When his time was up, Mack closed the book and walked over to me.
“That was really interesting,” I said. “I have to give you credit. Nightstick? Pretty clever.”
“You liked that, huh? He smiled mischievously. “Well, I figured I might as well have a little fun with you while I’m here. The kids don’t know the difference anyway. They enjoyed the story. At least, I think they did.”
“They did. How long did it take you to come up with it?”
“Practically the entire week.” He laughed.
“Don’t you work?” I joked.
“I do, but I make time for things that are important to me.”
“Taunting me in cryptic ways is important to you?”
“The overall message was a positive one. No one knows you’re my Frankie.”
His Frankie.
“Your son knows you call me that.”
“I guess that’s true, but he doesn’t know the story. He’s never asked about it.”
Mack was giving me an intense look. I needed to get him out of here before he could see the effect he was having on me. He looked so sexy in jeans and a fitted, cable-knit sweater that hugged his chest. He smelled so effing good, too. I think it was exactly the same mix of cologne and body wash I remembered. Whatever it was, it emitted the same pheromones that always managed to drive me absolutely crazy. It had been a long time since I’d felt this kind of physical attraction toward someone.
“Well, thank you for coming in.”
Seeming to ignore my hint that he should leave, he continued staring into my eyes with that determined look and said, “Have coffee with me some afternoon this week.”
“I don’t know if that’s a good idea, Mack.”
“What’s your hesitation?”
“I’m not sure.”
“I know you’re with someone. This isn’t a date I’m asking you for. I just want to talk to you face to face...without children around.”
I wanted to say yes, but the words just wouldn’t come out. There were too many reasons why going out with him even just for coffee would have been a bad idea.
“I don’t know. It just somehow seems inappropriate.”
“You’re making it out to seem like that, yes. It would only be coffee. Maybe a cookie if you’re nice.” He winked.
There it was again. That stupid shiver that ran through me anytime he winked.
I flinched when he reached out to move a stray hair out of my eyes. Just that simple grazing of his fingertip across my forehead made my pulse react.
“Just coffee, Frankie. We got off to a weird start, and I feel like I owe you more of an explanation of how we got to this place.”
As much as it felt wrong to be meeting him, a part of me couldn’t resist.
“When?”
“You tell me.”
“Thursday at four. The Gourmet Bean in Chestnut Hill,” I quickly said before I could change my mind.
He was beaming. “I’ll be there.”
After I agreed, Mack walked over to Jonah and mussed his son’s hair before saying goodbye. Jonah didn’t look amused, although he’d handled Mack’s storytelling without needing to flee the room; I was really proud of him for that.
Later that afternoon, once the students cleared out, Lorelai snuck up on me as I was getting my things ready to leave.
She crossed her arms. “You need to spill. Right now.”
“What?”
“What’s going on between you and Mack Daddy? I was watching you two interact. I nearly had an orgasm.”
“What did you say? Mack Daddy?”
“Yes. Mack Daddy. It’s what everyone calls him around here. You didn’t know that?”
“I guess it fits.”
“He’s the talk of all the moms at drop-off. There are quite a few looking to dig their nasty, gel-manicured paws into him, including me, if I’m being honest. His voice alone is enough to make me come. I swear, if I had one of those little tape machines reporters use, I’d record him reading and play it at night.” She tilted her head, examining my expression. “That bothers you.”
Shaking my head dismissively, I said, “No, it doesn’t.”
“Yes, it does. You’re hiding something.” She squinted. “Are you seeing him?”
“No.”
“But something is going on. You guys know each other.”
“We used to.”
“I knew it! You used to date him?”
“We were roommates years ago.”
“You fucked him.”
“No.”
“Damn. No? Really?”
“Really.”
“That’s a shame. But something happened…”
“Our relationship was very complex. When we first met, we couldn’t have been more opposite from each other.”
“But you know what they say about opposites?” She flashed her teeth.
“That they attract?”
“That they have amazing sex. And with him…I bet it would’ve been more than amazing.”
Yes. I’m sure it would have been.
“Well, again, I wouldn’t know. And you need to lower your voice.”
“I think you’re lying about the no sex thing.”
“Why?”
“Because your face is totally red right now, Francesca. You look guilty.”
“Like I said, we have a history. It wasn’t exactly the stuff fairytales are made of, though.”
“So, you wouldn’t mind if I went after him? Because I think he’s really hot and sweet, and I heard he’s not with the mother anymore.”
“I don’t care what you do,” I lied, despite burning up with a frantic jealousy. It felt more like panic.
“Great. Now your eye is twitching. You’re so full of shit,” she said.
“It’s just been stressful seeing him again. What do you want from me?”
“I want to know what happened. Were you in love with him?”
I sat down and placed my hands on my forehead. “I thought I was. But it doesn’t matter, because he didn’t love me back. And honestly, I should be mature enough now to accept seeing him again. I’m really pissed at myself. I thought I’d done a good job over the years of moving on from this, but all of the feelings have come flooding back. Not to mention, I’m in a serious relationship.”
