“Yes.” She waited until he opened the passenger door. “Get in and drive to Adler Street.”
Cody raced around the front of the truck, and as he jumped into the driver’s seat he felt a sense of relief. Elle would help him. They’d find Carl Joseph. They had to find him.
Before the unthinkable happened.
CARL JOSEPH FELT bad about what he’d done.
The nice lady, Kelley, was his mom’s friend. Carl Joseph remembered her coming to the house. But no one said he had to stay. Cody would come back in three hours. Kelley told him that. Three hours was enough time for a field trip. Teacher said so.
When Carl Joseph went into the yard and out the gate, the bus was just coming. He remembered his wallet. “Every time you go out, Carl Joseph, make sure you have two things with you,” Teacher had said. “Your bus pass and ten dollars.” So that morning he remembered.
He walked over, and when the bus stopped, he climbed on. All by himself. And the driver was friendly. He asked where Carl Joseph wanted to go. There was no line of people, and no one was pushing him to move along, move along. He licked his lips and pulled his wallet from his jeans pocket. He showed his pass, and then something else. He showed the card from Elle Dalton. The one from the center.
“Here.” He pointed at the card. “I want to go to the center.”
The man was still friendly. He said to take the bus four stops and then he would say what to do next. Carl Joseph sat down near a window. ’Cause window seats showed the whole world outside. That’s what Gus said every time they had a field trip.
But when Carl Joseph sat down, he felt scared and sad. ’Cause maybe he should ask the driver to call his mom or call Brother. The bus was a big place without any other students. And no Teacher, too. And no Daisy, who knew the bus routes better than all the students put together.
He pushed himself close to the window and tapped his feet. Maybe he would call his mom when he got to the center. She could tell the nice Kelley that Carl Joseph was sorry for leaving. Sorry for not saying good-bye. He pressed his forehead against the glass. It felt hot, so he pulled back.
Then he remembered about the life skill. He closed his eyes. “Dear God, I don’t like this.” He whispered the prayer. But maybe it was loud because the driver looked back at him.
“You okay, pal?”
“Yes, pal.” Carl Joseph sat up straighter. “I’m okay.” His heart was pounding hard. “D-A-I-S-Y… D-A-I-S-Y.” He spelled her name a few times. Very quietly. Then he talked to God once more. “Help me, God. Help me now.”
They reached four stops, because the driver stopped the bus. Then he stood up and came back. Carl Joseph was the only person on the bus. “This is your stop.”
Carl Joseph stood, but his legs felt shaky. Like after he rode Ace. He swallowed and pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose. “What now?”
“Follow me.” The driver led him slowly down the middle aisle and slowly onto the steps. On the sidewalk, the driver pointed across the street. “Cross at the light and walk one block. There’s a blue bench. Take that bus five stops and you’ll be right at the center.”
Carl Joseph smiled. See? He could do this. He could take a bus and go see Daisy. He should’ve done it sooner. Then Brother wouldn’t have to work with him so much. It was better when he and Brother were friends. Now Brother was trying to change him. ’Cause he wanted to change him.
Carl Joseph shook the bus driver’s hand. “Thank you, pal.”
“You’re welcome.” He hesitated. “You sure you’re okay?”
“A-okay.” He felt less wobbly. A-okay was what Tammy said. It sounded professional. “Yes, very a-okay.”
The bus driver climbed back up the steps of the big bus. Then he closed the door and drove away. Carl Joseph walked six steps, ’cause he counted them. ’Cause counting was a life skill, too. Then he stopped and looked around. Was he supposed to cross straight ahead? Or straight across? He took two steps straight ahead. His heart started to beat faster again.
Then he turned and took three steps toward the other light. He blinked four times. Which way was it? He covered his face with his hands and turned around and around. First one direction, then the other. The bus driver called him Pal. Then what? Which way was he supposed to go?
“Life skills, Carl Joseph,” he told himself. “Think of life skills.” He parted his fingers and peered out. Two people passing by looked at him. They had scared faces. “Life skills,” he told them. “Time for life skills.”
