Once back at Drake’s house, I place my bag and envelope down and join Drake in the dining room. He’s changed too and is looking as sexy as always. He has his back to me, but as if sensing me, he turns towards me, and when he does, his eyes widen. “Wow, you look … stunning.”
“Thank you. I wanted to make an effort this evening.”
“You never need to make an effort, but I appreciate that you did. You’ve always been a beautiful woman, Evelyn. Always.”
Just then, George walks in with our plates of food. Once he spots me, his smile spreads wide. “Evelyn, how are you, my dear?”
I start laughing. “Fine, thank you.” I look at the food, and my stomach growls. “This looks and smells divine.”
“Well, I hope it tastes just as good.” He places the food down. “Please, sit, and bon appétit.”
“Thank you,” we both say in unison.
We both sit down, and I immediately tuck into my meal. It does indeed taste as good as it looks and smells.
“You look like you’re enjoying that.”
I smile. “Oh, I am. George does cook a mean steak.”
Drake smiles, and we watch each other as we eat. I think Drake realises that conversation comes last when I’m this hungry. Once I finish, I place my knife and fork down and watch as Drake does the same.
“Dessert?” he asks as he takes a sip of wine.
“Not now. In fact, I need to discuss something with you.”
He frowns. “Oh yes?”
I nod. “Well, first I have to show you something.” I get up from my chair and walk out to the hallway. Once there, I pick up the envelope and bring it back in. Drake is watching with quiet interest, but when he sees the envelope in my hand, his eyes widen slightly.
I sit in my seat and carefully push the envelope towards him. “This is what I wanted to show you.”
Drake doesn’t move at first. He just looks down at the envelope and then at me. Finally, he leans forward, grabs the envelope, and turns to the last page. I see the moment when his face falls and his mouth parts. “You signed it.”
I grip the table as my heart starts beating rapidly in my chest. “Yes.”
He places the papers down on the table. “So, that’s it then.”
“Not quite.” He looks up at me with a frown, so I continue. “Do you still have my ring?”
“Yes. It was one of the things I managed to obtain from Isaac once I shot him between his eyes.” I notice the slight growl when he says this.
“Can you get it for me please?”
“Why?”
“You’ll see why in a bit. Please.”
Sighing, he gets up and walks towards a giant painting on the wall. He pulls it aside, and a safe is revealed. He punches in some numbers, takes out a box, and closes the safe. Once the painting is back in place, he walks towards our table, sits down, and places the box in front of me.
“Ask me,” I simply say.
Drake frowns. “Ask you what?”
I motion with my head towards the box and back up to him. “I want you to ask me like a man should ask a woman.”
It finally dawns on him what I mean, and with renewed hope in his eyes, he picks the box up and gets down on one knee in front of me.
When he looks up at me, I smile, and it encourages him enough to return the gesture. “Evelyn,” he starts, taking my hand, “I know I’m not the man of your dreams, but dreams are called such for a reason. I am your reality, however, and I can guarantee that I will love you more than any man could ever love you. I’m not perfect, and, realistically, I never will be. I just ask that you take me as I am—flaws and all. I promise to love and take care of you till the end of my days.” As my eyes water, Drake clears his throat. “Evelyn, will you marry me?”
“Yes,” I croak.
Drake beams a wonderful smile, but everything becomes blurry as the tears start to fall. In no time, Drake has the ring on my finger and me in his arms. The feel of him against me does nothing to aid my hormones.
“Erm, Drake …”
And without hesitation this time, he answers, “Yes?”
“About that dessert.” I give him a mischievous grin, and in no time at all, he has me in his arms and is making me squeal.
Once snugly there, he kisses me hungrily and smiles. “I thought you’d never ask.”
Three Years Later – Drake
How much has changed since almost three years ago. I look back on those times with quiet frustration. I always knew from the moment I met Evelyn that she was meant to be mine. I was right in what I said. No one was going to stand in my way. Not even Evelyn herself.
See, I may have changed just enough to give her the idea that I am a changed man. I guess, for Evelyn, I did change somewhat. But, old habits die hard. I knew Evelyn was going to fight me at every turn, so I came up with a plan. A plan which—I am glad to say—worked. I never intended to let Evelyn go for a single moment. If she had resisted in the end, I would have gone against my word and kept her. I very nearly lost it when she brought the divorce papers around. In fact, I was seconds away from revealing my true self when she asked me to get the ring. It was pure intrigue that made me go along with it and play her game. If she had tried to leave with that ring, then I would have acted. I can only be grateful that I played my part so well and for every occasion that I was able to hold my tongue.
