“No!” yelled at least five people.
Raine drew his sword, pointed it at them. “Get away, all of you. The boy is no thief. Now, who will be the first to lose his life over this lie?”
“We’ll punish the boy,” someone yelled before the crowd began to disperse.
Chapter Eleven
IT WAS A very long while before Alyx could move away from the protection of Raine’s solid form. Her knees were trembling and she clung to his arm.
“I didn’t steal the knife,” she finally managed to whisper.
“Of course not,” Raine snapped, but she could tell from his expression that he wasn’t dismissing the incident.
“What will happen now?”
“They will work to get what they want.”
“And what is that?”
“A trial and your banishment. Before you came I promised them justice. I swore that all wrongdoers would be punished.”
“But I have done no wrong,” she said, on the verge of crying.
“Would you like to put that before a group of them? They would find you guilty even if you were the Holy Mother.”
“Buy why, Raine? I have done nothing to them. Last night I even tried to sing for them, but they turned away.”
He was serious when he looked down at her. “Has your music always been enough for people? Has no one ever asked more of you than to sing prettily?”
She had no answer for him. For her there’d been no life except her music. To the people of her town all they’d expected of her was music, and it was enough for them as well as for herself.
“Come,” Raine said. “We must make some plans.”
Glumly, she followed him, her head down, not meeting an eye of anyone they passed. This anger directed toward her was something so new to her.
Once they were in the tent, Raine spoke quietly. “Tomorrow we will leave the forest.”
“Leave? We? I don’t understand.”
“The people are poisoned against you, and it will no longer be safe for you to stay here. I cannot protect you every minute of the day and I cannot allow them to harm you. Tomorrow morning we’ll leave.”
Alyx, so aware of the hate of the people just outside the thin walls, could barely listen to him. “You cannot leave,” she murmured. “The King will find you.”
“Damn the King!” Raine said angrily. “I cannot stay here and worry that each day one of them will turn on you. You cannot sing your way out of this, Alyx. For all their look of it they are smarter than the horses you charm. They will do what they can to hurt you.”
Alyx was beginning to listen to him. “You would go with me?”
“Of course. I couldn’t very well let you leave alone. You wouldn’t last a day outside in the world.”
Tears blurred her eyes. “Because other people would also find out what I am? That I am a vain, arrogant person who cares for no one but herself?”
“Alyx, you are a sweet child and you care for me.”
“Who could not love you?” she asked simply. “You have more kindness in your little finger than I have in all my body. And now you risk capture and imprisonment to save me.”
“I will take you to my brother and—”
“And Gavin will risk the King’s wrath because he harbors a woman wanted for witchcraft. Would you jeopardize all your family for me, Raine? Do you love me that much?”
“Yes.”
Alyx’s eyes flew to his, saw the love there, and instead of giving her pleasure it gave her pain. “I must be alone,” she whispered. “I must think.”
He followed her to the tent flap and as she left, he called Jocelin to him.
As Alyx made her way through the dark forest to the stream, her thoughts jumbled about in her mind. She sat on a rock, staring at the dark, sparkling water.
“Come out, Joss,” she called. “You are a poor follower,” she said despondently when he sat beside her. “Did Raine order you to protect me?”
Joss remained silent.
“He has to protect me now,” she said. “He can’t leave me alone for even minutes for fear someone will punish me.”
“You have done no wrong.”
“I have not stolen, true, but what good have I done? Look at Raine. Now he could be in another country living in comfort, but he chooses to stay in this cold forest and help his countrymen. He protects them, sees that they are fed, works for them always. And yet there is a reward on his head and he must stay here while his family needs him. His sister is raped and commits suicide and in his grief he does not even stop work for an hour.”
“Raine is a good man.”
“He is a perfect man,” she said.
“Alyx,” Jocelin whispered, his hand on her arm, “Raine will protect you from the people, and what time he can’t be near, I will be. Your love for him has helped him through his grief.”