“Maybe you just thought you were moving on, but maybe you were just blocking it out.”
“You’re not helping, Lor.”
Lorelai took a few steps toward me. “We all have that one person. It’s not necessarily someone we end up with. But it’s that person who, for whatever reason, gets under your skin and stays there. You can move on, but parts of them are always with you. Sometimes, if things never had a chance to develop, if feelings are still unresolved, that person becomes an even more powerful force in your life, even in absentia.”
“So, you’re saying that because Mack and I have unfinished business, I can’t let him go.”
“Yes. Unfinished business between two people who are clearly attracted to each other is like an eternal case of blue balls.”
“Ah, the things you can learn within the walls of a parochial school.”
“Are you gonna tell me the story or what?”
“Now?”
“Well, it’s almost time for happy hour at that bar in Brookline.”
After this day, I could definitely use a drink.
I grabbed my purse. “What the hell. Let’s go.”
Lorelai teased, “Don’t say hell. It’s a Catholic school.”
PAST
“I can’t tell you how much this means to me. Are you sure your roommate won’t mind me shacking up with you guys?”
“Nah. I spoke to Mack about it. He’s cool with the whole thing. We needed another roommate anyway. Saved us the trouble of having to list the room online.”
Moses showed me around the three-bedroom apartment. Through the window facing the street, I could see the famous illuminated CITGO sign in the distance.
br />
He and I both went to Boston University, which was right down Commonwealth Avenue. Moses was a regular ball buster who hung out a lot at the student union. Since I worked at one of the cell phone stores right near there, we’d gotten to know each other. We’d shoot the shit, and when I happened to tell him my landlord was kicking me out of the small studio apartment I was renting, Moses offered me an empty bedroom in the apartment he shared with another guy.
“This is your room.”
I looked around at the large open space with burgundy-colored walls. “It’s nice, bigger than I expected.” It was empty except for a lava lamp plugged into an outlet in the corner.
“Nice lamp.”
“Yeah, Pat left that behind. It fits you, I think.”
“It kind of does. Like a hot mess.” I sat down on the bed and bounced on the spiny mattress. “This is really a lot of space for the city.”
“Yeah. You lucked out. It’s the biggest room. Neither of us felt like moving all of our shit into it when Pat moved out.”
“I can’t tell you enough how grateful I am.”
“It’ll be nice to have another nerd around.”
Moses and I were a lot alike, actually. We both wore glasses and enjoyed comics, tech gadgets, and science fiction books, among other things. We definitely had a lot of similar interests. He was also one of the few people who knew about my social anxiety and OCD tendencies. It contributed to how we met.
Moses had been one of the unlucky visitors to the store on a day when one of the new Apple phones was introduced. It was my first time dealing with that kind of a crowd, and I had a minor freak out after my only co-worker bailed. Moses saved the day, pretending to be an employee and picked up the slack while I calmed my ass down in the stock room.
When I was closing down that night, he randomly came out to me; he basically just blurted out that he was gay. Moses admitted that he felt safe telling me once he’d realized there was no way I could be judgmental after the shit I’d just pulled. That was the day we became fast friends.
“So, what’s Mack like? Is that his actual name?”
“It’s short for Mackenzie. But he goes by Mack.”
“Is he nice?”
“You’ll find him intimidating,” Moses said matter-of-factly.
“Great. Why do you say that? Is he an asshole?”
“He can be, depends on his mood. Sometimes he’s cool. But mainly, he’s just…easy on the eyes. And he knows it.”
“You mean he’s hot?”
“Yeah.” He let out a breath. “Fucking amazing.”
Shit.
I’m going to make a fool of myself.
“Does he know you appreciate…such things?” I asked.
“Does he know I’m gay?” Moses laughed. “I don’t know. We don’t talk about shit like that, but I’m pretty sure he caught me checking him out once when he whipped his dick out to take a piss in front of me.”
“That sucks. I mean…that you got caught looking.”
Moses winked. “It was worth it, though.”
Lord.
“Is he a student? What does he do?”
“His father is a politician in Virginia. Mack is in grad school at Boston College—political science. He’s doing some kind of paid internship at the State House. He’s got a girlfriend in D.C., goes back there every so often, about twice a month.”
“I see.”
“He’s not around much, which I like. Makes it seem like I live alone.”
“How did you end up living with him?”
“Craigslist.”
“Of course.”
Moses grabbed his keys. “I gotta run.”
Panic set in. “Where are you going? You’re leaving me alone?”
“You live here, Francesca.”
“I know, but what if Mack comes home?”
“What IF Mack comes home?”
“I don’t want to meet him by myself. What if he thinks I’m an intruder? Does he even know I’m moving in today?”
“Yes. I told him this morning. You’ll be fine.”
Rubbing my temples, I sighed. “Jesus.”
“Francesca…don’t freak out while I’m gone.”
“I’ll try not to.”
Despite Moses’s assurances, I hid in my room the rest of that evening. To the best of my knowledge, Mack hadn’t even come home, or at least he never bothered to introduce himself to me.