I did what I did simply to make life easier and to give off the illusion that she had all the control. Evelyn has never had control. I’ve just simply allowed her the time to eventually bend to my will. It took every ounce of willpower inside of me not to take her whenever we were together. I knew she wanted me. I could tell by the way her breathing hitched whenever I touched her or by the way her pupils dilated whenever I kissed her skin. That’s why I added the immense frustration of not giving her what she wanted unless she agreed to be mine. Again, it worked, and again, it all added to her list of reasons why she was being stupid by being apart from me. I could tell the wheels in her brain were working overtime to figure out what she wanted. I was quietly convinced that she would choose to be with me. I just had to let her come to that conclusion on her own. That day when she had her first scan, I could see it in her eyes that she knew what her choice was. The final nail in the coffin was when her dad came round and she found out what I’d done. Again, this was all carefully orchestrated so that I would seem like her hero rather than her monster.
Of course I am a monster… But only when it comes to her.
“Daddy, look!” little James cries from the table. He holds out a drawing to me of the three of us holding hands in a garden. We’re all stick men, and our hair looks like a collection of bushes rather than hair.
“Wow, that looks awesome, little buddy. Wait till Mummy gets home, and you can show her.” I smile, thinking of where she is. She’s at the doctor because she’s been feeling sick. She says she can’t be pregnant because she’s been taking her pills regularly. She doesn’t want another baby for a while as she’s taking time out to concentrate on James and her career. She’s a psychologist now, and with help from me, she has an office in one of the buildings I own. I don’t like it, but it’s one of the things I allow her. Knowing that it’s my building and that there are cameras everywhere helps me feel that bit better. At least then I feel like I’m in control. I can watch how her patients interact with her, and if anyone tries to get a little friendly, I have a little word in their shell-like.
The sound of a car pulling up outside alerts us that Evelyn is back. “Mummy’s back!” James cries as he runs out of the room into the hallway.
Smiling, I get up from my chair and walk out towards the hall where I find James desperately handing Evelyn the drawing. She looks down at him and smiles, but I can tell it’s a strained smile.
“Wow, James. That looks so nice. Is that the three of us together out in the garden?” James nods. “It’s so pretty. I love it.”
James beams and once Evelyn kisses him on the head, he go
es running back into the room to carry on drawing.
“Is everything okay?” I walk up to her and place my hand on her arm. She looks pissed.
“No, everything’s not okay. I’ve just found out I’m pregnant again. How did that happen?” She throws her arms in the air.
“Baby, that’s great news!”
“No, it’s not great news!” she snaps. “I’ve only just settled in to my job, and James is still so small. I was hoping to wait at least another two or three years before having another baby. This just puts everything out of sync.”
“Come here,” I pull her into my arms and squeeze her tightly to me. “I told you the first time around that it didn’t have to affect any of your work, and I was right, wasn’t I? James is flourishing, you’re at work doing what you love, and life is wonderful. Just think of it as an added bundle of joy to enter into our lives.”
She sniffles into my chest, so I know she’s crying. “You think so?”
I gently stroke her hair. “I know so.”
I take her head and cup it in my hands. “This baby is only going to add to our family unit. I, for one, can’t be happier with the news. Nothing needs to change, Evelyn. As always, I’ve got you, and I am here.”
She smiles, giving me what I’m after. “You must have super sperm,” she jokes, making me laugh.
“Well, what do you expect?”
She hits me. “Typical male ego.” She starts to walk towards the reception room, but turns to me. “Once this baby’s born, I’m getting sterilised.”
She disappears, and I’m left with the biggest smirk on my face. She won’t get sterilised because I will never let her. I wanted her to have another baby soon after James was born, but she refused. I knew taking her pills away wouldn’t work, so I did the next best thing. I replaced them with placebos.
See, I own her heart, body, and soul, and I think she secretly knows it. I just like to give her the illusion of choice. I’m quite proud of myself really for all of my achievements.
Maybe I am a fucking monster after all.
A Surrogate Love Affair
I never believed in fate. Destiny was something magical, something written in the stars. I was a world away from having that kind of excitement in my life.
I was alone, praying for a baby, that little miracle I could hold in my arms. My husband fought me at every turn, but I knew I would break him down one day. It was just a matter of time.
In the end, fate took the shape of my best friend and her husband, who were desperate for a baby. Desperate for that miracle, that hope, that joy in their lives. I wanted to give that to them. I wanted them to have the family they were striving for.
With my help, they would finally have everything they ever wanted.
On the day I found out their little miracle was coming, fate intervened again. It would turn my world upside down, shattering my life into a million pieces. It was on that day I realised things were about to become really complicated.
“I can be your surrogate.”
Those were the five words I uttered tonight. Five little words that stunned everyone into an awkward silence. My husband, Kyle, looked at me like I had grown an extra head. Sarah, my best friend, stared in disbelief, and her husband, Ethan, looked about ready to burst. What he wanted to say, I couldn’t tell. Everything after that seemed to be a blur.
“What were you thinking tonight, Alice? I know you want a baby, but this is going too far.”
As I sit at my mirror, Kyle angrily hovering over me, I slowly take off my earrings. We had just returned from a dinner party with our friends. An innocent dinner party that suddenly ended when those five words left my lips.
