A whole pack of them it sounded like, way too close. May’s voice echoed in her mind: “Coyotes . . . they do brutal things to calves.”
Could they smell blood? Did they attack people?
And what if Vince was stalking her right now? If he found her like this, she would be completely at his mercy, and she didn’t doubt what he’d do.
Christy had to get up. She couldn’t just lie here like a sitting duck.
But she didn’t risk calling out again like she so foolishly did earlier. If Vince was near, that would only alert him of her location. Desperately, she listened for sounds of help. There were the coyotes again, then nothing. Nothing but the rustling of falling snow, like dry grass blowing on a windy day. Sounds of nature. No human voices. No sound of Spirit nearby. No one calling her name. How would May know where to look?
Christy took off her glove again and felt the wound on her forehead. It stung when she touched it. A drop of blood trickled down her face, and she wiped it, closing her eyes. She didn’t know how long she could last out here.
***
Vince stopped the horse to light a cigar, glad he’d had the presence of mind to bring one along. He had planned to smoke it in victory, but enjoying it in anticipation was satisfying enough.
He touched his fingers to his throbbing temple where Christy dared to strike him. Instead of defeating him, the pain drove him on. And confidence pulsed through him like the nicotine pulsing through his cells.
The scream had been faint, but he was sure he’d heard it. If it weren’t for the time he’d lost saddling this beast and the blasted weather, he would’ve caught her by now. Coyotes howled in the distance, and somehow he felt akin to them.
They were all hunting tonight.
***
“Could she have made it this far?” Beth asked
May turned up the collar of her coat. “How should I know?”
Beth quieted at her sharp answer.
“I’m sorry,” May said. The cold and frantic searching was starting to wear on her, but that gave her no right to take it out on Beth. She handed her friend the radio. “Could you take this for a while?”
Beth did and reported, “No signs of her yet. Over.”
May whispered, “Hang on, Chris. Wherever you are. Hang on.”
***
Christy clawed at the snow around the tree, hoping to find dead branches she could use for protection. All she found were frozen pine needles, and she had no idea what to do with those. She craved warmth, but she could only lie on her back shivering, fearing each breath would be her last.
How much time had passed?
There was no way to know. She had to be missed by now. But how would they know where to look? Were her tracks still visible in this weather? Had Spirit made it back, or was he lying dead nearby? If her tracks were visible, May wasn’t the only one who’d be able to follow her. Or maybe no one even knew to look for her this far out.
Was she going to die out here? If Vince found her she’d be dead eventually. But even if he didn’t, she knew she was losing blood, and a night in this frigid air alone would be enough to kill even a healthy person.
Christy held her hands over her face and whispered into them, “I don’t know if May’s right about You or not. I want her to be. But she’s so much better than me. She’s a good kid. I never have been.”
She took away her hands, and lying still in the snow, scenes of her past replayed. She saw herself leaving May. She was eighteen again, driving away knowing, but not admitting she knew, how it would hurt her sister.
Jump ahead a year. Christy was inside that abortion clinic allowing them to cut up her tiny baby like a hunk of meat. She’d known deep at her core what she was doing, but she hadn’t allowed herself to think about it. She couldn’t be a mother yet. Her whole life was in front of her waiting to be lived.
Yeah, a life of nights in bars just to forget that one day. She thought of her affair with Vince and the other men she’d slept with in an attempt to feel loved and fulfilled. But instead, she’d always wake up in the morning with an even deeper emptiness inside. It wasn’t love. She’d used the men; they’d used her.
“I’m ashamed of my life,” Christy said under her breath. “All I’ve ever wanted was for someone to love me. I’ve never felt it. That’s why it’s hard for me to imagine You could love me. I don’t understand why you would. I don’t have anything to offer You.”
She looked up through the pines. Her eyes were getting better at seeing through the darkness. The tall silhouettes surrounded her like a massive army of giant soldiers ready to gun her down.
Please be listening, God.
***
The urge was strong, and May couldn’t ignore it. Pray. Now. For Chris.
She did. “Lord, I ask you in the name of Jesus to protect Chris right now. Satan, you are not getting her. I cla
im her for God. She will be all right. And we will find her.”
Beth chimed in, “Amen.”
They kept riding, but May felt no release. Something was very wrong.