The people kept walking. Carl Joseph couldn’t hear. His heart was beating too hard, ’cause he didn’t like this. He was alone and he was about to cry. But the first life skill was praying, ’cause praying made you remember that… that you were never alone! Carl Joseph dropped his hands to his sides and looked up at the sky. Straight up. It was bright blue, no rain at all. “God, I want to go to the center. I forget which way.”
He was about to look at the lights again, walk up to each crossing line and decide what to do, when he felt a hand on his shoulder. Maybe it was Brother or his mom. He turned around and right away he covered his face again.
’Cause policemen only came when there was trouble. Big, big trouble.
And right there his eyes started shaking back and forth. Back and forth and back and forth. And his mouth came open and he couldn’t say anything. ’Cause his legs and arms were shaking and then he was falling.
And everything, everywhere turned the blackest of black.
Chapter Nineteen
Nearly an hour had passed since Carl Joseph’s disappearance, and Elle was out of options. Beside her, Cody was desperate, his eyes wide, terror written into the worried lines on his forehead.
Elle pointed to the stoplight just ahead. “Turn right, there’s another bus stop just down the street.” Her heart pounded, and she felt sick to her stomach. No matter how hard she prayed, Carl Joseph wasn’t turning up. They’d driven three times by every bus stop familiar to Carl Joseph, but there was no sign of him.
“He could be almost to Denver by now.” Cody made the turn, and the muscles in his right forearm flexed from the death grip he had on the steering wheel. A raspy sigh slid through his teeth. “It’s my fault. I should’ve stayed with him. Of course he’d try to find a way back to the—”
The ring of Cody’s cell phone stopped him cold. He took the wheel with his left hand, grabbed the phone, and flipped it open. “Hello?”
Elle couldn’t hear the caller’s response, but all at once the tension seemed to leave Cody’s body. “Thank You, God…” He paused. “We’re close. Maybe five minutes.”
“He’s at the center?” Elle leaned closer, her voice a whisper.
Cody nodded. “Okay… yes, we’re on our way.” He snapped the phone shut and set it on the seat. Then, as if it were the most natural thing in the world, he took hold of her hand as he sucked in a long breath. “He’s safe.”
Elle couldn’t respond. The feel of Cody’s hand in hers burned all the way up her arm, screaming at her to let go. Never mind the high stakes, or how differently things might’ve turned out. Regardless of the emotion of the past hour, Cody was married. Holding his hand made her the worst of women.
But in that moment she couldn’t let go of his hand if her life depended on it. Elle worked to find her voice. “How… how did they find him?”
Cody didn’t seem to notice her struggle. He focused on the road ahead, and when it was safe he flipped a U-turn. “I guess he boarded a bus and showed the driver your card. Told the guy he wanted to go to the center.” Cody glanced at her. Relief shone in his eyes. “He must’ve gotten confused between buses.” He ran his thumb along the side of her hand. The worry was back in his voice. “He had a seizure just as a police officer found him.”
Let go of his hand, Elle told herself. But his touch was intoxicating. “He had a seizure?”
“The officer helped him through it. He’s with my mom in the parking lot of the center.”
Elle tried
to picture Carl Joseph on a bus by himself, trying to make a connection without any of the tools or help he was used to. And if he had a seizure, how come the officer hadn’t taken him to the hospital? She still had questions, but they would be answered in a minute or so when they reached the center. All of them but one.
Why was she still holding the hand of a married man?
CODY WAS INTENTLY aware of Elle’s presence beside him, the faint smell of her perfume, and the way her hand felt in his. In the past hour the underlying connection he’d been feeling toward her, the attraction, had all but consumed him. Even so, while he was still frantic to find Carl Joseph, he didn’t dare act on it, didn’t consider taking her hand.
Now, though, in his relief, he had the overwhelming desire to pull over and take Elle in his arms, hold her, and thank her for caring about Carl Joseph the way she did. But the idea was only a crazy passing thought. Elle seemed uncomfortable, and little wonder. With Carl Joseph’s accident, he had never had a chance to tell her how she’d succeeded. How much he believed in her work now that he’d seen it for himself.