It came as no surprise to her that Joss knew she was a woman. “What good is my love? I am not worthy of him. Tomorrow he plans to leave this camp, to ride freely into the sunlight of a country where he is fair game for the King’s wrath. He will leave the safety of the forest and risk prison or even death to protect me.”
Again Jocelin was silent.
“Don’t you have anything to say? No soothing words telling me Raine’s life will be safe?”
“He will be in great danger if he leaves the forest. Raine is well-known and easily recognized.”
A great sigh escaped Alyx. “How can I let him risk so much for me?”
“So what do you plan to do?” Joss asked sharply.
“I will leave by myself. I cannot stay and cause Raine worry, and he cannot leave with me. Therefore I will go alone.”
Joss’s laugh startled her. “I’m sure Raine Montgomery will be as obedient as a lap dog. You will inform him you plan to leave and he will meekly kiss you goodbye and wish you well.”
“I am prepared for a fight.”
“Alyx,” Jocelin laughed. “Raine will toss you across his horse and carry you out of the forest. You can yell all you want, but when it comes to the point, muscle will win over words.”
“You are right,” Alyx gasped. “Oh, Joss, what can I do? He cannot risk his life for me.”
“Love him,” Joss said. “That’s all he wants. Go with him, stay with him. See him through everything.”
She jumped up from the rock, hands on hips, glaring at Jocelin. “What am I to do when he is killed because of me? Should I hold his cold hand and sing a sweet song to the Lord? No doubt I’ll make magnificent music, and everyone will say how I must have loved him. No! I don’t want cold hands. I want hot ones loving me—or loving anyone, for that matter. I’d rather give Raine back to Blanche than see him dead.”
“Then how are you going to make him stay here?” Jocelin asked quietly.
She sat down again. “I don’t know. Surely there must be something I could say. Perhaps if I insulted his family.”
“Raine would laugh at you.”
“True. Perhaps if I told him he were a . . .” She couldn’t think of a single thing she hadn’t already called him. Obviously names would not harm him. “Oh, Joss,” she said desperately, “what can I do? Raine must be protected from himself. If he were to leave the forest no doubt he’d pursue Chatworth, and then the King would become involved in the quarrel and—I can’t let it happen! What can I do?”
It was a long moment before Jocelin spoke and when he did, she barely heard him. “Go to bed with me.”
“What!” She whirled on him. “I am talking to you of a man’s safety, his possible death and you are trying to woo me to your bed? If you want a woman, get one of those hags who pant after you. Or take Rosamund to your bed. I’m sure she’d enjoy it more than I would.”
“Alyx,” he chuckled, hand on her arm. “Before you launch into me more fully, listen to me. If you are serious about Raine’s staying here, there is nothing you can say to make him stay, but perhaps there is something you can do. He doesn’t really know you very wel
l, not enough to trust you, or perhaps no man ever trusts a woman. If Raine were to find you with another man there would be nothing you could say to make him take you back. He would let you go and he would stay here.”
“He would hate me,” she whispered. “He can have a violent temper.”
“I thought you were serious about this. A moment ago you said you’d rather Blanche had him.” He nearly choked on the woman’s name. “Are you hoping that you can leave Raine now and later when he is again in the King’s good graces, you can come back to him? That would only happen in a song you wrote yourself. The only way Raine Montgomery will let you leave this forest without him is if his feelings for you are totally reversed.”
“To change his love to hate,” she whispered.
“Do you dream of his standing and waving goodbye to you, tears in his eyes?” Joss asked sarcastically. “Alyx, you love him too much to hurt him. Tomorrow let him take you out of here. His brothers will protect him until the King pardons Raine.”
“No! No! No!” she shouted. “No one could protect him from an arrow. Even in this forest surrounded by guards, he was shot. To leave would risk death. How could I hurt him more than to kill him?”
She buried her face in her hands. “But to have him hate me! To change the way he looks at me from love to hate—Oh, Joss, that is a great price to pay.”