It was the middle of the night. I really had to pee but didn’t feel like leaving my room. Lifting myself out of bed, I forced myself to walk down the hall. Without my glasses, I couldn’t see much. The hallway was darker than I expected.
After feeling my way to the bathroom, I sat down on the toilet and let out a relieved breath. When trying not to wake anyone up while peeing, you have to push out at just the right speed so that it doesn’t tinkle loudly when it hits the water. I discovered that if I pushed extra hard, the stream of urine would hit the water more quietly as opposed to a loud but slower tinkle. The only problem with this method was always the risk of flatulence. I found that out the hard way when I unexpectedly passed gas.
It was loud.
I froze. It was still quiet, and I prayed that I’d dodged a bullet—that no one had overheard me fart. I wiped and opted not to run the water, so I skipped washing my hands.
Back in the hallway, I started to make my way to my room by clinging to the wall and some furniture along the way in the pitch-black apartment.
The sound of something approaching startled me.
Then what felt like a man’s rock hard torso knocked right into me.
I lost my balance then grabbed onto something for support.
“Fucking A. Get off my dick!”
That was when I realized that I’d grabbed onto him for support and was inadvertently holding his naked cock in my hand.
I whipped my hand back. “Oh, my God. I’m sorry!” I said, standing up.
“Are you alright?” he asked.
“I’m fine. I’m not hurt.”
“No, I mean, are you alright in the head? Do you always grab onto people’s junk like that?”
“No! No. It’s dark, and I’m nearly blind without my glasses. I can’t see you.”
“That sounds like a cockamamie excuse to me. Pun intended.”
I still couldn’t make out his face when I stammered again, “I’m…I’m so sorry.”
Before he could respond, I ran in the direction of my room, tripping over something before finally making my way inside and slamming the door.
The next morning, I wondered how long I could get away with staying in my room before I was forced to leave.
Moses had peeked in on me before leaving for class, and I pretended to be asleep. He likely didn’t know what had transpired between Mack and me the night before.
All night I had tossed and turned, unable to get it out of my head.
I hadn’t even met my roommate, yet I’d touched his cock. Not even touched—my hand was wrapped around it holding on for dear life!
I remembered how it felt vividly, thick and hot in my palm. I’d felt penises before. I wasn’t a virgin or anything. I’d slept with only a couple of guys, stroked a few dicks in my life but honestly could say I had never felt one quite like that one. It felt like an arm for Christ’s sake.
Oh, God.
The thought of facing him seemed unbearable. My heart was racing a mile a minute.
The clock showed nine-thirty. I was going to miss my class, which was two trolley stops away down Commonwealth Avenue. I really needed to get up.
Begrudgingly forcing my body out of bed, I rubbed my tired eyes and went in search of my purple-rimmed glasses. I threw on some clothes and made my way to the kitchen.
The house was completely quiet. I had no clue if I had missed him. If I was lucky, maybe he had already left for work or school.
After wolfing down a yogurt I’d found in the fridge, I noticed that there was some coffee left in a pot, so I decid
ed to have some. Just as I was pouring it into a mug, the door to the kitchen swung open suddenly. Startled, I somehow let the carafe slip from my hands and shatter to the floor. Glass was everywhere.
“Shit!”
“God, you are a walking disaster!” I could hear him say behind me.
“I’ll pay for it,” I simply said without turning around to look at him. “You startled me, gave me butterfingers.”
“I don’t know. You seemed to have a pretty good handle on things last night,” he scoffed.
Oh.
No.
Just kill me.
I can’t believe he said that!
I turned around slowly to face him. “Did you have to bring—” I hesitated when I caught a look at the gorgeous face behind the voice…and his tall, muscular but lean body. My heart started to beat faster. Moses had said Mack was good-looking, but my entire body actually tensed upon the realization that he was that good-looking.
I cleared my throat. “Did you have to bring that up again? It was an accident.”
Standing before me was probably the most attractive guy I’d ever been in such close proximity to. In Francesca O’Hara’s life, guys like this didn’t exist unless they were on the side of an Abercrombie and Fitch shopping bag.
His lustrous, chestnut brown hair was messy from sleep and slightly long around the ears. From his hazel eyes that glistened to the scruff on his chin, his face was simply gorgeous. His muscles were sculpted but not overly big and bulky. He was tall—bigger than life. He was freaking perfect—like New York City billboard perfect—and I was screwed.
Mack was staring intently at me, probably picking up on my intense admiration. His expression was more amused than angry.
“Those are some funky glasses you have on.”
“I told you. I’m blind as a bat. I didn’t have my glasses on when I got up to use the bathroom last night. So, I didn’t notice…you know…when I…” I lost my words.
“Practically jerked me off?”
My stomach sank. “Oh, my God,” I muttered.
“Francesca, calm down. I’m just joking around with you.” He looked down at the broken glass then back up at me.
After a moment of silence, I said, “I’m sorry. I don’t do this very well.”
“Do what very well?”
“Humans.” It was the first thing that came to mind. Even though it sounded weird, it was technically true.