In some ways, she must’ve still seen him as the enemy.
He released her hand as they pulled into the parking lot. His mother was parked in the front row, and Cody took the spot beside her. He turned off the engine and let his head fall back against his seat. “I didn’t think it would matter.”
“What?” She took hold of the door handle.
He turned so he could see her. “Praying.” Awe filled his heart, his soul. “I prayed from the moment I heard he was missing, and it worked.”
She smiled, but it didn’t quite reach her eyes. “Praying always works.” Her tone was sad, resigned. “Even if sometimes we don’t like the answer.” She opened the door. “I have to get back inside.” She glanced past him to Carl Joseph. “Bring him inside before you go?”
Cody searched her eyes. He didn’t want to upset things any more than he already had. “You sure?”
“Yes.” She stepped out, but her eyes held his. “Daisy misses him.” She hesitated. “A lot. She’s become a different person without Carl Joseph.”
“All right.” He opened his door. “Give us a few minutes.”
Elle nodded and then she hurried back inside the center. Cody watched her go, and he realized he’d been holding his breath. She had that effect on him—and there was no denying it. But even with his lack of experience he could easily read her.
She wasn’t interested.
He climbed out and knocked on Carl Joseph’s car door.
His brother jerked around and his eyes grew wide. He flung his door open, hurried out. Then, all at once, shame and sorrow seemed to hit him. “I’m sorry, Brother. ’Cause I didn’t ask first.” Carl Joseph shook his head, his mouth hanging open as if he couldn’t find the right words. He pushed his glasses back into place. “I’m so, so sorry.”
Cody couldn’t take another moment. He pulled his brother into his arms and held him tight. “Buddy… I’m so glad you’re okay.” The hug lasted a long time, and when Cody released him, he put his hands on Carl Joseph’s shoulders and stared straight into his eyes. “This wasn’t your fault, Buddy. I never should’ve left you.”
“No.” Carl Joseph shook his head, a little at first and then more strongly. “No, ’cause the driver said, ‘You okay, pal?’ and I told him yes and then I wasn’t sure to cross that way.” He pointed straight ahead. Then he pointed out to the side, “Or that way. And so no, Brother, it isn’t your fault.”
Their mom was out of the car now. She came up and put her arms around both of them. “Did Elle say we could stop in?”
“Yes.” Cody wasn’t sure what was going to happen next for Carl Joseph. He wanted to hear more about his seizure, and another doctor’s visit was already set up for tomorrow morning. His mom had told him that much when she called. But for now, they needed to get inside because that’s what his buddy wanted.
Badly enough that he’d risked his life to get here.
The three of them walked toward the center door. Through the window they could hear the sounds of swing music and happy laughter. Clearly the students had been spared news of the ordeal.
“I’ll get it.” Carl Joseph seemed slower than usual, but he stepped in front of Cody and their mother and held open the door.
A swing dance session was in full progress inside. All except for Daisy. Carl Joseph’s friend was sitting at an art table in the far corner of the room, alone. Cody’s heart sank. Daisy was the most sociable student in the class. Her solitary behavior could be caused by only one thing.
Elle looked over, and immediately her face lit up. “Carl Joseph!” She smiled and hurried toward him. All signs of the regret and sorrow she’d shown earlier were gone. She took Carl Joseph into her arms and hugged him. “Are you okay?”
“I am now.” He grinned at Elle and then at the students, who were one at a time stopping and turning toward him. “I wanted to come here really bad. ’Cause here’s where I get my goal one day. Where I grow up like a man.” He moved closer to Elle and lowered his voice to what he must’ve thought was a whisper. “I can’t grow up around Brother.”
Elle shot a sympathetic look at Cody.
Cody wanted to shout at both of them that he was on their side. But it wasn’t the time. Besides, he was still stinging from Carl Joseph’s words, playing them again in his mind. I can’t grow up around Brother. No wonder Carl Joseph had been difficult the last few weeks.
Carl Joseph was going on about how happy he was to be back. “I missed this place bad, Teacher!” Carl Joseph nodded fast. “Really bad.”