“Do you want his love or his life? Would you rather sing over his grave or know he is alive but in another woman’s arms?”
“I’m new to this idea of love, but right now the idea of another woman touching him makes me prefer his death.”
Joss tried to keep from smiling. “Is that what you truly want?”
“No,” she said softly. “I want him alive, but I also want him with me.”
“You must choose one.”
“And you believe the only way to get him to stay is to . . . to bed someone else?”
“I can think of nothing else.”
Her eyes widened. “But what of you, Joss? Raine would be very angry with you.”
“I daresay he will.”
“What will you do? Your life here could be hell.”
Joss cleared his throat. “If I want to keep my life, I think I should leave also. I wouldn’t like to indulge in a duel with Raine after making love to his woman.”
“Oh, Joss,” she sighed. “I would be ruining your life as well as mine. You’re wanted for murder. What if someone recognizes you?”
She didn’t see Joss start at her words. He had no idea she knew his history.
“I’ll grow a beard and you, as a boy, will not be known. We’ll sing together, play, and we’ll be able to earn our keep.”
Pagnell was her first thought, but she brushed it away. For the first time in her life she wasn’t going to think of herself first. “Raine has had so much tragedy in his life. His sister’s death was so recent, and now . . .”
“Make up your mind, Alyx, and get your clothes off. If I’m right, Raine is coming this way now.”
“Now?” she gasped. “I need time to think.”
“Choose,” he said, close to her. “Dead and yours or alive and someone else’s?”
The image of Raine quiet, forever silent, made her throw her arms about Jocelin’s neck, her lips seeking his.
For many years, Jocelin had been an expert at removing women’s clothes, and it was something he had not forgotten. Even if Alyx did wear boy’s clothes, it was amazing how quickly Joss’s skillful fingers rid her of them. Before she could come up for air, both of them were nude from the waist up, bare flesh against skin.
Jocelin entwined his hands in Alyx’s hair and pulled her head back and kissed her hungrily as her eyes flew open in alarm.
She did not have a second to consider Joss’s kiss because Raine’s powerful hands pulled them apart, sending both of them flying across the stream bank.
“I will kill you,” Raine said under his breath, his eyes boring into Jocelin’s.
Alyx, dazed from the flight Raine’s hands had sent her on, thrust her arms into her shirt as she saw Raine drawing his sword and bellowed, “No!” loud enough to make the trees drop their nighttime dew. Give me strength, she prayed as she stood.
She placed her body before Joss’s. “I will give my life for this man,” she said with feeling. As she saw the looks on Raine’s face changing from bewilderment to hurt, to anger, to coldness, she felt them in her heart.
“Have I been a fool?” he asked quietly.
“Men are like music,” she said as lightly as she could manage. “I cannot exist on a diet of love songs or alone on dirges. I need it all. I must have variety in men as well as in my songs. You, ah, you are a song of fury, of cymbals and drums, while Joss”—she fluttered her lashes—“Joss is a melody of flutes and harps.”
For a moment, she thought perhaps Raine was going to tear her head from her body, and instead of feeling fear she was almost welcoming him. Her soul was praying that he wouldn’t believe her. Could he truly believe that music meant more to her than he did?
“Go from my sight,” he whispered from deep inside himself. “Let . . . your friend care for you from now on. Leave tonight. I do not want to see you again.”
With that he turned to leave, and Alyx was several steps toward him before Joss grabbed her arm. “What can you say to him now except the truth?” he asked. “Leave him alone. Break the tie now. Wait here and I will return in a short while. Do you have any other clothes or other possessions?”
She shook her head and was barely aware that Jocelin left her alone.
There didn’t seem to be any thoughts that went through her head as she waited for him to return. Raine believed her, believed that she thought her music was so very, very important. The people of the camp were willing to believe she was a thief and were eager to see her punished. Yet what had she ever done in her life to make anyone trust her, believe that she was a good person?