***
Vince dismounted and flipped on his flashlight, shining it through the trees. Once he got his bearings, he snuffed the light. No need to announce his presence.
The faint tracks he’d seen led him in this direction, but the snow had quickly erased them. The call had come from this way too, and here was a meager trail winding up the side of the mountain. It looked way too dangerous to ride any farther. He’d have to continue on foot. He secured his horse to a tree near the trailhead, as much out of sight as possible, and started climbing.
***
Christy squeezed her arms tightly around her body and tried to ignore the excruciating pain. She was still shuddering uncontrollably.
Why would God even listen to her? She was guilty.
But what about that pastor’s message? He’d said God wasn’t looking for him to clean himself up before He accepted him. God just wanted his heart.
He couldn’t be talking about me. I’m worthless.
Tears welled up in Christy’s eyes. How many times had Vince told her that?
“I’m a sinner,” she whispered.
A picture flashed through her mind. It was May sitting beside her in the truck the other night. Christy saw again the earnestness in her sister’s eyes when she’d said, “I love you. And so does God.”
None of it made sense. God should’ve turned His back on her years ago. But if what May and that pastor said was true, He hadn’t. He was up there now looking down on her. Waiting.
She lifted her eyes to the treetops, her tears warm against her cheeks.
“I’ve been . . . running from You my . . . whole life,” she said, the words coming out in jerky sobs. Without thinking, she clasped her hands together. “I’m sorry.” She didn’t know what else to say. Just two words spoke her heart. “So sorry.”
***
“Which way now?” Beth asked.
May stopped her horse and panned her flashlight, trying to decide. Visibility was better now that the snow was easing up, but the wind was relentless. She wasn’t sure why she was feeling a draw toward Squatter’s Mountain. Chris would’ve been a fool to try and climb it in this weather, but Spirit could’ve taken her there. May had ridden him to the mountain so many times he knew it by rote. “Let’s at least go past Squatter’s.”
“May.”
She clicked her tongue to get her mare going again.
“Hold up a sec.”
“We’ve gotta keep moving.”
“I just want you to listen to me for one minute, okay?”
“While we’re riding.”
“No, please listen now.”
May lifted her light to Beth’s face. Her friend’s expression was grim.
“I’m gonna stay with you for as long as it takes,” Beth said. “And so are Mom and Dad. But I just want to prepare you. I mean—”
“I know.”
“It’s been a long time. It’s twenty degrees out here, and even if—”
Holding up her hand, she stopped her friend. She knew full well what Beth was going to say. Even if Christy was alive, she wouldn’t be for long in this weather. But she couldn’t stand to hear anyone say it, including herself. “I can’t think about that. I just can’t.”
Beth raised her own light to May’s face. “Okay.”
“She has to be all right. I don’t know what I’d do . . .”
Beth nodded. “Then let’s keep going.”
***
Christy wasn’t afraid anymore, even though her limbs were stiffening and she was still in the middle of nowhere. It was like something had filled her so completely there wasn’t room for fear.
Could that be peace?
Clouds were now visible moving across the sky. Then the huge smiling moon emerged and shone down on her. She closed her eyes. Nice touch.
What if Vince hadn’t followed her after all? For all she knew, he was sitting warm and cozy in front of his fire back home.
Christy felt her consciousness drift.
No, stay awake!
She tried to move her leg and a bolt of fire shot up to her waist. Staying quiet would kill her too. What if she called just once more? Once would be all she could muster anyway.
It would hurt. She struggled to form the words through her thick, numb lips. “Someone, help me!”
She listened, but there was nothing, and unconsciousness quickly blacked out her pain.
***
May abruptly turned in her saddle.
“What?” Beth said.
“You hear that?”
“No, what?”
“I thought . . .” Was her mind playing tricks on her?
Her mount let out a startled whinny, and she caught movement in the brush beside them. They both swung their flashlights around at the same time, only to catch a flash of gray fur.
“Coyote,” Beth said.
“Yeah.” But May thought for sure she’d heard something else.
Chapter 21
Christy opened her eyes, but it made no difference. The moon was gone.
What was that noise? Where was she?
Maybe this was just a dream. . . . Wake up. . . .
Her eyes sealed shut. She wasn’t shivering as much now. She would sleep for just a little while longer.
***
May’s heart battered her ribs as she kept her horse walking. Had she imagined Chris calling?