“That’s for sure.” Their mother looked exhausted, but she was smiling. She leveled her eyes at Elle. “Thank you… for everything.”
Elle’s smile softened. She patted Carl Joseph’s shoulder just as someone turned off the music. A chorus of voices began talking all at once, the students calling Carl Joseph’s name and clapping their hands. Elle raised her voice so she could be heard over the noise. “Your classmates have missed you. Especially one of them.”
Carl Joseph laughed, the loud lovable open-mouthed laugh Cody hadn’t heard around the house since the accident. “D-A-I-S-Y!”
“Yes, that’s the one.” Elle led the way to the back of the classroom.
Cody was drained from the scare. He hung back with his mother while Elle linked arms with Carl Joseph and walked him to the students. It took a few seconds, but a chain reaction started.
Gus covered his mouth with both hands and then slid them along the side of his face to the top of his head. He danced in a circle and raised both arms high. “Carl Joseph is back!” He looked at the others and motioned for them to follow. “Carl Joseph is back, everybody!” He ran toward Carl Joseph so fast he tripped. Three other students helped him up, and just like that, Cody watched his brother become surrounded by the support of his friends.
Sid frowned at Carl Joseph. “You should never go that long without coming to class.” But after a few seconds, he smiled, too. “Never again, Carl Joseph.”
Some of the students were jumping in place, clapping and laughing and talking all at the same time.
“We have a new bus route! You have to know the new bus route.”
“Look at my haircut, Carl Joseph. Hair-cutting is a life skill!”
“We cooked asparagus, so now you can cook asparagus if you want asparagus.”
Those who weren’t shouting came up and patted Carl Joseph’s back. A few of them thanked him. “Finally our class is together again.” Tammy swung her long braids one way and then the other. “Thank you for coming back, Carl Joseph!”
Only then did Cody see Daisy. She had left the art table, and now she was walking up to the group. Her mouth hung open, and tears streamed down her face. At the same time, Carl Joseph seemed to take inventory of the faces around him, and he must’ve realized who was missing. In a sudden frantic burst of motion he made one half turn and then another, until finally he saw her coming close
r. He smiled bigger than Cody had seen since he’d been home.
“Daisy…” He parted the circle of friends and ran to her, arms outstretched, big oaflike steps, all the way across the room.
But Daisy didn’t run to meet him. She hung her head and kept crying, stifling quiet sobs as Carl Joseph made his way to her. Cody and his mother drew nearer so they could hear.
“Daisy, what’s wrong?” Carl Joseph put his hand on her shoulder. “I’m here now.”
“You… left me.” Her words were hard to understand through her deep emotion. She looked up and her nose was red, her cheeks wet. “I didn’t know where you were. Even when it rained.”
Carl Joseph’s eyes grew wide and his lips parted. Cody understood the shock and regret in his expression. He had let his friend down and he felt terrible, wracked with guilt. He released a quiet gasp. “I’m sorry, Daisy. I wanted to be here. I did.”
She seemed to grow calmer in light of his explanation, but still there was something in her expression. Hurt and betrayal. And it was then that Cody felt the pain of Carl Joseph’s last several weeks worst of all. What had they done, keeping him away from the center? Away from Daisy and Elle and Gus and everyone here?
Elle caught his eye. Then, dabbing at her own cheeks, she approached him and his mother. “I know you don’t agree, but”—she looked at Carl Joseph and Daisy—“he belongs here.” She hesitated, clearly struggling with her emotion. “He needs this.”
Their mother looked at Carl Joseph, at the way he had both his hands on Daisy’s shoulders now, how he was looking straight into her eyes, trying to convince her that he hadn’t meant to be gone, that he had missed her as much as she missed him. The wounded look in Daisy’s eyes was fading. She gave Carl Joseph the slightest smile. Mary touched her fingers to her throat and turned her attention back to Elle. “You’re right.” Her voice cracked. “But his health… I don’t know how we can do it.”
The other students made their way over to Daisy and Carl Joseph. By then Daisy was smiling, and Carl Joseph was doing a silly dance trying to make her laugh.