Page 26 of Mom, I'm Gay

Chapter 26

  That first week with Jonathan gone and Jim in my life flew by. Jonathan did not call me or email nearly as much as I wanted to hear from him, but I knew better than to call him. He did tell me the final roommate was another girl; her name was Theresa but she called herself Tank, and she was majoring in computer technology. He briefly told me about his tour of the campus that was part of freshman week, and promised to call me over the weekend. I wanted to know so much more, but it was enough to know he was excited and happy.

  Getting ready to move and my work kept me busy, and I tried not to dwell on my empty nest. Jim was still visiting Bob, and we talked or saw each other every day. He had been vague about when he’d head home and get back to own work. By keeping in touch by phone and email, he was able to keep up with the necessary work and didn’t talk about going back. He was a huge help with getting ready for the move by not only helping Bob and Marshall pack and load their rented truck, but also by helping me. I had hired movers, and on the day the moving van brought my furniture to the condo, he helped me figure out where to put things away. I had only moved the furniture I thought would fit, and Bob and Marshall had offered to keep the rest since they didn’t have enough to fill the house, telling me they would be more than happy to buy it from me. I had told them we’d wait to see if I needed more of it before we decided about that. Jim and I worked together efficiently, ordered pizza for dinner, and as the night wore on, it just seemed to make sense to u that Jim should spend the night.

  “I think it would be nice for Bob and Marshall to spend the first night in their new home without my company,” he said when it first came up. He waited for me to answer, but I was trying to figure out what he was trying to say. Was it because he wanted to give them privacy? Was he thinking about their sex life? Then another thought crossed my mind: was he thinking about his and my sex life? Before I worked up the nerve to ask what he meant, he continued,

  “When Susie and I bought our first house, her mother came to visit for two weeks. We didn’t get to “christen” our new bedroom until she left…”

  I giggled and told him a similar story about Dick and me, this one having to do with his mother visiting just as Gabby turned six weeks old. That meant I was just given the doctor’s approval to have sex for the first time since giving birth, but we had not felt free to do that with his mother in the next room, so we had waited. I was impressed that he was able to think about Bob and Marshall in those terms, and I told him so. Our conversation was so open, that I felt comfortable, even though it surprised me, saying to him, “Jim, you staying here tonight…you’re not thinking we’ll be sleeping together, are you?”

  He chuckled, actually laughed a little out loud at that. “No! But is that an invitation?”

  I shook my head no, and he said, “Good, because that would be moving way too fast for me!”

  He slept in the guest room that first night….

  In the morning, he was up making coffee before I woke up, and he spent the rest of that morning doing anything he could to help me feel settled. He set up my computer and made sure it was working properly. Then we brought lunch to Bob and Marshall, and the two of them couldn’t hide the enjoyment they were getting out of their new home. I also sensed they were tickled that Jim and I were getting along. They were careful not to pry, but it wasn’t a secret to them that he had spent the night. Lily came by at dinner time, and brought flowers for Marshall and Bob as well as for me. Bob was in the kitchen, cooking up a storm in his new kitchen, and I thought she’d stay and have dinner with us, but she said she had to go to a school function for Danny. I realized I felt glad she didn’t stay. I was tired and I think a bit jealous. I had been wondering about the rest of the night. I wasn’t sure if I wanted Jim to come back to my place, maybe even spend the night again, maybe not in the guest room this time…I couldn’t believe I was having such thoughts! The man had not even kissed me yet, and here I was, picturing him in my bed.

  After dinner, Jim and I were walking around the yard together because Bob and Marshall had insisted they didn’t want any help cleaning up from dinner, he surprised me by telling me he was leaving in the morning. I was unable to hide my feeling of disappointment.

  “I really shouldn’t have stayed this long,” he told me. “Last night at your house, Mara, really made me think about things. I am enjoying your company so much!”

  “It’s been so wonderful having you here. I think I could get used to it without a problem.” I agreed without hesitating.

  “Don’t worry; I’ll be back before long.” He became very quiet, and we walked back in the house just as Marshall and Bob had put the last dish away.

  “I hope you don’t feel we chased you out of the house,” Marshall started to explain, “but if you felt that way, it’s true, we did.”

  Bob picked right up where Marshall stopped. “We thought you might put things where you kept them…and we’re trying to organize it for us!”

  “I understand completely,” I said. “I think it’s time for me to go home to my place.”

  There was an awkward moment, at least for me, as we all seemed to wait to see what would happen. I wondered if Bob and Marshall thought Jim would come with me, or did they know he was leaving in the morning? They hadn’t said a word about it during dinner. I turned to go out the front door, and Jim offered to walk me out to my car. It was such a strange feeling to leave my own house after all this time, but that feeling was almost eclipsed by my sadness over Jim leaving. Both feelings took me by surprise. He really hadn’t said much to me since he had told me he was leaving in the morning, and this continued as we walked. He put his hand on my shoulder and gently turned me to face him.

  “Mara, this has been an incredible eight days. Not only do I want to move here to be close to Bob, actually to learn how to be a good father to him, but now I feel this incredible magnetic attraction towards you…” His voice trailed off, and I wondered what exactly he meant. Was this because we shared having gay sons, or it was it more, along the lines I was feeling when I was thinking about him spending the night? I got my answer as he leaned towards me and gently kissed me. It was the first time I’d been kissed like that since Dick died.

 
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