“It was a coyote,” Beth said.
“Didn’t sound like one.” She called her sister’s name again and listened for a response. The radio crackled. It was Jim reporting his and Ruth’s location.
“We’re nearing Squatter’s,” May said. “Guys, I’m sure I heard something.”
***
Vince chuckled. That was definitely a voice. He threw his cigar into a drift and trudged forward up the trail. Thrusting a hand inside his jacket, he felt for the pistol, his fingers tingling with anticipation. He could feel Christy’s presence. Just a little more moonlight was all he needed.
***
“Beth, let’s pray.”
They’d reached the trailhead and heard only an occasional wind gust, but the uneasiness wouldn’t leave May. Both of them stopped their horses.
Beth veered her flashlight up through the trees. “Wisdom, Lord. We need Your guidance.”
Call her again.
The thought was clear, and May wasn’t about to ignore it. “Chris! Are you up there?”
Silence.
***
“I know it’s dangerous,” May spoke into the radio. She was trying to convince Jim they had to start climbing Squatter’s Mountain immediately. “But we won’t take the horses.”
Jim said, “At least wait for us to meet you.”
“We can’t wait.”
Jim protested further, but May had already made up her mind. “I’ll keep in contact,” she said, and reclipped the radio to her coat, turning down the volume so she could barely hear his objections. Normally she wouldn’t rebel against Jim’s seasoned judgment, but this time she had to. She’d never been so sure of anything.
“Let’s go,” she said to Beth, dismounting.
Beth yanked the blanket roll from the back of her saddle as May aimed her light into the woods. The forest was in constant motion from the wind, and every shadow looked like a body. She started up.
“Hold on. Hold on,” Beth said, lifting a hand. “Shh. Listen.”
Swishing. A snort.
“Whose—?”
A shrill whinny shattered the silence. Both of their flashlights lit the spot from where it came, a few paces away. Nugget stared back at them, her reins wrapped around the trunk of a small sapling. It took only a second for May to realize what that meant.
“Chris!” she yelled and raced up the trail. She kept calling C
hris’s name and swinging her dimming flashlight beam back and forth as each step brought her to a higher altitude and closer to exhaustion. Her thighs and lungs begged her to stop or at least slow down, but she couldn’t. Beth was calling just as loudly and managing to keep up.
May stopped for a moment, gasping and swinging her light among the trees off the trail. First she searched close, then slowly moved the beam outward to cover every inch. At each turn she expected to face that guy named Vince. What if he really was out here? That was a risk she had to take.
They came to the part of the trail they called Judgment Coulee. It was the steepest section, a hard climb even in good weather, and the left side of the trail dropped off into a small coulee, or ravine.
When her beam passed over the dark heap at the bottom, she almost missed it.
“There!” Beth grabbed her arm and fixed her light at the base of one more towering pine down below.
They both took one look and bolted.
May reached the body first, falling to her knees. It was Chris. She wasn’t moving. Her eyes were closed, her mouth gaping. “No . . . please.”
Christy groaned.
“Oh, thank You, God. Thank You.” May stroked her sister’s face. She reeked of vomit and blood, but May hardly smelled it. “Chris, we’re here.”
“Don’t move her.” Beth arrived and knelt beside May, running her flashlight beam over Chris’s body, then focused the light on her ankle. There was the ragged edge of bone, and the snow beneath the leg was crimson.
Beth sprang into action and snatched the radio from May’s coat. She called to the others, giving instructions to her parents about what medical supplies to bring. “We’re going to need the backboard, more blankets, bandages. She’s hurt pretty bad and in shock. Over.” Beth handed May her blanket. “Try to get her warm without lifting or moving her. If you can, get it up to her neck. She’s hypothermic by now.”
As she did as she was told, Beth reported into the radio, “We’re at the bottom of Judgment Coulee on Squatter’s Mountain. Contact us when you’re near. I’ll meet you at the trailhead.”
May looked down at her sister’s bruised and bloodied face. She wanted to hold her, draw her close, and let her know everything would be okay, but they had internal injuries to think about.
Chris’s eyes fluttered open.
“Hey, Sis,” May said.
At first there was no recognition. Chris stared at May blankly, her blue lips moving like she was trying to say something. Her eyes closed, then after a moment opened again. “I’m . . . sorry,” she said, barely loud enough for her to hear.