“Are you ready?” Jocelin asked from beside her, Rosamund a silent shadow behind him.
“I am sorry I have caused you—” she began.
“No more,” Joss said firmly. “We must look to the future now.”
“Rosamund, you will look after him? See that he eats? See that he doesn’t train too hard?”
“Raine will not listen to me as he does to you,” she said in her soft voice, her eyes devouring Jocelin.
“Kiss her,” Alyx whispered. “Someone should give their love and not hide it.” With that she turned away, and when she looked back she saw Rosamund clinging fiercely to Jocelin. When he returned to Alyx there was a look of surprise on his face.
“She loves you,” Alyx said flatly before they started the long journey to reach the outer edges of the forest.
PART II
August 1502
Chapter Twelve
ALYX PUT HER hand on the small of her back and eased herself down in a grassy patch just off the road, giving a grateful little smile to Joss when he handed her a cup of cool water.
“We’ll rest here for tonight,” he said, his eyes studying the tired lines on her face.
“No, we must play tonight—we need the money.”
“You need rest more!” he snapped, then sat down beside her. “You win. You always do. Hungry?”
Alyx gave him a look that made him smile, and he glanced downward to her big belly as it pushed out the wool of her dress. The summer’s heat and their constant walking made Alyx miserable.
It had been just over four months since they’d left Raine’s camp, and in that time they’d barely stopped walking. At first it hadn’t been difficult. They were both strong and healthy and they were popular musicians. But after a month on the road, Alyx became ill. She vomited so often people refused to travel with them, fearing the boy had some disease. And Alyx became so weak she could hardly walk.
They stayed for a week in a little village while Jocelin sat by the city gates and sang for pennies. Once Alyx came to him carrying bread and cheese, and as he watched
her he thought how she’d changed since the time in the forest. Perhaps it was because he’d grown to care about her lately that she seemed to have grown lovelier, softer, prettier. Her boyish swagger had turned into a gentle, rolling, definitely female walk. And even though she’d been ill, she was gaining weight.
All of a sudden, it had hit Joss what was “wrong” with Alyx: she was carrying Raine’s child. By the time she reached him he was laughing, and if they’d been alone, he’d have swirled her about in his arms.
“I will be a burden to you,” Alyx said, but her eyes were alight. Before Joss could reply, she began chattering. “Do you think he will look like Raine? Would it be wrong to pray for a child to have dimples?”
“Let’s save our prayers and wish for the means to dress you as a woman. If I travel with a pregnant boy I don’t think I will live long.”
“A dress,” Alyx smiled, something soft and nice to make her feel like a woman again.
Once Jocelin was relieved of his feeling that Alyx was dying of some dread disease, he was more confident about allowing her to journey from castle to castle. And Alyx, after finding she had not lost all of Raine, was in much better spirits. She talked constantly about the baby, what it would look like, how Raine’s features would look on a girl and if she did have a girl, she hoped the child would not grow to be quite as big as her father. Alyx also laughed over the fact that she never did anything properly. Instead of being ill the first three months, she was ill the second three.
Joss listened to everything over and over again. He was so pleased she was no longer silent and sullen as she’d been for months after they left the forest. At night, sleeping on pallets on the floor of whatever house they were performing at, he often heard her crying, but she did not mention her sorrow during the day.
Once they played and sang at a large manor house belonging to one of Raine’s cousins. Alyx had again become very silent, but he could almost feel her straining to hear any bit of news.
Jocelin had dropped a few hints to Montgomery’s wife and the woman had told him much. Raine was still in the forest and King Henry, in his grief over the death of his eldest son, had nearly forgotten the outlawed nobleman. The King was much more worried about what to do with his son’s wife, the Princess Katherine of Aragon, than what to do about a private feud. He ignored the petitions of the Montgomery family to punish Roger Chatworth. After all, Chatworth had not killed Mary Montgomery, only raped her. He had harmed her in no way. It was on the girl’s soul that she committed suicide.