Blowing out a breath, I look at him. “This isn’t about me wanting a baby, Kyle. This is about me giving my best friend a special gift. You haven’t been there when she’s cried to me about not being the woman she feels she needs to be for Ethan. I’ve had to sit there and comfort her, telling her she is all woman and more. I’m the one who has had to listen to the heartache in her voice when yet another IVF treatment doesn’t work. I want to do this for her. I want to do this for both of them.”
Kyle paces the room. I watch as the man I married fights the urge to scream and shout. I know he’s angry, but I also know he’s trying his hardest to keep it together. He spins toward me.
“Don’t you know what this means? It means you will be pregnant with another man’s baby! You will be the mother and Ethan will be the father. It will kill you to see another woman raising your baby.” When my shoulders sag, Kyle kneels in front of me. “See? You know it’s true, honey. How on earth will you manage to cope with that every day? And what about me? How do you think it would make me feel, knowing you’re carrying another man’s child?”
When a tear slides down my face, Kyle wipes it away. “It’s been over five years, Kyle.” I see him sigh, making me angry. “You said we would try for a baby after we’ve been married three years. It’s been over five.”
Kyle sweeps his eyes over my body. “Your body is beautiful, Alice. You’ve always looked so young and vivacious. Having a baby would just—”
I gasp, standing up. Kyle stands slowly, too. “So that’s what this is all about? You’re afraid if I have a baby my body will be—”
“Ruined. Yes,” he blurts out.
My eyes bulge. I can’t believe what I’m hearing. “You selfish prick.”
Kyle offers me his hand, but all I do is look at it in disgust. “Oh, come on, Alice.”
I step back and walk toward the bed. “I can’t believe you’re saying this. So the reason you won’t have a baby with me is because you’re afraid I’ll get stretch marks and saggy breasts?”
Sighing, Kyle throws his hands up in the air. “It’s not just that. I’ve heard it from my mates at work before. There are countless times I’ve heard them complain about their wives being too tired to have sex after having a baby. Many have gone as far as to say dinner’s sometimes not even ready when they get home. They’re jealous of me, though. Jealous of the fact I have a hot wife who gives me everything I need.” Holding his hands out, he walks closer to me, but I flinch away.
“Oh…my…god… I can’t believe these words are coming out of your mouth. Seriously?”
Kyle sighs again in obvious frustration. “You should be happy that other men think you’re hot.”
I huff in disgust. I can’t believe I’ve never seen this side of him. I already knew Kyle was a little reluctant about having a baby, but I never knew how deep it went. It made me see him in a completely new light.
I narrow my eyes at him. “What would make me happy is to have a husband who supports me. What would make me happy is to seal our unity of marriage by starting a family. Isn’t that the way life goes? Isn’t that the life we agreed on?”
Kyle shakes his head. “Honey, plenty of couples get married and don’t have children.”
My eyes widen. “So now you’re saying you don’t want any kids? Isn’t this something you should have told me...I don’t know...eight years ago when we first got together? Eight years ago when you told me you wanted the house, the wife, the white picket fence? Did you just say all that to get me into bed? Was it all just bullshit?”
Kyle runs his fingers through his hair. “Of course it wasn’t. I’m just not ready yet, okay? I need more time. Is that too much to ask?”
I sigh, turning back toward the mirror before sitting down in front of it. “No, it’s not. But when someone you love and trust tells you three years, you don’t expect almost another three to pass you by with still nothing.”
Kyle suddenly growls. “I’m sick of repeatedly having this same fucking argument. Why can’t you just accept the fact I’m not ready? The more you push this, the more I don’t want to have any fucking kids.” I open my mouth, but he cuts me off. “Fuck this. I’m sleeping on the couch. Looks like I am one of those suckers at work after all.”
Kyle storms out, leaving me in tears. I knew he could be cruel, but tha
t really hit me hard, and I’m sure he knew it. He’s the type who always wants to win an argument and, as long as he gets his point across, doesn’t care just how much his words sting.
Trying to push that aside, I think back to Sarah and Ethan’s house tonight. We had just finished our meal. Yes, wine was involved, but even in my woozy state, I knew I wanted to do this for them. I didn’t understand what I felt inside, but I knew I was doing the right thing. Why? Well, I haven’t figured that out yet, but I know, in my heart, this is meant to be.
“Sarah and I accept the fact we cannot get pregnant naturally. We still want a baby, so we’re exploring other avenues, aren’t we?” Staring at Sarah, Ethan places a loving hand over hers.
I was always a little jealous of the way he looked at her. It makes me wish I had that in my marriage. Mine isn’t falling apart, by any means, but Kyle can be a little aloof with me at times. It’s almost like he’s in lust with me, rather than love. From the moment he gets home from work at night until the moment he’s ready to leave the next morning, he constantly wants sex. In the beginning, it was exciting. Now, it’s become a replacement for love and companionship. It’s as if I’m only his crutch. I want the sex, but I also want to be cherished. I don’t think that’s too much to ask.